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@loutomvalleys-blog
Well hello to you too - It is I, the bitch, the honest one, Satan’s mistress; the various names you lashed at me last time I was here. Been quite a few months and most of you have yet to gain common sense but let’s be real, there is a better chance of the dinosauras coming back. Now, I’m not going to do what most do and go on how the house or the journey here but im going to sit back and sip my tea. Let the drama unfold.
Alright? --...Welcome back, you.
Honestly, How do y’all keep your new years resolutions? I made like three and I believe I’ve broken two and the third one is basically impossible.
Here’s a tip -- don’t set resolutions. They only limit yourself.
I was excited for a new year, but then I started thinking about the workload that would also come with it so I just ended up being stressed. At least I’m stressed in a place like Hawaii. Unless heat intensifies frustration, which.. makes it not so good. And I don’t think you actually wanted to hear someoene rant at you as soon as they came in. Sorry—.. I’m Jimin, by the way.
Hey now, mate. What’s got you all skittish? This is your vacation. The more you worry, the less enjoyable it’s going to be. Jimin, it’s a pleasure to meet you, I’m Louis.
I actually had a little journal of all the places that I’ve ever wanted to travel to. Of course, majority of them were all unmarked because I’ve never really racked up enough money to do as much travelling as I’d like to, but I’m hoping that it can change soon. Plus, I can now say that Hawaii is checked off for there. Yeah, yeah, that’s exactly it. We’re just a small fraction of what’s out there. – We were talking about our bedroom views, and you said you loved yours so I was wondering what the view was of. See, I got the bedroom that had a window directly in front of our neighbour’s house, but it was where our roofs connected. So, my view was practically being able to get onto the roof and just see our town in a higher angle.
Oh, it’ll change. Wait until your first check rolls around from this place. You meet people wanting to take you to extravagant places -- who knows? Show me that list and we can start to tack them all off. It’s doable now, more doable than it probably ever has been for you. Luckily that I was the oldest out of my siblings, I got the bigger room. The view from the window wasn’t the best, it overlooked the neighborhood but it wasn’t of great height. I loved to glance out of it when it was raining, thought that it always gave it a nice touch to the scenery. All you could see were tops of house and trees, it was nice.
No, I mean – you surely have your own resons to hate her. Not everyone is the same. It is.
I do, reason upon reason. It just hits personal, y’know? Things that are almost deemed completely unforgivable. How is that so old, huh?
Luckily you still look as good as ever,huh. Ah why thank you, i’m glad to be back. Are you going to throw a birthday party though,Tomlinson?
Old age hasn’t caught up with me yet which is definitely a blessing, that’s for sure. No birthday party that I know of, actually. I’m failing myself, I know.
It does make you lucky. And privilidged. Thank you, Louis.
How’ve you been, though?
Most of the time, perhaps.
Then what are we supposed to do? We’re damned if we do and damned if we don’t. What we say might make things harder but what we don’t say leaves us – like this. I can’t decide what wrong turn I’m meant to take in this situation. You know I’ve never been one for relationships, I’m not experienced. I’m just a mess but I hide it well…
I don’t know about you, C, but I’d rather just be damned if we do. Thinking that I could go, perhaps, all my life without hearing your word and saying mine would be far worse than us actually speaking about it. I don’t want to be like this forever, love. Not with you, not with how much you mean to me. You always say that you were shit at relationships, but I never thought that once. You don’t have to hide that with me, Cal.
What happened with you and your sister?
My depression was such a burden on poor little ol’ Lottie that she wished I were dead. If that doesn’t make you want to stop talking to your sister, I don’t know what does.
Do you miss her? I mean, she’s your sister. I can’t imagine not ever talking to my brother again. Oldie.
I might miss who she used to be. Who she is today? -- Would you think of me poorly if I said that I didn’t miss her? I’m only 24, that isn’t too old.
You do?
Of course, I do. You’re a tough nut to crack sometimes, y’know? But, you’re on of my best mates. That makes me pretty damn lucky, doesn’t it?
She sounds horrendous, I’m glad I wasn’t here to cross paths with her. Having a sibling on this show is kind of meant for disaster, I think. I know I’d go mental seeing my half-brother here. Good, then you’ll be receiving a box from me. I’m Jules, by the way.
Anyone who wasn’t on the show when she was to cross paths with her is extremely lucky. When you’ve got a great relationship with your sibling, it’s alright. If you’re not on good terms with them, that is when it gets rough. Jules, it’s very nice to meet you, I’m Louis.
How could you think so low of me? Honestly, do I look high to you? I’m offended, Louis. Had a couple things I needed to do, but I’m back now for good. Can’t get rid of me anymore.
Low of you? What makes you think that saying that means I think lowly of you? You have this smoulder look on your face that makes you seem high all the time. Glad to have you back now, yeah?
“Is that so? Yikes, I think you’ve been exposed, Lou. I think you’re just using me for my money. I almost feel betrayed. Ouch.”
“Using you for your money? I have my own money. Don’t try and flatter yourself too much, Summers.”
C’mon, mate. All siblings fight. Be the bigger person. Nothing planned? I’m sure everyone around here will fix that.
Siblings do fight, yes. I fight with Fizzy, Daisy, and Phoebe. But, Lottie? That isn’t fighting at all. That’s fucked up shit that I don’t want to ever deal with again, so she is completely nonexistent to me. Nothing at all -- I wouldn’t be surprised, so I agree with that.
You know it’s always been my coping mechanism.
Maybe we did it for the best, Lou – maybe we did it because we had no other choice. You know it would have only been harder if we hadn’t. I have many things I wanted to say, still want to say. Not everything just ends like that, but we never were conventional. I’m doing what I can, you know me, I’ve never needed anyone.
It always seems to be the easiest thing to do at the time, doesn’t it?
Do you really think that, C? That -- That avoiding each other, acting like we don’t exist, acting like everything is just -- is nothing? That it is all for the best? Because I don’t think that. At all. And I would love to talk about it, actually. I do. But, if you don’t -- then, so be it. I’ve only ever wanted what was best for you. Yeah -- right, you never did.
Do you like… even talk to her anymore or? Yup, oldie. Glad you agree with me.
No, I don’t -- She tried to visit me when I was in rehab after I left the show for a while, but I didn’t want to talk to her. I’ve really not talked to her since she left the show, actually. I’m nearly half way to thirty.
