Everything I never said.

[hatin]

there is so much hurt and sadness inside of me and i have no idea how to control it anymore

[stay-close]

The one thing I don't want to be is a burden to anyone.

— Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood

[touchmykat-deactivated20210717]

I just want someone to be sure about me. 

[neckkiss]

[geoffmcfetridge]

[daisyprayers]

Experiencing burnout in an area you love doesn’t mean you are no longer passionate about that thing, or are any less good at it. It’s often an indication that there are other parts of your life that need your care. A garden looks most beautiful when every flower is watered, and you deserve to nourish yourself in the same way. You will flourish again.

[nd-af]

Mourning you while I’m right next to you

[orangerainbow]

and finally that day has come: the day when my thoughts are no longer filled with you; the day when the idea of ​​"forever with you" became just "it was happy as long as it lasted" and everything is fine; thinking that you can or will meet someone doesn't hurt; that living without you is possible; and that I can finally be me again. this is the day that i finally moved on. you and I were the most magical thing that we lived. like we used to say that 'we had met each other in this life again'. our memories of the time we were together are precious and most of them are pretty. today I can finally see through everything that happened and I'm thankful for you. thanks for your existence that made me want to trust someone again. thank you for made me fall in love when I thought it couldn't happen again. thank you for being my best friend. thank you for being my first. thank you for had loved me. it doesn't matter what happened after everything and why we break up. I forgive you and I'm not going to take the bad memories with me. I hope you do the same. like I said a hundred of times, what we had was something brilliant, pure and magical but all this thing are in the past now like a good memory. thank you for have gone through my life and for all your efforts. I'll always love you as well and I hope you find a incredible person. my heart is in peace. finally!!!

//my last letter for you. 🧡

[asecretvoice]

Are you happy now, knowing how much you broke me? Using me only when you wanted to, throwing me to the side when you found something new and shiny. How dare you ask me to be your friend, as if I would be okay watching you find your happiness in someone else from the sidelines. Was I nothing but a backup plan when she didn’t turn out like you hoped? Knowing I would always be there for you to use and use again, but never good enough to stay. Why treat me as something permanent when you only wanted me temporarily? Are you okay knowing how much you hurt me, does it leave you waking up gasping for breathe, a heavy dull emptiness in your heart knowing the person who you loved so much never loved you back? That it never existed in the first place.

-I really hope you are happy now

[you-do-not-deserveme]

I hope one day you realize that I didn’t just walk away. That I didn’t give up on us. I got tired. Tired of trying to be enough. Tired of bringing up the past hoping it would be the last time. Tired of wiping the tears off my face. Tired of begging for you to show up for me the way I needed you to. I didn’t give up. I didn’t walk away. I made a decision that hurt me more than you’ll ever know. A decision you forced me to make by questioning my worth.

[sa-dnesss]

“I was 12 thinking about killing myself. I am 21, still thinking about killing myself.”

—

[wishing-for-deathx]

“I am tired of being told I am loved and cared about but never made to feel that way.”

— your actions and words never match

[whendidmythoughtsgocrazy]

“Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street.”

— k.b. // olivia rodrigo - drivers license

[macrolit]

“I feel I’m moving toward as well as away from something, and anything is possible.”

— American Psycho, Bret Easton Ellis

[schuylerpeck]

“Allow the change, the move to the west coast. Allow the new romance, allow the new stains, the old sheets. The new nicknames, the old TV. The softer hands, sweeter mouth, smoother temper. Live slow, in every room of the house. Dance in the hall, fuck on the couch, sleep in the bathtub, pray in the kitchen, laugh on the bed. Repeat the word gentle in the mirror. There will be new keys, new aches, old worries. The life that changes when you look away. Skylines and seasons and shampoo bottles. Same you. Somehow better. Somehow just as wonderful.”

— Schuyler Peck, New Stains

[vicforprez]

[4am-reflections]

i know i hurt you. but my god you hurt me too.

4am