laz, laza, lazae

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[feyburner]

I do think it’s funny when headcanons are presented as objective character facts bc I get “He would not fucking say/do that” as much as the next guy but I must also humbly acknowledge its powerful cousin named “A skilled enough writer could make me believe he would”

[ineptshieldmaid]

I posit a third category: “I’m tentatively open to believing he would do that but I’ve taken a chance on 3-10 fics and noped out every time”.

Subtypes/conclusions:

- turns out he would not do that

- the people who firmly believe he would do that are not sufficiently skilled

and

- I’m going to have to write it myself

[passengerprincipessa]

i’m so tired of being told that what female fans want in men’s sports is more fashion and champagne and over the top displays of wealth and wag content when really what women want is, like, a sport where the managers and players and marketers and male fans aren’t raging misogynists

[namunii]

No photo gets deleted anymore.

PS. Yes, I want them to be the sappiest husbands ever, wearing each other's merch and all that (in case it's not clear, Ilya's phone is the one on the right... again, sappy husbands)

[namunii]

Heated Rivalry but make it a 2000s animated series / cartoon

[ilyashaneconnorhudson]

x

[hollanovhaunting]

I need someone to write a fic where

1) Shane is moving to the Cens and it actually IS very awkward and the Cens are not lovely and wholesome right off the bat because

2) there is a widespread misunderstanding when Shane and Ilya get outed where the Cens, missing ALL of the context, are assuming that Shane must’ve been a shit partner with how rough Ilya was doing this past season and assume that Shane was *forcing* Ilya to stay closeted because he’s *ashamed* of Ilya and their relationship

3) Shane is actually pretty hurt by the Cens being cold and distant with him but doesn’t complain about it because literally everyone else ever has behaved like that towards him in his life except for Ilya, Rose, and the Pikes. He’s very much like “well well look who’s inside again” about it.

4) Ilya doesn’t realize the Cens are thinking Shane is BadTM because he’s wrapped up in how happy he is to have Shane around now. He actually does not realize any of this is happening until their first week of practice as a new team and he sees his team icing his husband out

5) Ilya tries to talk to Shane about it but Shane is very much like “don’t worry Ilya this is normal and I’m fine cause I have you” and it makes Ilya want to kill the Metros three times over

6) Shane also agrees with the Cens about himself being a shitty husband when he hears the reasoning behind their behavior. So he just decides to work hard at being a husband and a teammate and keep his head down.

7) Ilya doesn’t know what to do. Shane is adamant that he doesn’t want Ilya to confront the team and that he can’t control what others think about him and he doesn’t want it to be a big deal. But Ilya is also seeing Shane be as sad and withdrawn as he was last season and is actively getting worse- being more strict than ever about his diet, constantly working out and straining himself, being first on the ice and last to leave

8) some of the Cens slowly start realizing that they have Shane wrong over more time with him- mainly Luca, Troy, Harris, Wyatt, and Bood. But they have put walls up that they don’t know how to tear down without spooking Shane.

9) The rest of the team don’t realize how shitty this must be for Shane until the Cens go up against the Metros and they realize that they’ve been treating Shane the same way his old and terrible teams did- they watch as Shane takes scathing insults with a blank face, gets back up without a word after being smashed against the boards, gives a polite smile (the same smile he’s given them when they’re being passive aggressive) when receiving glares and threats from his ex teammates.

10) idk it can go many ways from here- Shane gets hurt and has to leave the ice and the teams finds him genuinely upset and they all have a confrontation- or the Metros target Ilya and the Cens see Shane lose his shit and how in love and protective he is- or the Cens stop icing him out after this and slowly start to actually get to know him and maybe apologize. Idk. The world is your oyster or whatever. I just want Protective Cens but it Backfires Pretty Badly.

11) Bonus points if Ilya eventually confronts them and then, when he hears their reasoning, is very much like “you??? Hurt my husband??? For me??? He wasn’t a bad partner??? I have depression??? Is chemical imbalance not abuse???????” And is absolutely pissed lmao

[deja-b00]

somehow it comes up that troy had a crush on shane and was going to ask for his number. and after troy gets ribbed by his teammates and ilya makes a big scene, shane is like, “well i never would’ve gone out with you lol.”

and troy smiles, “right, because you were with roz the whole time.”

