Misplaced Lens Cap

Kaledo Art
dirt enthusiast
Monterey Bay Aquarium

roma★
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
noise dept.
almost home
tumblr dot com
i don't do bad sauce passes

Product Placement

JVL
Keni

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣

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Cosimo Galluzzi
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$LAYYYTER
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@leviathanzerf
be careful who you call ugly in middle school
I used to masturbate onto birds at a local park. Not a thing that I’m particularly proud of but I became quite good at it. I was taking zinc supplements so I was shooting massive loads and it became something of a sport to me. For anyone interested here is your best strategy. first, you need to find an isolated spot so you don’t become a sex offender. I found a short kind of channel area where I saw the pigeons would congregate. Next, you arouse yourself. I was usually content with envisioning the occasional jogging lady coming over and taking a shit on my chest and that was enough to fuel the fire but if you’re not as sexually charged as me just take some porn on the go. After you’re good an horny, you get some bread. My pigeons preferred white bread but healthier birds might have a taste for honey wheat or maybe even multigrain. Fat, unhealthy birds are slower and easier to hit so remember that. Once you are seated on the bench and ready to do the deed, whip your roosevelt out and scatter bread out within a few feet of you. use your judgement based on how far you know you can cum. I was a lonely and depraved soul who could hit targets the size of a thimble at distances up to 4 feet. You wait for the pigeons to begin eating and to get comfortable with your presence. At this point, you want to coo gently and talk sensually to them to gain their trust. Now you’re finally ready to cum on your bird. This is a tough part because the rapid motion of masturbation is very frightening to the birds, so you have to be subtle. Once you master a technique, you simply wind it up and let it go, aiming depending on your past cumming experiences. I always came high so I would aim for the neck of the bird and catch it right in the face. It’s an extremely satisfying and erotic feeling, seeing those birds reel around covered in cum and maybe even transporting it to other places in the city. Either way I haven’t done it in years but every now and then I catch myself gazing wistfully at a flock of birds, cock throbbing and waiting for them to land close to me.
dark breakfast club
please forget about me
a baby can be born right now at 12:00, on a wednesday, august 24 in new jersey while another baby is also born in the exact same moment but they are born 9:00, on a tuesday, august 23 in california, these babies that are born at the same moment are technically because of time zones, a concept that we created ourselves, born “hours” apart even though really they are born at the same moment just not the same “time”, one will be considered older even though in actuality they are the same
ok so yall may need to take a fucking seat because thERE IS SUCH THING AS PIGEON CHICKENS
forget fiery pits
this is what is in hell
why do thEY EXIST? PRAY FOR ME
i arrive at the function
salmon: smoked
magic deck: shuffled
dick: out
i am forcibly escorted out of the function
a conversation with god.
“You seem like a cool guy”
😂😭😭😭😭 This was a masterpiece
hey man, eat this giant mound of ancient butter i found in the dirt
Do you love the lapels on that ignorance? It really suits you.
What the fuck? All right buddy I’ll be here with my bog butter
who gets angry over a post like this I’m screaming
buddys had it up to here with the bog butter abuse. … now’s the time to make a stand ….