Alone In My Head

I don't expect anyone to understand.

[lostinthemist]

My teen experienced his first food pantry today. Nothing new to me, but I hadn't wanted to have to resort to it for him. I'm so thankful for these programs to help out. But am feeling down today. Still so far away from having rent. I'm afraid he will have to go back to my Mom's. He is trans and does not get the support he needs there. He is mis gendered, dead named and ridiculed. I was raised in the narcissistic household and feel sick at the thought of him going back more than the thought of me being homeless again. I beg, any help is beyond appreciated. Photos of his first pride because I'm a proud Mama.

Single mom struggling with rent and bills, organized by Shannon Smith

Hi, my name is Shannon. I work full time and am Mom to a wonderful 15 year ol… Shannon Smith needs your support for Single mom struggling w

[lostinthemist]

Single mom struggling with rent and bills, organized by Shannon Smith

Hi, my name is Shannon. I work full time and am Mom to a wonderful 15 year ol… Shannon Smith needs your support for Single mom struggling w

I beat homelessness two years ago. I work full time. I don't drink, smoke, go out. I literally work and go home unless my kiddo and I are hitting up parks, museums, zoos etc. Finances have been a struggle. We had a storm hit last weekend that had us without power for three days and ruined all of our food. As well as 90,000 of our neighbors. I'm just trying to keep from regressing to where I was a couple years ago.

[lostinthemist]

After 11 months in my car. Waking up to strangers masturbating and leaning in my car, getting my phone stolen, going hungry, aching, lacking basic hygiene comforts, lonely, hot or cold, propositions.... I have a home. A career. The day after I moved in the engine locked up on my old car. It's like she knew I made it and she could rest. I'm slowly putting my apartment together a bit each payday. It still feels unreal. The news even did a story on me! A month ago I was sleeping in the park. Now I'm planning for formal galas I have to attend at my job. It's crazy.

Update: Someone suggested I post my amazon wishlist so they could get me a housewarming gift. Here it is! Thanks for taking a look!

Check out my list on Amazon

[lostinthemist]

If tears had value, I'd be rich.

[lostinthemist]

I'm on the waiting list for housing. I'm waiting on a background check for a receptionist position. Being homeless, I was unable to get the lett er from the foodstamps office saying I needed to recertify. So I have been waiting a week now since finding out I had no benefits to hear from them. I'm so hungry. I had a McChicken yesterday afternoon. I have a headache, no gas, money or food and I just feel so defeated. I have taken all the steps and now all I can do is beg or wait. I don't feel right begging strangers. They work for their money and I am not entitled to it. Last night the weather dipped to 47°F. I covered myself up with random bits of clothing. I'm trying so hard to stay positive. I'm struggling. If anyone can spare $7 ($5 for gas and $2 to eat) I'd be beyond grateful.

Cashapp: $SoulSurvivor83

PayPal: [email protected]

[lostinthemist]

It's so hot that I have trouble breathing. We are under heat advisory. I feel sick. No energy. Short post today.

$SoulSurvivor83

[lostinthemist]

Things aren't getting better. More and more I grow tired. Tired if fighting, tired of painting a smile on and mostly tired if waking up each day. Doctors told me my ankle is too injured to repair. They said it will only worsen trying to work on my feet. The weather is unbearable. I stay with a heat rash on my face. My car is falling apart. The tags expire in two months and it won't pass Marta to get new tags. I'm so close to being ready to find a quarry to do a one woman Thelma & Louise. I can't handle the pain in my chest as soon as I open my eyes, they breaking down in tears in front of strangers, the dread of living another day.

Cashapp: $SoulSurvivor83

PayPal: @Shannon62983

[lostinthemist]

Gotta. Love being homeless with no air conditioner. I'm too drained to move, too hot to sleep, eat. I reek. I'm hoping to find a shower before work on Tuesday. I'll be three days ripe by then.

