Louise Lyttleton

A Multiple Muse Blog.

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kdstp:

It was fairly obvious that Ryan was annoyed with what was happening and the sudden insecurity Louise was showing. He really didn’t care that anyone could walk in right now, because the chances were high that they wouldn’t. He wasn’t saying it, though, because he knew that wasn’t really the point of why she was doing this. The proof of that came when she moved up and pressed her lips against his; she wanted him to do more. She wanted to feel as well.

He didn’t immediately kiss back as he hadn’t quite expected it, but when she persisted she gave in. One hand moved around her waist and he pulled her against himself, almost forced her to stand on her toes. He moved up her shirt as he did this, feeling the skin of her lower back against his arm.

It didn’t last long before he forced her mouth open with his tongue. He didn’t care to think about the possibility of tasting himself, because none of that mattered. He took a few steps forward, driving her back up against the wall. He knew exactly what she was initiating, and she was going to get it.

When he responded to her, she felt herself begin to warm up. Her hand was still around him, slowly stroking. She kissed him back passionately, letting out a soft gasp when he wrapped his arm around her.

It was only when he began pressing her towards the wall that she had to let go of him and grab hold of his shoulder to keep her balance. When her back hit the wall, she flinched a little, but immediately began to pull his shirt up with one hand and push his pants further down with her other.

Her breathing had sped up. This was incredibly exciting and she couldn’t help feeling desperately needy to get more from him, feel more of him.

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When his eyes were closed, he tried to envision what he had just done. He could still hear the crying, the complete hysteria of just having lost the person you love the most. He could then hear the gun shot, loud and clear in his mind. It’d gone so fast that he’d missed the exact moment of her death, but the silence that come afterwards was proof enough. Then there’d been the blood, staining the floor. He’d wanted to step into it, almost, leaving bloody footprints everywhere he went. 

Holy shit. 

Louise was trying her hardest to give him exactly what he wanted, and the noises only made him think that she was very close to succeeding. Of course, he’d way better than this, but these techniques weren’t what made it so good. He felt so powerful right now. Everything had gone exactly as he had wanted, and now he had an experienced girl at his feet, giving him what he wanted without even having to ask for it. 

When she pulled back, however, he looked down immediately. What was happening? She wasn’t supposed to stop! “Wha–” Louise’s question interrupted him, but then he just sighed. Having somebody walk in on them really was the very least of his concern. “Then they see this. So what? Just go on.”

Did she want that? Did she want to be seen on her knees in front of a guy she’d never actually spoken to? She was pretty sure it would do something to her reputation here. She didn’t want people to think she was easy, or that she was a slut. That’s not why she was doing this. She was doing this to revel in this man’s power. He’d just murdered and it had turned him on. She loved that.

She twisted her hand around him, but instead of moving forward and continuing like he’d asked her to, she moved up. She kept her hand around him, slowly moving over him, while her other hand moved to the back of his neck. She pressed closer, pressing her lips against his. She was gentle at first, but soon began kissing him more forcefully. If he wanted to come, then he should fuck her. If he wanted to show her his power, then he should take her however roughly he wanted to. She wasn’t going to have it any other way.

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kdstp:

He closed his eyes for a few seconds when he was touched, very relieved to finally have this happen to him after so long. The way in which it was happening was incredibly hot as well, so there was not going to be a reason for him to complain about being here anytime soon. If he managed to get this all right, there would not even be a reason for Louise to complain about being here anymore either. No need to cry when your mouth was filled by a guy who had just murdered two people. Jesus Christ. 

He couldn’t help but moan when she took his length into her mouth. She hadn’t done this before and he could feel that as she was being careful, but that only made him smirk more. He’d taken more than just two lives today, and he wasn’t going to be done with it anytime soon. 

He pushed her head forward quite roughly, but she’d be able to pull back if she really needed to. He was going to make her get used to this, but he wasn’t going to be sweet about it. There wasn’t anything wrong with having to gag in the process of learning. 

Something told him that being gentle wouldn’t exactly be what she wanted either, considering the fact that he had just killed was getting her as turned on as she was. 

