kitty

[kittyxah]

taesunxah‌:

“You’re under our spell, this is AriaHex!” The girls all spoke in unison as the camera cued them. An assortment of waves and smiles followed.

“Hello, everyone. Welcome to our first live show. We are an upcoming girl group under Galaxy Central Music. The goal of our group is to enchant you, as if hexed, by telling captivating stories, performing hypnotizing dances, and beautiful music.” Taesun spoke professionally with a smile on her face. Her heart moving faster than her mouth as she read from the script in front of her. She looked briefly at the view count, already ten thousand were watching. The promoters were doing their job.

“Now we will introduce our members. I am leader and main vocalist Ahn Taesun.”

They were to start on the right and move left, like the way the Japanese read. That meant Kitty was the first to introduce herself besides Taesun. She was wearing pink felt cat ears and white sweater with blue pyjama shorts. She felt like this, along with being assigned a lying down position, was all in effort to hide her ugly body. At least going early meant it was over soon.

“I’m Kitty! Mew, mew, meow! I hope to have fun together!” Kitty winked at the camera and did the introduction as she’d been asked to. Cute and stupid, that was her brand now. She poked her cat ears, a fake s mile still on her round little face. She hoped her appearance hadn’t deterred anyone. 

[fayexah-blog]

Faye was probably the worst dancer out of her entire group. She knew it, they knew it, and she knew that they knew it. It always took her the longest to pick up choreography and even when she got it, her moves were never as sharp or cool looking as any of the other girls. She hated being the worst at something because it made her stand out negatively. Being just okay was good enough for her although it never was for others. Being exceptional would be nice but risking being the worst wasn’t worth it. Yet here she was, the worst dancer out of nine girls. Their dances as AriaHex were much more difficult than anything in the music scene right now, their company claimed that this is what would make them a hit. But it was so fast and strange and sharp. While just doing the beginning transitions, Faye made a left instead of a right and her sudden attempt to fit the issue sent her over her own feet and she collided with another member. Now Faye and Kitty sat in a tangle on the ground with the dance coach scolding them.

“Sorry, sunbae. Yes, maybe a break would be best.” Faye averted gaze as she shuffled off of Kitty.

[kittyxah]

Ugh, how mortifying. Kitty was among the best dancers in the group, one thing that she was actually secure about in the dynamic, and knew Faye as someone to struggle but a fall like this had never occurred. She resisted the urge to rub her elbow that had made contact with the ground as she suspected it would seem rude. Like her, Faye was quiet and tried not to stir the pot too much. But at least she was beautiful, talented, could write music, and be in touch with her emotions and secure with her body; all things Kitty could never achieve. 

As they walked over to their bags for break, Kitty found herself next to Faye still. She didn’t look at her while talking, not wanting to seem too forwards. Even though it wasn’t her fault, she felt the need to apologize to the younger girl. 

“Um, sorry about that. I wasn’t paying attention.”

[kittyxah]

gajeongxah‌:

She couldn’t decide if the words were true or not, so she simply stood from the table. It was easier than addressing any real feelings right now. Gajeong liked to keep it real but her real wasn’t mushy and she didn’t really know how to handle that type. She had finished her food anyways. She brushed off her jeans and coughed. 

“Thanks for the dinner, Faye. It was good.” Gajeong took her plate and dropped it in the sink on her way to her bedroom, hoping none of her roommates would follow. 

“I’m leaving too.” Kitty had taken a single bite of one of her dumplings and hid the other in her hoodie pocket during the argument about their dynamic. She could already feel the one piece inside of her, slowly infecting her body with grease and fat. “Thank you, Faye.”

Kitty was glad Gajeong left so that it wasn’t as strange for her to leave. She didn’t plan to speak to Gajeong in their room when she returned. Hands in pockets, she shuffled away, not even putting her dish away. 

