Bury Me Beside You ❧ Lily & Severus
No matter how much meaning people said it had, or how emotional it was meant to be, the witch had never found a purpose in visiting graveyards. When her grandmother had passed away, she hadn’t attended the funeral and never once did she visit her final resting place, never once spoke words of longing into the blowing breeze. She didn’t need it, it gave her no comfort, as she couldn’t bring back the dead and her watching a casket being lowered into the ground wouldn’t make those she loved any more alive. The first funeral she’d ever attended had been Charlus Potter’s. The second, her father’s. And that day, when grey clouds rolled in, she’d visited both their graves, honouring her future father-in-law the same way she honoured her father; they had been good men, men whom she thought to have died too soon.
Regardless of how long they’d been alive, they were still needed. Merlin, what she wouldn’t give to have them both right there, breathing and laughing. She and James were young, they still needed their safety nets, and knowing that they were slowly losing those closest to them made the young woman wonder who’d be next. Tragedy, unfortunately, never came alone.
Still, she’d found herself sitting on the cold ground, shivering gently inside her her warm winter coat and eyeing a grave that read a name she knew too well. With a loud sniffle, Lily pushed a strand of hair out of her face and nibbled on her bottom lip, forcing herself not to cry anymore. Harry Evans wouldn’t have wanted to see her cry, of that she was sure, as she’d been a man who’d loved laughter, especially when it slipped past the lips of her youngest girl. In fact, the only time she’d seen the man cry had been when, after a lot of blushing and nervous giggling, the ginger had told him that she was engaged.
God, he’d been so happy. He’d never been too fond of Vernon, Petunia’s husband, but he’d had a fatherly passion for James; ever since they’d met, the man had treated the raven-haired boy like a son and Lily would forever cherish those memories, the ones that told him he approved of her choices. Out of everything, that had mattered the most. And it was that, as she brought a hand up to her face to muffled a sob, that finally forced tears from Lily’s eyes. She didn’t know if she’d ever shake off the emptiness in her chest, if she’d ever stop crying when, after a long day, she remembered that he was gone. The witch forgot about that often, losing herself in everyday life only to inch her hand towards the phone after dinner, meaning to call her parents as usual, and stopping suddenly, realizing that her father wouldn’t pick it up and ask about her day.
Between sobs and tears, cold winds and lonely graves, Lily didn’t hear the footsteps approaching; noticing them too late and quickly jumping to her feet, hands brushing away the salty water that dripped down her cheeks. She turned to leave, embarrassed to have been found crying on the floor like a walking cliché, and froze on the spot when she saw his face. Brilliant. Wonderful. Bollocks. Why was it that when life was hard, God stopped and went, “My, Lily Evans has it difficult. How about I make it just a little bit worse? She’ll handle it, she’s tough”. It wasn’t fair. Shit, fuck. This was bound to be a pleasant conversation.
"Severus. Fancy seeing you here. Came to visit one of your…" The word ‘victims’ floated in the air, unspoken yet present, tangible. She couldn’t bring herself to speak it, but she knew he’d understand. And for a split second, she felt a strange sense of compassion she couldn’t understand, a want to lean on his shoulder like so many times before. Instead, however, she straightened her back and crossed her arms tightly over her chest, knowing her wand was safely tucked into her pocket and that, if she needed to, she’d take him down and leave. Because while she wanted to reach out and hug him, the witch hadn’t forgotten of their last encounter; how he’d hurt her with his words and shook her with his hands, his eyes filled with something that she couldn’t tell apart, yet knew wasn’t sanity.
That, she feared, had been lost years ago, along with their friendship on a sunny Spring day.
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