Jet Skis on the Moat Analysis
So this is a song that I think kind of stumps a lot of people, even those trying to analyze it from a Milex perspective -- and, if there is any truth to Milex, trying to analyze the song from that perspective should, in theory, give us a head start, but even so this one seemed particularly opaque and even random to many.
But I actually find that I can see a coherent, consistent narrative here, one that matches with some previous theories, and I don't believe I've seen anyone articulate it in the exact same way I'm going to so *cracks knuckles* here we go:
I've seen some people write off this line because of Alex claiming it was just the first line he spontaneously sang over the music to this song, but that doesn't mean he didn't already have the idea for it, and that doesn't mean it's meaningless.
I don't think it's meaningless at all. Let's think about it: you typically ride jet skis on open water, like the ocean, so you can go as fast and as far as you want. A moat is a small body of water that just exists around the perimeter of a castle. Not very ideal for riding jet skis on as I can't imagine it would be very fun with it being so limiting. At the very least it wouldn't be fun for very long.
A moat is also a defense mechanism, designed to ward off anyone from getting into and harming the castle. So the way I see it, someone who would ride a jet ski on the moat is someone who is forbidden from leaving the castle where they are protected. Riding a jet ski on the moat represents a small, tiny moment of fun/freedom that isn't truly free, and will be over far too quickly. Before being required to return to the walls of the castle.
So if you haven't caught on by now, I see the 'castle' as representing the consequences of being in a band as big as Arctic Monkeys. A fortress of secrecy that Alex (and the band) lives in in order to protect the image expected of him/them.*
Riding a jet ski on the moat would be a risky, yet contained act of temporary rebellion... AKA: the ECYTE tour of 2016.
They shot it all in CinemaScope
Just gonna add in this post here: (x)
Shot it all in CinemaScope... for the stunning documentary that no one else unfortunately saw?
^^this, of course, being a line from 'One Point Perspective,' a song off TBHC in 2017. And often thought (by Milex fans at least) to refer to the shelved ECYTE film that was never released for unknown reasons.
'One Point Perspective' btw, also contains the lyric: "By the time reality hits, the chimes of freedom fell to bits," which is also thought to be about the ECYTE tour and seems, if I do say so myself, to go right along with what I'm thinking is being talked about here as well.
As though it's the last time you're gonna ride
Fairly self-explanatory. I mean... there hasn't been a TLSP3 yet. Maybe there never will be.
I'm reminded of the "I found out the hard way, here ain't no place for dolls like you and me" from 'Star Treatment' as well. In my analysis of that song, I -- as well as others -- have speculated that that line could be referencing some kind of reprimanding Alex got after after some of his and Miles' ECYTE antics. (Too unhinged. Too theatre kid-ish. Too uncool. Too high. Too gay. Y'know.)
So this line could be ruefully referencing the irony of a documentary being made commemorating the period of time that was the beginning of the ending of at least their professional partnership (and possibly personal relationship -- remember that Alex and Miles also seemed to have some kind of bad falling out (break up?) after the end of ECYTE) as they knew it, though they couldn't have known that at the time.
Come over here and give your buddy a hug
Like 'alcoholics anonymous' obviously. Except instead of being addicted to alcohol, this is a group for people addicted to and needing to quit 'showstopping,' or giving over the top, theatrical performances, kind like what he and Miles did all throughout 2016.
So you can imagine Alex and Miles meeting up again somewhere afterward, both having had to 'sober up' and leave the ECYTE tour behind them.
So much for decidin' not to let it slide
And then maybe they put their own personal past behind them as well.
Deciding you're not going to let something slide sounds like what someone would do after an incident or argument with someone else that was maybe hurtful to them somehow. Like, deciding to put a boundary up when it comes to that person.
But the line actually implies that maybe the anger then dissipated and the boundary went out the window upon actually finally seeing the other person again. And they just hugged and kissed and made up instead(?).
However, I'm confused as to the pov here though. There are definitely other lines in this song, that I'm getting to, that seem to me like Alex talking to himself. So I don't know if he's doing that here as well? "Come over here and give your buddy a hug" -- is he telling Miles to come over to him, or is he telling himelf to go over to Miles? Or is this whole part not actually about Miles at all and is just older Alex making amends with a younger version of himself?
Idk, I just know the "So much for decidin' not to let it slide" line still implies to me some sort of personal anger or private conflict, which means we'll never be able to fully decipher it if that's the case. Since it's unlikely we'll ever know what "it" actually is. :/
Is there somethin' on your mind
Or are you just happy to sit there and watch
While the paint job dries?
Again, I don't know if this is Alex talking to someone else (Miles) or to himself. What I do know is that I think one could easily make a connection between the "paint job" discussed here and another song on this album, 'Body Paint.' Which, in turn, can be connected to the album's title.
