that thing in the corner

I'm all over the place, don't mind me..

[bramstrokerxxx]

Imagine if humans were more like salmon.

[mynewurl]

i feel like if tilda swinton punched me in the face id learn all the secrets of the universe

[cheaphalloweencostume]

cons of tapeworm

-regular parasite stuff. I don’t want to bore you

pros of tapeworm

-friend inside

-never lonely

[bisexualhoe]

I hope no one lowkey hates me. Highkey hate me. Hate me with every fiber of your being. Go big or go home

[notparkr-deactivated20200822]

whats the point of being “horny” if no demon horns physically manifest on my body

[vitamin-death]

[just-shower-thoughts]

I wish that ‘my parents said no’ was still a valid excuse to get out of attending social functions

[twentydun]

will today’s kids ever know how truly iconic Harry Potter Puppet Pals: The Mysterious Ticking Noise was??? Will they ever know how it shaped us as a society?? 

[hamtastrophe]

it’s sometimes hard to believe rasputin was real. like there’s no non-fucked up part of rasputin’s existence

[bigthecat]

did he do something problematic i thought he was just russia’s greatest love machine

[dennys]

ZUCCHIKNEE IS A SERIOUS ISSUE PLEASE SEE A DOCTOR OR A COOK AS SOON AS POSSIBLE

[humdrumhootenanny]

Are your nipples sensitive?

Yeah they don’t take criticism well

[gypsyastronaut]

[bloodfreakpropaganda]

Friend: You can’t watch a whole season in one day

Me:

[lilacfarm]

everytime we touch

did u think about Kiss You or Better Than Words

[lmaoing-deactivated20180925]

can we all just be honest and admit it was neither we all thought of cascada im just being real

[dirtyhippiie]

[grace-adler]

[llbid4life]

Person: you were so quiet when we first met lol

Me: I was analyzing your every move to precisely mold my personality to match with your desires