“i mean, yes, but also because you and dallas kent spent years calling me and jj ‘rush hour’ and asking hayden if his wife was his beard to cover up for his big gay relationship with me.”

the rest of the centaurs blink. harris puts his head in his hands and groans.

and troy’s like, “oh. right. sorry about that :/“

[jewelcoatfish]

i also read a post that the cens being awkward and cold to shane at first bc they think he’s the reason ilya’s sad and withdrawn from the team, so i’d love for these both to come into play where the cens have to face the truth that not only was shane suffering from a lot more than they can imagine, one of their beloved teammates was the direct instigator and cause for him being afraid of coming out.

i think it would be harris, during one of the cens get together, when they’re all a bit tipsy and harris asks is troy awkward around shane because he used to have a crush on shane, and after wooing and teasing sounds this scene occurs.

it was wyatt, iirc, that played with troy and saw how he behaved, and it really put into perspective to him if that the environment was making troy, a gay person, behave like a bigoted asshole, so how would it treat shane, who is not only a poc but also closeted and in a relationship with his rival for 3 years.

i don’t think ilya knows the extent of bad treatment shane underwent either, because for the first 7 years of them involved they didn’t talk about feelings, and the next 3 they were under so much pressure of keeping everything up and running there was just too much to pinpoint a specific instance, and so at that point he was like, hmph, maybe shane not wanting me to come out to troy before made sense.

[philcollinsenjoyer]

about 90% of fanfiction takes place in a utopia where men are thoughtful and unsure of their place in the world

[mycatismyfriend]

@skulandcrossbones this might be the greatest tag on a reblog I’ve ever seen.

[semiconductiveshanehollander]

i think it’s a common misconception that shane can’t chirp or he’s bad at it or anything like that because truly all he ever does IS chirp.

‘you’ll look great in silver vaughny’

‘well i don’t think it’s worth jumping over’

‘sorry in advance too, we’re gonna kick your ass tonight’

‘fuck you’ (like 30 times)

because really his mask was built around his environment which was almost entirely hockey. all of that is from dozens of times someone said something to him and he had nothing to come back with until finally he figured it out. what he doesn’t have a great grasp on for most of the series is vulnerable and open communication and when he finally does it’s a lot clunkier cause he’s not really used to it. those aren’t things born and nurtured on locker rooms or on ice — both between the players and the audience — so he’s very assured in his ability to bite back since he’s needed to be for years.

but he doenst INSTIGATE. because another big part of his character is that he can’t be loud or obnoxiously mean or erratic and be afforded the same loving reputation that ilya (a white, non-autistic man) is given freely for the same behaviour. he needed to be able to bite back because everyone was always biting at him and it resulted in a situation where most of his responses are, in some form, chirps or chirpish since thats been probably 90% of the interactions he’s had with his peers.

that’s why scott said he sounded like ilya, because he was instigating, and i think shane only even did it because he felt safe with scott. scott was his mentor who has historically been nice and patient with him and so he was trying to rib with him in the same way he does with rose or ilya. he’s being a little mean, but he’s always being a little mean.

scott saying that wasn’t just personal or uncalled for, it was genuinely a betrayal that i don’t think shane will ever fully over no matter how much he wants to.

[thisfeebleheart]

pinned down and so happy about it

[thisfeebleheart]

these tags are amazing thank you @fuckrozanov

[bloominflowers]

Mushroom witch and her little mushroom friends

[bebx]

“if you love this character then you must make him happy in your fics, right?” wrong. the horror. suffering. internal hemorrhage. hospital. immediately

[northstarfan]

Blorbos these days are so coddled. I my day, they were lucky if they were allowed to drag themselves to an abandoned cave. Hospital - pah!

[northstareclipse]

Hyper-individualist cultures go, “Your emotions are your personal responsibility. Don’t burden others. Regulate privately. Maintain functionality. If you’re upset, process it offstage so the machine keeps moving.” Meanwhile certain collectivist or harmony-focused frameworks go, “Your emotions disrupt group cohesion. Don’t create discomfort. Don’t impose disharmony. Transcend or contain your reactions for the sake of the whole.”

Different mythology, same trembling fear that one person saying “actually, I feel terrible” will cause civilization to peel apart like wet drywall.

[shadowgremlin]

My wife’s idea of decompressing after the busy holiday was to rearrange every piece of furniture in our home is this an ADHD thing or just a her thing

I’m not complaining the way she’s done it is much better than it was it’s just like how is this your idea of a relaxing weekend

[kaity--did]

Listen I don't get to decide when the drunk elf that is my executive actually does the functioning but when he does we have a SMALL WINDOW OF TIME before he finds the schnapps again and we're done

[honeysbunchesofoats]

[kaity--did]

yes this exactly

[luminouspica]

So to me, there are spoons (general energy cost) and carnival tickets (specific energy cost).

Spoons can be used pretty much anywhere.

Carnival tickets are only good for the carnival, and it’s only in town for a limited amount of time.

So like, if I get “kitchen cleaning” carnival tickets, I can’t use that to clean my bedroom, that’s not where the carnival is.

[lingonberry24]

phrase added to permanent vocabulary

[hachinana87]

Joe

[tarantula-hawk-wasp]

the moon and my man...

[wilmvandrr]

just married!!!