date someone who makes you feel like concerts do
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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@lolteafunny
date someone who makes you feel like concerts do
There is literally nothing in nature that blooms all year long, so do not expect yourself to do so.
*uses lol and lmfao to make embarrassing and sad truths about myself seem like a joke*
I once tried to explain depression to someone as like if one day you gradually started to lose both your sense of taste and your ability to feel full. And you don’t know why, but now everything you eat tastes like mashed potatoes and nothing you eat is satisfying. You keep eating because you must eat to live, but the effort that it takes to prepare food is taxing and there is no pay off. You just know it will taste like mashed potatoes. You just know you will still be hungry. So you stop bothering with seasonings. Then you stop bothering to use ingredients you used to like. Then you start to wonder what the point of eating is because there is no payoff. You still feel hungry and you’re sick of the taste and you don’t know if you will ever enjoy food again and you don’t know why this is happening.
If someone comes up to you in this scenario and says, “Well have you tried spicing your food? Using different ingredients? Eating foods you used to love?” It isn’t necessarily helpful because the reason you stopped doing all that in the first place is that everything…tasted…like mashed…potatoes.
This. Completely this.
the best part of being in a relationship is sharing food
i like to pretend i’m emotionless but i have at least 200 mood swings a day
People need to realize that there’s a difference between straight people and Straight People™
Straight person: Hey, you got a new haircut. Looks really good.
Straight Person™: No homo, but your haircut looks good on you.
In case you were confused 👌
Just like how there are white people who are gay and then there are the White Gays
White people who are gay: “I’m gay.”
White Gays: “I can’t believe I got accused of racism after calling that person a racial slur! I mean, I know what racism looks like because I’ve been discriminated for my sexuality. How is me being racist even possible? I’M GAY!”
Lmao all the angry White and Straight people in the comments, keep reblogging
neurotypical: i don’t have any mental illnesses or disorders Neurotypical™: Happiness is a choice!! ✨✨Have you tried yoga? Drink more water and eat kale ✨✨
cis person: i identify completely as my assigned gender Cis Person™: It doesn’t matter what you identify as, cause you still have Female Genitals! I’m not being offensive!! Read a book on Human Biology! 🚹🚺
men: I identify as male.
Men™: feminazis ruin everything, get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich bitch
atheists: I don’t believe in god or identify with a religion
Atheists™: Don’t fucking talk to me if you believe in God. Open your closed-fucking-minds!! (usually targeted towards Christians)
nice guys: hey I know when not to invade someone’s space and I totally respect boundaries
Nice Guys™: IVE BEEN YOUR FRIEND FOR A MONTH AND NOW YOURE TELLING ME YOU DONT WANT TO FUCK ME ???? WHAT IS THE POINT OF WOMEN IF YOURE NOT HAVING SEX WITH ME?
this post got all kinds of better since I last saw it
This post is perfection across the board.
feminist: I believe in equality for everything between the sexes
Feminist™: ALL MEN ARE ASSHOLES AND SHOULD DIE! WE DONT NEED ANY OF THEM ANYWAYS AND THEY NEVER DO ANYTHING GOOD FOR US!!
Christian: I believe in God and his son Jesus
Christian™: We must Obey Bible In Everything and Take It Literally and if you don’t do it you’re Going To Hell! I’m praying for you to find God and have your sins Forgiven! Other religions are from Satan and So Is Atheism!
me in calculus class: what in integration
I love crossing the street while cars are turning cuz it’s like wow either you hit me and I die, you hit me and I sue you, or you don’t hit me and I get to cross the street either way I win.
teach your sons emotional intelligence
im on the floor
*uses lol lmao and rip as punctuation*
A Parks and Rec revival called Parks and Rebellion in which Leslie Knope wages war against the Trump administration via all the national park Twitter accounts.
BLESS THESE REPRESENTATIVES
oh ya’ll thought that was it? nah, there’s plenty more where that came from.