(tw again for extensive discussions of dubiously consensual sexual situations, typical to canon. also spoilers for the decay route update)
was reading this old essay again about andrew and his views towards sex/consent, and especially @/dragomer's great reply, which has led me toward a couple new thoughts:
it has become very clear to me from the decay update that andrew & ashley take after both of their parents in slightly different ways. specifically, while andrew externally presents himself as something a lot more like his father (a doormat, whipped, spineless, passive, useless), internally he aligns much more with his mother (manipulative, temperamental, desperate to appear normal). and while we haven't had as much ashley POV since her all-consuming control of ep1, there are hints that we can assume she is just the opposite-- externally similar to her mother (brash, loud, problem child) but internally more like her father (hesitant, angry but terrified, unable to physically fight back, insecure). there is overlap of course, and neither are exactly like their parents, but the roots of their behavior is clear in the lines of generational trauma that this update has been so incredible at demonstrating.
in particular, going back to this topic of sex and how the characters view it, i think there's an interesting line that we can draw between renee and ashley when it comes to the relationship either character has with not only her own gender and sexuality, but her understanding of how others view her due to it.
the further this series goes on, the more overt and undeniable it becomes that ashley is deeply uncomfortable with even the idea of any kind of mutually pleasurable sexual relationship. instead, ashley often defaults to the idea that sex is something that Must be transactional, Must be something she can use to get something or benefit herself, whether that be making money through sex work or easing her brother's temper and ensuring that he never leaves her.
in my previous essay, i mentioned the idea that what andrew and ashley both ultimately want the most, "is Complete and Utter control over the other," specifically because what they want deep down is safety and the ability to protect themselves from harm. this idea of a desire for control is a large part of why i think ashley is so adamant about sticking to this idea that transactional sex is far superior to/Must exist instead of a more "mutual" relationship-- because in her mind, if it's transactional then she is still the one In Control, who can manipulate the situation in such a way that when she finally gives it up, she is guaranteed to get something out of it. men are shitty and violent and terrible but they have a major weakness in their desire sex, and ashley can hold the temptation of that over them to use them in a way that she can't with the other girls she constantly fails to be friends with.
it's not difficult to see how ashley might've internalized the ways in which she is viewed by others, not only as girl but as sex object and crazy problem child to come to this understanding. to ashley, the idea of a truly "mutual" sexual relationship is straight up fucking impossible, and the idea that she might actually find sex pleasurable is terrifying, because that would just be proof of her own weakness. i'm inclined to interpret her extreme panic after their (in andrew's words) "single great night of drunken sex where she actually seemed to enjoy it," as being a product of this fear, which is clearly exacerbated by andrew's desire for something True and Good and Romantic. (she can also be ace and/or sex repulsed, these things can obviously coexist, but my point is that there's more of a narrative basis for her discomfort here as well, on top of that or alongside it.) ashley thus sees enjoying herself during sex as a weakness to be destroyed, giving up one of the few things that she alone has the ability to use against other people/men-- andrew, on the other hand, wants nothing more than for her to enjoy herself, to fulfill all those highly romanticized expectations of forbidden love that he built up for himself writing all that shitty angst poetry. ("Andrew is a romantic, to an almost neurotic degree," after all.)
for all that ashley barks, it is very clear that she doesn't actually have all that much bite-- unlike andrew, who goes the complete opposite direction in denying his talent for manipulation despite being wayyy more capable than he appears at first glance (see: julia), ashley isn't actually all that skilled at manipulation. most of the supposed "power" that ashley holds over andrew is really just her annoying the shit out of him or chucking herself headfirst into trouble until he gives in and complies or helps her. all of ashley's "power" is thus clearly built on a shaky foundation, especially considering just how much she panics every single time he even seems to Start making a move. for all that she jokingly threatens physical violence, it isn't until both andrew and the demon dream charm start to make it clear that he is legitimately considering killing her that she begins to actually start taking it seriously. sure, she isn't a wholly "innocent victim," or whatever, but while ashley could win olympic gold in the pissing-your-brother-the-fuck-off competition, andrew is often the one that comes across as Actually Fucking Dangerous.
anyways, back to renee: though this hasn't been explicitly stated (iirc), and i expect this to be a point that is likely to be elaborated on further in other future routes, i think there is still a clear line that can be drawn between renee's status as a Teen Mom and ashley's views on transactional sex. more specifically, while their reactions themselves are fairly different, the circumstances under which they are stuck and the external judgement either young lady receives from others seems likely to me to be quite similar.
we get hints in the little time capsule in the backyard that renee was fucking vicious as a teenager, fully prepared to murder douglas's father before they found out she was pregnant-- but she chose to keep the child for the potential he might offer to get them a more normal life, to be a normal family unlike they ones they were forced to have. ashley is treated like a problem child from day one, unable to fit into society or find anyone willing to like her but her brother-- so she chooses to find power in her sexuality as a final hour desperate move to get what she wants, the one thing she and she alone can give up and use to her advantage, so long as she is sufficiently careful about it. in either case, both renee and ashley are judged externally for their value as sex objects above all other possible traits, and attempt to twist this value into something they can use to gain control and an advantage. this is opposed to someone like andrew, for whom sexuality is simply a part of him, something he wants, but also a source of bullying and something that makes him feel powerless (see: the entire school (rightly) assuming that he wants to bone his sister).
gracieabrams
vaporwave
stormborns
turnnoffyourmind
