@kittydemon27 - Tumblr Blog

"Everything I did was for you. Coming back was for you. Everything I did felt like it was never enough. No matter how loving and sweet to you it was never enough. I just kept thinking. I have to so this for her. Things will get better. You fucked me up. Eveeyrhing I did was for you. Every asked me why did you go back to her. You were so happy. You cared about your self. You were doing better for yourself. Now all do is worry and blame yourself."

Kill me.

Fuck this. Fucking tells me not to so hard on my self then say that I fucked them up. Says that hell be there for me as a friend, bit then is fucking bitter to me, isnt really there for me.

Fuck you!

Fuck this!

After his much you told me your life was happier when we broke up the the Frist time. Fucking go back to that then. Cause I clearly make you miserable. I'm clearly an awful person. So go be happy. Without me.

Ho have friends, go fuck her for all I care. Go do what ever make you fucking happy. Cause it's not me.

Worry about your own life. Stop worrying about me, and what my metal health may fucking do to me. Cause honestly I died, I would being doing to the world a favor.

And like you fucking said you dont care about my opinion or what I think of you anymore, you dont care if I'm crying, even your friends question why you even came back to me. So go. And do what you tell me. "Go be happy cause you deserve to be happy. YoU ARe LoVEd." By everyone you have ever meet. You have friends. You have more then you ever did before. Go fucking enjoy life for once. Cause you clearly never did with me.

highlandcattleofsaarela

spitsister

oh my god the forest spirits are awake! hello!

PRECIOUS

@caitilines

after party

kirby!! <3

I can't do it. Everyday I try to take it off. I cant do it. It hurts me so much. It hurts me to wear it hurts me to not.

It hurts me to not call you on my break, or text you when I get home.

It feel like I've lost half me heart. I feel even more broken. I love you. But its over now. And it hurts so much.

I cant stop thinking of you. You never leave my mind.

"I know that I'm the one that you miss

Even though I'm not the one that you kiss

Reminisce, reminisce, reminisce

Status present with my senses dismissed

You gave me all these memories

But now you're just a memory

Everything you do is addicting as fuck

So everything I do is I miss you as fuck

And everything you do is so distant as fuck

So everything I do is just resist you and fuck

But not everything that pass me

Matter fact I just let one pass me

Cause I was daydreaming of you so nasty

Guess that's why they call me Papi Gnashty

Don't you get it, don't you get it?

I'll meet you in my daydreams if you with it"

Like I dont what do I want to talk to you about my how I'm feeling. And that I'm sad and hurt. But I can't.

Were not that anymore. My best friend, the one person I've trusted so much the last 4 years, is gone. And I do t think well ever be able to be beat friends again. To be there for each like before again. To support each other like before again.

It's so hard for me to make friends and trust people. And you are the one person I trust the most. And now your gone. Now things are different.

And I feel so lost and alone without it. Without my best friend, without the person and feel so heartaching-ly hard for without the person I put all my trust into to.

I cant take it off. Cause I lost my best friend, and this was the most heart warming, meaningful, emotional value, thing I received from you. It means everything to me. It hurts me to wear it but it hurts me more to not.

I just want to lay in bed and cry all day. I want to cry until I suffocate and I cant breath and everything stops.

I just cant stop feeling so hurt. Feeling so sad. You seem so much better without me ready. You seen like a weight was lifted off you and that weight was me.

It hurts so much. I've been up for less then an hour and all I've done is cry. I hate this. I hate everything. I hate feelings and emotions and fears. I hate living life.

I cant talk to my friends I made at school about this stuff. Cause everytime I do, they cut me off and change the subject or just completely ignore me.

Like your so lucky you have good friends to be there for you. Cause I dont.

And I'm so hurt. To be told I'll still be there for you. And that you would come with me to the psychologist then all saddened be told "I'm not coming. I thought I said that. Sorry if that wasn't clear" that hurt me so much. I just want the support of some I trust and love to be there with me. I need support in my life, especially for this like this. All I'm looking is for some support. To for you to be my motivation and to us you as my backbone and rely on you.

Like it's hard having metal health problems, and it scary to be put on medication. And I'm terrified of being down town alone, it so fucking sketchy. I just wanted some reassurance and support when I take my Frist steps to getting better. Cause I dont have much other support in my life, and it would be nice to have a familiar face there to help keep my anxiety down.

But I'm not using you.

catchymemes

What vets do behind closed doors

shoggoth-the-bitch

I saw the caption and was so worried for a second

magicalshopping

♡ Mythical Mew Pins ♡

Kickstarter ends November 7th!

please don’t remove this caption! (◕‿◕✿)

catchymemes

tooiconic

OH MY GOD LOOK AT HIM

thatdisasterauthor

There are so many cute things on my dash tonight and I am delighted.

I'm happy your doing better. You deserve all this happiness that just dosen't happen when your with me. You deserve to experiment, have goals and friends and to be happy. I'm sorry that it just wasnt with me.

I'm sorry I held you back, and that I didnt know what do you when you were trying to be you.

I feel like long distance broke us beyond repair, and I dont know if well ever come back from it.

I never thought the day would come that we and become, you...................

..and me. Not us, just me. And just you.

I'm glad that you have friends that are behind your back to support you, even my bestfriend is really there for you.

I'm happy your experimenting sexually cause I cant give you that.

I'm happy that your being the best you right now. I'm just sad that it cant be with me.

You deserve so much better then me.

And I'm scared,

That you'll fine it.

Because I want nothing but you, but your not mine anymore. And I respect that, but, I'm also selfish. I just want to be with me.

But I'm not okay. And that makes you not okay. And I'm working on being okay. But I'm so scared. Everything seems so scary to me.

My world is being flipped upside down. And I feel like I'm falling. And I cant make you fall with me.

I put on my "best self" for others. "Im confident, brave independent". But I'm not. I'm scared, cowardly, and dependent. I'm scared of people, being/feeling alone, being not liked, that I'm really not worth the life I'm given. I hide from my own feelings, I hide from this I can't face, I hide. I hate being alone, I hate going places alone, I depend on help from others. I'm not who "my best self" is, it's just what I what people to see, because I hate who I am.

I need to fix my mind, it's so broken in there..... I'm so broken.

I'm so tired of being treated like I chose to have these mental health problems. Like I'm choosing to think the things I do, the things I feel. Cause I dont. I'm tired of this.

I dont understand stand. I'm trying to want to be happy, I'm trying feel okay. I'm trying to do things to be happy. But isnt not easy. Especially alone.

I have one person saying I dont have to do it alone. But then one person telling me i have to do it alone.

I have one person saying I'm aloud to to scared and need support and they'll support me.

And another telling I dont have support and I have to to do it alone.

I'm so confused.

I dont know what I'm being told.

I dont dont understand why I'm being to to go to the hospital because I'm sad right. But I'm hurt by what he told told, because I'm scared, because I'm crying.

Why dose that I mean I have to go the hospital. I was sad there too. But that didn't change anything, the same thing happened as every other time. I sit there for 4 hours to talk to 3 people. So why should I go right now because I m sad and cry.

I ruin everything. In the end, I'm the problem. I'm always the problem.

"I feel like I’m dying on the inside

But I smile it off

I'm a mess, I'm depressed, I'm alone and it’s all my fault

Did I do something wrong? This feeling’s unfair

You're making me anxious but why the fuck do I care?

I overthink everything til' my thoughts are impaired

I hate everything about me I think I need some air"

My my bed smells like him and it getting to me. As I burie my face in the smell and cry, all I can think about is that everything is all my fault. I cause all this. This is my fault. I shouldn't be here. I'm so worthless.