the front door to my back room

I do art. you can support me here https://ko-fi.com/loycos

[loycos]

Decided to organize my blog a little

#my art - for my art

#arcane analysis - if you wanna read my ramblings

#fandom musings - for me bitching and moaning about fandom stuff

Its all from the last few years- i didnt really want to go back all the way to the beginning of my blog, which turned 10 (!!) recently.

you can support me here

[loycos]

Yoooo! Your illustrations are cinema! You make awesome analysis posts and do fanart too? What can't you do? Out of curiosity, how long have you been making fanart and do you happen to be on other platforms?

Oh thank you! I just think about fictional characters too much.

I dont have any other platform i post my art/analysis on, though i go on reddit sometimes. I've been making fanart since I was a child, so you could say i've been doing this my whole life haha.

[loycos]

You're my hero! Thank you so much for drawing them again (especially in their 2xko fits). It's perfect! Does this mark your return to creating art or is this just a one time miracle?

Haha, youre welcome! I wanted to draw them in that style for a while, that was the perfect excuse. As for your question, i dont want to promise anything cause i just suck at that. I have ideas i still want to execute, some i already started working on, though the hard part is finishing them.

[loycos]

Will you ever return to drawing Caitvi? I think their 2xko fits would look phenomenal with your rendering. Honestly, I just miss seeing your art haha.

here u go!

[loycos]

sorry if you already posted about this, but I’d really like to hear your take on the closing line “I’m the dirt under your nails, cupcake.”

I think i touched on it in the past, but never dwelved too deeply into the line itself. To me, this line is more tied to Caitlyn's arc than to Vi's- Caitlyn having to live with her past mistakes, things she can't change (clean out). I'm thinking about making a whole analysis about Caitlyn's perfectionism, and how she tends to overthink her past actions and obsessively try to "fix" them. this line from Vi directly addresses that.

The direct line is more tied to Caitlyn's arc, but the line's implication also ties into Vi's arc. Vi's arc in the show was about learning to put herself first, instead of trying to fill other people's needs. The implication from this line is that Vi is going to stick with Caitlyn from now on, and as we saw in episode 8, Caitlyn is Vi's "selfish" desire- the first decision she made to prioritize her own happiness. I think many people miss that point, cause they see the whole Jinx vs. Caitlyn dilemma as 'Vi choosing one means she puts that person over herself' but that's not what the show was going for. Jinx and Cait represent past vs. future, commitment vs indulgence. Vi doesn't feel obligated to Caitlyn the same way she does Jinx, nor does she feel personally responsible for Caitlyn's actions. Caitlyn is just objectively the healthier choice for Vi, as Vi stays not because she has to, but because she wants to.

That line is the last spoken dialog in the show, and as such, i think it also tries to tie the entire show's themes together. Arcane is a show about 2 cities and their struggles, among themsleves and against each other. The show doesn't try to paint certain perspectives as "bad" or "good". It shows you how different people living different lives came to believe in the things they do. Caitvi's final dialog- "Are you still in this fight" "I'm the dirt under you nails, nothing will clean me out"- implies that despite the dirty history, the two cities will have to move forward together and actively work (fight) for a better future. This isn't a happily ever after, it's a work in progress type of ending- which is much more realistic and optimistic- perfect for a show like Arcane.

[loycos]

I have a very important question for you..

Do you think Vi is really that impatient? It was mentioned in arcane twice. By Sevika during her fight with Vi. And then Vi said it herself before she took out Ambessa. I would like to argue that, after 7 years in prison, Vi has more patience than she and anyone else gives her credit for.

hmm, I think i'll disagree with you here. Vi is pretty impatient. Her time in prison doesn't prove otherwise- it just physically stopped her from doing anything for 7 years. The moment she got out, she was back to her old ways. If you lock an impatient person in a room it doesnt make them less impatient, it just prevents them from acting on their whims. Vi is always quick to react- it often gets her in trouble. You can call it reckless more than impatient- but they do go hand in hand sometimes. I think this is what other characters refer to when they call her that.

Another thing is that Vi's honesty also comes from a place of impatience. She quickly addresses issues instead of threading carefully around the bush, and again it can get her in trouble. Vi is just not the type of character that sits in inaction- she's always on the move doing something. She doesnt sit around and wait. So yes, i would consider her impatient.

