A Performer's Masquerade

[laurenosull-blog]

A very exciting new masquerade!

Hello lovely people. Happy Thursday Friday (today is basically a Friday because HELLO 4-DAY WEEKEND!) I have some news regarding a recent addition to my masquerade collection. I have an official (ish) title of Writer for au-di-tions.com! I’m super excited that I get to write articles on issues and inspiration within the dance world on a platform that reaches a HUGE international online audience. For those budding dancers out there, if you are not aware of au-di-tions.com then I am here to educate you. It is a website that lists dance auditions, workshops, and provides inspiration and information across all topics in the dance industry. It’s awesome, go check it out: http://au-di-tions.com/ (And I’m not just saying that because I write for them, I’ve been using the website for a while now and it’s helped me a lot).

As much as I am excited about this new opportunity, it’s also pretty daunting! I didn’t train to become a writer, I didn’t take classes, and there is no ‘how-to’ guide on writing an article. I took ideas from our topics board and now I’m currently in the research phase for my first article. *Gulp*. It’s so great to be able to learn about the topic as I write; it turns all of those spare hours on reception into hours with purpose - well spent on something worthwhile. I always say to anyone else in a job for the ‘in-between’, never just sit and endure…if you have the means: read, explore, LEARN. Better yourself. Imagine: little me sat at my reception desk tapping away and squinting at the screen (looking like I’m working really hard…) can create an impact on other people’s knowledge on an international scale!

I don’t want to give too much away as to what I’m currently writing about…the point of a masquerade is the element of mystery and intrigue after all. However I will say that it has put me back in touch with an incredible dancer who is an inspiration to me and I’m sure many others. I’m so glad to be writing this article with her support because it’s such an important issue to talk about and raise awareness about within our industry. Keeping conversations going about issues or sensitive topics in dance is so important especially in this era of social media takeover. Everywhere you look you are influenced by images and opinions of what a certain society believes to be ‘perfect’. I say ‘certain society’ because these ideals of perfection differ depending on the context of which community they are perceived within. For example, within the dance community there is a certain ideal physique (which even differs between genres of dance). This perfectionist ideal is starting to be challenged and questioned now and we must work on continuing to blur the lines on the little tick boxes we try and fit ourselves into. I always say: ‘Why would you want to look like everyone else?!’ Look like you. Be you.

Well there you go, a little Thursday (end of the week!) motivation for ya :) Happy Easter all! Enjoy the long weekend and eat wayyyy too much chocolate.

[laurenosull-blog]

Seedy Lentil Fritters

It's happening. I'm (finally) posting my first recipe! New masquerade alert: Chef! It comes from part of a recipe from www.veganricha.com - an awesome blog written by Richa Hingle, all her recipes are vegan and loads of them are nut-free, gluten-free, soy-free (anything else free!) and influenced by her Indian upbringing: YUM. The recipe I'm sharing with you is for Seedy Lentil Fritters/Balls. With spices, seeds, spinach and of course lentils these are truly little bites of goodness. It was one of those moments when you've just tried a recipe for the first time, you're not really sure how it will turn out, and it's literally perfect. There is a pause after the first bite as your taste buds manage to convince your brain that YOU MADE THIS AND YOU ARE A GENIUS/FOOD GOD. I don't know about you but I'm always a bit wary about making veggie 'meatballs' and how they will hold together...I pretty much convinced myself while making these lentil balls that they would fall apart at the slightest touch. Especially without an egg. Nope. Not this time. These are magical balls.

The great thing with these is that you can literally put them with anything. Get creative! Even though these have an Indian spice profile I basically treated mine like falafel. I paired them with flatbreads, hummus, roasted red peppers and spinach/greens. It was dreamy. They could easily be put into a salad, served with sweet potato fries and roasted peppers (is it just me or is it normal to want to accompany everything with sweet potato fries?!), or over rice or other grains with a bit of mango chutney perhaps! Or you could just eat them straight off the tray...not that I've done that...yet. It's funny, very quickly into this vegan(ish) experiment I'm already in the mind set that I'm not missing out on anything. I thought I'd be worrying at every meal about what could replace meat in my nutrient profile but it never even crosses my mind. There is so much out there to provide ALL the nutrients we need...seeds, pulses, brassicas, nuts, oils, grains, and veggies of course!