Cashapp: $SoulSurvivor83

PayPal: [email protected] (@Shannon62983)

[lostinthemist]

Holidays, when you are homeless, are quite depressing. It's hot, I'm so very hungry, all I smell around me are grills full of good smells. I want to be like a dog, grab a sausage and run. It is July 4th. All week I have been hearing fireworks and gunshots as I "sleep" in my car. My cycle started today so now instead of just hot and hungry, let's add more hunger, back pain, headache, cramps and depression. Yay!

Cashapp: $SoulSurvivor83

PayPal: @Shannon62983

[lostinthemist]

A random stranger gave me $20 for my birthday. I was thankful. It gave me some gas and a bite to eat. No cake, no card, no candle to make a wish. I have an interview Friday at a fast food restaurant. I'm worried about having clean clothes to wear to the interview. And showering before. Wish me luck.

Cashapp: $SoulSurvivor83

PayPal: @Shannon62983

[lostinthemist]

Just now noon and just as sucky if a birthday as I imagined.

[lostinthemist]

It's officially my birthday. I ate a $1 chicken sandwich yesterday. I have no gas. My battery pack is dead, so no fan. I have 30¢. I'm sleeping in the parking lot of a funeral home. It seems fitting enough. Happy birthday to me.

Cashapp: $SoulSurvivor83

PayPal: @shannon62983

[lostinthemist]

I ate a banquet pot pie yesterday. It's 1 p.m. and I am so hungry my stomach hurts. Depression is on a high. My birthday being tomorrow only adds to it. My car stinks from sweat and filth. I managed to shower at the community pool today and it makes me notice the stench even more. I hate what my life has become.

Cashapp: $SoulSurvivor83

PayPal: @Shannon62983

[lostinthemist]

For my birthday, everyone should sign up. Then we both get $10 😁🍰🎉

Hey, join me on Oxygen to open a bank account. We would each get $10.0 when you just sign up and an additional $50.0 when you move your direct deposit over.

https://oxygenbank.onelink.me/vjPj/e85a4728

Trying to get gas ⛽. I'm below E. I came across some free rubber duckies and am going to paint them. My first one is The Dark Knight version of Joker. It's something to do to take my mind off of everything. I applied to Burger king today. They had one person working. I'm hopeful. My birthday is 48 hours away and so depressing.

Cashapp: $SoulSurvivor83

PayPal: @shannon62983

[lostinthemist]

My feet are so puffy I can't get my sandals on. Somewhere between 2+-3+ edema. I have an inflamed pilonidal cyst, a broken tooth, $4 and 1/8th of a tank of gas. My birthday is in 4 days. The closer it gets, the more depressed I become. 38 and nothing to show. Happy birthday to me. Another miserable day in my car. Ugh in sorry for the pity party. It was too humid to sleep last night and the antibiotics for the cyst have my stomach hurting. It's supposed to be taken with food. I'm saving my last $5 in foodstamps for a cupcake Tuesday.

Taking Birthday donations. (6/29/1983)

Cashapp: $SoulSurvivor83

PayPal: @shannon62983

[lostinthemist]

My birthday is in 5 days and 30 minutes. I already know it will be another regular day for me. Wake in my car, sit here miserable and hope that I can get a room just to sleep in a bed. I have to text the woman at the shelter again tomorrow. We keep missing each other or having to reschedule. I was able to get antibiotics from the free clinic for my tailbone. So that was great. They would have been $10 or more had I had to pay. I need to save up some money to go to goodwill for more summer clothes. Long sleeves and heavy denim are not great in the hot and humid weather.

Cashapp: $SoulSurvivor83

PayPal: @Shannon62983

[lostinthemist]

Guys, it's legit. No ID required, no bank needed. It helped me get food, pay my storage, get gas. It's super easy, no ID. Within an hour or so you get a notification saying you have $10. I went ahead and posted it. I made $70 today. And I confirmed that folks did get their $10.

Hey, join me on Oxygen to open a bank account. We would each get $10.0 when you just sign up and an additional $50.0 when you move your direct deposit over.

https://oxygenbank.onelink.me/vjPj/ab1c1c43