Living Leadership

Life and Leadership, Management and Motherhood - Bringing it all Together

[kmwoodman]

5 Awesome Reasons for Leaders to get Dirty

  The Cleanliness Priority

I have a tendency to be obsessive compulsive.  Not in a debilitating way, but in a cleanliness way.

I wash my hands.  A lot.  I own way too much hand sanitizer.  Boxes of wipes are in every car and most rooms of the house.  As someone that talks a lot with her hands, it’s definitely a necessity to keep them clean.

I share this so you appreciate just how much the idea of getting dirty is “not me.”

Yet I love to go four wheeling on my ATV.  I get splattered with mud and caked with dirt.  I become Pig Pen, with a dust cloud out behind me, and have to take two showers to get all the grime off of me.  And yet I think it’s totally worth it.

When I ride, it gives me the same thrill my work does.

If you’ve figured out what I do for a living over the last three years, you should win a prize.  It took me two decades to figure it out, and friends and family are still at a loss.

I have worked in numerous industries, in a variety of roles.  Ultimately, what they all have in common is that leaders ask me to build or transform things.  I am a change leader.

  True Change is Messy

Change leadership is not for the faint of heart.  You have to be willing to kick up a lot of dust, get splattered with the occasional mud when you bomb down unfamiliar terrain, and enjoy the bumps and bruises along the way. The result is an adrenaline kick that can last for months and years.  A roller coaster ride of ups and downs, with the occasional spill.

For the most adventurous, it requires just the right kind of support.  Executives who can be your safety net when you fall down and need time to right yourself.  Until you can get going again.

Change leadership – whether it’s building a new company, team, product or service – is about the transformation of what is, to what can be.  It is very similar to the best kind of four wheeling.  Roll-cage, five point harness, hair-on-fire four wheeling.

Change Leadership is about the transformation of what is, to what can be.

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So why should leaders consider getting dirty?  To taking those lesser traveled roads, with all the risks associated with them?

1.  Transformation is not possible by staying on paved roads. 

To transform a business – or ourselves – we must be willing to leave familiar landmarks for unchartered terrain.

2.  We will meet great people, eager to take risks along side us. 

They are not content to wait for the road to be paved and will help us forge a new path.

3.  Dirty hands remind us of our stake in our journey and accomplishments. 

It is evidence of the hard road we have taken.

4.  Treasure can only be found at the end of the road less traveled. 

Let others be content with what they find on the easy path.  The risky path yields great rewards.

5.  When we look back on our lives, we will know we’ve seen and done things like no other. 

We will know our our presence made a difference to those that came after.

  Do you enjoy taking the road less traveled, to transform what is into what’s possible?  What advice do you have for those considering the leap?  I’d love if you could share your thoughts in the comments and keep the conversation going.

  5 Awesome Reasons for Leaders to get Dirty was originally published on LIVING LEADERSHIP

[kmwoodman]

Is your feedback a bump in the dark night?

It was late at night, her book bathing the room in a blue glow.  A knock sounds out, loudly.  She screams and hears footsteps run away, quickly into the night.

  No, this isn’t the start of some side gig writing novels.  It’s my real-life Sunday night adventure.

  The Potential Thief

I was reading, enjoying some rare quiet.  The little one was in bed and my husband was on an overnight trip.  Our porch lights were off, but the drapes open so someone could see me sitting alone in the dim light.

When the knock came, I yelled something less than intelligent (something like OMG or WTH), my heart going crazy in my chest.  The unknown knocker ran off into the dark night with me in a panic.

I immediately flipped on all the lights, checked the porch and then shut all the drapes.  I double-checked the bolts on all the doors and I called the police.

I thought it was someone casing homes over the holiday weekend to see if we were really home.  The police responded immediately, circling the block a few minutes later.

After my heart rate decreased a few notches, I attempted to get some rest.  However, I realized after a few minutes that something was gnawing at me. I ran back downstairs and checked the garage.  Sure enough, the door was wide open.  The kiddo had opened it while he was outside playing and I didn’t think to check.

  The Helpful Neighbor

Suddenly, I was convinced the visitor was a concerned neighbor, planning to let me know my garage was open.  And I had yelled, scaring the poor soul away.  I called the police too.  I’m an awesome neighbor <insert sarcasm here>.

While the neighbor had good intentions, I wasn’t open to receiving the message.  There were several reasons:

The approach was quiet.  I had no warning until someone was in my space.

The knock was loud and jarring, triggering my flight or fight response.

While this is one of the safest communities in the safest state, I have lived and worked in New York, Amsterdam, Atlanta, Phoenix…places where I did not feel as safe.  I went into that mode of thinking before rational thought could enter.

What could my neighbor have done to make it easier for me to receive his or her message?  It was at night…my house was dark.  Were there alternatives?

Yes.  He or she could have called out from a safe distance.  Even a “Sir…Ma’am?  Is someone home?  Your garage is open.” from the street would have worked.

With warning, I could have gotten up, turned the lights on, and considered the feedback as it was intended.  Rather than a threat, I would have realized the message was to my benefit.

  A Lesson in Feedback

As leaders, sometimes we are the ones approaching a house in the dark, an unsuspecting someone inside.  When presenting feedback, we need to be mindful of what we can control, and what we can’t.  Otherwise, the feedback may be seen as a threat, rather than the gift it is.

  What we cannot control

No matter what we do, we cannot change prior experiences of our employees in receiving feedback.

Former managers may have demonstrated behaviors that resulted in fear and dread in subsequent interactions.  Late Friday meetings may have resulted in pink slips at another company.  The possibilities are endless.

Without consideration, we may unwittingly trigger flight or fight responses in our teams, before we even walk through the door to communicate feedback.