Right, I'll stop waffling on now...(mmm waffles, I need to find a vegan recipe for those). Here is the recipe:

Seedy Lentil Fritters

Ingredients 2 tsp oil 1 small onion, chopped 4 cloves of garlic, chopped ½ tsp ground cumin ½ tsp ground coriander 1 tsp turmeric 1/2 tsp ground cardamom 1/2 tsp cayenne ½ cup lentils, washed and drained 1.5 cups water ½ tsp salt 1 tbsp parsley or 1 tsp dried ½ cup packed chopped spinach 1 tsp lemon juice 1 tbsp chia seeds 1 tbsp flax seed meal or more chia seeds 1 tbsp toasted sesame seeds 1/4 cup breadcrumbs (1 slice of bread)

Method

Heat oil in a saucepan over medium heat. Add onion, garlic and a pinch of salt. Cook until translucent. 4 to 5 mins. Stir occasionally.

Add all the spices and drained lentils. Mix and cook for a minute.

Add salt and water and cook for 11 minutes partially covered. Uncover, fold in spinach and parlsey and cook for 3 to 4 minutes or until the lentils are cooked and all the liquid is absorbed. The mixture will be soft. Taste and adjust salt and heat.

Add chia seeds, flax seeds, sesame seeds and mix in. Transfer to a bowl and chill the lentil mixture for half an hour.

Preheat the oven to 210C. Mix in ¼ cup breadcrumbs to the lentil mixture. If it is too sticky, add some flour. The mixture will be soft but should get easily shaped into soft balls without too much sticking or squishing. Scoop out the lentil mixture and shape into balls with your hands. It will get messy! Place them onto a parchment lined baking sheet. Spray oil on the balls. Bake for 20 minutes.

Well there you have it. And they're even baked not fried! This recipe is vegan, nut-free, soy-free and could easily be made gluten-free with gluten-free breadcrumbs or coarsely ground oats. Enjoy munching.

[laurenosull-blog]

Eating my veggies...

For the past month or so now, I’ve been experimenting with a more plant-based diet. The idea to make some changes to my food choices had always been in the back of my mind since I worked on a cruise ship. My cabin mate was vegan and without her being pushy about it, I learnt a lot about the lifestyle through osmosis. When you are sharing a tiny cabin room with someone for 6 months, you share EVERYTHING. If you’ve ever worked on a cruise ship you will know that the food options are limited. The officer’s mess provides a buffet of various dishes…if they don’t contain meat, they almost always contain cheese or cream. I had so much respect for my cabin mate for sticking with her veganism – literally living off the vegetable side dishes and nuts. Peanut butter and rice cakes were a cabin room staple; she used to eat peanut butter by the spoon some days to try and get some extra protein! Our stint travelling around India was the vegan’s dream. Most people don’t realise that a lot of authentic Indian food is vegetarian (and often vegan), as vegetarianism is a big part of the culture over there.

If the seed was planted by my cabin mate, it was watered by Jonathan Safran Foer, author of the book Eating Animals. I didn’t seek out this book with the intention of becoming a vegetarian; it simply intrigued me to find out more about the process of eating animals. From the reasons why we eat animals in the first place, to how most ‘farming’ practices operate to provide the meat that we eat, I was curious. I put farming in speech marks because from what I have learnt I wouldn’t consider most of the animal agriculture methods to resemble my ideas of a ‘farm’. They are production lines: there to make the most profit out of as little expenditure as possible. It simply doesn’t fit their economical model to raise animals as animals. Instead, they are developed as products (the word ‘raised’ implies care was given). I decided that I didn’t want to eat meat that was harvested from an animal so removed from its heritage by selective breeding that it can no longer function normally. The animals bred for most types of animal agriculture can’t walk around, not because they are jammed into sheds so tightly (although that is a factor), but because they are so grotesque that they simply can’t walk. They are pumped full of antibiotics to keep them alive (not healthy, just simply alive) long enough so that they can grow to their slaughter size and be killed.

