Is This Thing On..?

[le--vide]

Dear le--vide,

Theres a pain in my throat that won't go away; a scab I keep picking at, that ultimately won't heal. Everyone's who handled my heart has dropped it in some way or another. Maybe it's time to put it on a shelf.

[le--vide]

Just smile & say goodnight✨

[le--vide]

Dear le--vide.

Do no harm; but take no sh!t.

[le--vide]

Dear Le'Vide,

Am I stupid for staying? One moment im fine and thankful to have them. The next I'm simmering in a bitter black hole of self loathing jealously.

Should I leave?

Do I leave it alone.

Oh Le'Vide, what should I do!?

What is love anyway? Do anyone actually know the answer??

[le--vide]

Dear Le'Vide

I think I was called fat yesterday. In her own words she said asked what I eat for lunch, and that fast food isn't good and that I should pay my family extra to eat lunch with them.

I over indulged in PP, I may have out in a couple sounds. Worth it tho. I had steak twice -for less than 10 buck each time tho.

Anyway , Le'Vide I have not appittite but I know I need to eat something. Anything. But nothing's sounds okay to. Between you and me I can just not eat, and call it a fast to make me feel better about myself.

I need to lose a few pounds anyway.

It's a chicken chimichanga. It was delicious.

[le--vide]

You ever felt like shit just keeps going left only to find out everything was going the right way all along?

What is that?

[le--vide]

Pretty sure I'm depressed.

Welcome to shrug city P.

🤷🏾‍♀️

[le--vide]

"After a while you learn the subtle difference

Between holding a hand and chaining a soul,

And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning

And company doesn’t mean security,

And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts

And presents aren’t promises,

And you begin to accept your defeats

With your head up and your eyes open

With the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child,

And you learn to build all your roads on today,

Because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans,

And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.

After a while you learn

That even sunshine burns if you get too much.

So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul,

Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.

And you learn that you really can endure…

That you really are strong,

And you really do have worth.

And you learn and learn…

With every goodbye you learn."

Veronica Shoffstall, “After a While.”

Art by Cameron Grey

[le--vide]

Where did IT go? Perhaps fell off with my incompetence of how a relationship is

Supposed

To work.

Either way, please..

Just touch me. With

Out

Me having to ask.

[le--vide]

Bon Nuit LeVide!!

Sometimes you have to wait

in the dark

For what seems like forever

Stuck

Certain no progress is being made,

not even a little growth

Nothing seems alive

You, least of all

It doesn’t even feel like waiting, truth be told,

Since waiting implies an end in sight —

and you haven’t seen one of those

in ages.

You’re sure you’ve been abandoned

Forgotten

It seems as though your own soul may have deserted you

But then one day

A day you didn’t think would come —

"The smallest of cracks appears

Then the crack turns into an opening

Then the opening a breaking free.

Maybe it was the way the sun hit,

or how the rain fell

or the planets aligned

or maybe something deep within you simply knew: NOW.

But it’s not just that you’ve come back to life

You’re different.

The life within you feels humbler, since you know you know less now.

And more grounded, since your roots were growing deep all this time.

There was something happening, you understand now

something profound

in that slow and tedious germination.

It’s a miracle, isn’t it?

How even in the longest and most brutal of winters

thousands of seeds are plotting

a most magnificent spring.

-Leyla Aylin

Art by Shanna Trumbly

Elena Mateeva

[le--vide]

Hello again, it's been some time; hasn't it, LeVide?

Some time for sure. In which, I've seem to have lost my mind, self, and marbles. I do plan for their safe return. When the Sun is brightest, and the Moon shines with no shame.

I can barely hear myself when it's quiet; I can't think in the chaotic trenches of these 4 walls. -dreadfully color, I might add.

Perhaps one day - some time, sanity will find me.