  What we can control

Preparation – What do we know about this individual?  Does he or she assume feedback equals failure?  That it is an opportunity to improve?  Know the person well enough to understand his or her receptiveness to feedback.

Timing – Be consistent regarding feedback discussions.  If something comes up that needs to be addressed immediately, then address it immediately.  Delays build fear and angst, shutting down listening channels.

Approach – Frame the feedback in the spirit it is intended, a gift to help grow, improve, or prepare for the next level.  The individual may need to be reminded of the positive aspects of his or her performance first, along with what could be done differently.

Body Language, Volume and Tone – Non-threatening delivery should go without saying.  However, whatever we are thinking tends to come out in conversation, even if it isn’t in our words.  Any negative/frustrated thought toward the individual or circumstance needs to be purged in advance.  Writing it down may be helpful <queue shredder>.

  I did not expect a lesson in feedback when I got a knock on the door in the middle of the night.  Sometimes, however, beautiful things can emerge from our fears…if we can look beyond the emotion to the lessons on the other side.

  Do you have other areas of focus when preparing for a feedback discussion?  What would you recommend?  I’d love if you could share your thoughts in the feedback and keep the conversation going.

Is your feedback a bump in the dark night? was originally published on Kristin M Woodman

[kmwoodman]

Develop Better Ideas than Tony Stark in 7 Steps

Ideas are cheap.  Before we begin investing time and resources moving forward with one, it’s free to change or refine it.  Potential is endless in the world of ideas.

Potential is endless in the world of ideas.

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While opportunities abound, not all ideas are good ones.  Just ask Tony Stark.  In the latest Avengers movie, one of his ideas nearly causes the Earth’s destruction.  Oops.

Most of our ideas don’t risk the world as we know it.  However, we could jeopardize a project, customer relationship, or business.

An effective vetting process allows us to identify and mitigate risks during ideation, before they become reality in execution.  Let’s evaluate Tony’s vetting process for the Ultron program to determine what we can do differently in our own ideation.

Self-Evaluation

Tony’s first step is to vet the idea internally. This is something we all do, formally or informally.  We address initial doubts or misgivings, maybe poke at the idea to see if it passes a sniff test.

For many of us, ideas die in this step due to fear of embarrassment, cost, complexity, or other perceived limitations.   However, given the size of his bank account and ego, such fears have no bearing in Tony’s decision-making.  He has no natural internal limits, even on far-fetched ideas.

Since Tony’s an established genius, his internal vetting would be considerable and thorough.  However, we each see things from our own perspective, with our own biases.  Which is why we, and Tony, cannot stop there.

  Peer-Evaluation

The next step is to share the idea with others, putting words to the mental image of our idea.  In verbalizing it, we may immediately find gaps or challenges.  Even when we are internally thorough, the process of translating the idea into words helps solidify or clarify that which was vague or uncertain.

Translating an idea into words helps solidify or clarify that which was vague or uncertain.

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Tony’s sounding board is Bruce Banner, the alter-ego of the Hulk.  Bruce is a fellow scientist and genius, able to quickly grasp Tony’s idea.  He can see the value in the Ultron program, but also huge risks, which he verbalizes.

Tony is quick to refute and diminish Bruce’s concerns.  He sways Bruce and they move forward together.  At this point, Bruce plays his true role, filling in technical gaps and challenges that Tony could not address alone.  They succeed in building Ultron, which quickly becomes a nightmare.

Where did Tony go wrong?  While Tony verbalized his idea, his mistake was in using only one sounding board and who he selected to fill that role.

Tony and Bruce have an affinity as scientists, meaning it is similar to Tony talking to himself.  Bruce offered no new concerns to the ones Tony considered and dismissed as insignificant, relative to the greater good of the Ultron program.

Personalities are the key difference between the two men.  Due to the risks associated with his anger (hello green guy), Bruce does not challenge the way Tony does.  It is relatively easy for Tony to get what he wants, and is another reason why this particular peer review was insufficient.

  360° Review

Tony’s critical gap was the lack of a 360° review in his vetting process.

He is part of a team – the Avengers.  Each of them bring different perspectives to the table, balancing the natural affinity he shares with Bruce, as well as offering personalities that are more difficult to intimidate.

In particular, Tony had a complete miss when he failed to engage Steve Rodgers, his polar opposite.

While Tony wants to help people, he trusts technology and science to do the best job of making their lives safer.  He and Bruce both feel more comfortable around gizmos and gadgets than people.

Steve is a soldier first, here to protect mankind from aliens, technology run amok or even himself.  He is exactly the foil Tony needs to fully vet his idea, ensuring the true risks are voiced and addressed prior to moving forward.

While it is easier to be surrounded by advocates, challengers provide us with the opposing point of view we need to prevent the Earth’s destruction.  Or maybe some less dramatic failure or loss.

Challengers provide us with the opposing point of view we need to prevent disaster.

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  Ideation to Execution

Eventually, the good guys won…after much angst and destruction.  In real life, the impact may be less dramatic, but negative nonetheless.  And we may not emerge victorious.

In order to increase the likelihood that our ideas are feasible, achievable and worth pursuing, there are 7 steps we can all follow:

  Have an idea.  Use that gray matter to come up with something new.  Even “small” ideas can have a big impact, so grab on to those nuggets of inspiration when they happen.

Engage in self-talk.  Consider positives and negatives, potential holes and gaps.  Do not let doubt squash the idea if it appears to have merit.  Is it possible?  Does it have value?  If so, keep going.

Write the idea down.  We frequently need to put pen to paper to make our thoughts coherent.  Does the idea still hold up under visual scrutiny?  Drawing a picture brings a mental image to life and may be more appropriate than words.

