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Andulka
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gracie abrams

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Cosmic Funnies

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Sweet Seals For You, Always
Mike Driver
Claire Keane
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Jar Jar Binks Fan Club
Aqua Utopiaïœæ”·ăźćșă§èšæ¶ă玥ă
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EXPECTATIONS
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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@lcnny-blog
âI suppose it doesnât help that they all practically adored you, anyway. You were like this little angel compared to me and my friends. Singing at school plays, putting the rest of us to shame. No, no, it was good though, especially when I was teaching myself how to play the guitar. You were the first girl I ever performed with. Kinda miss the guitar some days. It just reminds me too much of Evelyn now.â He wasnât aware of what happened to Lennon when he left for London and fell in love with the illustrious Cassie/Evelyn who broke his heart all those years ago when he was 18. But then again, Logan never really did pay much attention to anything that wasnât spelt out to him. He was always dumb that way, never really did see what was happening in front of him. âAnd then there was Scarlett. No, I think the guitar holds too much lost memory for me, I always end up playing the same stupid songs I used to sing them.â The man chuckled and drew his hand through his hair. âIâm much better at it now, youâll have to see the furniture I made for my new home. I even made Isabelle a jewelry box for Christmas. Yeah, she hated it when I spent time with you but it wasnât like she ever really won those arguments - she was too scared Alex would tell me to break up with her. Nine times out of ten it usually worked. Canât be with someone my mates hate. Well, there might always be a hot tub situation⊠Great! Iâll give them a call and see when I can come over next.â
   âHow could they not have adored the little sunflower in the spring program? Or Cindy Lou Who during Christmastime? I always nailed my performance of Where Are You Christmas, it was always a showstopper.â Her face lit up, she always tended to get that way when he talked her up. Though, her face slightly fell when he mentioned Evelyn. There was an eye-roll that always followed when he said her name, the occasional groan. âYouâre stopping because of Evelyn? Thatâs pretty bogus, Lo. Especially for someone as talented as you are. You shouldnât hold back your talent for her, she isnât worth that.â Watching Logan get his heart broken over those girls was enough to drive her crazy, watching the boy sheâd always been crazy for. Her little school crush that was always something more -- for usually just her. There had always been different girls, sheâd always seemed to go un-noticed. âI havenât played in a while -- but how about we learn a new song together? You shouldnât stop playing music because of some silly girls.â Who was she to talk? She hadnât played a note or sang a tune since the passing of her biological mother. âYouâre a craftsman now too? What canât you do? -- And yet you were still with her even when you knew that I didnât like her. Mm, a hot-tub. Maybe in the near future. Iâll be sure to clear my overly-abundant schedule for you.âÂ
âDamn, maybe my grandmother does like you better than she likes me. You always were the good one, I was always too busy sneaking off with girls. Somehow she still thinks Iâm pure â not sure where she gets that idea from. No way, she didnât? I had enough of that with my mom, now I gotta deal with her showing them off too? What else has she been telling you? Oh geez, Sophie in The Valleys? No way â sheâd be eating these boys alive. She already liked teasing my friends when we were younger, now all my friends are old and I donât want to know what happens then. That shed was the bomb, remember when I tried building that shitty treehouse when we were 15? And I ended up breaking my fucking arm because I was using rotten, stolen wood from my dad? Honestly⊠well, at least Iâm better at it now. Iâll try again some day, build a proper treehouse, really big one that we can have parties in and everything. She was a bit of a bitch, wasnât she? I think even I hated her. We only dated for like a month, though. I donât even know why I liked her, she just never left me alone and because she was popular I felt like Iâd be ostracized if I said no. That and I guess she did have pretty nice boobs. Itâs a shame weâre in London, not too much excuse to take my clothes off here, youâre gonna be missing out, Lenny. Fine â we should go to a petting farm or something. Come with me to the shelter some time to see the pups.â
   âThereâs no maybe to it, buster. She loves me much more, I mean, she has every right to. I talk to her, help her with tea, make sweets with her, and laugh with her about her grandson. What else would she want? You? Pure? Not that youâre some sexual maniac, but youâre certainly not pure. Little Logie in the bath tub will be one of my favorites, with your little bubble Santa beard. Sophie would never be safe with these boys around, Styles would try and make moves on her. The rustic shed was such an eye pleaser, wasnât it? That damn treehouse, you were so determined that you were going to make it and all I ended up with was helping carry your books to class for the next month and a half. You milked that for the longest time, I swear I wanted to hate you for it. We can purchase brand new wood and actually do it right --.. or weâll just get half way through and get too tired. I always want to see if that she is still there. She was such a pain in the ass. Trying to get you to spend less time with me, looking at me like I was some red-headed step child. She did have some pretty tits though, I was jealous. I donât think itâs fair how I always had to watch you with all these girls and boys didnât even like me enough for you to be bothered with watching me have an obnoxious boyfriend on my arm. How will I ever get a chance to see your six-pack now? Guess Iâll just never have another opportunity, what a shame. Iâll have to find a way. Please, that would be so great.âÂ
t e x t || l e n n o n
Layla: I'll be in the house
Layla: I just need a place to get away when things get too much I guess
Lennon: oh okay, that should be good for you
Lennon: you definitely need a place for that.
