Living Not Existing

This is me. I live, laugh and love everyday. #DMV

[lamonte13]

Todya is a little better. A good friend even told me I deserve better.

[lamonte13]

I’m depressed, and I admit it.

I don’t know how to shake it. I don’t know what to do.

Im laying here barely barley doing work.

Why try

[lamonte13]

What is the point of even trying…

[lamonte13]

Am I not deserving of love? I was told I will never we have a successful relationship. I will never be happy and I’m starting to believe it. Words said to me.

[lamonte13]

I’m in a dark place and place I never thought I would be. I don’t feel motivated to wake up to eat. I just want to lay here. I allowed a person to destroy the light I had and it’s sad.

[lamonte13]

It’s been a while tumblr

[keithbyrneart]

[cootiekid]

X-Men by Chase Conley

[ampervadasz]

[lamonte13]

Even though pride celebrations was canceled it doesn’t mean we can’t celebrate. I am unapologetically me and I love who I grown into. Spread love and not hate!! Happy pride everyone. If you know someone who needs help please assist. We have to help one another mentally, physically, and emotionally.

Pic: 2019 world pride nyc

[lamonte13]

Just laying here staring at the darkness. My mind falling within the darkness. It’s calm. I like clam. Calm used to make me nervous. I think I need to embrace the calm more.

I want to be touched right now in this darkness. A light touch. Sometime to say I’m not alone in this darkness. Would like the touch to be cold, yet delicate. Enough to know that I’m being touched.

Random stuff random night...

[shelgon]

[lamonte13]

Thoughts

I would like to see what the future holds. I attend to think about the future to much but I want to see if this decision will change anything between us. Time will tell and I pray nothing will goes wrong. 

[hitmewithcute]

[ampervadasz]

[lamonte13]

I am nervous,

I love hard... I love deep.... I love unconditionally....

This happens naturally and sometimes it can make me blind. I’m going down this same path again, where I love so hard. This time I’m afraid. I hate to admit it but I’m terrified. I don’t want to be hurt. I hear this from friends “hurt may come and it’s part of life”. I get that but that doesn’t help the fear.

However, what I’m feeling I do like. I like loving someone deeply. I love giving my all. I love wanting to make the significant other happy.

I know I just need to look forward and stay positive. Stay strong and stay smart. It will be okay. This is Just feelings and thoughts that come about before I sleep.

Just want to continue to be happy and just continue to love deep, hard and unconditionally. That’s all. I pray no pain comes this direction. I pray this love continues for a very long time. To be clear nothing is wrong. There are no signs. So life is good

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

you are enough.

you are enough.

you are enough.

you are enough.

you are enough.