Talk to an advocate.  Reach out to a trusted friend or colleague, maybe someone in a similar field or role.  Sharing the idea with a supportive, constructive ear will help address gaps and smooth the rough edges.

Seek out the opinion of challengers.  Advocates make us feel good, but challengers make us think better.  Look for those with different perspectives to identify blind spots and missed risks.  Include someone who knows the customer base, has technical ability we lack, or is an expert in unfamiliar territory.

Make the pitch.  Once the idea is refined, present it to people that can make it happen.  It could be a bank for funding, a manager for resources, or someone that sponsors creative talents.  Just remember, “no” may mean going back to an earlier step for further refinement.  Anything worth doing may take a few iterations to get to “YES.”

Get ‘er done!  Don’t stop now…it’s time to make that idea a reality!

  Tony Stark may be a genius, but even the smartest of us can benefit from vetting our ideas before making them a reality.  What steps do you follow between ideation and execution?  What would you do differently?  I’d love if you could share your thoughts in the comments and keep the conversation going. 

For more information about big ideas and making them happen, check out 1900 Hours in my book: 24 Hours of Life and Leadership, the Marine Corps Way.

Develop Better Ideas than Tony Stark in 7 Steps was originally published on Kristin M Woodman

[kmwoodman]

Managing People Frustrations (Part III)

This is the last of a three-part series regarding the most common advice I provide in response to people frustrations.  In all cases, I have found that people frustrations can be resolved by focusing on Communication and Compassion.

The first challenge was focused on email, and I offered the “1-2-Meet” approach to improving response rates and engagement.

The next challenge was about reconciling differences of opinion, using the “Find the AND” approach.

What if the “1-2-Meet” or “Find the AND” approaches don’t seem to fit and we’re still frustrated? I have one last piece of people advice.  If we find ourselves getting frustrated, we just need to remember one universal truth…

  It’s not about you

We each live every moment in our own skin, within our own minds.  It’s easy to get caught up in our thoughts and ideas, efforts and convictions.

Then another person comes along that is caught up in their own life, thoughts, and ideas.   How often do we find ourselves getting frustrated by those individuals and their questions, actions, or inactions?

A few jobs ago, I had a manager with a struggling performer on her team.  She was not getting the results she expected and was frustrated by the lack of progress in spite of regular coaching.

In our conversations, I could hear just how fed up she was.  During one, I asked a simple question.  “Do you think she wakes up every day to make your life miserable?”

That pulled her up short.  “Of course not” she replied.  “Then why don’t you ask her what’s going on?  Why not get her perspective on why she’s struggling?”

I won’t share the particular struggles the young woman was experiencing, just that they were the root of her challenges.  The manager’s perspective shifted and her frustrations with the individual did as well.  She only wished she had known sooner what was going on so she could help.

She asked me if I knew.  I told her no, I didn’t.  What I did know was the answer was never going to be about the manager or me.  The answer was only going to be about that person.

We each come at every interaction from our own experience and perception.  It is rare that any of us goes out of our way to frustrate those around us.  Instead, we each come at things the best way we know how given where we are.

The key is to remember that it’s not about us.

Each person’s ideas, behavior, performance, or course of action is what they know to put forward in that moment.  All based on the information they have, prior experience, or modeled behaviors.

We need to ASK, or at least consider, where the other person is coming from.  If you find yourself getting frustrated and are not sure what do to – remember that it’s not about you, but don’t make it about them.

Sometimes asking is the very prompt someone needs to share the unshareable.  They need to know someone cares.  That they want to know.  

If we’re in the business of leading people, it’s our business to know and care about them.

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  What is the best advice you have received about managing people frustrations?  Are there others you would add to this list?  I would love if you could add your thoughts to the comments and keep the conversation going.

Managing People Frustrations (Part III) was originally published on Kristin M Woodman

[kmwoodman]

Managing People Frustrations (Part II)

Recently, I shared that the most common types of advice I’m asked to provide tend to focus on people frustrations.  And that the root cause, and therefore any solutions, center around Communication and Compassion.

The first challenge was focused on email, and I offered the “1-2-Meet” approach to improving response rates and engagement.

The next challenge is about reconciling differences of opinion.  What can we do when we’re convinced of the right way forward, or the right answer, and someone else is convinced otherwise?

  Find the AND

Let’s start from the premise that we all want to wake up every day, knowing we add value to an organization or effort.

To know we add value, we have to understand our role and its relationship to the mission of the team, organization or company.

In our attempts to find, realize, or maximize our value, sometimes we may forget that everyone around us is doing the same thing.  Each of us can get so caught up in “me” that the potential awesomeness of “we” is lost. 

Each of us can get so caught up in ME that the potential awesomeness of WE is lost.

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Recently, one of my managers – I’ll call him Bob – sent out an email regarding something his team was working on.  Another manager – Joe – reached out to me, indicating that he was confused.  The effort appeared to overlap with his team’s responsibilities and he wondered what that meant.

Did I really need to get in the middle of two people to translate?  Not unless I wanted to own the outcome.  Since I didn’t, I asked them to meet and work it out.

A few days later, I get the word that Bob and Joe could not resolve their difference of opinion.  They were each dug into their understanding of individual accountabilities, teams, and objectives, unable to reconcile their positions.

The question I got back was “which one of us is right?”

I reached out to both and asked them forget for a moment that either Bob OR Joe could be right.  Instead, I asked them to find the solution where Bob AND Joe are both right.

By shifting the focus from “me” to “we,” the result was a better understanding of one another’s teams and objectives.  They could each view the other from a place of compassion, rather than possible resentment.

The AND solution ultimately highlighted the synergies between the teams.  They realized that by working together, they created a better solution for our customers than they could alone.

OR solutions are polarized, siloed, and divided.  AND solutions are partnerships, synergies, and aligned.  It is only through AND that individuals and teams can find common ground and the best blend of multiple ideas or positions.

The next time we’re faced with which solution or answer is the “right” one, let’s look past “me” to the awesomeness of “we.”

  What is the best advice you have received to reconcile differences of opinion?  Is there another technique you would recommend?  I would love if you could add your thoughts to the comments and keep the conversation going.

Managing People Frustrations (Part II) was originally published on Kristin M Woodman

[kmwoodman]

Managing People Frustrations (Part I)

I spend most of my day doing two things – story-telling and advising. I’ll leave story-telling, or “Death by PowerPoint,” for another day.

While much of the advising I do ends up involving story-telling, what has fascinated me recently is how similar the requests for advice are…regardless of who is making them.

While we all have plenty to do, and normally not enough time or resources to get it done, job-based concerns tend to be the most straight-forward.  What is not as straight-forward are people-based concerns, which may require assistance to resolve.

When I am approached for advice, people-based challenges tend to be the most common, highlighting frustrations of one kind or another.  The good news is, the challenges have common themes:  communication and compassion.

Communication challenges can point to method or message. Are we using the right medium? Are we considering how our message may be received? While there is no tone in email, is there implied tone due to how the message has been framed?

Compassion, on the other-hand, is appreciating the position or circumstance of the other person.  When communication and compassion challenges are both present, frustrations run high on both sides, standing in the way of getting our jobs done and eroding relationships.

There are three key pieces of advice that I tend to fall back on whenever I hear the words “I frustrated with <insert name/team here>.” The first, and focus of this week, is all about that pesky thing called email.

1-2-Meet

Email is the communications tool of choice in most organizations.  Over time, all of us have had one or more of our emails ignored. Sometimes, even a follow-up note doesn’t do the trick. Heck, I have no doubt a few folks have tried to engage me via email to no avail.

While it’s easy to think that the other person is ignoring us, compassion forces us to consider there may be other reasons for the lack of response.  

Lead with compassion – making time for consideration before reaction.

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We are often bombarded by email, attempting to balance timely response and/or action with deadlines, deliverables and endless meetings. As a result, the items at the top of our list may end up getting more attention than something we scanned during a busy time and promptly forgot about.

Rather than assume our messages are being ignored, start from the premise that everyone is busy.  Consider, before sending the first email, do we need a response to move forward?

Assuming we need a response, and email is the most appropriate medium (vs a meeting or other face-to-face discussion), use the 1-2-Meet approach for those communications that are most important.

  1.  First Email

Send the first email, ensuring it is clear what type of communication this represents (action required, update, FYI, etc). Important messages, such as those requiring an action, should be crisp, clear and stand alone (do not embed a critical message in an update). Actions needed and any specific deadlines should stand out, such as bolding a due date.

Appropriately framing our first message, with clear expectations of any needed response and timeframe, increases the likelihood we will receive the response we require.

  2.  Second Email

If the original email requires an action or response, and it is not received, send a second email. This will get it back to the top of the email queue, in case the original note was scanned and forgotten during a busy time.

Sending a note at the end of a day or week helps get an email to the top of the queue.  Whether the individual checks email in the evenings/weekends, or waits until the following work day, the email will be one of the first received.

Remember to give the person the benefit of the doubt that the message was lost in a sea of activity, not ignored.  This will help guide the tone of the follow-up.

  3.  Meeting

If two emails do not receive a response, it’s time for a meeting. Schedule a short meeting (15-30 minutes) on the person’s calendar, referencing the email. Offer the ability to meet with a delegate or at a different time that is more convenient.

A meeting forces the individual to attend to the action that has been requested, whether it’s direction, resources, etc. To avoid the meeting, they can respond to the earlier note(s). If what the person really needs is time to focus on the request, then attending the meeting addresses that need.

  One thing to avoid is sending endless emails, expecting an eventual response.  Frustration will go up on both sides.  By sending two, before scheduling a meeting, the individual is offered the benefit of the doubt that the first message was lost in the shuffle, with its importance highlighted with the meeting request.

If the same individual consistency requires the 1-2-Meet approach, then bypass the emails and schedule a meeting the first time.  We have so many ways to communicate, and not all of them are appropriate for every purpose and every person.  It’s important to use the method that works best in each situation.

  What are your thoughts on the 1-2-Meet approach?  Do you use a different method?  I would love for you to share your experience in the comments and keep the conversation going.

Managing People Frustrations (Part I) was originally published on Kristin M Woodman

[kmwoodman]

Leadership – Five Tips for the Ultimate Endurance Sport

I’m not the best at exercising. Whoever made up that endorphin myth can keep it. I have worked out for hours and the only result was sweat and energy drain…not some magical happy place.

When it comes to leading, however, it’s the complete opposite. The harder a challenge, the more energy I have for it. I also get more energy and satisfaction once the challenge is resolved.

In spite of my general distaste for exercise, I know I need it for the health of my mind and body (more on that later). If I don’t take care of myself, I won’t be able to solve those fun work challenges that I love. So, endorphins or not, I’ve got to do something. That something is biking. I used to spin regularly and got away from it. In the last 18 months, my father has been cycling and just finished his second century ride (100 miles). Biking is a way for both of us to stay healthy, and if that includes vacationing and riding together, I’m all for it.

During the past few months, as I have readied myself for longer and longer endurance rides, I have learned a lot about biking. Since I have plenty of time to think while I’m on the bike, I can’t help but compare this journey to the other journeys we take, in work and life.