âYou been taking advantage of my grandmother without me around? I hear youâve been hanging out with Sophie, getting into all sorts of trouble with my sister now, are you? I actually need to stop by and visit her before she ends up here instead. Still innocent as ever, are you Lennon? It was - I remember that round of truth or dare we forced upon each other. Shit, I miss being a kid, donât you? That fuckinâ farm in Holmes where we used to drink frosty jacks and think we were âcool kidsâ. I always had some random girlfriend â do you remember Jennifer Balington? What a chin she had on her. Iâm disgusted with myself, the photos on my facebook are horrific. What, was that you watching our previous season in Hawaii? I do recall being topless an awful lot over there. What if it was an adorable yet rabid little bunny? HehâŠI mean, yeah, I suppose I aged pretty decent. Havenât had complaints, yet.
  "Oh, absolutely. We get together all the time, didnât you know that? Share some tea, talk about little baby Logan, and even if Iâm lucky, she brings out the old baby pictures. Your little baby bottom is the cutest. Speaking of Soph, I hate to let you know that sheâs moved ahead of you in my list too. I think I might invite her on over here, I need my partner in crime back by my side. Maybe not too innocent, I do like to walk on the wild side.  Have both tea and coffee, have dessert before dinner, yâknow -- crazy stuff. Being a kid was so much simpler, right? Sitting on top of the roof of that old shed, thinking we were something special because only we knew how to get to the roof. You always had a girl, never remembered a time when you werenât single for a longer period of time -- If Iâm being honest, she was my least favorite of them all. Thatâs what I focused on the most, didnât you know? Your smokinâ hot body on my television. Thatâd be cruel, donât you think? How about a less rabid bunny? Oh yeah, just decent. Yâknow, not too shabby.â
That I am. Still got eighteen months left. Well currently the effect of renin-adenosine compounds on the kidney. Thereâs been more interesting things I have to admit. You strike me as a latte kind of girl.
   Eighteen months? I donât see how you can do that. --..That sounds mighty complicated, but I donât know much about that topic. I am definitely a latte kind of girl.Â
t e x t || o p e n
Layla: can you maybe get back to the house? and help me move into my new appartment?
Layla: i literally have no upper body strength
Lennon: sure, yeah, i can help
Lennon: new apartment? are you not going to be staying in the house?
The âcafe au lait drinking, scarf wearing, black and white Instagram filter hipsterâ mood? Iâve seen it cling to some of our castmates.  I have yet to try the coffee here, but Iâm betting itâs not going to be strong enough. Iâll tag along, though.
