Thoughts From Dragon

Farming, writing, thinking, attempting to avoid the depressing cloud that is my mental/physical disabilities ruining my existence. Don’t be surprised if I suddenly disappear for awhile, or forever. It’s not like anyone sees me anyway.

[lonelylittledragon]

Oops, I stayed up once again until three thirty in the morning writing. I hope I don’t regret this tomorrow.

[lonelylittledragon]

Here I am. Hiding with my goats. The country I live in getting scarier and more messed up by the second. My life and the lives of so many people getting more and more difficult and deadly. How can we keep doing this?

My anxiety got so bad recently that I don’t think I would be able to get a job. But I can’t survive without money. The car mainly used by my family was just repossessed. The entire situation is so screwed up and it hurts feeling so alone.

I don’t know what to do.

[lonelylittledragon]

In my waking life I have never been afraid of zombies. My family never watched scary zombie movies and I’m pretty sure the only zombie exposure I really had was the plants vs zombies game. So why are a good portion of my nightmares focused on zombies?

[lonelylittledragon]

List of the various topics my family has discussed this Christmas Eve.

-expiration dates

-hiccups

-road rash

-carrots

-the munsters/Addams Family

-puppuccinos

-You Can’t Take It with You

-tape

[lonelylittledragon]

Christmas days topics so far:

-jellyfish and man o’ wars

-loons

[lonelylittledragon]

List of the various topics my family has discussed this Christmas Eve.

-expiration dates

-hiccups

-road rash

-carrots

-the munsters/Addams Family

-puppuccinos

-You Can’t Take It with You

-tape

[lonelylittledragon]

On a four hour car ride home through mountain passes with a puppy in the car. Stressful.

[lonelylittledragon]

Thngs just can’t seem to go to plan. Ever.

[lonelylittledragon]

Who would have thought that an extended family zoom call would be just as stressful as meeting in person.

[lonelylittledragon]

What happens when you try and photograph goats.

[best-of-memes]

[lonelylittledragon]

Both

[lonelylittledragon]

For some reason I have the urge to completely reorganize my room right now but it’s 4 in the morning so I think I’ll go to bed instead.

[lonelylittledragon]

I wish I never tried to go back to school.

[lonelylittledragon]

[lonelylittledragon]

I hate submitting school assignments. It always leads to an anxiety filled couple hour wait until it gets graded.

[lonelylittledragon]

What on earth am I doing? Why am I trying to go back to school? I should really know by now that school and I don’t mix.

[lonelylittledragon]

Happy New Year!

[lonelylittledragon]

This has not been a good week. Our beloved dog got in a fight and died from her injuries, dad’s having trouble with his eye and ended up hitting a deer on his way home resulting in his car needing to be towed, and on top of all that the cats are in heat. We want to get them fixed but the guy helping us buy a house doesn’t want us spending any money until we have the house two months from now. Which means three little black cats keep trying to find a way out of the house to find a boy.

Some of my siblings don’t even know that we lost the dog because it only happened last night, mom is at a business meeting and won’t be back for hours, and I can’t bring myself to say anything. None of this has been good for my mental health that had already hit an all time low recently.

I know no one is probably going to see this but if you do then I hope you are doing well. I’m trying to be hopeful and plan for the future but it’s not going well. So far my blog has mostly been about the hard things in my life and I hope to change that in the new year.

Wishing you all a happy and safe holiday season. Thanks for reading.