going going gone

lisanna harlin (caspar). fortyfive. gallagher alum. weapons/swat training instructor. don't slouch. / @gallagherhqs

[naomipkx]

LOCATION && WITH WHOM : : BALLROOM W / ANYONE @gallagherstart​

“I understand everyone is happy that the school year is over, and so am I! But please be careful with how much you drink!”

[lisannach]

        “oh let them have some fun. they can suffer during the morning after and learn their lessons the hard way.” lisanna notes before smiling at naomi. “don’t tell me that you’re foregoing drinks tonight?”

[lisannach]

grayroman​:

“Jesus, where are my manners?” Roman started, kicking himself before he could allow himself to accept the compliment. “Obviously, you look incredible, Lisanna. Kinda showed half of these kids up, but I think it was worth it,” he winked after giving her another once over, and the suit was really working for her. “And thank you very much,” he added with a smile. “Don’t sell yourself short, though, you’re still her mom. How have things been going with the family, if you don’t mind me asking?”

           “at least you found them before it was too late.” she jokes, before nudging him playfully. “it’s why i show up, you know? show these kids how to really party.” though she wouldn’t mention yet just how bored she’s been, being a housewife yet again. she should’ve joined a gym or a book club like her husband suggested. but with his question, it all comes out like a dam had been broken. a rant worthy of a talk show segment. “i love them. so much. but they are both a mess. my husband keeps talking about promotions despite being a public liability and my daughter is still a bit soft around the edges and she’s going on her fourth year.” she has standards, okay? they’re coming out now. “and me, i’m honestly looking for another job to do. just so i don’t have to stay at the house and make friends with the neighbors who think it’s weird that i’ve come back.”

[lisannach]

bbygrvr​:

‘   aw gross.    ’ he eyes the mud-trail he’s left behind. ‘   you know what ? ain’t my fault. was walking in the forest the other day, just after it had rained. there are no fucking pavements in the forest ! like come the fuck on, it’s 2021, it’s time to start urbanizing nature.    ’ sardonic, a bit clever even but told with so much conviction, he almost tricks himself into actually believing in the self-made cause. bobby doesn’t know the deets with lis and her mom, but he hates his mom for what he’s sure is less, so he’s sympathetic to bad vibes. ‘   do i have to dress up ? actually being choked out by this suit right now. can’t say i’m a fan of autoerotic asphyxiation. but yeah i’ll come. i’ve met people who’ve written me into their wills right after.    ’

           “i’ve met some very aggressive environmental lobbyists that would say the opposite. some have even went as far as to disparage one of my leather jackets.” it was a contract killing so safe to say that the person in question won’t ever do anything ever again, but that’s a fun fact that she’s not willing to divulge all willy-nilly. “please do. it’s in the spirit of all things rich and stuffy. just make sure your collar isn’t choking you. speaking of, do you need help with that right now? i don’t think the kids at the committee will kick you out if your collar isn’t looking right.” she snorted. “if you happen to convince her to do that, keep all of it.”

[lisannach]

ofsoftwords​:

“You look amazing” he said and beamed. “Out of all the outfits I thought you would wear this one surely wasn’t something I even could have imagined” he chuckled. “It’s a good thing though as it’s always a plus to shock people, make people stop and stare” crossing his arms over his chest, River then shrugged. “It’s good seeing you again”

           she stood up straighter, if that was possible, and gave a warm smile. river was always a welcome presence. contrasting her more eccentric parts but never an antagonizing energy. “born to impress. it’s the gallagher girl in me, i guess.” she tilts her head. “it’s good to see you too. what have you been up to?”

[ofsoftwords]

a starter for; @lisannach​

“I thought it was impossible for someone to look like an actual goddess. I guess I was wrong but it wouldn’t be the first time” River said and then smiled as he looked at her. “Sinner or Saint? Come on, Lisanna. You have to tell me or I will walk around and wonder all evening” he chuckled as he crossed his arms over his chest. 

[lisannach]

         she smiles; the same mischievous smile that she’ll have on when she’s trying to pull one on somebody. “now river, we both know which one i truly am. it’s no use trying to repeat it to everyone i see tonight.” in reality, lisanna’s choice of outfit (was thanks to strud) really just bordered on what felt comfortable. and the two-piece ensemble really just felt right. 

[grayroman]

@lisannach​

“There she is,” Roman grins, happy to see an adult he actually knows, and not just talk the ear off of the Research and Development professor who definitely isn’t friends with him and definitely wanted him to stop talking. “Hey, Elisa looks lovely tonight, and I hear her grades are pretty stellar too. You’re doing a great job, you know.”

