Ash

Hey :]  Just a 17 year old on this side trying to get out of a slump life has decided to throw and vibes to music, books, and poetry. Loves K-pop(stans BTS and is a casual listeners to others) and anime(up for recs). Here to dump all irl and find some solace in just pouring my thoughts outside and try and recognise my feelings. I want this to be a safe place for me since I have been struggling a bit recently :) If someone does stumble upon the account, I hope you are ok :) and things will get better eventually don't worry. Feel free to message if you want to talk. Just hang in there.

[loveskyandcozycafes]

Maybe

Maybe I realised

why people believe in afterlife

they believe in it

In hope of being reunited

To the souls they lost

In the journey of finding

Their own

[loveskyandcozycafes]

How to know if you have a heart?

[loveskyandcozycafes]

Welp Hello again

[loveskyandcozycafes]

Sometimes, you can receive B‘s in your life

Yeah, hey, you can also receive B‘s

It could keep raining for days

Even in that desert, it might rain

But, I’m sorry, I can’t give up on myself

I can’t let go of me who I know as myself

because you, in my head, are so whole like this

because you are so perfect

~uh good, Mono by RM

Lyrics by Doolset Bangtan:

어긋 (uhgood)

  Produced by Sam Klempner Written by Sam Klempner, RM Spotify | Apple Music Note: Original lyrics are transcribed. Two meanings of 어긋 (uh-g

I know I should accept myself. I know I won't be perfect everytime, I know I can't. But how? How do I forget everything I wanted since childhood? How do I give up on dreams and ideal of myself which i held for a decade?

[loveskyandcozycafes]

Its ok if you want to cry.

Its ok baby.

You don't need to be strong all the time.

Its ok to crumble.

Remember you are human.

Its ok to let that smile slip past your face,

if I'll get to see your genuine smile,

past the tears

if you feel relieved.

Its ok.

[loveskyandcozycafes]

Life has a tendency to throw one off the hook, multiple times, always testing one's tenacity. Please hold on. I know its difficult, but please hold on. This world even though corrupted still has its innocence, and I hope that you learn to recognise it. Be it in the fleeting clouds up in the sky or a hummingbird around a plant. Please don't lose hope.

[loveskyandcozycafes]

Sometimes I see such absurd things related to women and it honestly makes me so mad. And if I call them out then I am a 'toxic feminist' and a child. Like what's the point?

[quotemadness]

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.”

— Steve Maraboli

[loveskyandcozycafes]

Its ok not to be ok :)

[loveskyandcozycafes]

Well i can recommend music here right?

So Do listen to Uh good by RM

For translations:-

https://doolsetbangtan.wordpress.com/2018/10/25/uhgood/

This is a song i relate to the most at this point of my life. so I thought why not?

[loveskyandcozycafes]

Mono is like a gentle hug. Just reminding that its ok to cry, to be sad, to be alone, to be scared, to be angry. He really gave his all in it and whenever i listen to it i feel like floating into thin air due to all the happiness.

[loveskyandcozycafes]

I know you are striving for your utopia. I know you want to be happy and are looking for happiness in the long run. Maybe after high school, maybe after college, maybe after job, maybe after n no. of things. But please don't sacrifice your happiness for today. We don't know whats gonna happen in the future. Don't waste your chances to be happy Now. Go to someone you love hug them tight and tell them you love them and if you dont have them with you just hug yourself and tell yourself how proud you are of yourself to reach this far, and be grateful for a new day.

[loveskyandcozycafes]

Hey Love :)

I just hope that you believe in yourself. I know there are a lot of outside forces always just waiting to break your resolve, your will, But always remember that their voices don't matter unless you let them in. Just be you and believe in yourself.

[loveskyandcozycafes]

I wish I was like the sky. The sky is the same but it changes everyday, and still remains the same. I wish I was the same.

[loveskyandcozycafes]

Sometimes I think what if I fail? Will I have the strength to be this resilient? To get back up and try again? Or to give up on a dream I held for a decade? What if I don't make it? It scares me. It scares me so much because I don't know if I will have the strength to fight again. But for now I can only try. Try everyday because that's all I can do, and hope that when the time comes this world will treat my soul good and If my wings are hurt I'll have the strength to walk and fly again. I can only hope.

[loveskyandcozycafes]

Scars

I once read in a taejin fanfic on wattpad by ukiyo_0701 “Scars don’t ruin your beauty, they prove you fought and won”. This sentence hit me deeply. We all are hurt in some ways or the other. Its difficult to navigate this world and not get your innocence trampled upon by it. I have scars, some run even deeper than my soul and I know i will carry their aftereffects throughout my life. And hence I try to bury them deep. I try to numb myself in order to move on. Is that good? No. But how can I accept my faults? my mistakes? the ordeals that i faced? I don’t know. But after reading this I just know one thing that these scars are what made me today who I am. There are many things I am not proud of but eventually i will learn and I will carry these scars as a badge of honor. As a sign that I did well and lived again.

[ariwtf-deactivated20230226]

“My life is one big coincidence”

“Coinciding with?”

The idea of being common and being part of a crowd feels disappointing and insignificant. But how many times do we feel a sense of isolation when we are truly alone? When we are distinctive and without a heart to warm our hands. The feeling of isolation- the yearning- to belong. That despite being different and one of a kind, we still wish we were kindred with someone. We pray that we were meant to coincide with someone else, meant to make happy accidents. We wait for someone to grab our protective hands off of our hearts and steal the muscle out of our chest. Standing outside of a crowd, we burn with this scorching feeling of desolation, asking someone to be companions to our shadows.

We may be among a crowd, simply coinciding with each other in the same spaces as everything that may be unimportant. But perhaps that’s where we find our belonging. In small instances of humanity- in the small words we utter at the same time, the thoughts that sync with strangers and fears that hide in familiar spaces.