There's a hole for that.

Snakes mostly.

[indigosparkle333]

Having an intellectual conversation with someone knowing they’re also dirty asf is such a turn on

[yungpilk]

you people want benjamin franklin

[topherchris]

[orcboxer]

okay what's going on here

[apolladay]

Without searching do you know of a celebrity* that you share a birthday with?

yes

no

Voting ended onMar 15

*Define celebrity however you'd like.

Also Hey Mick Fleetwood birthday twin 👋🏼

[passumbapper]

I do think that "monsterfucking" is one of the funnier terms that people take semi seriously on this website. you people are not fucking no damn monster

[liljumble]

I misread this as "motherfucking" and was like speak for yourself

[jenamaroney]

this video saved my life

[christopher575]

Keep this in your mental file whenever you need a solid laugh. It’ll never, ever lose its power, I promise.

[uncahier]

@larkandkatydid brought back memories of one of the greatest news clips of all time

[great-and-small]

There are a lot of stunning examples of breeding plumage in the world of birds but even among all the flashy colors and fancy patterns I think my favorite has to be the male blue-gray gnatcatcher’s unibrow. When breeding season comes and they need to set themselves apart they literally grow a unibrow.

I must stress the unibrow has no purpose but to help him get laid. If you’re a male BGGC and you want to get laid, you aren’t gonna stand a chance unless you grow yourself a black unibrow and prance around with a fanned tail like this

To a female blue-gray gnatcatcher, there is nothing sexier!

[neenarchive]

they're hiring me at the extra virgin olive oil factory as the oathsworn knight who protects the chastity of the olives

[neenarchive]

many dishonourable knaves in the notes of this post

[starrynet]

what's your favorite sports headline that could also be a whimsical fantasy story plot point if taken out of context?

I'm pissed because we lost to some elves

darius slay says he was "this close" to becoming a raven

transfer portal created in good faith, but is out of control

power of friendship helps spark sharks' historic comeback victory over penguins

jay cutler passed his physical and is officially a dolphin

nightmare eels season

hawks trade young to wizards

vikings discovered new way to stop the eagles' dreaded tush push

p-bruins topped by bears

are newark's mummies to blame for devils' bad injury luck?

seattle kraken hockey player, sea troll charged by grizzly bear

Voting ended onJan 16

(inspired by this classic tumblr post)

[liljumble]

I just sat on my own b*tthole wrong

[blackarachnya]

[fagnfurter]

Goalies are just cats. Gotta fling things around for them to catch and mess with them a bit to keep them entertained. Will swat at you if you get too close in a way they don’t like. May enjoy a weed. Very particular about routine and maintenance. A little crazy

[liljumble]

who up donning they regalia

[strongermonster]

was visiting a friend who has a farm, and one of the chickens has a home made flared cone on, so i asked what was up with that and she said "that's diesel, and she's suicidal" so obviously i went ??? and she pressed the door lock on her truck fob so the truck beeped, and this dumbass bird SPRINTED full tilt across the garden to shove her head in the tailpipe. she has to be locked up and coned so she doesn't gulp down toxic fumes direct from the pipe for some idiot bird reason. she is obsessed with doing this and has to be locked up any time someone is using a vehicle.

[strongermonster]

i told her i posted about this and she has an update (which i guess content warning for animal harm [the animal did it to it's damn fool self])

she found this out the first time when she auto-started her truck to warm it up before work one below-freezing morning and came out ~5 minutes later to find (the then unnamed) diesel with her head stuffed in the tail pipe hanging limply by her idiot neck and thought that she was dead, ran over and pulled her out, and the chicken went "oh hi! anyways mind if i get back in there?" and did it a-fucking-gain??

best guess is bc she feeds her chickens with a pvc gravity pipe like this

and despite having ~40 other chickens who don't fuck this up, diesel went "food comes from tubes, this is tube, ∴ this is the ~secret~ food hole that the others do not know about. i will be rewarded with golden seed for being the cleverest of them all :)" and is now on 24/7 vehicle related suicide watch. fine line between docile and dumb sometimes.

[strongermonster]

my artists rendition of the morning in question

[nina-iseri]

extremely evocative textbook diagram

[boccher]

[charlioak]

they just came out with a new type of guy that freestyles about geological phenomena on reddit

[limnaia]

And, critically, explained what the phenomena is and how it's made in words that a complete dumbass who knows nothing about this can comprehend.

[liljumble]

came back to tumblr after a few days fairly zooted and didn't realize there was a ui update and I thought I was getting dementia

[meangirlnurse]

[whoviankendokaqueenbeewithbooks]

lol