I’ve decided I’m gonna go on a second diet.
There’s not nearly enough food on just the one.
KIROKAZE
almost home

Origami Around

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dirt enthusiast
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda

Janaina Medeiros
styofa doing anything
Sweet Seals For You, Always

Kaledo Art

roma★
hello vonnie
occasionally subtle
Cosimo Galluzzi
NASA
One Nice Bug Per Day
taylor price
Three Goblin Art
d e v o n
Game of Thrones Daily
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@laffgaff
I’ve decided I’m gonna go on a second diet.
There’s not nearly enough food on just the one.
I never understood odorless candles.
They don’t make scents.
My friend went for a job at a sunscreen factory but didn’t get it.
He’s going to reapply.
I used to work in a shoe recycling center.
It was sole destroying.
I bought my wife a lamp in the shape of a Coke bottle.
She was soda lighted.
Why isn’t suntanning an Olympic sport?
Because the best you can ever get is bronze.
They closed the local bridge today.
I still can’t get over it.
My friend got to the final of the local model railway competition.
He lost on points.
I saw a transparent billboard yesterday.
I thought to myself, "That's a clear sign".
Did you hear about the guy that was caught stealing hearing aids?
He was given the deaf penalty.
I don’t think I could cope with a job as a coffee taster.
How do they sleep at night?
Superman has cancelled his fight with Dracula because he can’t go near the crypt tonight.
This guy told me his friend Jack invented the hot tub.
I said, “Jack, who’s he?”
How do you know if Father Christmas is really a werewolf?
He has Santa claws.
My friend wouldn’t stop going on about how to make his folder smaller.
I told him to zip it.
My wife told me the leftover chicken would make a great sandwich.
It’s been an hour since I took it out of the fridge, and it still hasn’t made me a sandwich.
What do you call a guy who paints pictures of bikes on church ceilings?
Cycleangelo.