hi! Idk how to exactly word out my feelings properly and i have been asking about this situation from multiple bloggers and only some replied, which did help me temporarily but the shit just bounces back right on my face. I have been in this community since 2022 i believe, during that time I couldn't really understand much especially nd bloggers but as time passed by I learnt more and more. Even hopped on trends like the void for about an year, I kinda did succeed but wasn't able to materialize anything out of it. At the start of this year, seeing how unstable i was becoming, I decided to drop the methods, the expectations, the waiting and it sort of went on for few months until something really traumatic happened with me and even tho its been months I'm still not able to get out of it. At first, I thought okay this is the time to manifest everything altogether and not get used to my 3d but i couldn't change shit. I will not get into too much details but my privacy was violated and someone went through my ipad which was the only device i used and now im left with trauma, deleted data which im dying to get back, and loss of only source of security and comfort. Ik this question seems very silly to you and i look like a newbie who still doesn't know anything about the law but trust me when i say this, I've read multiple posts from bloggers like you, tried my best to detach, let go of vanessa and whatnot. Kelly recommended some exercises to me to process trauma and all and i did all that but the loop of embarrassment and shame continues. I really can't even imagine continuing this version of life rn. Pls suggest what can i do to deal with all this and wake up as "lara" in a whole another world
give up "lara". you're postponing your peace + happiness into the future. (also peace and happinness is within you NOW, not the "3d")
The past gives you an identity and the future holds the promise of "salvation," of fulfillment in whatever form. Both are illusions... As soon as you honor the present moment, all unhappiness and struggle dissolve, and life begins to flow with joy and ease. When you act out of present-moment awareness, whatever you do becomes imbued with a sense of quality, care, and love - even the most simple action.
Eckhart Tolle
it might be horrible to hear right now, but the future will not save you. all you are doing is waiting and avoiding yourself (this is what keeps you stuck).
if you're feeling stuck, that just means you're feeding yourself the same reality over and over again (the same story, thoughts, feelings, perspectives, etc.)
heavenlythea
you said you've read my posts? have you looked at this one? i recommend going back to kellys exercises, it'd be best to get to a neutral feeling first.
"something really traumatic happened with me and even tho its been months I'm still not able to get out of it. At first, I thought okay this is the time to manifest everything altogether"
grasping for control through manifestation just doesn't work.
you haven't dealt with these emotions so they keep coming back. i suggest you read the first chapters of letting go by david hawkins, or if you can't be bothered read this from kelly. i also want you to look through the way of rest by jeff foster. (i really suggest you read this!)
you haven't given yourself any rest period, you went straight into trying to force an outcome. give it up, the body-mind cannot do the work of god that you want. (the body-mind doesn't do anything, it can't. the Self is already perfect and "doing" everything. all you can do is let it. let it be.)
emotions will come up and leave by themselves - if you find them stuck, then investigate why.
e.g. what are you seeking with lara? is there any more emotions underneath the embarrassment and shame? is this a desire of approval, safety or control - can you let it go?
"Kelly recommended some exercises to me to process trauma and all and i did all that but the loop of embarrassment and shame continues."
this shows that you haven't changed how you respond to the emotions.
the more persistant emotions will leave once you understand your relation to them. once you realise that emotions can be there without it meaning anything about you, or meaning that the worst is to come - they leave naturally. if you are not the feelings and thoughts, then you cannot be hurt by them. you can stop avoiding them. you are safe to let them go.
if you approach the embarrasment with the understanding that you are not the body-mind then it becomes small. embarrasment is completely fine to be there, and nothing is forever. you don't need so and so to be complete as you are. you don't have to be embarrassed if all is Self, theres no one to look upon you and judge - except you. forgive yourself and move on.
why torture yourself with judgment and expectations?
if you really know the law or nd, then return to the basics and give up the rest.
if you really must keep manifesting, then i suggest ONLY thisdreamplace. stop consuming multiple blogs and start working by yourself.
(i really just regurgitated this post unknowingly - please go and read it anon, all the answers are already here. but you have to start.)