[lisannach]

            “roman, you look very dashing. handsome. very well put together.” and suddenly, she felt a whole lot better than just walking around like a glorified chaperone over a bunch of kids that she trusts were trained well to not need that much protection. lisanna couldn’t help but smile, a surge of pride coursing through her. “well, thank you. can’t say i can take all of the credit. after all, she’s..she’s not a child anymore. even if it makes me a little teary-eyed to admit.”

[bbygrvr]

                  @lisannach​​

                               he practically stomps up to lisanna, which leaves the dried mud that was formerly lodged in the crevices of his docs, trailing behind him across the ballroom floor. ‘hey.   ’ the firmness in his voice wobbles, because even attempting to settle into anything akin to sternness is impossible. ‘   you promised me a date with your mom.    ’ actually it had been an open invitation that bobby had never followed up on, because there’s seven hundred things going on in his brain at one time, and visiting mama harlin hadn’t won the battle royale — until now. ‘   god she better not be dead.   ’

[lisannach]

            having been the main caretaker of their humble apartment for more than a year now, lisanna’s first attention drifted to the floor and she gestured as such. “bobby, your shoes!” she sighed before waving it off. her daughter was part of the committee, maybe she’ll help clean up if they’re still sober. “she is still alive, as a matter of fact.” and if she mutters unfortunately under her breath, then so be it. she doesn’t have much loving words for her mother nowadays. “how about you just tag along the next time i come? she’s having this grand fête sometime in the summer and i am under obligation to attend.” for the inheritance, if she was being selfish enough.

[shesnake]

Leslie Mann in Blithe Spirit (2020) dir. Edward Hall

[lisannach]

LISANNA HARLIN , UNKNOWN.

hello, it’s she.

[bakulamom]

[isabellaofparma]

You must calm down.

[lisannach]

self - para.

summary: life-long reflection and what happens beyond her stint at gallagher.

notes: i may have cried writing this but im also a mess period. thanks for hanging w this woman for the last few months, its been a blast! also, this is my love letter to the og series, specifically to liz’s valedictorian speech that still makes me cry to this day. 

what is a gallagher girl? seven-year-old lisanna knew of the world of espionage the day her mother, sylvia "swan song" harlin had snapped the neck of someone that had entered the manor and had pulled a gun on her younger sister lisbeth earlier that night. when the harlin children were gathered in the family room, the four of them had their futures planned out right then and there. and while their mother would rather shut down the whines of 'well i wanna be a rockstar!' , 'i hate seeing blood!', 'i'm scared!' , their father welcomed them and assured them they would adjust soon enough. "so, it's like the military?" a then thirteen-year-old wilbur had asked their parents. lisanna saw her mother's lips curl, "not quite." and it was the first time she’s heard the names gallagher and blackthorne. and amidst the escalating pressures of being sylvia’s daughter, she thinks: i’d love to be a gallagher girl. "it's exciting here, isn't it, lis?" lisbeth had asked her, one afternoon during her first year, lisanna during her third and had gotten her own share of stress from her threat elimination and weapons classes. she remembers nodding, a smile from ear to ear. it was the mark of her unusual stride in life; the smile that was always present when she's not knees deep into serious espionage business. "i bet it's even more exciting once we're out there, betty. can you feel it?" and lisbeth laughed, "i'm just a first year, lis! but i know you can't wait to get out there!" after teaching lisbeth how to properly put a kiss on one of gilly's statues, she leads her to the towers and they gossip about life, about the other girls, and about their brothers. one already on the field and one in blackthorne. as a gallagher girl, lisanna savors the moments of normalcy - the homework, the bonds, and the moments she didn't have to fill with her incessant talking. the goal was to graduate with great grades and a job, therefore making her mother proud. to be a gallagher girl was the highest mark of pride and she'd reap every benefit she could and make sure lisbeth does too.

