Love Lost Letters

A collection of the bittersweet beauty of lost love and the letters describing what once was.

[lovelostletters]

A Love Letter Was Found On This 500 Year Old Body. Nothing Could Prepare Me For What It Said.

This will break your heart, 5 centuries in the making.

[lovelostletters]

An Exercise in Grief

I always save select text messages from my boyfriends while I'm dating them. At the end, I go through them and remember and feel and cry. Here are a few of my very favorite texts from [boyfriend].

I hope you don't mind, but it is still all so new to me. I'm so excited that even just cuddling and talking, I'm not quite comfortable.

Good morning, Princess.

You know I love how short you are, right? Busty and short, so fucking sexy.

You really are my favorite person just to sit and talk to.

Thank you for loving me. I love you so much.

I read that last one now and it stabs me in the heart with longing and desolation. It's the very last one of its kind, and I treasure it and I fear reading it.

[lovelostletters]

Footprints in our Hearts

16 year old girl to 16 year old boy, first relationship for each, on the back of a school photo, 6 months after breakup

Boyfriend, Some people enter our lives and leave quickly. Others stay for a while. But they all leave their footprints in our hearts, and we are never, ever the same. I will always remember you. Thanks you for changing me. Love, Girlfriend                              [phone number]

[lovelostletters]

Calm the Tumult

30 year old woman writing to ex-boyfriend, 26, still living with her in a separate room after two years cohabitating, post breakup of a 2.5 year relationship.

Boyfriend,

Thank you for the gifts. I didn't want to wake you - I know you came in late, and I am leaving very early for work. If we don't see each other before then, I will wake you the morning of the 23rd to exchange gifts.

I hope you can find peace with yourself and calm the tumult in your mind.

I would like to stay in touch. Please don't hesitate to contact me if you need anything - anything at all. I am here for you.

                                With Love,                                 Girlfriend

[lovelostletters]

I looked past that and kept seeing you behind the hair.

Man, aged 43, writing to a woman, divorced, aged 45. Engaged.

      Fiancée,               I need to put this in paper, as I don't think that I could find all the words while tring to look at you. That would require too much poise.               I truely hope the best for you (and your kids). I feel deep in my heart and my stomach, that you are making a big mistake and that you are letting us both down. You have "been building a case" against me for two years, and I Never knew. I didn't stand a chance!!!               After we talked all those times and had us back together, you obviously didn't pay much attention us as we talked. If you had, then all those "issues" over these two years would have been addressed and removed as they came up.               You did thinks to me, for me, and with me (thats because you said you enjoued seeing me happy, - Love) and when care so much about someone you do things to make them happy. YOUR WORDS!               I know how well we worked together and that was one of the best and most pleasant surprises, as I knew then, that when we dd this for our lives it would work.              I feel that you would do things to see if you would piss me off, like get those haircuts but I looked past that and kept seeing you behind the hair.             I am not poor little [fiance], and I do feel sorry for you. As you are a proud and stuborn lady. Reaching out is OK. You need to know that. But I feel that you never will, if it ever crossed your mind to do so.             I don't know what more that a person could look for in a mate, as far as me, I know that I can be STUBORN and pushy, but I like myself for being kind, and understanding, and supportive, giving. I would do anything to see you happy, SO ----- if this make you happy.

                                   GOD BLESS,                    AND GRANT YOU ALL                 THE BEST,                                             LOVE                                                  AND                                                       BYE BYE,                                                               [Fiance]        [cupid-arrow stricken           heart with contact                information]

Postscript upon a Post-It:  This is not all I wanted to say. I kept drifting too far ahead to pay attention to what I was writing.

[lovelostletters]

Diet Coke of Awesomeness

Woman, age 20, writing to future fiance, age 18. Not yet dating, relationship eventually lasting 1.75 years. On yellow legal pad.

Boy, I am writing this letter in order to confess my undying love for your friend, Bobby. Just kidding. I mean, he's nice and all, but I really like YOU. I think that you are cute, funny, and very street smart. But most importantly, you have some kickass facial hair. At one time I was concerned about the age difference, but when it comes down to it, that really doesn't matter because I think that you are mature for your age. So mature, in fact, that when I first met you, I thought you were older than me! But my real dilemma right now is figuring out what is going on betwixt you and this Jessica character. You and I have been hanging out a lot recently, and you have been spending time with her too. Now, I understand that none of this has actually been "official dating" or whatever, but you probably have been considering both of us as candidates. If not, I feel stupid and you shouldn't continue to read this. If so, then yay, and read on. I just need to know what your plans are with her because I don't want to get in the way if you are going to ask her out. I guess what I am really asking is: which one of us would you rather be with? Who do you have in the crosshairs? Because if I am just the diet coke of awesomeness (just one calorie, but not awesome enough), then I would definitely like for you to continue to pursue her. Girl PS Be surprised if you actually receive this because I am such a chicken about these things.