Her hand tightened around Ryan’s hip when he forced her head forwards roughly and she couldn’t help letting out a soft noise. She pulled back a little, but not as far as she could. She wanted to impress him. She actually wanted him to use her, but she was rather grateful he was at least being careful.

She breathed in through her nose deeply and moved further forwards, taking more of him into her mouth, moving her tongue against him gently. This was difficult, harder than she expected, but she liked it, especially when he moaned. She was incredibly turned on, the whole idea of what was happening being so incredibly thrilling and hot that her hands were almost trembling.

She pulled back then, because a realisation suddenly struck her. “What if someone comes in?”

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louiselyttleton:

Her stomach was twisting and turning and her heart racing uncontrollably. She hadn’t expected to end up doing this, at any point, with anyone at all, in here. She dreamed, almost nightly, of the Master coming to her and being as rough with her as he wanted, taking everything he wanted from her. She wondered whether that would ever happen… not that she’d ever give up.

She moved down when he pushed her and a wave of nerves crashed through her suddenly. She’d never been shy around sex, but that didn’t mean that having it didn’t make her a little nervous. Didn’t it do that to anyone? Nervousness and excitement were so close together after all.

The hand at the back of her head, ready to guide her, turned her on. She wanted to please him, she wanted him to do with her what he wanted.

She lifted her hands and began to undo his pants until she could push them all the way down, after which she reached up for his underwear. She tugged it down and watched as he sprung free. “Tell me what you want.”

It had been so incredibly long until he had experienced anything remotely like this. It had never happened before, because perhaps he had never been interesting– or interested enough. He’d been so focused on achieving what he had achieved today that nothing apart from that mattered anymore. It mattered today, though, and it had come to him so easily and naturally that he barely even had to think about it. He’d not necessarily looked for sex, but he was getting it. That was an even better gift for just having killed someone. 

“I want you to do what you think is right, and I’ll take it from there. Use your tongue.” He smirked down at her and grabbed for her wrist, bringing it to his length and urging her to take it in her hands. “Don’t be shy now. You want this.”

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She did want this.

Louise wrapped her hand around Ryan’s length and leaned in closer. She’d jerked a guy off before, once when she had a friend over who was a guy and that boy at the party. So at least she knew a bit about that, but that wasn’t the issue--not that their really was one. She didn’t care not knowing how to do this and it seemed that he only got off on it.

Her lips touched the head of his cock and her stomach twisted with both nerves and excitement, before she parted her lips and slowly took him into her mouth. She used her tongue, quite like he’d asked her to, licking over the head of his shaft while she tried to take him into her mouth further. The only thing she was afraid of was making a fool out of herself and that he’d think she was stupid.

She took hold of his hip with her other hand and shifted a little closer. She couldn’t believe she was doing this.

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louiselyttleton:

She couldn’t help feeling excited when his hand rested on her throat. She wanted to know what more he could do to her. She wanted to see it, feel it. He wanted to feel powerful? With her body at his mercy, he could. He was. When her hand was shoved down into his pants she gasped a little and her stomach turned when she felt him. He was clearly very, very aroused by all of this. She let him hold her chin and she didn’t take her eyes off him because of it. She gently pressed against him through his underwear, but then began to grin. “Do you want me to suck you off?” she grinned even wider then. “I’ve never done it before. Do you like that?“

Louise had been attractive to him from the start. Physically, that was. She was certainly special, especially when the stories about her had come in. She was different from the rest– or most– of them. She had come here because she wanted to, probably because she wanted to do something meaningful, something that was going to make a difference. Whether that was a good difference or a bad one was irrelevant, but she was going to make one now. 

He moved both of his hands to her shoulders and pushed her down, forcing her onto her knees. “You’ve certainly thought about doing it, haven’t you?” He grinned, but he looked quite dark. He thought of what he’d done to the boy’s mother as she had screamed and cried, holding her dead son in her arms. That had been hot too. “I do like that. I’ll teach you well.”

His hand moved to the back of her head, but he kept her still. “Take my pants down.”

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Her stomach was twisting and turning and her heart racing uncontrollably. She hadn’t expected to end up doing this, at any point, with anyone at all, in here. She dreamed, almost nightly, of the Master coming to her and being as rough with her as he wanted, taking everything he wanted from her. She wondered whether that would ever happen... not that she’d ever give up.