"gallagher girl?" ellison had asked, tone somewhat dripped with judgment. to him, he had known that prissy little academy to be of renown; brilliant girls they said. but ellison would be lying if he didn't think of lisanna then as just one of those girls. spoiled out of their brains with dresses that fit them well, shoes that isn't as sharp to kill, and trust funds as deep as the atlantic ocean. "does that scare you, caspar?" she had asked, one brow raised. behind her saccharine smiles lay a rabble-rouser, one who thrived in chaos and danger and -- well, was it really a surprise that she had adapted to the life as her father had predicted? ellison grinned. back then, he had graduated from university of virginia and was about to go into quantico. to him, lisanna was just another college grad that frequented the royal diner in d.c. a pretty face, sharp wit. surely, it would be a one-night thing? years later and she finds herself out of the field, tending to an infant of her own. while gallagher never did have a childcare curriculum, she figures she could get through it. gallagher girls were made for anything, after all. even babies. her mother a year back had spoken to her, saying that because of one little thing ( at least to lisanna ), that she didn't have a birthright to much of anything. goodbye trust fund, goodbye prestige that came with being a harlin .. but lisanna didn't care. fuck being a harlin, she remembers whispering to herself more than a few times in her life. ellison's hard work plus her own let them afford this nice apartment in d.c. while it was no manor, lisanna knew it was never about how big your house was. it was full of love and energy and with elisa in her arms, what more could she ask for? turns out, when the child has grown up .. she asks for a lot more than what she thought she would. and she almost regrets it. what makes a gallagher girl? elisa was twelve. lisanna was long gone from her role of wife and mother and she was back on the field working mission after mission. she craved the thrill and the danger and the chaos and -- ellison could never say no to her leaving. even if it hurt. because he knew her. he fell for her and he knew why. he expected her departure, but he never expected what would happen next. the way their daughter acted out in an attempt to see if she could lure her mother back somehow. if, maybe, she made enough of a wave, lisanna would reconsider working in the field and come back. but at twelve, elisa wasn't a gallagher girl yet. lisanna would think about it, but it wasn't a life she wanted to push onto them. but years pass, elisa's behavior worsened and ellison was at the end of his rope. so lisanna opens the door into her world, hoping it would be the one to satiate the chaotic energy her own spawn had given off. and it did. elisa was twenty-one, and lisanna was slowly sinking into a specific state of boredom. who knew after twelve years of being in this job, living a life that your own personality could actually take, that you would ..get bored? the thrill wasn't fully gone, no, but it was getting there. so she sends her daughter a message to meet up in d.c. for one day during the summer. at the last minute, she gets called in and, like before, she chooses that world and leaves her daughter hanging. she's forgotten what it was like to be a daughter and to realize that having a matriarchal presence might mean more than she could ever think. because after twelve years, you stop being a gallagher girl and become the very thing they want ( or don't want ) to be. this pleases her mother, who had wanted nothing more but for her children to thrive in the field and excel. killing machines who will help shape society as we know it. she never did ask any of her children if that's what they wanted nor would she have cared. if she did, then she'd know just how much lisanna struggled inside. not just because she doesn't quite know where she stood, but because for all intents and purposes, she should know. she has the skills, the mentality and the endurance. so what's wrong? when lisanna is invited back to gallagher to teach, she almost lunges at the opportunity. it wasn't the shady alleys of moscow or the sweltering heat of monaco as she waited for the target to appear, but that was what she liked about it. a new thrill, a new kind of fun. "fun" to be used loosely, of course. there was nothing fun about the brotherhood and dead bodies and betrayals and a fire. but it occupies her. but she was here for one precious thing: a second chance to see and reunite with her daughter. and while it didn't work out the first time, elisa comes around. and she almost couldn't believe it. what's a gallagher girl made of? there was a distinct difference in how she handles family in every part of her life. even more if she took specific people into consideration. with her parents, she kept them at arm's length and made sure to smile widely for pictures and to shoot straight at targets. with her siblings, she was the shoulder to cry on and tears rolling down their faces as she cracks her tenth joke in that hour alone. with coworkers on the field, she was a no-nonsense weapons master who will kill if the mission said to kill and would deliver frappuccinos at the mission cool-down party. with ellison, she was lisanna harlin. the girl-next-door, triple pepperjack cheese and more tomatoes than what ellison is comfortable with in a tuna sub. the one who supported his every big decision and never complained about the quaint little apartment they called home because it meant much more than a house to her - it was her family. all on her own. and she had so much love to give than she's ever have given before. with elisa, she was blanket forts near the biggest window on starry nights, coming to her defense when sally easton says she pulled her hair when she didn't, and the shadow of a woman she's thought about for the twelve years she was absent. gallagher's curriculum didn't teach her any of that. and while she considered some of the girls and the faculty to be family during her stay then, they surely didn't teach her about separating from your husband and abandoning your daughter. does she still consider herself a gallagher girl? the morning after the end-of-the-year party, she watches the graduates walk across the stage, elisa's sleepy figure next to her, and she beams with a strange kind of pride. gallagher ( and blackthorne ) could claim them for as long as they want. living trophies of the kind of success you could get if you get in and survive all four years. but lisanna knew that it could only take you so far out there. she drives to d.c., elisa in tow, and after they park the car, they pass by the familiar pot of plant that has now long died and the door opens and she sees the love of her life. a scruffy beard and undereyes darkened to years of shouldering the chaos happening everywhere twenty-four seven. and she feels like she's back in that week after graduating gallagher academy and she's getting her usual order at the royal diner and this fresh bastard comes in and thinks he could smooth talk his way into her pants for a night. it's a lie. he stays for a few days and years pass and she's lived a few more lives than she ever thought she'd ever live and she's here. "well, if it isn't my favorite gallagher girls." ellison remarks, opening the door further to let the two in. elisa almost runs to the living room to drop off the bags and use the restroom because her mom did not stop at all during the drive ( but she also wanted to have their moment because it has been twelve years ). wordlessly, lisanna hugs ellison, her head against his chest and she hears their entire life together. and she realizes that while there was absolutely nothing wrong about being a gallagher girl or a spy, she loves being lisanna. and she never had to choose. all this time, she never had to choose. she could just have it. right here. / e p i l o g u e . she hears people talk. lisanna wasn't retired yet, after all. and through ellison's plans to get promoted once again and elisa's strange rants and ravings, she hears people talk. of many things. about a lot of people. and when she hears of jack's ( @jvckstone​ ) death, she exhales and takes a day off from her family to attend the funeral, somewhere in the back. to say that she was grateful for the tiny bit of hope he gave back in their room after elisa had rejected her was an understatement. after the funeral, her mother calls her for the millionth time and she presses ignore for the millionth time. the youth called it self care and if she ever had to face good old "swan song" ever again, she'll be sure to give bobby ( @bbygrvr​ ) a call. he's more than perfect to bring just to converse with her mother as she sips rum from their teacup and smiles every so often when her mother looks over. and after returning home to d.c., she lays back in the chair as her phone rings to her daughter who raves about everything under the sun to her. ellison arrives with two cups of tea, one for each of them. "so, like, is that so cliche? mom, he is so hot, i can't get over it. but would you hate me if i slept with a musician?" elisa asked over the phone. "i would." ellison called over from the love seat and lisanna lets out a laugh. "you know i won't."