  If it’s not uncomfortable and you aren’t falling down occasionally, you’re not trying hard enough

As leaders, if we’re not learning and growing, we will quickly lose our effectiveness. Any time we try something new, there’s a risk of falling down and/or being uncomfortable. The key is to get back up and work through the discomfort until the role, skill, etc feels like a relatively good fit.

Last weekend was the first time I used clip-in shoes outdoors. I made sure I practiced getting in and out before my first ride. I fell twice, scaring myself to death and receiving a misshapen and discolored leg in the process. I had a good cry, made sure nothing was broken, practiced a few more times, and then rode for a personal best average of 14mph.

If you aren’t falling down occasionally, you’re not trying hard enough.

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  The more you work, the better you get and the more you can take

New skills, roles and projects make leaders stretch and strain. Over time, we can go further and farther with what seems like less effort. If it feels too easy, we are ready for bigger climbs and longer distances. The result is a cycle of challenge, discomfort, growth/skill development, and new challenge.

Discomfort is a temporary step in our growth and development.

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  Manage the friction

If there’s no friction, there’s no forward movement. If there’s too much in the wrong areas, pain or malfunction will keep us from moving for a while. Change can be difficult and there may be natural resistance within and/or around us. We need to do what we can to smooth the way, knowing that some friction will remain or we can’t make progress.

We need enough friction to make progress, but not so much that we stop moving.

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  Plan for the duration and complexity

Life is a marathon, not a sprint. We need to make sure we always have a little bit in the tank for when we need it. If we sprint up the first big hill we see, what will we do when there’s a bigger one on the other side? And another one?

We need to look at the landscape ahead for ourselves and our teams, anticipating the best path forward. We will have greater success if we are able to take advantage of slow periods to create momentum going into tougher times that lay beyond. Otherwise, we spend our time reacting and recovering, making those tougher times even more challenging.

Leave a little in the tank for the unexpected.

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  Take care of your mind and body or you’ll bonk

While this may seem obvious in biking, it is true in leadership and life as well. We need to have energy, hydration, and oxygen for our minds and bodies to function at top form. We make better decisions when we are rested, fed, and moving around.

As leaders, we may eat on the run and ignore the needs of our body, putting real strain on our brain as a result. It is much more difficult to recover once we’ve bonked (energy crash on a bike) than to take care of ourselves along the way.

This last lesson is one I continue to struggle with and will revisit in a later post. Having bonked about 9 miles from home in my last outdoor adventure (44 miles), it was much more painful that it needed to be. Bonking in life has a much greater impact and takes even longer to recover…as I’m finding out.

Feed your body.  Feed your mind.  Else, lose your body.  Lose your mind.

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  Do any of these lessons resonate with your journey? Do you have others you would offer? I would love if you could share your experience in the comments and keep the conversation going.

Leadership – Five Tips for the Ultimate Endurance Sport was originally published on Kristin M Woodman

[kmwoodman]

Boss vs Leader - Perspective at Ages 7 and 41

Before I learned about leading, I was a little boss(y).

Recently, my son told me that he’s the boss of a small group of friends.

I suggested that he was the leader, not the boss.  That at work, even though I’m what he would consider to be “in charge,” I think of myself as the leader, not the boss.

“What does that mean?”

So I laid out the differences between leading and bossing.  Leaders ensure their teams have a say in how things move forward.  That they are encouraged to participate and make solutions their own.

In his vernacular, “They get to help decide what games you play and how you play them.  They don’t just do what you tell them to do.” Bosses, on the other hand, decide what needs to be done and often how to do it.  They give orders, rather than suggestions.  They point and expect their people to do.

“Bosses decide on the games and the rules and expect everyone else to play the way they want to.”

At 7, though I hoped for better, I was not surprised when my son said “Then I am the boss.  I tell them what to do and they do it.  I like that better.”

And when I was younger, I would have thought so too.  Working for the Marine Corps as a civilian, however, forced me to learn how to encourage rather than order.

As a manager of Marines, I could have used orders and considered it my right.  My team would have followed them – it was part of the culture.  However, I did not wear a uniform and thought that would be inappropriate in that environment.

It would have fostered resentment, not respect.

Instead, I had to build the trust of my team.  Work side by side with them, establishing my credibility and letting them make mistakes where I could.  If I felt strongly that we could not afford to go down a particular path, I shared my reasoning and helped them see my perspective.

I led.  I did not boss.

Years away from the Marine Corps, there are some crazy, hectic days when I think it would be faster and easier if we could just tell folks what to do.  And it would be, in the short-term.

But that does not develop leaders.  That develops followers.  And damn if we don’t need more leaders.

While I clearly have more work to do with my 7 year old, I am hopeful.  He will learn what I can already see – his friends would be happy to follow him if he was not so determined they do so.  He has a natural confidence that inspires others to follow, if only he would turn it down a notch.

I have some time.  Not much – it will fly by and he will be working with the mindset developed over the intervening years before I know it.  But I am determined.

Determined he know the difference.  That he can sit in front of a hiring manager some day and articulate the right reasons he should be responsible for others.  That he not say “because I finally want to be the one in charge” as I have had an aspiring manager say to me.

That he know the difference and embrace being a leader.  Anyone can use position and power to be a boss.  It takes a different brand to lead.

  Do you spend time with children, either as a family member or mentor?  What are your thoughts on teaching them the difference between bossing and leading?  I’d love if you could share your experience in the comments and keep the conversation going.