[loycos]

Do you write fanfic? (V important question)

Been on a CaitVi kick and tired of how Caitlyn is written sometimes. Sometimes she feels like a side character in a Vi centered fic. Other times I don’t even recognize her. (people can do what they want). But I love her dearly and will pick apart the inconsistencies

I am starting to write fics and find it easiest to write from Caitlyn POV (mainly because Im obsessed with her and partially because I see a lot of myself in her). also your Caitlyn analysis’ have been really helpful for me to write her character in a way that honors personality. Hope that’s okay!

Anyway, love your art, love your words, love your blog. Thanks for doing what you do

Did I mention I am obsessed with Caitlyn Kiramman?? Maybe I’m just on a Caitlyn kick

thank you so much for your kind words!

Like you, i come in and out of reading fics cause I'm just too picky. I like my Caitvi neat. I think Caitlyn is written ooc often and she is my favorite character, so i offer my endless analysis instead. but Vi is also written ooc. She's written without any edge, charisma of bravado- which is what makes her, yknow, extremely hot? she also shows no sign of violence in most fics- Vi likes fighting, and for some reason people think lifting weights will fill that void for her. I think as a fandom we focus too much on the moments Vi crys after losing loved ones, and too little on the moments she's a a rough ex prisoner who's life expreiences made her tougher and stronger. Fanfic Vi is so sanded down it's actively an ick for me. Maybe one day i'll make a Vi analysis regarding this.

To answer your question: do i write fanfiction? Ive written one fic in my life. I am kind of interested in doing it again, but (i know its gonna sound insane) words arent easy for me. English isn't my first language so my vocabulary is pretty limited, and despite having a lot of thoughts, it takes me hours, days, to put them down into somewhat cohesive rambles. The fic i did write was from Vi's perspective, cause it fit the story i wanted to tell better, but i was struggling with it the whole way through- im more of a Caitlyn-brained person.

If you end up writing them, I'd love to read it!!🙏 and thank you again for your compliments!

[okthatsgreat]

i <3 when women characters feel they aren't able to express sadness in "normal" ways because they don't feel safe enough to cry in their environment so instead they opt for the more acceptable strong emotion of rage and they get recklessly angry at the people around them in fits of misplaced sadness and terror and make irreversible decisions and hurt others. i dont care as much when this happens to a man

[loycos]

I love that you’re one of the few who recognize the insane double standards with this ship. Vi was furious that Caitlyn dared to arrest the violent terrorist and murderer of her mother! She wanted Caitlyn to be grateful to her! Amazing! And when someone asks if that was right it’s almost apologetic because the idea that Vi might not be perfect all the time and Caitlyn might deserve a little better sometimes even after all her mistakes is almost an offense.

Everything from the moment they met at the commune really goes to show how much Caitlyn loves Vi. I adore this ship but since they saw each other again to how she let Jinx go for Vi I was thinking Caitlyn get up girl lmao

And to think that so many shippers and Caitlyn fans believe she still needs to be compliant and deferential around Vi post canon as proper punishment and reparation WTF why would anyone want that kind of dynamic for those two?!?

i will say this. In every Caitvi arguement, they're both right and both wrong, in different ways. Vi was being insensetive to Caitlyn's feelings in this specific arguement because she has her own trauma from being in prison. Her lash out is very understandable. She was emotional and failed to consider how Caitlyn might feel in this scenario- its very human. Caitlyn does this as well, for example, offering Vi the badge, because in her emotional state she didnt consider how it might make Vi feel. What i find annoying is the fandom deciding that when one of them does it, its understandable, and when the other does it, its inexcusable. Theyre both humans, theyre bound to sometimes prioritize their own perspective over their loved ones. This doesnt make their relationship toxic, as we see multiple times that they try to see the other's perspective, which is what a healthy couple would do. But the idea you can go about life and never disappoint, upset, or react irrationally to loved ones- is absurd.

When youre in a relationship with someone, a romantic relationship- you are both equal. You cannot expect one person to constantly give more than the other, you cannot expect your partner to treat you like a child because of predetermined notions about you- such as your upbringing, mental health, etc. By doing that you create an unbalanced dynamic, that could easily lead to toxicity. Caitvi avoids that dynamic because they treat each other as EQUALS, while acknowledging their differences. Its ironic, people in the fandom try to force the imbalance on them, based on their class alone, even though this is not what their relationship is like at all. I just mostly feel bad for people like that, cause i doubt theyve even experienced a healthy relationship, or any relationship at all. having this approach will not get them one either.