She moved down when he pushed her and a wave of nerves crashed through her suddenly. She’d never been shy around sex, but that didn’t mean that having it didn’t make her a little nervous. Didn’t it do that to anyone? Nervousness and excitement were so close together after all.

The hand at the back of her head, ready to guide her, turned her on. She wanted to please him, she wanted him to do with her what he wanted.

She lifted her hands and began to undo his pants until she could push them all the way down, after which she reached up for his underwear. She tugged it down and watched as he sprung free. “Tell me what you want.”

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louiselyttleton:

She’d only done this once before, have sex with a guy, that is. It had happened a few months ago at a party a boy in her college threw. He was taking photography, like her, but a year higher, and they’d met a few times. He was handsome and she’d figured he’d be a good first time… but he’d never quite shown attraction to her. She’d gotten him drunk, at his own party, and it had all gone rather easily from there. They’d kissed, gone up to his bedroom, then they made out more and then when she took off her shirt and let him touch her boobs, he was all over her. She was glad it wasn’t her first time–which was with a girl–as otherwise it would’ve been a very messy one.

“How did it feel to do that?” she asked, stepping closer to Ryan. She was aroused and her heart was pounding in her chest. “Did you feel powerful?” Her hands moved to his hips and she ran her fingertips over his belt, before slowly pulling her fingers down over the denim on each side of his crotch teasingly, not yet touching him. “What do you want me to do?” she asked, still looking up at him. She’d started to grin too.

Louise had seemed to be all over her now that he had mentioned this. Perhaps she understood this even better than he had thought at first, when he had hoped she would understand his arousal. Now she was trying to open a very sexual conversation about this, which pleased him to insanity. This really was a very special day. He could imagine he’d be jerking off to the thoughts later, but this was much better. Louise seemed to be getting off on this as well. Perhaps that’s why she’d voluntarily come here. 

He nodded at the question, feeling himself getting a bit more aroused now that she was touching him. “It’s unlike anything else. You don’t even have to think about whether you do it or not. It’s not even a question. They died because of me.” He raised his hand and moved it over her throat at first, just to see how she would respond to that. Then he took the opportunity to lift up her chin so she’d have to look up at him. “And I love it. Everything about it.”

His other hand moved to the one that was teasing his stomach and he shoved it further into his pants. She’d be able to feel him now and that in itself already felt amazing. He was already sensitive, but this was too hot to even begin to describe. “Let’s start there.”

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She couldn't help feeling excited when his hand rested on her throat. She wanted to know what more he could do to her. She wanted to see it, feel it. He wanted to feel powerful? With her body at his mercy, he could. He was. When her hand was shoved down into his pants she gasped a little and her stomach turned when she felt him. He was clearly very, very aroused by all of this. She let him hold her chin and she didn't take her eyes off him because of it. She gently pressed against him through his underwear, but then began to grin. "Do you want me to suck you off?" she grinned even wider then. "I've never done it before. Do you like that?“

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kdstp:

The second he mentioned what he’d done, something seemed to change in Louise. Suddenly it was like she didn’t care that he had basically just pressed his arousal into her stomach while she was crying. No, suddenly she was nothing but interested. He couldn’t help but let a smirk creep onto his lips. He wanted recognition. He wanted admiration. And he was getting that now, when he didn’t think anyone else ever did.

“It was.. incredible.” He said, shaking his head a little bit as he thought of it again. “There were two of them. A son and his mother. She screamed a lot.” He took a step closer too, meeting her halfway. “You can feel what that did to me if you’d like.” he added, nodding towards his crotch.

She’d only done this once before, have sex with a guy, that is. It had happened a few months ago at a party a boy in her college threw. He was taking photography, like her, but a year higher, and they’d met a few times. He was handsome and she’d figured he’d be a good first time... but he’d never quite shown attraction to her. She’d gotten him drunk, at his own party, and it had all gone rather easily from there. They’d kissed, gone up to his bedroom, then they made out more and then when she took off her shirt and let him touch her boobs, he was all over her. She was glad it wasn’t her first time--which was with a girl--as otherwise it would’ve been a very messy one.

