ECLAIR COOKIE GENERAL YANDERE HEADCANNONS.
requested by: @average-unpaid-therapist ! thank you for requesting ^^
warning! possible ooc bc well, he's very new, will add more when i'll finish writing lol
he's hot. he's smart. basically, he's got the looks and the brains, which is very attractive in itself!
so, overtime, he gets used to the fact that most of the museum visitors are really just here to admire him, rather than the ancient relics he collected.
(this one was at all you fucking simps /lh)
it gets tiring, it's true.
worst thing is that whenever eclair tries to explain a thing or two about this very interesting artifact, those people will just
stare at him. in a very lovey-dovey, and quite creepy way.
problem is, those cookies become so much more frequent, that he can't even properly run the museum, as they always chase him and stick to him—
your eyes shine bright with interest, as you read the cartel right next to an antique painting.
you don't necessarily look prettier than the average cookie— and yet, you still are captivating.
eclair can't help but go your way, eager to find out more about you.
note that at this point, it's not love or obsession or anything else— you just piqued his interest.
“are you interested by our collection, dear visitor?”
you jump because that bitch just scared the shit out of you lmfao
“ah, i apologize if i startled you. that was not my intention.”
“oh! no no— it's fine, don't worry! as for your question, then i must say— yes. absolutely!”
you then go on a five minute talk about how each part of the museum had you absolutely thrilled, and how you felt blessed because archeology and history were your two major interests, and now that this museum was here, you could find fellow nerds history fans!
“but i gotta say— my favorite part of the museum surely has to be the dragon fighter cookies exposition.”
interest 100. he's absolutely hooked now.
you?? a fellow dragon-fighter cookies enjoyer??
“yes! i agree, out of all the expositions here, the dragon-fighter one certainly is the richest one— perhaps because i spend a bit too much time on finding relics related to them.”
you laugh at his attempt at a joke, and then you keep the conversation going, which i will not retranscript as i have no idea what to write for it.
but let's just say that with each word you say, especially about his one biggest interest, eclair cookie is slowly being more and more charmed.
you seen the meme that goes "my way of flirting is stating scientific facts"? well, basically, this is you right now, and you don't even realize it.
speaking of your name— eclair needs to know it.
you know, because it's pretty rare to find other people who enjoy the dragon-fighter cookies' history as much as he does.
“pardon me for being so curious, but may i ask for your name?”
“only if you give me yours first~”
“of course— i am eclair cookie.”
he'll make sure to remember your name— and spoiler alert, he does.
after that day, eclair looks forward to seeing you as often as possible. he, unfortunately, can only rarely leave the museum, as he's clearly bound to this place— if he isn't here to keep it clean, then who will do it?
whenever you're not here, he'll either spend his time cleaning the museum or think about you while standing awkwardly in front of the painting where you two first met.
and it's kinda weird because imagine just visiting the museum and then you see the dude that's in charge of the place, just. standing.
and he'd do that for three hours each day.
but thinking isn't enough. thoughts are ephemeral, and even though he's smart, eclair, like any other cookie, forgets them by the end of the day.
so he starts to write them down as they come, in a notebook he hides somewhere inside his office.
eclair certainly wouldn't want you to learn about him writing pages and pages about his kind of obsessive thoughts about you, y'see
poor man doesn't realize it, but he's sinking into the abyss of obsession faster than the titanic 🗿
after roughly four notebooks filled to the brim with lovesick and obsessive notes about you only, eclair finally realizes that he may or may not be doing okay rn
naturally, he comes to the conclusion that he should seek help and find a healthy way to cope with his obsessive and intrusive thoughts
“surely, i must be in love with them..” yeah sounds more like it
he's not nervous when it comes to love, so right when he sees you, he just—
“ever since i met you, my heart has done nothing but ache when you weren't in the same room a me. and when it ached a bit too much for the first time... i realized i loved you.”
you're surprised. very surprised.
“i know, this is quite surprising considering the short amount of time we'd spent together, but— i truly love you, and i mean it.”
eclair will be very, very insistent about it, and he simply won't take no as an answer— even if you don't like him back at all. so congrats, you got yourself a cute boyfriend!
he'll become twice as obsessive as before, paying more attention to everything you do, like at what exact time you get in the museum, what you prefer to wear on which day, how you eat your start jellies— how do you not notice the way he's constantly scribbling down things in this little notebook of his?
i mean, yeah huh you did actually notice— but hey, he's actually just.
writing down hum. work related stuff! no need to worry hahaha...
dating eclair will be nice and all, until at some point— you'll constantly feel smothered in his presence.
turn your head around and that dude will follow your stare. it's creepy.
he can sometimes make strange remarks, like “but you usually don't wear that on a monday...” “well, [y/n], you are three minutes and forty seconds late. do i need to come to your home and kidnap you so you'll always be early??... why the scared face? my sweetheart, you know i would never actually do that! i was just making a light-hearted joke!”
when he's not being creepy with simple words, he'll ask you very strange questions.
“my dearest, what were you doing before coming to the museum?” “opinion on [very specific art movement that happened decades ago and that you've never heard of before]?” “if i asked you who your favorite person was, you'd answer me, naturally..?”
note that if you actually answer with someone else on the last one, hum. bad things may happen to said someone.
eclair wants to know everything about you, just like he wants to know everything about each relic he has in his museum.
you're like a relic. precious, rare, and god, he wants to observe you and keep you forever and ever.
so hum, remember when i said that you'll have to say yes to his confession, whether you like him or not?
this. this right here has consequences. such as you wanting to break up with him after like two weeks or even less.
also the fact he barely trusts you with other cookies. eclair can't stand seeing you chat with someone that isn't him and will interrupt your convo asap.
anyways. you want to break up with him? oki doki.
you'll just possibly get kidnapped and trapped into his office. and no one is allowed in there, apart from him.
“please, don't be mad, darling. and understand that those are only the consequences of your actions. have you not decided to 'break up' with me, we certainly wouldn't be here today.”
might or might not trap you into a glass box like the other relics so he can look at you without you running away.
the reason why eclair advises the visitors not to come at night is because during that time, your screams are the loudest— and it might raise suspicions. that or rumors about the museum being haunted might pop up. and that last one isn't stonks.
if you're not breaking up with him at some point, you certainly aren't safe from kidnapping.
if eclair notices that you're being a bit too distant for his liking, you're getting kidnapped.
“i've noticed you've been avoiding me a lot... are you seeing someone else?”
“huh? what're you talking about?? i would never do that, eclair! you know very well i only love you!”
“... i see. well, i apologize for doubting you, my love. here, take my cup of coffee, as an apology— no, no. i insist, really.”
'ayo dude that shit tastes wei-' bam on the ground
it's simple and effective, try it on your own! (don't actually please)
so, yeah. eclair cookie is a very obsessive one, as well as kinda controlling on some extent? he doesn't want you to hang out with people he deems to be bad, which is basically almost everybody. lmfao
ah yes eclair cookie aka the man that wasn't even out and i already got a request for him. i actually love him sm weewee.