Boss vs Leader – Perspective at Ages 7 and 41 was originally published on LIVING LEADERSHIP

[kmwoodman]

The Art of Change

I have often joked that when other children were hearing stories of fairy tales, I was learning about the battle strategies of Sun Tzu.  While it does present an amusing visual, it is not that far from the truth.

Sun Tzu’s “The Art of War” is well over 2,000 years old and is still as relevant now as when it was first written.  The key to its success is that the author wrote it with enough specifics to be followed, but general enough to be applied in a variety of situations.

Whether we are trying to gain the support of an idea, affect an organizational transformation, or just move a team forward to achieve an objective, Sun Tzu’s ideas remain relevant. It is up to each of us to determine HOW to best interpret and implement Sun Tzu’s concepts given our situation.  Tactics for one situation will need to be different in another.  That is one of Tzu’s lessons:  when conditions change, you need to start over and reevaluate.

Even if the people are the same, the organization may not be.

If the people and organization are the same, the process may not be.

At the start of any potential change – receiving a new assignment or objective, launching a new product or project – be mindful of five steps to help ensure your path to victory.  They can also be thought of as the Art of Change.

1.       Know when to fight and when not to fight

Change is the only constant.  If we resist, we can quickly find ourselves labeled as someone who is not a team player.  At the same time, not all change should be allowed to sweep us along.

Going into change with open eyes and awareness is the only way to confront the challenges or embrace the opportunities that come with it.

2.      Obtain whole hearted support of the troops

Each member of a team has to follow their own journey through change.  Their leader must reconfirm support to move forward successfully.  That support cannot be taken for granted, as people are fundamental to any success.

The team may need reassurance or more information to solidify their footing as this change moves forward.  Unless their footing is firm, their leader’s cannot be.

3.      Be well prepared to seize favorable opportunities

Has the change created a new condition that can benefit the team or organization?  Are skilled resources going to be available?  Is a new technology available now that wasn’t before?  Jump in.

Has a previously favorable condition gone away?  Have resources been diverted to another effort?  Has support diminished because a key stakeholder was realigned to a new organization?  Reconsider.

4.      Be free from interference

Ideally, we all work for someone that lets us be the type of independent leaders we desire.  Even if we have such freedom, when our condition changes, our manager’s position may as well.  We cannot count on remaining autonomous.

If our position is not as flexible as we desire, maybe the change creates a condition where we can be more independent.  Take advantage.

5.      Take the enemy unprepared

There is no certainty, only opportunity.  Be the first to jump on new ideas and opportunities as they arise.  While everyone else is figuring out what a change means, drive forward and demonstrate capability, flexibility, and ability to move forward in absence of complete information.

In this context, the enemy may not be a person, but could be each of us…standing in the way of our success.  Being prepared for change, ready to embrace it and all the opportunity it represents, allows us to move forward with purpose instead of uncertainty.

  Have you read Sun Tsu’s Art of War?  What other keys to finding a successful path through change would you recommend?  Please share your thoughts in the comments and keep the conversation going.

  photo credit: kainet via photopin cc

The Art of Change was originally published on LIVING LEADERSHIP

[kmwoodman]

Successful Governance is a Highway

Over the years, I have spent a lot of time focused on developing new processes and governance for organizations.  No matter what the expected outcomes, I have found the same general approach and key elements to rule the day.

When I’m asked to explain my approach to much in work or life, I tend to use analogies.  Few of my family and friends (with some rare exceptions) understand what I do for a living.  Relating the conceptual to tangible things they are familiar with is easier for both of us.

I have found, like life, successful governance is a highway. Destination

Imagine you’re in a car and you want to be somewhere other than where you are.  Where do you start?

You have to have an idea of where you want to go in order to get there.  Just saying “I don’t want to be here” is not enough.  An awareness of the destination you have in mind will get you started…either North, South, East or West.

More refinement requires specifics, but to get going, it’s enough to have a general idea in mind.

In governance, this is a Vision.  A sense of the end state we want to achieve.  It doesn’t have to be specific, but for everyone to head towards some common understanding and process, there needs to be an idea of what success looks like.

This will be our “true north” and keep all the work we do in general alignment, even if we make adjustments over time.

  Jersey Barriers

Now that you’ve picked a general destination and started moving forward, you have to navigate within some number of lanes.  You can go fast or slow, get behind someone walking their car, or even occasionally break the rules a little by passing on the right.

What you can’t do is break through the jersey barriers on the outer edges of the road, at least not without significant damage and cost.  They keep all drivers within a confined space, heading in the same direction with a defined amount of flexibility in how they navigate within that space.

These “bumpers” are the outer limits we can afford to accept in governance.  What do we have to ensure and “lock” for the process to work?

You want to give enough flexibility to allow teams to execute on their commitments and feel like they are able to run their business.  However, acceptable limits should be understood and it should be painful and costly not to stay within them.

  The Fast Lane

Everyone is now going in the same direction, within specified limits, with room to maneuver at their own speed, whether they choose the flash Ferrari or economy of a Toyota to run their team.

It’s time to start introducing the processes and parameters needed to refine the governance model to its eventual maturity level.

If you are familiar with EZ-Pass, it allows a driver to pay a toll without having to stop and pay an attendant.  In our part of the country, we recently upgraded one of our tolls so that two lanes on the left can go through the tolls at full speed.  Others continue to navigate through the toll gates based on their choices.

In governance, it’s critical to identify the types of conditions and decisions that allow teams to blow through the process without slowing down.  As long as the teams are operating within those conditions, they can make commitments and deliver on them with no burdensome process to weigh them down.

If every part of the process is a challenge, it won’t be followed.  Make it easy to get through for a good number of teams/efforts, so that when it matters you can institute…

  The Toll Gate

Those teams that need to do or try something different, or have a need that has been identified as “toll-worthy,” must take an alternate path.