However, the major reason for me cutting down my meat consumption is the impact that animal agriculture has on our planet. It is the biggest single contributing factor to global warming, not to mention it uses up insane amounts of land and water. Forget cutting down on your shower time or feeling guilty for filling up the bath tub, swap a meaty meal for a veggie one and you’ll make a lot more impact. Eating meat has always been a part of my life; it is a part of our family life. Sunday roasts cooked by Mum bring us together as a unit and the sharing and eating of food is an important part of that. By educating myself about what I’m eating, I want to eat well: for myself, for the animals that nourish me, and for the planet. I’m eating meat maybe about twice a month now to lower the impact on the planet. When I do buy meat, it is well-sourced (raised and slaughtered in the same location), organic, natural (as in not a genetic freak)…and YUMMY! I’m buying my eggs from the farm down the road (yes there is a farm in London!), and I’m looking to eat sheep and goat cheese.

I started writing this post with the intention of sharing an awesome vegan recipe for seedy lentil fritters that I made last week, but it appears I have rambled on again! I’ll just have to tempt you with it now so that you read my next post (sorry Laura!). Tehe. I hope to include more and more recipes as I continue my blog and I’ll prove to you guys that eating vegetables is FAR from boring or unsatisfying. I even put them in my baking! It feels good to explain myself in writing as I’m still feeling a bit lost for what to coherently say when people ask about the changes I’ve made to eating animals. I guess it’s just another masquerade for my list: veggie ambassador! I honestly believe that everyone should eat what they think is appropriate for them, but with a little education about eating animals perhaps those thoughts might change. I’m just sharing my choices here so that this post might become that little seed for a few more people – ready to be watered in time.

[laurenosull-blog]

A Break From Reality

In keeping with my previous post about balance, last weekend I decided to swap the busy, bustling London for a dose of countryside in the little town of Belper, near Derby. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE London. But sometimes you can forget that in most other places in the country it actually gets dark...as in pitch black. There is a chance to actually switch off. On Sundays, shops close...ALL DAY. In case you're wondering, Belper wasn't a random choice plucked from the map; my oldest, bestest friend has just moved into her own place there and a visit was well overdue.

Firstly, her place is charming. A great big lounge area, modern kitchen, bedroom with a built-in wardrobe and the BEST shower I have ever experienced. Positively dreamy. Ummm why did I think renting in London was a good idea? Make no mistake, I feel very lucky in the flat I have in London and my flatmates are wicked, but I would totally be lying if I said I wasn't jealous. The best bit is that she has more glasses for containing alcoholic beverages than we have total glassware in our flat! I reckon she's got cupboard space priorities bang on. Or she just has more cupboard space. Safe to say, we got through most of those glasses on rotation throughout the weekend with the help of our friends Prosecco and Gin. It was so liberating to completely let my hair down and get some headspace from the constant 'to-do list' that seems to be whirring around in my head on a daily basis.

I've found that being self-employed, whilst great for flexibility, can create a confusing tangle of projects and responsibilities in my head. Rather than a brainstorm it can prove to be quite the brain hurricane at times! The weekend with my friend gave me that short break I needed to switch off the wind machines in my head and give everything a chance to settle. I didn't have to worry about what time to get up, the logistics of where to be at what time, what I was eating (and drinking!) and what expectations people had of me. It gave me time to get out of my head and just be.