and she sees the rest of her life beginning. just like that.

[wnq-anonymous]

I’ve never met a strong person with an easy past.

Unknown (via wnq-anonymous)

[waxxie]

[shouldnt]

Do not fuck with me

[lisannach]

( @naomipkx​ ) “i’m gonna be honest, it has been so long since i’ve played any of these games. they look so fun, too. but .. if i lose to a student, i don’t think i’ll ever return to this country.” she was half-joking, but her pride wasn’t something to be messed with either. but turning to naomi, her expression indicated that she truly wasn’t gonna lose her mind over defeat. “do you play?”

[lisannach]

miraytabak​:

“Thank you!” Miray beamed, grateful that she had agreed to help her and even more so for the compliment. Despite knowing that compliments could easily be thrown around, she liked to believe everyone was being sincere. She handed her phone over to her with the same grin still on her face. “You look lovely as well, by the way. Not everyone can pull off a pantsuit look.” It was certainly a look she never felt she could master. 

she clutches the phone, giving the young girl a grateful smile. “thank you. i won’t waste your time talking about practicality. my daughter would, how you say..roast me for doing so.” she points somewhere in the hallway. “should we find a better lighting or a better background? lead the way.” and while she enjoys the rather sane moment, she remembers the few weapons she had on her person, not visible to the public eye. lisanna wasn’t one for strange surprises, especially not after this semester.

[lisannach]

coraxheartfield​:

“I remember Headmistress Brady to not like events nor parties very much. She believed them to be moments of useless frivolity that didn’t contribute to our education nor our training in the slightest,” Cora remembered with a dry chuckle as she had a sip of her wine. She wondered what the dour woman was up to now. The students now were lucky to have Laura, who was kind enough to throw such lavish affairs for them.  “We all do,” Cora countered back, more than happy to include themselves and their fellow adults in it. Just because they hadn’t had finals to deal with on top of all the chaos didn’t mean that they didn’t get to have moments of gaiety as well. “Is Elisa having fun?”

“that checks out. it’s the kind of leadership that bore us, so .. does that indicate anything or would we have thrived under the kind of leadership laura has?” it was the final night, after all. there wasn’t a lot of things she thought she needed to tiptoe around. while it was no use comparing or criticizing sutton, she felt free - or more free now - to openly say it. for a second, she lets out a small laugh. “right, yes. i keep forgetting, we’re also allowed to suffer. forgive me if i seem..off when it comes to that.” and while she can argue that it was just who she is as a person, lisanna would keep that to herself. she nods, “she seemed like she is. i saw her mingling with some friends and by the roulette. have you played any of the games yet?”