On the road, it takes a moment to stop and pay the toll.  It’s not intended to prevent you from moving forward, but it does make you hesitate.

In governance, we need to be able to introduce an operational pause for certain types of efforts, decisions, etc.  We don’t want to delay work, but we need the opportunity to evaluate the effort against pre-defined considerations.

What if two teams want to do similar work?  We may have the opportunity to align their efforts and save money.  What if we expected to spend x on an effort and now we’re spending twice as much?  We may want to evaluate whether the effort is still worth pursuing.

Such decisions can only be made if we introduce a pause in the process.

  Rules of the Road

The highway is generally a smooth running operation.  Drivers understand the rules and expected behaviors.  Some follow those rules and behaviors, others bend or break them, causing accidents and traffic jams.

Whether they like them or not, drivers understands the purpose and value of the rules.  Ultimately, if everyone was allowed to do whatever they want, whenever they want, there would be chaos and no one would get anywhere.

The same is true of governance.  It is only through understanding the value of each component above, the role everyone plays, the expected timing and need to keep things quick and light (so we don’t have traffic jams), that we can get full participation and a workable model.

Otherwise, it’s complete chaos.

  Have you introduced governance in a team or organization?  What other components do you find to be valuable?  I’d appreciate if you could add your comments below and keep the conversation going.

  photo credit: an.yonghua via photopin cc

Successful Governance is a Highway was originally published on LIVING LEADERSHIP

[kmwoodman]

5 Things I’ve Learned During 20 Years of Uncertainty

Image courtesy of Dreamstime Images

Over the summer, I marked the anniversary of “the beginning” – as I like to think of it.  The beginning of my career, which started as a teenager when I took a job at Marine Corps Base Camp Pendleton.  The uncertainty of that day, and what lay ahead, has been repeated time and again over the last 20 years.

With every change is a new beginning, and two decades later, I find myself on the verge of another one following months of wondering what my next role would be.

Organizations restructure.  They need to, at times, to adjust to changing market conditions, take advantage of new opportunities, or address misalignments in their current structure.  While there are benefits with restructuring – change creates opportunity and can shake things up – it also creates uncertainty for those caught up in it. In the course of many years of reorganizations, restructures and realignments, I have been laid off and promoted, kept in my role and traded to another.  I’ve helped lead the transformation and I’ve been just another impacted resource.  Over the years, I have learned a few lessons to help me get to the other side, ready to deliver in some new capacity.  Lessons I thought I’d share – knowing there are many caught up the same uncertainty that only ended for me a few days ago.

  Make sure people know what you want

No matter what your role in the organization, you have an opportunity to shape your own future.  If no one knows that you want to be considered for a leadership position, or the last thing you would want is to manage people, then how can your interests be considered?  They can’t.  You may not get what you want even if you communicate it, but you surely won’t if you no one knows.

  Know what you can live with

Going into a restructuring can be stressful, and the first thought might be “as long as I have a job, I’ll be okay.”  While that may be true, knowing up front  what you can and can’t live with provides a sense of owning your own outcomes, no matter what may be decided on your behalf.  If you are part of a couple, have a discussion up front about whether you can afford to hold out for the kind of work you really want, or if you want to take what’s given and then affect change from a position of strength (i.e. employment and a steady paycheck).  It’s a personal decision every person/couple must make based on their priorities and financial situation.  Who knows?  By having an open discussion about the possibilities, one of you may decide to be a stay at home parent or pursue a home-business dream.

  Accept that there will be things you cannot control

During change, do your best to keep your head and your sanity.  At some point, you will be on the other side of the decision-making and announcements.  No matter what the outcome, you’ll know where you are and at that point, you can move forward.  Whether you have a job, or the job you want, you can take action.  Until then, you can drive yourself crazy with “what ifs” and speculation.  Affect what you can, accept that there are things you can’t, and do your best to keep your head straight until all the facts are known.

  Relationships matter, but not without the ability to execute

Leaders look for individuals that can deliver when they are building out new organizations or transforming existing ones.  Who do they look to?  People they already know, or who are known quantities to trusted advisors.  Don’t wait for the next realignment.  Get out there.  Make yourself and your skills known – genuinely.  If you wait until you’re in a realignment to begin making those relationships, it’s too late.  It’s also too late to turn on the jets.  Perform every day like you could lose your job tomorrow.  It decreases the likelihood you will.

  Fellow Leaders – We must look out for our people

The previous suggestions apply to everyone.  As leaders, we need to have another focus besides our own future.  Our primary responsibility is to our people.  If we don’t look out for them, who will?  We are their best – and possibly only – voice at any table where decisions are being made.  We must make sure those above us know our key players and advocate for them.  Spreadsheets and data points are just facts.  What we know about our team – the people – cannot be fully captured in data.  We cannot wait until reorganization activities begin.  Instead, we should ensure our leadership knows who we rely on for our results as they happen.  While this isn’t about us individually, if we do our best by our teams, regret about what we didn’t do for them won’t follow us into our next role.

  Change is one of the few guarantees in life and we all have our methods for working through it.  What are your secrets to weathering the storm of organizational change?

  5 Things I’ve Learned During 20 Years of Uncertainty was originally published on LIVING LEADERSHIP

[kmwoodman]

Change Leadership - There is an "i" in Team

Image from Dreamstime Images

A few months ago, I wrote a post about the Change Leadership model I use when transforming organizations.  The model starts from the core principle that effective change can only be achieved when leaders focus on their teams.  By providing them with the communication and support they need through a transition, the team can make magic happen.