On Friday we baked camembert, made bruschetta, drank prosecco and binge watched Netflix. Girls’ Night In perfection. Waking up with (slightly) sore heads on Saturday we spent the day shopping and got rather over-excited at a purchase of a sparkly dress from Zara (it's the little things), giggling along to the 'My Dad Wrote a Porno' podcast on the way home. If you haven't listened to this podcast I urge you to do so right now. Stop reading this and go and listen to it. I can't help but outright belly laugh at it. Saturday night meant pizza and a night out (accompanied by a bottle of gin and a friend from hockey). Cue a Cuban nightclub, several glasses of water (gotta keep hydrated to bust them moves!), and a rotating wind fan. We had a blast. Literally. Waking up with (slightly sorer) sore heads on Sunday, a day of rest was deserved. We walked up the high street (none of the shops were open – imagine!) to the little independent cinema, ‘The Ritz’, to watch Sing. It was the perfect feel-good animation film for a hungover Sunday and we even treated ourselves to the ‘luxury’ seats and (another) glass of water!

There you have it – the antics of my weekend away. My break from reality. Well I’ve been back to reality for a week now and as you can tell from the week delay of this post, very busy! It seems that the very nature of London prevents anything but a busy week. If you haven’t planned much at the beginning of the week, trust me, you’ll find something to fill in those extra hours…even if you don’t want to! But I can’t deny it, I love it. Getting a weekend away every now and then is perfect for balance…but I’m always itching to get back to London. I crave it.

[laurenosull-blog]

Balance

This post is inspired by last night's catch up with a good friend of mine over some GREAT food (made by her!). #foodwithfriends :D As an avid foodie (I really don't care if I clog up people's insta feeds with my latest food ventures - it's not annoying, it's art), I don't think you can beat the combo of food shared with friends. We chatted about all the usual things you'd expect 2 girls in their 20's to natter about...but we also touched on the concept of balance.

Balance seems like a very innocent, simple term, however it carries many different meanings. Defined in the dictionary as:

noun 1. a state of equilibrium or equipoise; equal distribution of weight, amount, etc. 2. something used to produce equilibrium; counterpoise 3. mental steadiness or emotional stability; habit of calm behaviour, judgment, etc. 4. a state of bodily equilibrium: He lost his balance and fell down the stairs. 5. an instrument for determining weight 6. the remainder or rest: He carried what he could and left the balance for his brother to bring.

What we were talking about didn't really fit into any of these definitions but the 7th definition the dictionary gives draws close:

7. the power or ability to decide an outcome by throwing one's strength, influence, support, or the like, to one side or the other.  

To make conscious and deliberate decisions about the nature and amount of 'life tasks' we undertake is to create our own balance. This sense of balance will differ from person to person; we are all unique. But perhaps the idea of balance has never really crossed your mind in the first place. Have you ever taken a step back for a moment and considered how balanced you feel? Not in terms of if you might be about to fall over (this is me on a daily basis), but whether all the components of YOUR life, however big or small each one may be, balance in a way that is conducive to your happiness?

It doesn't have to be some big analysis of your life. Just acknowledge it. Your life is what you make it and its affairs shouldn't have to be 'endured'. Especially work related affairs. If you dread going to work, ask yourself why? Is there something you can do to change this? In today's society it has increasingly become the norm to view our work as a burden. Something we must endure for the greater good. Yes, often it is for the greater good, but it shouldn't mean we have to slog away at it for the rest of our working life. That's not balance. Make it balance by figuring out your 'greater good': a forward moving, positive end result.

My many 'masquerades' require a lot of balancing on my part, but they all have their counterbalances. This blog is a prime example of me finding a counteraction to the feeling of monotony I experienced at being behind the reception desk. I simply decided to do something about it: namely write about it. Share it. I can get a sense of a greater good by sharing my contemplations (I have A LOT of time to think them through) with whoever might fancy a read. And that makes me feel good. So thank you if you have taken the time to read my blog - you have contributed to my balance.

[laurenosull-blog]

Back again...but moving forward

Here I am, back at THAT reception desk again, whiling away the hours...It’s given me an opportunity to reflect back to the time that I worked my first day here. Don’t worry I’m not going to get all sentimental, I hardly have any strong emotional attachments to the place. I mean reflection of my self - I now have a different perspective; things have shifted. And I think for the better.

