La Vie En Rose

Twenty-four. Northwest Florida. You must allow yourself to grow in all the places people never thought you would

[chubbybritneyspears]

[benevolentgentleman]

[liberalsarecool]

Be great.

[vegaofthelyre]

[tubofgoodthings]

Calvin’s snowmen are breathtaking achievements and I will accept no disputes

[dinovia-grant]

If he had drawn nothing else but Calvin’s snowmen for ten solid years, I would have been in Heaven.

[xslowly]

[pettycentral]

[stay-close]

I cannot stand small talk, because I feel like there's an elephant standing in the room shitting all over everything and nobody is saying anything. I'm just dying to say, “Hey, do you ever feel like jumping off a bridge?" or "Do you feel an emptiness inside your chest at night that is going to swallow you?" But you can't say that at a cocktail party.

— Paul Gilmartin

[qwertyjoebob]

Babies cry over the weirdest things 🤷

[heydestroya]

[libre07]

[everythingstarstuff]

[the104yearoldvirgin]

Every year the Cullens go to Burning Man

And every year people think they’re doing performance art like Malcolm’s family from that one episode of Malcolm in the Middle. Eventually they get a reputation.

“Oh the Cullens? Yeah. Every year they show up absolutely doused in body glitter and just…go about their normal days like that.”

“The doctor has a first-aid tent and his wife trades homemade soaps and candles out of their van. They always smell so good I can’t say no.”

“The hot blonde one doesn’t even participate, she just lays there and sunbathes. She never burns.”

“The tiny one only hangs out with the really stoned people and braids their hair. I’ve never seen her or any of them sleep.”

“The moody one with the eyebrows, I think his name might be Jessie? Jackass? Whatever. He just lays facedown in the dirt sometimes and doesn’t move for a while. Drugs, man.”

“We don’t know what the big guy’s name is. He only communicates in grunts and nods; but he always wears a tank top that says BEEFCAKE so we just call him that. Sometimes he hands out popsicles.”

“The dark haired girl? The one who wears all the spiky leather? Yeah, she stops by on the first day, but then she disappears again. Pretty sure she’s more into mosh pits than the art scene. She has some chaotic vibes, dude.”

“Edward? The one who just played Wonderwall for 14 hours straight on acoustic guitar last year?”

*edited to include Emmett and Bella after many requests*

[yesterdaysprint]

[niktipolos]

The Daily Times, New Philadelphia, Ohio, July 9, 1924  (via yesterdaysprint)

[tami-taylors-hair]

DIRECT ACTION

[yearningyeehaw]

*cuts you up a bowl of fruit because i love you*

[likewildflowerswegrow]

Did a Whole Foods employee write this?

[isthatatiktok]

[storybookprincess]

suddenly remembered this poem as i was making breakfast this morning & frantically googled “poem remembered to buy eggs?????????” & somehow managed to find it & it utterly knocked the wind out of me just as much as when i first read it

[skidar]

I work in retail and I long for the day I don’t have a blackout card before lunch.

Either wear it properly or stay home. -.-

[moved--306389]

Someone should add “The Bolsonaro” when the mask just goes over your eyes

[sandersstudies]

I have an absolutely horrible addition which is that before the mall closed my husband witnessed a woman walk in wearing a mask with a hole cut in the front because “we’re required to wear masks but it’s easier to breathe this way.”

[codingpinkprincess]

Don’t forget the Kentucky: