Sight Unseen

Canadian girl who loves being happy but is mostly sad. Loves pretty words. Grieving. Virgo. INFJ. Slytherin. Bisexual. Registered Nurse. Drarry. ...I ship the ships.

[jennsens]

Eric Kripke on “Dream a Little Dream of Me” SPN 3.10 DVD extra + S4 Gag Reel for the Jason costume

[leannaemgee]

<3

Pealing laughter, Colour coming back into the world, Plans for the future, Late nights, Early mornings, Compliments, Stolen moments, Wishing, Hoping,  Breathing,  Living;  Love.  . . .  -L

[leannaemgee]

Changing Seasons

The clouds come Bleak as always.  The leaves drop, The nights chill.  The coolness contagious, Always calling to some part of me; Begging me to join.  To exist in the cool, the grey, the bleak.  To forget the warmth of the sun And the joy of living.  To drown in the changing seasons and to let them drag me under with them.  Will I let them?  Should I let them?  . . . -L

Changing Seasons

[leannaemgee]

I Wasn’t Ready

I woke up today, Mad at the trees for knowing when to change their colours; For allowing the seasons to change.  Gone is their warm green splendour Turned a golden autumn hue.  Cool nights, cooler mornings.  Hellos, goodbyes.  New beginnings, farewells.  The sweetness of summer replaced with the crispness of fall.  The seasons don’t mind readiness, they’ll come and go without us.  I…

[leannaemgee]

Anxiety

My mind spirals again, Thoughts streaming around like smoke trying to find a crack. A crack in the work I do daily to hold it all together. But now the work seems as if mortar to bricks; Fallible over time. I’ve no leg to stand on.  Only one constant: Anxiety.  . . . -L

[leannaemgee]

A Beginning Without You

The leaves start to fall, It’s August. The mornings are cool, The winds are changing. Blowing in fall crispness, And another autumn in my heart. Preparing for the end, A beginning without you. It feels impossible that the cool chill will come without the warmth of you in my life. How did we get here? Again. Our own dreamland. All good affairs must come to an end. . . . -L

[leannaemgee]

I Don’t Want to Know

What would it be to live without you? At this point I don’t want to know. My life was dark before I met you And you were the brilliant sun. Why would I even want to consider going without those sunny days, though now they are few and far between. Infusing me with warmth still to this day, I live for those sunny days. Dreadful though the following cloudy days may seem, the momentary gleam…

[leannaemgee]

Waiting

I can’t wait for you anymore. Not in dreams, In sleeping, Not at midnight. Yet still, I will. For you, I’d wait an eternity, For our inevitability- forever. You’re that missing piece of my soul so how could any wait be too long? How could I not wait when you keep coming back to me? I’ll be there. I’ll meet you at midnight. I’ll keep waiting. . . . Hope this finds you well, -L

[leannaemgee]

You Again

Here you are again, Meeting me in dreams. Dreams that try to blur reality But the harshness of daylight takes no prisoners. Meeting you in dreams, Again, Feels like finally being able to breathe; Feels like the missing piece of my soul has clicked back into place. It’s better than any high a drug could offer me. It’s because I’ve never loved anyone as much as I loved that boy, that you,…

[leannaemgee]

Thanks, December

I want to die again Thanks, December.  The year weighing heavily on me; The new one even heavier.  The sins of the past, The mistakes of the future.  Digging myself out or digging myself under?  Time passing me by,  Life drifting on its way.  Here I stay, No longer moving forward.  Always looking behind,  Stuck dreading ahead.  Trying to breathe through the fog I feel in my…

Thanks, December

[leannaemgee]

I hate it here

[godkms]

what a beautiful horrible thing to feel so much

[leannaemgee]

I am Not Endless

Sitting alone, Sad, In my kitchen. Trying to make sense of how Something that once gave me life Now is taking it from me. Endlessly draining, Except, I am not endless. I only have so much to give, Only so much to sacrifice. Make it stop; The taking, the stealing, the keeping. Stealing my sleep, Keeping my joy, Taking my life. I am not endless. . . . Hope this finds you…

[leannaemgee]

How Much Longer/Killing Me

Is it killing me quickly or killing me slowly? Killing me, Regardless. Squeezing the air from my lungs, Dulling all colours to grey; Killing me. How long can I go without breathing full breaths? How much longer without a good night’s rest? My soul slowly being dragged down to the dirt as the last of my breath leaves me. Leaving only this ache in my chest, Killing me. . . . Hope this…

[leannaemgee]

Glass House

I feel like I’m living in a glass house; like everyone walking by me can see me falling apart, can see the hole in my chest, and can see how much of a wreck I am. Because of you. I can’t let people close to me, I can’t let them in. They might take one look at my tired eyes and see right through me. They might see all this pain, This turmoil, These crashing waves. They might see it…

[leannaemgee]

Panic Attack / Through Me

I can feel this anxiety crashing through me Like a tumultuous storm. Pushing, pulling, raging Through me. Energy looking for an exit. I can taste it on the back of tongue, Acrid and thick like thunder and lightning.  Looking for an exit, Building until it breaks me.  The waves rushing through me; Tears from my eyes,  vomit from my mouth,  sobs from my soul.  Anxiety turned to panic…

[leannaemgee]

Homesick

Home to me was never a place, Always a feeling. I let you in and Then Home had a center again. It had its own gravitational pull. I wanted to be home all the time. Without you in my life, Except for one month out of the year, Wanting to go home becomes excruciating. I want to go home. Since home became a person, I’ve never truly had a home. I still have yet to find one, My mind and…