-หหโโโโโ โ ๐๐ฝ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐พ๐ ๐ท๐๐ถ๐๐๐พ๐ป๐๐ ๐พ๐๐โ๐ ๐พ๐ โ
. . . ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐: kissing, drinking, drug use
all my insides felt like they were burning. nothing made sense. nothing
i couldnโt sleep for four days straight, pepsi wasnโt even an option. anytime i tried to eat or drink i felt nauseous straight away and had to go sit in my bathroom for an hour.
โyo dude, are you good?โ matt asks. i nod, slowlyโ not convincing
what was i supposed to tell him though? i think im in love with a girl? i like our next door neighbour?
that all sounded wrong. really wrong.
i pushed myself so far away from her already, there was no going back now.
iโm woken up from my thoughts to the distant chatter downstairs. i groan, turning over on my side to grab my phone, 1:35pm it reads.
i take a stretch with a yawn before pulling the covers off me and getting out of bed, whilst heading towards the bickering i wipe my eyes and pull my hoodie over my head.
โwhere the fuck did you put it nickโ matt yells, rummaging his hands throw a rucksack, โi donโt fucking know, i donโt use it lastโ nick yells back in return.
i sigh, my shoulders dropping whilst i shuffle into the kitchen where theyโre fighting. โchris, look who finally decided to wake up, do youโve any idea what time it is?โ matt asks in annoyance.
โyeah? why do you care?โ i ask. matt wipes a hand over his face before speaking. โare you not going to the beach? for the party tonight?โ he adds on.
shit. i forgot all about that
โoh thatโs tonight?โ i question. matt lets out another dramatic sigh, โyes. dylan has a free house so we are going to his first and then going to the beach tonight for a bonfire. how the fuck did you of all people forget.โ he asks with a scoff.
i roll my eyes, โwhatever manโ i add on before nick yells, โfound it!!!โ he comes running into the kitchen with a bottle of suncream. โfucking finallyโ matt says, putting it in his bag and closing it.
โwhose going tonight?โ i ask. nick sits down, out of breath. โuhh, jake, dylan obviously, me, nathan, you, matt, the whole soccer team, whole cheerleading team, emma, y/n, mikayla, madi, cody, pretty much everyone.โ nicks says,
but i stopped listening as soon as her name fell from his lips.
she was going. y/n. was. going.
i nod my head in response, โcoolโ nick letโs put another sigh, โalright, iโm ready whenever you guys areโ he says. โwell iโm ready whenever mr fucking sleep all day isโ matt says. โwow wow wow no need for attitudeโ i say, holding my hands up in defence.
i take one last look at myself in the mirror reanalysing my outfit for the sixth time. white tee, camo shorts, white cap and white airforce. i open up my bottle of cologne and drench myself in itโ- again.
โlook whoโs finally readyโ matt says. โalright who pissed in your cornflakes today?โ i ask, readjusting my cap. โheโs just mad cause julia rejected him at the last party so now heโs embarrassed to see herโ nick says with a scoff.
โyeah whatever i donโt careโ matt huffs, walking to the front door. โhe doesโ nick whispers behind his hand to me. โi heard that!โ matt yells from the doorframe. i let out a laugh before heading out with them.
we finally reached dylanโs house and by god he was rich as fuck. his parents owned a business in texas so they were never really home. iโm not complaining because we got the best parties out of it.
most of the people are already here, except her. the only reason i come to these fucking parties anymore. i know i messed up with her, badly. the inside of me still burns, i feel like a fire begging for more oxygen to survive.
i make myself comfy on his arm chair out the back by his pool, a cold beer in my hand. a beer that i didnโt want, i never did, a beer i only used to make myself forget her.
i never actually disliked her, at all. i only convinced myself i did because when i knew she liked meโ- i panicked. i panicked so much. i drove myself to change, my appearance, my lifestyle, my friends. everything.
i changed because i was scared. and then i lied to her. i lied to the only true person i liked. but i couldnโt tell her that, not when she had that innocence in her eyes.
i couldnโt tell her i changed because i was scared, how could i turn myself back now, im too far goโ
my thoughts are interrupted by the sound of girls screeching. i turn my head towards the patio door, trying to make out whoโs causing all of this racket.
the patio door slides open and out steps, emma.
i know exactly who follows after.
and there she isโ- y/n, in a white floral top and a blue denim skirt, paired with white converse.
a small plastered on her face, as usual. she tucks a hair behind her ear as she steps out into the heat. i force myself to stop staring before anybody catches me.
the party is finally moving down to the beach, my friends carrying coolers of beers, me carrying one of them, and the rest of the people crowding their way down the street.
iโm trying to pay attention to what my friend nathan is saying but my mind is gone, and so are my eyes.
while he babbles on about how good some girls fuck was, my eyes are glued to y/n. i nod here and there so he doesnโt get suspicious but really, iโm not listening at all.
the way her hair blows in the wind and her laugh. the laugh i knew i fell for as soon as she opened her mouth in 1st grade when i tripped on a walk with our school.
nathan finally finishes his story with an โnever doing that againโ and a laugh. i laugh along with him and reply with a โhell noโ he seemed to play along with that.
my group settles down in a circle, wood in the middle with matt and jake on their hunkers trying to get a spark. when they do everyone cheers and the sound of beer glasses clinking fills my ears.
a while goes by and the sun is setting, everyone drunk, music playing, fire still on somehow. peaceful. โyo chrisโ a voice says to me. i turn my head to see nathan. โwhatโs upโ i ask.