[lovelostletters]

Practice My Signature

Woman, age 21, writing to fiance, age 19. Engaged 1 month, dating for 7, lasting 1.75 years.

Johnnycakes     Hi Johnnycakes, look what you're making me do instead of my homework! You should be very ashamed of yourself! I try to go to school + get an education, but you keep monopolizing my thoughts when I'm trying to learn! --> Wondering what you're doing, what you're thinking, which boxers you're wearing, if your liking your lunch, are you thinking of me too, are you going to be able to visit everyone this weekend (Andy, Neil, Zack, bobby, matt, cass, cand, your grandparents, parents, brother, zack's parents), will there be enough time? I hope so. I hope you have lots of fun + do lots of visiting! Look at modems, and don't come home till monday night1 Do you want to see my practice new signature?[ Signature practice removed ] I've been doing a lot of practicing. I had to change how I make cursive capital T's. I used to make them like this [sic]. That's how they taught me to in 3rd grade, but I don't like the way they look. [ Practices Again ] They are harder to make too. I don't want to spend 10 minutes on signing a check. [ More Practice ] That's my impression of your signature, but with my name. Remember at my uncle's lakehouse, when you were rowing us across the lake to that island + people were boating by + making wakes. Our littl eboat was rocking so hard that I was almost positive we would flip. But we didn't. That was good times, just laying around all day on memorial day. We were going to go to Atanta that day, but we realized that everything would be closed. Then we did puzzles + ate all of the vanilla frosted mini wheats. Have a good trip to StL, and I'll see you when you get back!                    Girlfriend       P.S. I                                            ❤                                            you!

[lovelostletters]

Sorry For All The Times

Woman, age 30, written to man, age 26 on pink polka dot and multi-colored pastel argyle stationery, 3 months post dissolution of a 2.5 year relationship.

Dear Boyfriend, I wanted to say I'm sorry for all the times when you wanted to spend time with me, and I refused.  I can see now that you must have felt really neglected. I realize I let my fears and worries get the best of me. I stopped looking for new hobbies, stopped doing the things I enjoyed, basically just became a recluse. I relied on you to be everything, and that is completely unrealistic. It's far too much pressure - way too much to expect of one person. I need someone to complement me, not complete me.

I see now I became too needy, that I was lacking in self-confidence. I wanted you to make me feel better about myself, but the fact is I am the only person who can do that.  It is unrealistic to rely on someone else as the source for happiness. It's a wonderful thing that we were happy together - but when you became my only source of happiness, I became angry or sad when you weren't around - and that became very demanding for you. I know now it made you feel guilty, obligated, and eventually resentful towards me.

I fell in love with you for who you are - loving, dependable, trustworthy, responsible, generous, thoughtful, affectionate, intelligent.

I lost sight of you, of me, of us. I became consumed with an idea, but perfection is unattainable. It is too much pressure. I realize now that I don't have to be perfect to be worthy of love. Things go wrong sometimes - that's life. You have to take the good with the bad; otherwise, you wouldn't be able to recognize the good parts.

I'm sorry I took you for granted. In the future I am going to try really hard to be more aware and pay attention to the people I love and care about so that this doesn't happen again.

Thank you for helping me realize that.

                                      Love,                                    Girlfriend

[lovelostletters]

I Will Wait For Your Decision

Woman, age 30, written to man, age 26 on a sheet ripped from a corporate notepad, 2 weeks post dissolution of a 2.5 year relationship. Boyfriend - I love you. I will give you the time and space you need. Please come back to me. I love you so very much - I am so sorry I didn't show you it enough. I will wait for your decision.                                I Love You.                                    Girlfriend

[lovelostletters]

Now You Have A Vase

Note sent to ex-girlfriend with flowers, on florist's stationery, post breakup of a 10 month relationship.

I WAS TAUGHT BY SOMEONE VERY DEAR TO ME ITS THE LITTLE THINGS THAT MAKE THE ONES WE LOVE SMILE PS NOW YOU HAVE A VASE FOR YOUR FLOWERS ENJOY YOUR DAY BEAUTIFUL [BOYFRIEND]

[lovelostletters]

I Cherish You

Female, aged 23, writing to male, aged 27, regarding a current 7-month relationship eventually lasting 9 months. On pink (#F0BDCA) personalized, embossed stationery.

Dear Boyfriend,

      Each day I'm reminded of things that are great about you & you remind me of how blessed I am to be your girlfriend.  Being in a relationship with you has helped me recognize the incorrect (typically romanticized) beliefs I have held about what it means to love someone. You love people for who they really are - the good & the bad. I'm so thankful that God has placed you in my life. I've realized that no matter what happens, my relationship with you is one of the most important I will have in my life. You challenge me to work on my issues, to raise my expectations for myself, and to continue to grow into the person I hope to be. For these things & many more, I cherish you.

                                                                                 Love,                                                                                  Girlfriend