“How did it feel to do that?” she asked, stepping closer to Ryan. She was aroused and her heart was pounding in her chest. “Did you feel powerful?” Her hands moved to his hips and she ran her fingertips over his belt, before slowly pulling her fingers down over the denim on each side of his crotch teasingly, not yet touching him. “What do you want me to do?” she asked, still looking up at him. She’d started to grin too.

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kdstp:

The situation had very clearly changed, and that made Ryan feel a little bit more at ease. Louise was aware of what Ryan was doing now and so Ryan didn’t have to act like something else was going on. He knew that it was rather wrong what he had come in for, but he couldn’t help it. Now he simply had to stand behind that decision. He needed to not feel bad about it, and then it would possibly all work out. Louise didn’t seem all too offended, especially now she was getting closer. 

He laughed a little when she asked. his heart was beating in his chest because he was remembering, and the fact that he definitely wasn’t supposed to talk about this definitely didn’t slow it down. He felt excited again, and his arousal was growing. Shit. “I just killed someone.” He said. It wasn’t a confession, just a statement. He had. Now someone had heard. Now somebody was going to think something about it and he couldn’t wait to hear what it was. “I wanted to comfort you at first, and help.” He started. “And then I wanted to distract you, if you’d be up for distraction.” 

Killed someone? Her heart raced in an instant and she felt her cheeks flush warm. Her eyes were on him and she practically saw him transform from an attractive, adequately sexy person to... well, a killer. But in her book that was a good thing. It was still strange to think that she'd done it too, killed someone. It hadn't felt sexy, but that didn't mean that other people killing wasn't. He seemed to get off on it. Her posture changed. She stood taller, exposing more of herself. "What was that like?" she asked with an unavoidable tremble in her voice. This was just too exciting, too... arousing. She felt herself getting wet and she suddenly wanted nothing more than for him to fuck her and tell her everything about what he'd just done.

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kdstp:

The fact that he had intruded Louise’s personal space definitely calmed her down, because she was no longer crying. It made him glad that he had at least managed to do that, because this entire situation didn’t look all too good for him. Maybe he could make Louise believe him. Maybe she’d like the distraction. He could only hope so. “Alright.” He sighed softly, looking away for a little moment, but then he looked Louise in the eyes again. “I just came back from a job– or well.. Well, it was my first one, actually.” He was being careful with what he was saying, because he really shouldn’t be saying any of this. “It was very, very exciting, alright?”

He shook his head, this wasn’t the whole truth. “I heard you crying, and… Don’t get me wrong, I really wanted to make you feel a little better, but it also reminded me of what had happened and I just got… aroused.” He admitted, hoping that the honesty would help his case. He really did look as apologetic as he could manage. 

Louise leaned back against the table that stood behind her while she listened. Her eyebrows raised a little when he mentioned a job and how exciting it had been. She wanted to know what he’d done, but she was well aware that she couldn't ask. Then again, he was telling her things he wasn't supposed to talk about either. She didn't care for his apologetic look, because she actually didn't care about why he got aroused in the first place. What she wanted to know was what he was going to do now. "What did you do?" she asked daringly, knowing this wasn't allowed. She stepped a little closer again. "Tell me. And tell me what you want."

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kdstp:

Louise wasn’t going to stay near him now that she had noticed what was happening to Ryan. He was aroused, yes, and it was only partially because of Louise’s tears. It didn’t even have that much to do with what was happening to her or why she was crying, but it was the memory of what he’d just done that had left him hungry for something else, some recognition for what had happened. He wasn’t going to get that elsewhere. 

“Sorry.” He tried, without further explaining himself, but he realised that he was going to have to say something to make up for it. The words were practically on his tongue already, but he wasn’t so sure whether he could give them away. Would anything happen to him? Was he going to risk it? Possibly. He really wanted some recognition. “I can explain this, and it’ll make so much sense, but…” He looked a little bit nervous, but simultaneously unashamed. He laughed nervously, trying to distract her from what she’d just noticed. “You have to promise me you won’t tell anyone I told you this, alright?” 