I used to sit here naively despairing on how unfair the performing arts industry is and how I never get auditions and HOW AM I EVER GOING TO GET A JOB? I felt helpless to do anything and it felt like I was getting nowhere (apart from Tower Hill every morning). I was feeling powerless because I willingly gave the power over to someone else, anyone else. They’d have the right connections and know what to do and it’s their fault if they don’t get anything for me. This is crazy. I see that now. So many graduates feel as though opportunities and auditions will simply present themselves and they have to wait for people to give these to them. That way, if they don’t get anything then it’s not their fault, they dilly dally on in denial of the fact that they aren’t actually doing anything. At least their agent or friend or contact is TRYING to do something. It’s great to have people helping you with good connections, but it doesn’t mean that you can’t get involved in YOUR OWN LIFE too. Go out and find yourself opportunities.

With social media so abundant with news, tips, and shares of jobs and opportunities it’s plain lazy not to get involved in some way. One of the best ways to meet new people and make connections is to help people out. Collaborate. Meet people from all corners of the industry: photographers, film makers, directors, make-up artists, writers - CREATIVES. We’re all in the same boat, everyone is looking for ways to develop and expand their craft, so lets work together and benefit from each other’s skills.

For example, a photographer might want to build up their portfolio or create a project with a dancer and the dancer then gets some great new shots. The dancer might then recommend a friend who would be great for a different perspective on their project because they are a dancer of a different style. The photographer is grateful for helping them out and actually they know of this videographer who is looking for dancers to shoot a music video, and so the help circle continues. It’s like a help ecosystem.

Ok so you’re not going to get West End Musical contracts this way but you never know who knows who and by helping people out and generally being a kind and willing human it makes a difference.

As long as you are pro-active in what is essentially YOUR business it won’t go unnoticed. Commercial business owners would never just sit back and wait for people to become interested in their products, so neither can you. Make people interested in you. Invest whatever you can back into your business. Go to workshops, go to classes, meet people, ask questions, BE INTERESTING. If you are willing to work hard for what you love and you approach every opportunity (no matter how small) with intensity and vitality then you are automatically interesting. People want to work with people that are ENGAGED. So go out there and ENGAGE! Move forward.

[laurenosull-blog]

Reception friends!

Sitting behind a different reception desk this morning, I’m looking out of the lavish glass paneled front onto a grim, rainy London morning. That sounds a bit gloomy but perhaps I’m feeling slightly sorry for myself. I spent the morning trying to purchase Ed Sheeran tickets...surprisingly I wasn’t successful. This has nothing to do with another masquerade (I’m not a ticket tout or anything!), I just thought I’d share my misfortune with you guys in case you were in the same boat and we can console each other together. Poor us.

Right, onto business. As you can probably tell from the fact that I am writing this at my desk, it’s not very busy here either. But I do have friends! There are 3 of us on this reception team, a little extravagant I feel, but I’m not complaining! There’s not much to tell though, I issue visitor passes now and again...ooh and the fire alarm test happened this morning - exciting times! The other two girls are lovely and we chat about clothes, boys and going out for curry. One of them is hitting the gym in her lunch break (sorry what? - I’ll be sat in the kitchen stuffing my face). But I’m going to the gym after work so it’s all good...definitely warrants a slice of that chocolate chip banana bread I made yesterday. It’s diminishing fast. Once it’s got the flatmate seal of approval that thing just disappears. Poof. In my opinion nothing brings friends together quite so well as food. Eating food, talking about food, sharing pictures of food...it bonds us. But more posts about food to come (spoiler: I’ve got some lovely HEALTHY flapjack and muffin recipes up my sleeve).