Just gonna add another post here: (x)
^^In short: "The Car" = Alex, "body paint" = the persona he's been compelled to adopt. The paint job 'drying' would be like the act of transitioning from his real self to the persona -- the process of putting on the costume, so to speak
So, I lean towards the idea that this is Alex talking to himself, asking himself if he's actully happy with this double life of sorts, if he feels like he's really in control of it, or is he just powerlessly observing it happening but can't really say or do anything about it.
When it's over, you're supposed to know
If we're assuming this still refers to the line before it -- the process of putting on the costume or 'watching the paint job dry' -- then similar to how I interpet the entirety of 'Body Paint' itself, I interpret this to mean that maybe Alex is unsure now of where his real self ends and the persona begins and vice versa.
(Maybe also could refer to the end of ECYTE, the end of freedom -- or the end of his and Miles' relationship. Like it doesn't feel like it's all fully over, even though he knows logically that it is and that it has to be? Idk.)
Lights out in the Wonder Park
Again, probably represents the actual end of ECYTE, of freedom, of 'jetskiing', of his and Miles' relationship (professional or otherwise).
Not sure if there's any significance to the words "the Wonder Park", or if you can draw any correlation between them and Miles' song, 'The Wonder' -- assumed to be about Alex.
In someone else's analysis (x) of this song though, they write this:
'Lights out in the Wonder Park' has genuinely got me wondering if there was some kind of break-up convo between MK and AT in a fairground/similar. Lots of folks think MK's Caroline is about AT (he admitted he changed the name and pronouns), and that refers to 'We're sitting on the carousel [...] My god I know this all too well'.
^^which is intriguing to me. Because it even makes sense that "Caroline" would be used as a name for Alex because of the whole 'Alex = The Car' thing. (And 'Caroline' came out the same year as the Car album).
Your saw-toothed lover boy was quick off the mark
Alex talking to himself. And I'll give you one guess who his saw-toothed lover boy is. And then provide another post to check out: (x)
The only thing I really want to say about this line -- obviously we all already think it's about Miles -- is that I've seen people think the line refers to Miles' penchant for running away or whatever (which he has acknowledged about himself in some of his songs), but in this case I think it's more that people don't seem to know what the phrase "quick off the mark" means?
"Quick off the mark" means something akin to quick to understand, quick to pick up on something.
So, in this context, it's more like: ECYTE was ending, things were never going to be the same, everything was falling apart, Alex is forced to shift hard in the direction of the persona, and Miles was quick to understand all this. He knew too what it all meant and that things were ending. And I'm guessing he probably didn't take it well. ("Quick off the mark" could also refer to someone reacting without thinking or impulsively.)
That's long enough in the sunshine for one night
Others have discussed before the link between speculated Milex songs and love occurring in the dark or only at night -- "that the nights were mainly made for saying things you can't say tomorrow day," "all of our exchanges are by candlelight," etc. One may also remember Miles' album title: "Sunlight in the Shadows"
Though actually, I'm not gonna speculate on that too much. I was planning to when I started out on this post, but now, as I'm writing it, honestly, I think I could much more easily draw another parallel -- I could actually very easily see this as being instead about a much more literal tanning booth(?). Especially because one has also been mentioned in a different Arctic Monkeys song:
"For a master of deception and subterfuge
You've made yourself quite the bed to lie in
Do your time travelling through the tanning booth
So you don’t let the sun catch you crying"
^^What's just shocked me is I remembered that lyric but not what song (or even album) it was from until I looked it up and suprise, surprise, it's 'Body Paint' again from the same album. And we're also talking about the double life thing again.
Didn't recognize you through the smoke
Pajama pants and a Subbuteo cloak
I think this is Alex thinking to a younger version of himself. And how maybe he doesn't recognize himself anymore. Subbuteo is a game that he apparently played when he was younger. (It's mentioned in this interview here (x) at 26:53. Alex is, of course, useless at actually answering any questions, but he does reference the 'subbuteo cloak' as if he, himself would be the one wearing it, further backing up the idea that this song is largely Alex talking to himself).
You know that it's alright if you wanna cry
Alex talking to himself again.🥺
(!) Note how both this and the stanza above from Body Paint could potentially be about the exact same moment: Alex sitting in a tanning booth, reminiscing about the past or his younger years ("do your time travelling through the tanning booth") and ending up crying.
(Which is kind of crazy. It's like the same song was put on The Car album twice, just in two different fonts.)
Is there somethin' on your mind
Or are you just happy to sit there and watch
While the paint job dries?
When it's over, you're supposed to know
Jet skis on the moat
They shot it all in CinemaScope
As though it's the last time you're gonna ride
And the rest of the song is just these repeat lyrics.
(*There's a video interview I reference above that I need to bring up again one last time -> (x). Because my whole interpretation of the original 'jet skis on the moat' line is based on the idea of Alex feeling hidden away as if in a fortified castle. So I felt really vindicated when it was only after I had already come up with that on my own, that I watched this interview and heard Alex, at 24:40, refer to: "the moat, around the castle, that we all live in," meaning the band as a whole, while talking about this song.)
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