โyou going for a dip?โ he asks, pulling his t-shirt off. โwhoโs going?โ he slides off his sandals. โeveryoneโ i turn my head around to see everyone placing their things near the bonfire to keep them warm, a few already running it the water.
โyeahโ i grab his hand to stand up, pulling off my shirt and shoes, placing my cap down. i run my hands through my hair before running with nathan into the water and diving.
the water is cold but refreshing. the whole crowd of people gathers into the water. one of my friends throws a ball up and all hell breaks loose. an intense game of volleyball without a net starts, nathan and iโs team jumping like animals to try get a hit.
โi got it i got it!โ i yell, moving backwards to try hit the ball. i make a hit and jump back, hitting into someone on accident. i raise my hand up behind me, โmy badโ i say, hearing a laugh, โall good chrisโ
y/n. my heart feels like it just stopped.
i turn around to take a look. wow. sheโs wearing a floral bikini.
โy/n, didnโt think youโd be hereโ i say, running a hand through my wet strands of hair. โyeah, didnโt know partying was this fun until i tried itโ she comments. i nod my head in agreement, โparties are always fun whenever im aroundโ i say with a smirk.
she lets out a breathy laugh, โyeah sureโ she pats me on the shoulder, โkeep telling yourself thatโ i place a hand on my chest, pretending to be hurt. โhow dare youโ i say in a joking tone, erupting another laugh from her.
my team and game of volleyball is long forgotten, all of them too drunk to notice that i left. i had asked y/n if she wanted to go on a walk since she was shivering in the water and she agreed.
the sun has nearly fully set by the time we reach the pier. the glow from the sun casting an orange and yellow hue across the concrete and the water. y/n takes a seat with a little huff leaving her lips, she sits cross cross with her hands in her lap.
i take a seat next to her, my legs stretched out in front and my arms behind me. i look out at the view, the suns glow gently brushing across my face, and y/nโs. it made her eyes glow in a way ive never seen them before.
โitโs beautiful isnโt itโ she comments, โi mean, how can one planet make so much beautyโ she adds on. i nod in agreement taking a look out at the sea. โyeah, it is prettyโ i say.
the sun has finally set and the stars are twinkling. y/n has shuffled to lie down next to me, her hands across her stomach. โthis is niceโ i finally speak up. she hums, โit is even the stars are beautifulโ she says pointing up at them,
โthereโs the north one, thatโs my favourite since itโs the brightestโ i follow her hand up to the sky, lying back beside her too.
โi think my favourite isโ i scan the sky to find it. โthe big dipper, you know because itโs shaped so coolโ she hums again in agreement. we stay in silence for a bit, a comfortable silence.
โdo you want to head back or?โ i ask. she shakes her head, โitโs peaceful hereโ i nod my head. โdo you want to listen to music?โ i add. โyeah sureโ she turns her head to look at me. i take my phone out of my pocket and press play.
โwhite ferrari by frank oceanโ
the songs begins to play at a low volume, i place my phone in between our heads and lie back down. โi love this songโ y/n speaks, โitโs soโ โbeautiful?โ i cut her off. she lets out a laugh, โexactlyโ
my heart beats deep in my chest. anxiety running through my veins. my fingers tap against my stomach as my mind races a hundred miles an hour.
i turn my face to look at her. the way the moon reflects off her face, shadowing her features perfectly. her eyes fixated on the night sky.
โthe moon is beautiful isnโt itโ she says, turning her head to look at me. i nod, my eyes flicking all over her face. the silence between us stretches.
โyouโre beautifulโ i finally speak.
a smile creeps up on her face and even in the dim lighting, i can see the blush sweeping across her cheeks.
i move my hand to tuck a hair behind her ear. she leans her head into my touch. i shift closer to her, resting my body weight on my elbow.
she looks up at me, scanning my face as if sheโs trying to study me. i finally lean in.
my lips brush against hers in synchronised movements. her lips are soft, delicate. i donโt push her anymore, my tongue lightly grazing itself against hers. her hands cup my cheeks as the kiss deepens.
i shift my body to hover above her, keeping myself up with my hands. our lips move slowly but surely against one another. the years of built up tension finally being released.
i unattach myself from her. neither of us speak for a while. a smile still on her face and that look in her eyes.
โy/n iโm sorryโ i whisper. she raises an eyebrow in confusion. โi didnโt mean to change. i was just scared of hurting you so i changed, i donโt even like partyingโ i add on with a scoff at the end looking over at the fire.
her hands trace my cheeks bringing me back to reality. โchris, itโs okay. i know youโ- deep down, i knew you didnโt change for no reasonโ she whispers. i lean into her hand my eyes never leaving hers.
and for the first time in years, i finally felt heard, i felt seen.
and the flame within me had finally ignited. fully.
ahh they finally kissed !!
@owensbabygirl @viviansturns @pepsipoet @sturnstarsblog @suyqa @megluvsmatt @gisouwhat @angel-sturn1 @courta13 @mamaagirlbehindu123 @heartz4lily @bendmeoverchris @chrissturniolodailysluts @chrispycremedonut @sturnl0ve @slutfor-mattsturniolo @sturnsheart @snoopysturnzz @chrissturnioloslefttoe @parkeunsol79 @chrissfavhoe @dawnsturn @breesturn @jesssturnn @perscriptionlove @swiftafboi @sturntiolo @sturnskiss @liiixsturniolos @kropled0oczu