She didn't know what he could be talking about, but she was curious now and the distraction was definitely welcome. It was her curiosity and likely her boredom that kept her from stepping away. What else was she supposed to do? Walk out because this was weird and go back to being bored and sad and frustrated? "Go ahead," she then said, glad that her voice was stable again. She dried her eyes. "I promise."

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kdstp:

Ryan couldn’t help but smirk a little when Louise responded so his touch so positively. It seemed like she had been craving it a little herself too, because now her face was buried into his chest and he could feel the warm tears hitting his chest through his shirt. She was gripping it too, sobbing against him like it didn’t matter. It didn’t really, because it wasn’t unusual for Ryan to do something like this. He was always quite affectionate. 

Something that was different was that he was so obviously turned on because of this. The tears simply felt too familiar and he could feel that his heart was beating so much faster than it was before. Louise must be able to both feel and hear that now, although Ryan wasn’t quite sure whether it would disturb her crying. 

He placed one of his hands on the small of her back and he rubbed her there, pressing her into himself a little closer. He didn’t necessarily mean to make her feel his growing length, but he wouldn’t necessarily reject it either. He would be able to explain himself, even if Louise was crying her heart out against him now. He couldn’t exactly help this, could he? 

Everyone got lonely in here, she knew that. She heard them all talk about it at some point and she'd even seen that people in here had gotten in a relationship, even though they didn't necessarily seem to have anything in common other than the desire to be close. It was because of that that she didn't hesitate or find this particularly peculiar. What she did find strange, however was that when he pressed her closer, she felt something. It instantly caused her heart to race in slight panic as she tried to figure out what was happening. Was this an accident? Was he so deprived a single hug already got him hard? Was he trying to get sex out of this? She moved back a little now she'd stopped crying and looked up at him, curious to find out what he would do now she'd noticed he was aroused.

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kdstp:

The tears were going to come very soon, Ryan could hear that very clearly. Louise’s voice was breaking, and that indicated she was very close to not being able to hold it anymore. When that finally happened, Ryan closed the distance between them entirely and wrapped his arms around her to comfort her. He was often very affectionate, so it wasn’t weird for him to do any of this, but what Louise didn’t quite know was that this was currently doing a lot more to him than it should. There was still so much adrenaline, and the sobbing was so familiar that he couldn’t help but get slightly turned on by this. 

Louise’s face would soon be pressed against his chest, and he wondered whether there was still some blood on it. Fuck, he felt so amazing and he didn’t even think about feeling bad for it, even if he was practically turned on by Louise’s misery. 

“Don’t apologise.” He ended up saying, softly humming as he rubbed her back gently. “I understand that it can be hard to be here, but just remember that it’s worth it, alright.” He added. “I wasn’t always so sure either, but it really, really is worth it.” And today was simply proving that. 

Her stomach turned the moment Ryan wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer. She hadn’t had this kind of human contact in long and she couldn’t help but miss the comfort of it. So damn her for reveling in it now. It wasn’t weak, she was simply... recharging. She was pressed against his chest firmly, letting herself go for just a moment while she used him for the comfort he was giving her. She needed it.

She grabbed hold of his shirt, his words actually soothing her into a slightly calmer state. She noted that he smelled nice and it made her want to cling onto him and forget about the world she’d forced herself into. She didn’t regret it, but that didn’t make the reality of it any easier.

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kdstp:

Despite the fact that Louise and he had never actually spoken, she didn’t seem to be too afraid to confide in him. Perhaps that meant she felt a little lonely, which became especially clear by the nature of her problem. She wanted to be with her family, probably, but not enough to step away from what she was building here, even if the build up was going particularly slow for her. “How old is he?” He asked, wondering whether she would break down again if she would get some questions about her. He’d not mind having something that vulnerable in his arms for a little while. “People usually try to have parties when a birthday comes up. You’ve been away for a little while now, haven’t you?” He looked really apologetic now, which made him reach out and put his hand on her shoulder. He squeezed it slightly, and then let go. These kind of things had been hard for him too in the beginning. 