[loycos]

Hi! Can you tell me something about Caitlyn? I love her so much. I’d really be happy with anything

omg hi! Me too!

Ill elaborate on something I noticed in one of my previous posts. Caitlyn hides behind her anger a lot, in fact, it is so consistent i can only think of one time in the show her anger is 100% genuine and not a front to cover for deeper emotions she doesnt want to confront.

That one time is here:

Caitlyn recently found out about just how much she was kept in the dark about the reality of Zaun, and the weight Piltover's council (and by extension, her mother) carry in that state. She is frustrated over not knowing something, but mostly angry at her mother, for idealistic reasons. Caitlyn's relationship with her mother was already pretty rocky, and this just added to the pile. So this is Caitlyn feeling angry and reacting with anger, very direct, very honest, we love to see it. A rare occasion for her.

Any other time, and that includes actual crash outs or just minor tantrums- it's either to cover for something else or played up to avoid other emotions she has going. The 2 main ones are feeling hurt, and shame. Both emotions that leave Caitlyn vulnerable, and so she defaults to anger to distract from them.

Let's be real for a second. Have any of you (dear anon and fellow Caitlyn enjoyers) ever considered Caitlyn an angry character? I know i haven't. That is something i'd probably assign to Vi before I do to Cait. That being said, Caitlyn almost always reacts to the feeling vulnerable with aggression. She is surprisingly conforntational, in a way that i never really noticed. The thing is, her anger is rarely ever scary, so I think it's easy to write it off. I bet most of you remember her as much less prickly than she actually is.

But alas, let me show you what i mean. And no gifs this time, sorry guys, it takes me hours to find them and i want to be done with this post today.

"I don't need charity, councilor, yours or my parents'. Get out." (To Jayce, 1x04)

why so mean, Cait? Your friend is trying to look out for you- oh it's cause you feel betrayed by him picking your parents' position and using the same tactics they do to dismiss your agency? Yeah that tracks.

"Unbelieveable. I didnt break you out of jail to eat slop! I knew this was a terrible idea. You dont actually know anything, do you?!" (To Vi, 1x05)

Here you can see Caitlyn is really embarrassed. She trusted Vi and Vi betrayed that trust, playing her for a fool.

"Excuse me??? I will NOT." (To Vi, 1x05)

Yet again, Caitlyn is embarrassed. She is already in a situation she finds uncomfortable, and Vi is clearly doing all of this to get a rise out of her, instead of helping with her investigation.

"I knew it was a mistake trusting you!" (To Vi, 1x07)

Embarrassed again.

"I- i thought they were hurting you!" (To Vi, 1x07)

You guessed it. Embarrassed.

"and then there's Jinx. Laughing." (To Jayce, 2x01)

Straight after bringing up seeing her dead mother's body, as an attempt to avoid opening up to Jayce about it.

"What kind of--- animals-" (To Vi, 2x01)

The anger is genuine but played up to cover for her feeling helpless and scared.

"Get out the way! Move!!!" (To Vi, 2x03)

played up to cover her panic.

"It's her blood in your veins!" (To Vi, 2x03)

Genuine, but played up to cover feeling betrayed and hurt.

"you think im so daft i cant recognize a contingency?!" (To Vi, 2x08)

Hurt by Vi's lack of trust in her.

"No amount of good deeds can undo our crimes!" (To Jinx, 2x08)

Caitlyn feels shame over her past mistakes. I also think she plays up the anger cause she feels extremely uneasy around Jinx (who, need I remind you, assaulted her in the shower). of course it is also genuine anger, cause dead mother, but around Jinx it looks like Caitlyn is ruffling her feathers to appear intimidating. very noticable in the tea party scene, which happened BEFORE her mother died but after she was abducted.

Caitlyn's anger is a part of the mask i talked about here. She uses it when she wants to appear respectable and avoid vulnerability- which can be seen in all the cases I brought up. It is also why many people who love Caitlyn and understand her character don't feel like she's an angry character- because her anger isn't entirely genuine most of the time, unlike Vi, for example, whose emotions are always honest. Caitlyn operates a little differently. When she lashes out she often feels like a wounded animal trying to bite. Pathetic little creature.