[kittyxah]

sakuraxah‌:

“I think Kitty should be allowed to do what she likes with her own body.” Sakura spoke up, finding an opportunity to show up Hyeyeon. No one liked her anyways, but at least now Sakura could contrast her nastiness with words of wisdom. She knew just what to say. 

“But, Kitty, please treat yourself well. We can’t tell you what to do, your decisions must be made on your own, but remember the importance of health when it comes to success. We say this because we care.” She didn’t care. Kitty could starve and die and Sakura wouldn’t shed a tear over it. But the success of her members ultimately meant her own success so Sakura did whatever she could to put them on the path.

Although she appreciated Sakura’s words, she was annoyed by the continuation of the topic. All the older girls were elegant and the younger girls cute and fresh, most of all, they were all skinny effortlessly. Kitty didn’t consider herself any of those things. She was the unfortunate middle ground, she wasn’t the best at anything and, in her mind, that meant she was the worst overall.

“Thanks but I’m not a child, Sakura. I understand. I just...I don’t know what you guys want me to say. Why can’t we just continue without talking about this?”

[kittyxah]

hyeyeonxah‌:

“Who cares what she does? I mean, we all know she’ll just be chucking it up at 2am anyways. What a waste that’ll be. Give it to someone who will actually use it.” Someone had to say it. It was the truth after all. Kitty had a problem, it did not use to walk around it. Hyeyeon was the type to speak her mind after all. And she didn’t want all the attention to be on the pitiful wisp of a thing in her group rather than herself. 

Kitty whirled her head to the girl next to her. Why did Hyeyeon always have to be such a bitch? Did she need attention that badly? She always seemed to think she could get away with anything because she was pretty. As much as Kitty was jealous of her beauty, she hated her attitude. The real waste was a pretty face paired with a mouth full of shit. Usually she let her comments slide but Kitty’s ears burned with embarrassment as the girls glanced at each other with varying levels of awkwardness. 

“Hey, no one asked you. Can’t you mind your own business?” Kitty shook her head. “I said I’m not hungry.”

[kittyxah]

fayexah‌:

The members of AriaHex all sat at the dinning room table. It was a rare occasion as they mostly tried to avoid each other. However, they were told that they could eat whatever they wish this weekend so Faye made dumplings for her members. It’d been two months since anyone bothered to cook for the group. They really all preferred to do their own thing. She felt a bit proud that the girls all accepted and complimented her on her cooking but when it came to Kitty, the serving plate was pushed away. Now was her second attempt to give her the food. Faye knew Kitty had some sort of eating disorder since she rarely ate and when she did, she could be spotted spitting it out. It worried her but she felt it was not her place to confront Kitty about it. It would remain the elephant in the room.

“Really, unnie? It’s very good, I promise. Just one won’t hurt. You have to be in good health for debut in just a few weeks.” Faye placed one small dumpling on the place in front of Kitty. 

“Please, Fayah.” Kitty almost whispered, looking down at her plate. The awkward clanging of dishes over the silence made Kitty realize that everyone was looking at her. Her stomach rumbled at the vision of the moist and steaming dumpling in front of her but her mind wouldn’t let her arms reach for it. She’d look like a pig, She turned to looked at Faye in the eyes.

“Thank you. But I’m not hungry at all.”

[kittyxah]

“No, really, I’m not hungry.” Faye’s attitude was probably the most like hers in the whole house and the one that Kitty felt closest too. Unfortunately, being like her meant that neither girl talked much and just remained polite background characters to the main story of other members like Rina or Sakura. The only difference was that Faye was already popular, she didn’t need to try and be noticed the way Kitty did. In some ways, Kitty envied that about her, as she envied many things about many people. Still, she appreciated that Faye had made jiaozi for the members tonight. As they all gathered around the table, Kitty felt awkward being the only one to refuse. She could tell what they could tell about her. They knew she struggled with eating, they saw her get thinner through the months, no one ever asked her about it. Kitty wasn’t even sure if they were actually concerned.