She watched him step closer, but didn’t mind it. In fact, she found it rather comforting, especially when he took hold of her shoulder. When she was little, she’d always gotten a lot of comfort out of her father, who was by far the most emotional one out of her parents, and who always understood whatever she was struggling with. “He’s thirteen today,” she replied, pursing her lips shortly, before looking up at Ryan. She had to bite her lip at what he said afterwards and she nodded in response. She often found it hard to mask her emotions when people were around, but this was hard.

“They’ve probably done something for him, I can’t imagine my parents not doing anything. That would just be cruel, no matter how--” she had to breathe in to stop her voice from breaking. “Sorry.” She moved her hand to her lips to try to breathe calmly and she closed her eyes. She was showing vulnerability and she knew that and didn’t like it, but there was nothing else for it. “No matter how that they are,” she finally finished when she had her voice a little more under control. “They probably think I’m dead... I don’t really understand how I have done that to them.” Her voice was breaking towards the end of the sentence and afterwards, she let out a soft sob and turned her head away to hide a little.

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kdstp:

Ryan nodded as though he understood. He did, but that wasn’t what he was in for. If he hadn’t done what he had just done, he probably wouldn’t be here to listen to the voice– and the aftermath– of crying. It rang through his mind. Crying. Screaming. And it felt good, it felt as though he was accomplished now. He could do something good, and potentially resolve some of Louise’s trouble if he really tried. Ah. Good. 

“If you’re just being silly, then tell me.” He smiled genuinely. He definitely didn’t mind having a conversation with this girl right now. Especially considering she was quite pretty, especially with red eyes like hers. “Don’t worry.” He added, coming much closer, until he was close enough to touch her if he were to want that. He decided to wait with that, though. 

Louise noted how Ryan stepped closer to her and she could see the look of concern was rather genuine. She brushed her fingers through her hair, trying to get it to sit a little better. The brown die had faded just slightly and her dirty blonde routs had started to come through, but she didn’t mind. It actually looked okay. Not that she had much of a choice as she had no idea whether she could dye it again in here anyway, especially not without Alice to tell her what the dye was. And she couldn’t see that happening any time soon.

She again wiped her eyes, hoping they weren’t too puffy. “I have a younger brother,” she started, “and it’s his birthday today. First one without me around and I just hope he’s alright.” She looked up at him, hoping he wasn’t going to just start laughing at her.

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Louise was having a bad day. Most of her days in here hadn’t been good–they’d improved at first, when she’d become the Master’s personal cook, but now that was normal too. When was she going to get ‘promoted’?

But she wasn’t sad because of that. She’d made the Master a good meal, one she could tell he was pleased with. (After so many times, she’d started to see the tiny signs of satisfaction and displeasure.) She was sad because it was her brother’s birthday today. She had no clue what her family had turned into when she’d disappeared from her school trip. She could only imagine how devastated they must be and how lonely her brother must feel. These thoughts were forbidden to her. She swore to lock them up and focus on what was important for her, for her own needs. It was beyond selfish, an action like this, but she had never pretended to be a good girl. On a day like this she just wished she could look through the window and see that they were at least having some fun, despite her not being there. Her brother didn’t deserve a bad life, just because she wasn’t in it.

She hadn’t been able to keep it in anymore and had gone off to one of the empty rooms, where she had a higher chance of finding some privacy. She just needed to calm herself down… but the moment she got there her tears were flowing freely and she couldn’t stop them from turning into full sobs. She had to get over herself.

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Life inside the Factory wasn’t easy. Everybody knew that. However, at a later point it would always get better, unless it didn’t. In these cases, it would end quite tragically, but nobody tended to pay much mind to that. That’s just what things were like in here, and although that was shocking at first, you got used to it just like you got used to anything else. It was quite literally as easy as that.

For some people, however, the entire thing would eventually turn a little bit competitive. Nobody wanted to keep working in the kitchen or with the cleaners. Everybody wanted to be sent on a job eventually, no matter how dangerous that would be. 

After two years or so of being here. this had finally become the case for Ryan, who now walked the halls of the Factory with the biggest grin on his face that he could manage to put on. He was shaking with adrenaline because of what he had just done, but that didn’t lessen the pride he felt. It almost felt like he had to tell someone about it, but that couldn’t happen unless it was really important, and this wasn’t. This was just a necessary kill, one of his firsts, but irrelevant to the rest of their case. 