If you saw through her mask, and realized her anger is mostly played up- congratulations! You get a media literacy award, and youre not allowed on tiktok anymore. But also remember, some people can't see the layer underneath it, and to them she appears much more unpleasant. in fact, a lot of fans of Cait see under her mask so well they accidentally forget she doesn't talk and emote as sweetly and honestly as they probably remember.

[loycos]

alrighty, after my previous analysis-es, I want to take a look at Vi and Caitlyn's interactions, specifically their dialog, throughout the show. precisely because it actually is very different than their touch language, in particular on Caitlyn's end.

I think no one would be surprised to learn that Vi is a very openly emotional person. Not only does she allow herself to be consumed by her feelings unabashedly

but she's also in touch enough with herself to effectively verbally communicate how she feels.

That last part throws a lot of people off- because Vi does have some walls she put up for proterction, in particular in front of strangers. I think her aggressive attitude and tendency to run away make people mistakenly assume she's a closed off person, but she most definitely isn't. People who are close to Vi get to see her be vulnerable- Caitlyn, Jinx, Ekko, Vander, and ever Loris. When Vi feels an emotion, she doesn't try to bury or hide it- she let's it come to the surface.

Cut to her Very emotionally repressed girlfriend, who not only buries her emotions on the regular, but also is completely clueless on how to voice them. when Caitlyn wants to express how she feels, she usually talks about the matter-of-fact, the dry details, to imply what she actually wants to say. that's why analyzing Caitlyn feels like decoding a cryptid message.

I think a lot of people miss this detail, because both Caitlyn and Vi are direct and honest people. the difference is, Vi is direct and honest through and through- whether the subject matter is casual or extremely sensetive to her. Caitlyn's directness comes in her matter of fact-ness. when it comes to subjects that are about her own emotions, she doesn't lie- but she often talks indirectly, or chooses to not speak at all.

and that's why Caitvi work so well- because Vi absolutely gets what Caitlyn is trying to say. she is a master at decoding Caitlyn's indirect backhanded language. and that's a big reason why Caitlyn feels so seen by Vi.

Just like ther touch language, the way each girl expresses herself verbally has direct ties to how they were raised.

Let's start by examining Caitlyn and her dad. Supposedly, according to the fandom, Cait's dad is the parent who gets her the most. well, maybe when the competition is Cassandra Kiramman, this isn't such a high praise. I'd argue neither one of Caitlyn's parents truly get her. In general, the Kirammans seem to not quite be able to communicate in a vulnerable way, despite clearly loving each other.

in this scene, Caitlyn is trying to express a very clear message to her dad.

translation: I feel guilty for Mother's death.

you'll notice she states a fact ("I had the shot") instead of openly expressing how she feels.

in return, her dad either 1. doesn't get that subtext from what she's saying, or 2. agrees with the subtext and decides not to challenge it. because I don't think Tobias is a bad parent, i'll go with the first option. But it still leaves Caitlyn feeling misunderstood, and her emotional needs unmet. it's not entirely Tobias' fault- he's grieving too, and his daughter isn't exactly spelling it out for him. But if anything, this scene shows you exactly how the Kirammans operate an emotionally raw situation- that is to say. they don't.

(Caitlyn also has no idea how to comfort her father)

compare this to the environment Vi grew up in.

Vi was always an open person- we see it in the way she openly grieves her parents in the very first scene in the show.

She was later raised by Vander, who himself was an honest man. Here's young Vi talking to her dad:

during their conversations, both Vi and Vander are communicating openly. Vi feels like she can be vulnerable around Vander, and he in turn takes her seriously, doesn't try to hide things from her just because they might hurt. that is the complete opposite to how Caitlyn was raised- she was protected, but also coddled. Vi expreienced the harsh reality growing up, but she had a mentor who was honest with her and gave her a place she could emotionally express herself. Caitlyn grew up being kept away from any pain or danger- away from the "real world"- but in return her mentors were much less emotionally available, and prioritized composure over vulnerabilty.

here's what happens when these 2 very different upbrinings clash.