While I believe the model’s focus is generally correct, I left out a very important part of the equation.  As leaders, we are very  much a part of the teams we are leading. The old adage goes that “there’s no “i” in team.”  When it comes to change leadership, however, leaders have to remember that change is happening to us too.  It took a cheeseburger to remind me of this simple premise.

Not long ago, I was having a rough day.  There was a lot of change going on in my organization, which is something I normally enjoy.  For some reason, I was off, and I couldn’t figure out why.

I was in our cafeteria, trying to decide what to get for lunch.  It should have been an indication of my stress level that I was having a hard time making such a simple decision.  I finally decided on a cheeseburger.  Bad idea – I knew it wasn’t the most healthy choice – but I did it anyway.

I sat down at a table, determined to get away from my desk for a few minutes, and found a hockey puck where the hamburger should be.  Not literally, but it was charred to the point where I couldn’t eat it.  I went back to the grill, and this time got the more health conscious gardenburger.  As I watched it being prepared, I was concerned it would be undercooked and I was beside myself, wondering if I’d have to buy 3 lunches that day to get something I’d be willing to eat.

It must have been obvious to everyone around me that something was wrong.  One of our checkout ladies is very engaging and talks to many of us when we come through with breakfast or lunch.  She could tell something was bothering me, but let it go until the next morning.  She insisted that I not be charged for a second meal from the day before and that’s when I realized just how bad off I was.

My distress had nothing to do with the food.  It was me, pushed to my limits, being trigged by a silly cheeseburger.  It was clear I needed to take a break.  Not long after, that’s exactly what I did.

As leaders, our teams key off of us.  While it is critically important to give them what they need in the form of communication and support, we have to remember that we are also part of the team and change is happening to us as much as everyone else.

Taking the occasional break, assessing what’s happening and how we’re physically and emotionally responding to our surroundings, is critical for leaders so that we can adjust and get back to the most important part of our jobs.  Being the true north our teams need to navigate through the winds of change.

  Change Leadership – There is an “i” in Team was originally published on LIVING LEADERSHIP

[kmwoodman]

Introducing Change Without Tipping Over the Apple Cart

Spilled apples from Dreamstime Images

It’s fall here in New England – my favorite time of year.  It means carving pumpkins, amazing foliage, and apple picking.

Each year, the family goes out to hunt for apples.  We visit a local farm, and take one of their carts out into the orchard to find the best apples for pie and crisp.  With a little one about, invariably, the cart will get tipped over at least once during our voyage.

When the apple cart is tipped over, the reaction is pretty much the same each time:

1.  Mourn that the apple cart was tipped over.

2.  Right it.

3.  Put the apples back in it.

4.  Continue back down the path we were originally headed with those apples.

Change, by definition, disrupts the current flow of things.  Work activities, habits, goals and objectives are potentially upended and redefined to align with the change.  And change is good, right? Considering the reaction when an apple cart has been tipped over, what might be a natural reaction to change?

1.  Mourn the way things were.

2.  Pick back up the same skills and tools and process that were already in use.

3.  Embrace them like there’s no tomorrow.

4.  Adjust course to head back to the previous destination instead of the new one.

It is natural to resist change.  As human beings, we are instinctively looking for homeostasis – a stable, relatively constant condition.  That said, we also have the ability to adapt to a wide range of conditions in order to achieve homeostasis.  So, when our conditions change, we have the ability to change with them and get back to a place of stability and constancy.

The challenge for change leaders is introducing change in a way that does not feel like it is completely disrupting someone’s apple cart.

Participative Decision Making

It goes by many names, but at its core Participative Decision Making is the notion that those involved in their own outcomes are more satisfied with them.  The uncertainty and fear associated with change is alleviated through the participative process.

Change leaders have many ways to involve team members in the decision making process.  They can bring them to the table during the initial idea phase or as core team members in the planning and execution of a change.  Ultimately, even if everyone on a team cannot be involved due to time constraints, knowing that one of their peers was involved in the decision making process can increase support by the rest of the team.

When I first started out affecting change in organizations (note the absence of the word leader here), I thought it was my responsibility to figure out what needed to be done, how to do it, and then create and execute a plan to implement the change.  While fundamentally I am accountable, over time I discovered that by involving the people who were expected to live in the changed environment, the transformation of the organization happened faster and the adoption rate was much quicker than when I tried to do it all myself and “push” it on the team.

Involve the team…

Not long ago, I was asked to form a new team and change the way our organization created business requirements for systems development projects.  The team was selected and informed of their new roles.  That initial change was definitely a disruption of many apple carts.

That said, every day after was an opportunity for everyone on the team to participate in the change process.  Our new tools and processes were not defined.  So the team defined them.  The job of the leadership team was to provide the bumpers – the framework for success – and clear the way ahead of any political or organizational issues.  The real work was done by the team.  They identified existing tools, consolidated them, piloted the changes, developed training, and communicated and rolled out improvements.  They know their jobs better than those of us they work for, so they were asked to figure out how to do their jobs better.  They weren’t told how, they were asked how.

…and Achieve Better Outcomes 

Eighty people can accomplish more than one.  Involving all eighty in every aspect of our transformation resulted in a much faster execution than anyone anticipated.  Activities that should have taken months took weeks, and those that should have taken weeks took days.  Instead of resisting change, we had volunteers across the organization and at times our leadership team had to work to keep up with them!

While all change is a disruption of sorts, how that change is considered, communicated, and implemented can mean the difference between resistance and adoption.  I would encourage all change leaders to embrace the notion of participative decision making as a way to involve their teams in the outcomes that affect them, increasing the speed, quality and adoption rate of the end result.

  Introducing Change Without Tipping Over the Apple Cart was originally published on LIVING LEADERSHIP