He was walking towards the showers, but got distracted from doing that when he heard a noise he knew all too well. He’d just heard it, a scream coming from a woman after her son had been brutally murdered. After that, she’d gotten hit too, and a smirk had formed onto his face while his heart was beating insanely fast. Oh god, this was fucking appealing. 

He walking int he direction of the crying, very much wondering who it was this time. This happened quite a lot, but this was actually the first time he paid attention to it. The adrenaline had made him interested to hear. Perhaps he just wanted to make the feeling last a little bit longer, or perhaps he just wanted to comfort, do something else that’d feel good. 

He opened the door and looked inside. “Louise.” He said, acknowledging her. They had never actually spoken, but he would change that now. “What’s going on?” He tried, approaching her carefully as his heart was being extremely funny. God, why did this sound so fucking good? 

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She jumped the moment she heard the door open and she turned around, instantly wiping her cheeks dry. Shit, had she been so loud?

She took a deep breath and turned to face the guy who had entered. It was Ryan, she'd thought that was who that voice belonged to. They'd never really spoken, which didn't make her feel like she could pour her heart out to him.

"Nothing, it's fine, I'm just being silly," she said, wiping at her eyes again. It was a good thing she hadn't put on make up this morning. She gave him an apologetic smile, as if her crying had kept him from whatever he was doing, but that likely wasn't the case as it was late. "Just a long, tiring day."

[louiselyttleton-blog]

advantage

Louise was having a bad day. Most of her days in here hadn't been good--they'd improved at first, when she'd become the Master's personal cook, but now that was normal too. When was she going to get 'promoted'? But she wasn't sad because of that. She'd made the Master a good meal, one she could tell he was pleased with. (After so many times, she'd started to see the tiny signs of satisfaction and displeasure.) She was sad because it was her brother's birthday today. She had no clue what her family had turned into when she'd disappeared from her school trip. She could only imagine how devastated they must be and how lonely her brother must feel. These thoughts were forbidden to her. She swore to lock them up and focus on what was important for her, for her own needs. It was beyond selfish, an action like this, but she had never pretended to be a good girl. On a day like this she just wished she could look through the window and see that they were at least having some fun, despite her not being there. Her brother didn't deserve a bad life, just because she wasn't in it. She hadn't been able to keep it in anymore and had gone off to one of the empty rooms, where she had a higher chance of finding some privacy. She just needed to calm herself down... but the moment she got there her tears were flowing freely and she couldn't stop them from turning into full sobs. She had to get over herself.

[kdstp]

Initiation

[louiselyttleton-blog]

kdstp:

Although The Master didn’t quite want to admit this to himself, Louise had severely managed to speed up the process for herself. He hadn’t expected to pay her much mind until there would be time for it again, but now at least she was going to start climbing the ladder up to where she wanted to be. If she would manage to do that by being his personal cook, then that would be quite impressive, but they were nowhere near there yet. She needed to learn not to ask him anything and to simply do what he wanted without having to do so much as ask him, because that was what everybody else had learned to do. The exceptions—the ones who never ended up being that good—simply ended up where they were supposed to be; at the bottom, or dead.

“Surprise me.” He said, not giving her the slightest idea of what he might like. She’d have to guess it, or ask someone else, because he certainly wasn’t going to lay it all out before her. She’d have to learn how to get along with the others here anyway, so this might as well be how she’d do that. “Find the kitchen, surprise me.”

Louise waited patiently, the tenseness in her body almost causing her to tremble. Just being in his presence was already difficult--just looking at him made her hot all over--and being told what to do was even more stressful. “Of course, Master,” she replied quickly and nodded. She wasn’t going to disappoint him, even though the chances were pretty high that she might.

Louise turned around and walked away from his office. She didn’t even know what time he wanted to eat, but she’d have to ask someone to find out, as it was clear in his tone and way of speaking that he wasn’t going to tell her. She breathed in deeply when she was out of his sight. Her hands were trembling severely, but she was determined. She had to get this right.

She rushed towards where she’d seen Alice before and quickly found Trev, who she walked up to immediately. “Can I borrow you for just a few seconds? I need to ask you something.”