    âNot particularly -- just the âIâve not written a piece of music in at least three months and Iâve suddenly got the urgeâ kind of mood. Tea is the strong suit, but I am craving the taste of coffee so tea just wonât cut it.Â
âI wouldnât want to impose on your artistic moment here, Lenny. You sure youâre for a break? Iâm most definitely up for a cuppa if you can really tear yourself away. Besides, I still think weâve got lots of lost time to be making up for.â
   âImpose as much as youâd wish, I donât mind at all. I think I need a break for a while, Iâve just been jotting down certain lyrics here and there. We do, there is plenty that weâve both got to catch up on.âÂ
âConfidence, Lennon, cocky is such a harsh term, donât you think? Thatâs exactly it, Iâll always be around someway or another. Shouldâve thought about this more carefully before you signed up, yâknow. Damn, hopefully you get past it soon, itâd be a shame to lose out on too much of all that potential youâre hogging â.. Now now, Knox, if I didnât know any better I would say it sounds like youâre trying to flirt with me. You gotta be gentle with this fragile heart of mine.â
   âCockiness is a hard term to escape when it applies to you so well.  Youâre going to be like that Geico commercial with stack of money that stalks everyone --..except, well, youâre no stack of Benjamins. I donât know, I -- who knows? Maybe Iâll get back t oit someday, it just doesnât feel right. You think that I am flirting with you? Youâre so full of yourself..â
So this is what this show has converted people to - from shot glasses to pens. Either youâre completely out of character for this kind of show or Iâve whisked myself up to some âdead poets societyâ meets âthe sleepover clubâ twisted fantasy. I think Iâll pass. Iâm afraid you might mistaken a chapel for a coffee shop and have us roll our several Hail Mary for my sins.Â
   âFor Christâs sake -- I am a musician, I write, and I certainly donât see anything wrong with that. Anyone with half a brain wouldnât give a damn about that.âÂ
âJust for your slick little compliment right there, I suppose I can forget about the fact that you never even told me about hopping on a plane to London. Câmere, Lenny, Iâve missed your ass ââ
   âI wanted to surprise you, Al. How could I miss out on spending time with you now that youâre in London? Itâd be so uncalled for -- God, Iâve missed you so much -- You have no idea how much Iâve missed you.â
âHow cliche. Donât get me wrong, Iâm sure youâre quite the intelligent girl, but being a writer in London isnât exactly the most original thing. Yawn. Could this day get any more boring? Iâm glad you offered that cup of tea because I was feeling my brain slowly turn to mush whist watching the camera crew try and figure out how to screw in a light bulb. Where are we headed? Perhaps the most popular cafe? You seem like a sweet girl, really. But Iâm caution of whom Iâm going to be seen with. After all, this is a reality television, correct? Majority of the people here are the bottom feeders in the entertainment industry looking for a little screen time. Iâve been used in the past. So if youâre looking to swirl dating rumours or land on the cover of some desperate magazine than Iâm your man.â
  â --..Iâm a musician who lives in London. Who gives a shit about it being original? Why does it even make me unoriginal? Thatâs bullshit. --..So, wait, are you wanting rumors to come about? I mean, I could really care less, I know what it feels like -- but, if you want to get tea at some popular cafe, I donât care.âÂ
âReally? Thatâd be fucking awesome, I love you. Oh, thatâs a bit disappointing. Is there any way I can help out?â
  âYou and I can get up to some mischief of our own for once. I love you too, my darling. Just keeping myself busy and distracted, as poor as that seems sometimes.âÂ
âShe doesnât see you all the time, come on now, itâs not like you live in a hidden spare room in my grandmothers home. If she doesnât know about me being on a TV show, then she doesnât know about all the naughty things Iâve seen you get up to. Or about that time we stole alcohol from our parents. You donât think Iâd rock a dad-bod? You been looking at me without a dad-bod, then? Hmm, curious. I totally do, I can set animals on my enemies. I know, it feels kind of like an eternity. You certainly grew.â
  âWho knows? Maybe we shared a monthly visit together while weâve been living in the same place. You never know, Lo, you never know. Naughty things? Iâve not been the naughtiest person around here. God -- that was a good time, wasnât it? I am not sure how you would handle a dad bod. -- Youâve got me backed into a corner now, havenât you? I mightâve glanced maybe once or twice, itâs only human nature. Set some sort of animal on me and youâre dead meat, Logan OâConnor. Life did me pretty well, didnât it? And you? You look -- you look good, really good.â