Friends, or company, at work make everything better. When it’s busy they help out or advise. Or joke about that dick who came in demanding something stupid. When it’s slow they’re there to chat, granted they’re not DMC’s but who wants to get that heavy at work?! It’s HUMAN INTERACTION. The contrast between the two receptions isn’t much on the surface but to me the impact is huge. It’s made me truly appreciate human company again. It’s already nearly 2pm! The day is flying by! It’s very broadening to listen to other people’s stories and journeys that got them to where they are now...and where they hope to be. As a performer it makes me realise that it isn’t just us! So many different types of people work as a receptionist to ‘fill in the gaps’, for so many different reasons. Out of my two reception friends today, one is studying at university in the evenings and one is taking some time to think about what she really wants to do, and EARNING MONEY while she figures it out. Good for them. Nearly all front of house receptionists I’ve met are only ‘doing this for now’. And that’s fine. In fact, I think that’s great. It means that there is an ambition and a yearning to want to do something greater.

This has turned into quite a motivational post...a little pick me up gem for those of you out there who feel a bit like the London weather looks. So my step by step guide for surviving those office blues might look a bit like this:

Get some friends

Talk to those friends

Feel better

Of course it all rather depends on the crucial first step. Whether you have access to friends or not. The only other solution I can offer is to ring up any available existing friends on the reception phone and pretend to be talking to someone very official if anyone comes close to you. As a receptionist you should have the art of discretion (checking personal emails, social media, online clothes shopping on the company computer - shhhh) down to a T. Happy friending!

[laurenosull-blog]

The 3rd masquerade

This week was the beginning of an exciting new term of ballet lessons for the little darlings of Chelsea. From as little as 2 years old they get dressed up in their pink ballet leotards and tutus, their beaming (or crying) faces jostling at the door. It’s a joyous half hour spent running around a dance studio and talking to the magical ballet fairies and unicorns. That is, after we get past the momentous and life-changing stories of Christmas holidays and excursions. Some of the children get so excited they cease to have the ability to talk...it takes 5 minutes to wait for one word to be stuttered out. Oh but you mustn’t interrupt. God forbid. After all that’s what ballet is for right, stories? Except they are usually fictitious stories made up by the teacher to facilitate in the learning of ballet vocabulary, but lets not get too technical; they’re only little.

So, my 3rd masquerade is: assistant ballet teacher. 100 points to you if you guessed correctly. Oh yes, that DDI course at college really paid off. If I’m coming across as a bit sarcastic then good, that’s what I was going for. But I’m not complaining. It’s actually hilarious. I love teaching and getting to plan my own lessons, especially for older kids, it’s really fulfilling. I can’t argue that assistant ballet teaching is quiiiite as fulfilling but it’s a heck of a lot easier than being the teacher of those baby ballet lessons. I have so much respect for the teachers that I assist. Honestly, those women are heroes. It means that I can enjoy observing class and watch the amusing incidents unfold. And now I will share the pick of the week with you lovely people.

(I must just say, I adore the children that I assist and I would never say a cruel word about them. What I write, I write for amusement and dramatic effect, and I may sliiiightly exaggerate. Of course I will never identify any children, parents or teachers).

Tuesday’s classes were off to a bang with a child that refused to move. She had the face of an unyielding teenager, a look of utter disbelief at the fact that she had been brought to this strange hall and told to copy a strange woman who talked about glitter fairies and walks in the magical forest. She proceeded to sit and watch (or should I say judge) as the other children happily bounded around the room perfecting their ‘fairy wings’. The next class brought with it a bawling toddler, tears and snot streaming down her face, apparently unable to stop. A true martyr, she joined in and continued for the whole of the class. Quite impressive I thought. I mean what a workout! The rest of the classes passed without much drama, after all, they are older and should know better. I must say, the last class is an absolute joy to assist and I know I will become very proud of them.

