disabled ppl we need to start lying to nosy people okay? you tell me i'm too young to need a cane and i will tell you point blank that maybe you should tell that to the guy who ran me over. you don't get an explanation of my health issues you get lies and depending on how much of an asshole i want to be that lie will be anything from a humble car crash to a 1 billion lions attack. mind yr business.
"i could never live like that" well maybe you'll have to because this happened overnight. yeah you heard me i was the most able bodied man in the world but then one morning bam i woke up disabled. yeah you could have that too. there's no cure either you'll just wake up one morning and now you have to live like me
I have an idea nagging at the back of my mind that’s somewhat demanding to exist. It’s partially based off a conversation I had with my grandpa, and I feel like the lessons could best be represented through Zutoph’s family.
This’ll be a little long.
So warning for musings about parenthood, my own family, and then Zutoph thoughts (primarily focused on Izumi atm).
I’m not a parent but I imagine parenthood is hard. You raise your children (hopefully/idealistically) with the intent for them to be their own person, to be a good person. You put your heart and soul into them but you do so without the intent to control them. Everyday, you learn more about your child and there may be things you like and things you don’t like.
But you love THEM as your child.
I always believed you are a parent for life — yes, you provide their basic needs automatically (food, water, shelter) because how else will they get it? That’s just human decency.
But teaching them empathy, how to sympathize with others, how to love, and what healthy love looks like in return? Apologizing when you’re wrong, letting them hold you accountable, embracing them in their mistakes, showing them what true forgiveness is, and so on — that’s the part of parenthood that never ends. Provision of material things is fine; great, even, because the world runs off material goods and you need them to survive.
But what we need most is compassion for others.
My grandpa taught me a lot about that, and to be honest, when we first started watching ATLA - I saw a lot of Iroh in him. It’s part of what made me cry when Iroh’s original voice actor died. But also made me realize how pivotal Iroh’s influence (though he is flawed and highly regarded but has issues) had on Zuko. Even though I know Iroh is a character of admittedly questionable morals in his past, and perhaps even in his present, it made me realize that’s what parents are like.
I only knew my grandpa as my grandpa. I didn’t know he served in the military, that he was drafted and torn from his life under threat of incarceration or worse. I didn’t know our country treated him with disrespect, that his life was in danger countless times and if he’d made one misstep, was in the wrong place, spoke to the wrong person - we would have never met.
I didn’t know he had ill feelings towards others; that he could be unkind, that he could express terrible things, and that he felt such remorse in his past failings that he’d admit them to me only so I could learn to be better. All I remember was the man who loved me so much that I would never have realized we weren’t related by blood until he told me himself.
So what did all of this have to do with Zutoph family?
A lot; actually.
I’m thinking about how Izumi, Lin, and Suyin view the elders in their family — not just Zuko, but Toph, Iroh, Ursa, Ikem, Kiyi, Azula, Lao, Poppy, and even Ozai. I know I focus quite a bit on Izumi at the moment but that’s partially because she is the start.
There can be so much talked about regarding the eldest daughter in different cultures. How the firstborn is the one who starts the line and all who follow are (hopefully) improved upon. In Izumi, I just see the beginning of a new cycle. I consider a lot from her perspective, how she sees her family as such but gets to know who they truly are beyond the title. How her parents remain her parents while having their individualism in tact, and how she grapples with understanding who she is.
Iroh’s question of: “Who are you? And what do you want?” still persists and honestly, Izumi could benefit from hearing it as well.
To have that guidance to grow up into the person I can’t wait to write one day once the building blocks are laid down.
But to round it out, the idea in my mind came from my grandpa revealing a little of our family history. How he left his work and stayed home for three years to raise my older brother so my grandmother wouldn’t have to. How he loved his wife and wanted to share the responsibility of raising the next generation with her, even if we weren’t his by blood.
An open secret, but unknown to the children who were the family of his heart.
So imagine with me; for three years, Toph raises Izumi in the gradually growing Republic City, away from the court eager to meld her to their wants, away from the monsters who would try to steal or murder an infant to reclaim a regime of bloodshed and destruction, away from Zuko.
But she’s not alone. The man who was like a father to her when her own was not, who told her he didn’t love her because he just met her yet she knows now he adores her, shows up and just doesn’t leave.
And eventually, a soldier boy set on a throne travels across the sea to come home.
Random thought but I was comparing little parallels in Azula and Izumi’s devotion to their fathers, and how it reflects their father’s parenting of them.
While I’m sure Azula respected her father, there was a part of her that was afraid of falling out of favor with Ozai. She knew what that looked like and the consequences of failure. Aside from her sense of pride and value in her excellence, if she didn’t perform well, the results would be dire. So while there was likely love because of the favoritism, it was rooted ultimately in respect granted through fear.
On the opposite end, there is Izumi who adores her father. She openly contradicts him and doesn’t feel as if she had to bow to him. They discuss issues together, and even apologize to one another for slights. The love she hold for Zuko is capable of withstanding her awareness of his shortcomings, and the moments she doesn’t measure up to what (she thinks) he wants her to.
It’s just interesting to me because Lin and Suyin’s relationship with their father is ultimately different because they are considered earth first and fire second. But for Izumi, the Fire Nation itself tries to dismiss her earthen heritage and hold her firmly to the Tenets of the Flame because they need her to be the next sovereign (since Toph and Zuko won’t have any other children).
But unlike Azula, Izumi doesn’t have to fear losing her father’s love if she isn’t the perfect heir.
atla wallpapers that i drew while listening to the lofi version of the avatar soundtrack! save them, use them, tag me if you do, maybe? i’d love to see!