Friday meant my first ‘babysitting duty’. Whilst the first class do their ballet lesson I look after the next class until it is time for them to go in. Being a new assistant, the children were testing the water to see how much they could get away with. Not much. The main affair this week was the biscuit drama: “Miss Lauren, can we have a biscuit?” My first problem was that I wasn’t aware of the biscuits’ existence...arising from that came my second problem of where the hell were the biscuits kept?! My internal struggle was soon answered with “We know where they are, we can show you.” This immediately weakened my control over the situation but I deigned to let them show me where they were kept and I deduced that if they were asking about biscuits then it must be the usual occurrence. I told them they were allowed a biscuit if they were quiet and well-behaved. This lasted about 50 seconds. Eventually after 25 minutes of fluctuating noise levels, they were quiet for more than two consecutive minutes. They were awarded with a biscuit. I felt I had been firm but fair. All was well until...”Can I have another one?”, “We always have 2″. Of course they do. Well not this week. Was I too harsh? I decided I must find out from authority the exact biscuit quota for next week and come armed with information. About biscuits. Oh dear. Talk about first world problems.

I will leave you with one final old chestnut from this week’s ballet anecdotes. As a new adult you are very interesting to a group of young children and they ask many questions. One particular exchange will always stick with me, the child was about 8 years old:

“What language do you speak?”

“English.”

“What else?”

“Nothing. Just English.”

“What? How many languages can you speak though?”

“One. English”

“You can’t even speak French?”

“No”

“Not even some words?”

“Well yes I know a few words but I can’t speak the language”

“You only speak one language?! (She stared at me in disbelief...with a touch of disgust) I can speak 4. French, Italian, some Arabic, and English”

And now I feel like an inadequate human. I may have many masquerades, but I’ve only got one language. Something I would like to rectify in time. Watch this space.

[laurenosull-blog]

Still smiling after 4 hours in the cold...why? Because we are supporting what is right. Such a happy atmosphere as people from all walks of life came and walked together. #womensmarch #womensmarchlondon #forwardsnotbackwards (at London, United Kingdom)

[laurenosull-blog]

“What do you want to be when you grow up?”

Sitting here at the reception desk this morning it occured to me that I wasn’t aware of more than half of the companies in this office building before I worked here. Perhaps that’s just me being ignorant, but I doubt that everybody working in each of these companies knew about their existence before researching and applying for a job. I suppose what I’m trying to say is that it doesn’t matter if we don’t know exactly where we’ll get a job from, life will present opportunities from far and wide and we must be open-minded. 

Where am I going with this? Well, back to the title of this post. It’s the question we get asked countless times as a little kid, mostly by our parents and their friends expecting cute little replies like, ‘princess’, ‘superman’, or ‘ballerina’. Nobody reads much into those responses and it’s left alone for a while until we start secondary school and begin to study a more exciting range of subjects. At this point some children might have an idea about what they might like to do when they’re older, or at least have a better understanding of what they actually can do. It’s not until we start those dreaded GCSEs that our parents’ probing becomes more serious this time and they start to insist that our choices now will affect what we can choose later on. To some extent this is true. Many subjects at A Level require that you have studied them at GCSE in order to study them now. And at university it helps if you have A Levels in subjects that relate in some way to your chosen course of study. But after you graduate? What happens then? Maybe the subject you chose to study has a very limited number of graduate jobs available. You find yourself looking for job roles that are ‘similar’. You present yourself with your degree and your ‘crossover’ skills that can apply to a wider range of jobs. Suddenly you are applying for jobs that really have nothing to do with what you studied at university and instead require your intuition and a willingness to learn. You develop new skills on the job and begin to really enjoy your work even though you had no idea that this job even existed. What I’m saying is that you can study pretty much anything, and go on to work in a completely different field. One that you maybe have never even heard of, or that you certainly didn’t aim for. So much pressure is put on ‘what we want to be’, but we should just be and see what happens! You can try and predict the future all you want, but if you stop worrying about it so much you can find the freedom to just take opportunities as and when they come. There are so many jobs out there that you can’t ‘study’ for; there is no specific course you can take at university for these jobs. Instead you have to mould your skills, your knowledge and your experiences to adapt to a job. You can do many different things as long as you find purpose in them. Don’t be afraid of variety or change, after all, you don’t want your job to become stale. So don’t worry if what you’re doing right now isn’t what you initially set out to do. I’m certainly not doing what I studied 3 years at Musical Theatre college for at the moment. So many fellow graduates aren’t...think bartender, waitress, hostess, receptionist, (god forbid) promoter. But soon I will be. It’s OK. Do you feel fulfilled? Do you feel confident in your abilities? Can you find purpose in your work? Are you happy? If your answer to those questions is yes then you’ve done it! Maybe I can’t agree with the first question right now, but it’s all about balance; I certainly have the ability to work here, a purpose to earn money so that I can afford to live in London and go to class, and yeah I’m happy. Because isn’t the ultimate answer to the title question of this post just that: ‘to be happy’?

[laurenosull-blog]

Title

Why 'A Performer's Masquerade?' It was my innovative and interesting way of describing my current situation: A Musical Theatre graduate sat at a reception desk. This is my masquerade. I am Lauren the receptionist by a few months of the year, Lauren the dancer/actor/singer/model by the rest of the year. This isn't a blog for me to moan or whinge about it; I don't see it as a negative thing. It is a necessity. And while I could sit here idly for 9 hours a day and scroll through social media sites slowly numbing my brain, I have chosen to write little anecdotes about my situation, which I see as rather amusing. Take for example: just this second, a man walked straight into the sliding glass doors...he soon found out that they are not automatic, you must in fact push a button to make them open which he then spent 30 seconds looking around for. See what I mean? Amusing. So here it is...a little insight into my double life. 

The office workers hurry past my desk, Starbucks and a Pret sandwich in hand, completely oblivious as to my true profession. They see me and smile, that knowing sympathy smile that says: 'Bless you, I'm glad that's not me.' I smile back my best receptionist smile, playing the role with sublime sophistication. This is day 26 of an ongoing run that is yet to have a confirmed end date. It's proving rather successful; they keep calling me back for re-runs. In theory I could be sent out to one of many office buildings in London that my company looks after. However, I have only been to two different places so far and I seem to be particularly needed at this specific one. It is the ideal place for me to write my memoirs: I basically don't have anything to do. In fact, come to think of it, I act more like a guard (that's just another layer to my many masquerades). I keep watch. 

My return to London is still bitingly fresh after a wonderful Christmas spent at home with my family, a rare treat in the life of a performer (last year I spent Christmas in South Africa working on a cruise ship). I've been thrust back into the daily grind in a somewhat bumpy fashion. It's Monday, I'm back playing the receptionist and my first objective is getting to work. You'd think that was easy right? Throw into the mix a tube strike and suddenly it seems beyond the bounds of possibility. Get a bus? Yeah, so is everyone else. Uber fares went up by four times... There was only one option: man power. I borrowed my flatmate's bike, psyched myself up, and joined the fluorescent lycra-clad pack hurtling down the cycle superhighway. I was suddenly 'Lauren the cyclist'. Oh yeah people, multi-roling at its best. Despite not having the right costume for my role, I think I fared pretty well...on the way into work. Cycling home wasn't as successful due to the rain, so torrential at one point that I took shelter under a railway bridge praying that it would get lighter. It eased up a little and I was home and dry, or so I thought. The lift wasn't working. Three flights of stairs later and I was home, and actually not very dry. 

My flatmates think I'm slightly crazy but they seem to find my real job exciting, asking things like, "Did you get to keep the costumes?", "Have you got the feathers hiding in your suitcase?", "Was it hard work?"...no ladies there are no feathers hiding in my suitcase but yes, it's bloody hard work. But why would I want it to be easy? I love working hard, I love pushing my body, and I love investing my emotions into performing day in and day out. And when I finish a contract and maybe I'm not performing for a while it's hard. But that is the beauty of being my own boss. I can still workout and push my body, I can still go to class and develop my craft and invest emotionally. It never really stops. So while I sit here behind a reception desk I'm safe in the knowledge that I can continue investing in and developing my passion. It's my own little secret that keeps me smiling, the condescending smiles of the office workers bouncing off the surface of my masquerade. 

So this my blog. About the little tales and anecdotes of London life through my receptionist mask. Let the multi-roling begin...