Caitlyn is delivering one of her most vulnerable dialogs on screen, yet she keeps it to the facts; on the surface, she is talking about the literal vacuum her mother left, that she's now expected to fill- the legacy and responsibilty she enherited. however, the subtext here is Caitlyn trying to express the sadness, the loss and the grief she feels. Vi, who is used to open communication, sees through the first layer and addresses the subtext head on.

and so, Caitlyn feels seen, understood, despite never actually saying anything directly. Vi meets her at her own level, and Vi knows how to effectively comfort her.

most of Vi and Cait's scenes together are ruled by this dynamic seen above. Vi is the open one, leading most of their dialog. she will bring up things that hurt. she will say the quiet part out loud. she will confront the problem head on. on the other hand, Caitlyn is usually on the back foot of the dialog, replying rather than initiating. her words are short and indirect. more often than not, she stays silent.

let's look at some more examples.

im this scene, Vi, as usual, wears her heart on her sleeve. she expresses her biggest fear to Caitlyn- "everyone in my life has changed", and clearly communicates what she needs- "promise me you won't change". right before this scene, she apologizes to Caitlyn for her loss, relating to her pain- "I'm so sorry about your mother, I'm sorry I can't bring her back".

Caitlyn, uhh, well...

she starts the scene in her dry, militant way, and as Vi gets more emotional, she gets quieter and quieter. this gif is the last time she speaks in this scene, before her infamously cryptic "I won't". her words are unclear or sticking to facts, making her almost come across as cold. and the thing is, Caitlyn knows this. She knows her words don't offer comfort- and that's why, in this moment, she uses her touch to comfort Vi. because Caitlyn struggles when it comes to verbally expressing emotions, but her touch is always soft and warm.

here's another example.

Vi comes in this scene and just bombards Caitlyn with accusations. notice how she addresses all of her issues directly: Caitlyn being "ungrateful" to Jinx, her distrust in Caitlyn, her disappointment in Caitlyn's professional affair with Ambessa.

as for Caitlyn- she's on the back foot, as she often is when it's a dialog heavy Caitvi scene. notice how she doesn't state what she thinks directly, instead she's being the queen of passive aggressive sass.

what she says are the facts. You didn't let me in on the plan, you had Jinx there because of a contigency. the translation: "i'm hurt that you didn't trust me." but Caitlyn can't just admit that openly like Vi does.

The only time Caitlyn drops her defenses in this scene is when she admits her awareness of her wrongdoings.

"I know!"

this is the only direct admition we get, and it came cause Vi pushed her all the way against the wall and provoked her, which is something Vi is notoriously good at.

the second time she admits it is here, and she's back to her nondirect, vague language.

she's referncing a mysterious "collective", to avoid talking about herself directly... where else have I seen this?

translation: I can't erase my mistakes / i'm just like you. but Caitlyn doesn't make it personal. this phrasing makes the things she says, that are technically more subjective, sound grounded and objective.

Vi, of course, is as direct and personal as ever. and again it kind of looks like she answers Caitlyn's subtext rather than what she's saying on the surface, though this isn't as clear in this example.

Lets circle all the way back to this scene.

I think in the overall excitement of the fandom upon recieving this scene, plus the memeification that it went through, we all forgot that this is an objectively unromantic and strange thing to say. On the surface, it's a dry fact about a military operation. But after reading through this entire analysis, isnt this just the most Caitlyn line ever? And of course, the subtext here is abundant.

Translation: i knew you would go look for your sister, and I've decided to put my hate for her behind for you. I understand you will forever love your family and I'm not asking you to choose between us anymore. And more generally, I'm sorry and I love you, at the same time.

And the best thing? Vi gets it. Because she understands Caitlyn's indirect language more than anyone else.

So, in conclusion. Why all this matters? Well, truthfully, I'm just sick of the constant "Caitlyn didn't apologize" takes, that for some reason expected Caitlyn to sit down and directly say "I'm sorry" to the camera. I hope I explained why making this claim, or worse, trying to "fix it fic" is absurdly out of character. If youre a Caitlyn enjoyer, why erase her unique characterization for the sake of simplicity?

Not only is it out of character for Caitlyn, it's also out of character for Vi to ever demand that of her. Vi loves Caitlyn and underatands her cues. Just because an invisible audience needs things spelled out for them, doesn't mean the characters need it too. Vi gets what Caitlyn is saying regardless of whether she says it directly or not- that's part of the charm of their dynamic. That "imbalance" in how they express themselves isn't something that HAS to be solved- they clearly know how to work around it. And to me, that makes their relstionship feel more realistic and fleshed out.

Now that we addressed the fans- doesn't this also explain why so many people seem to get drastically different readings on Cait? Unlike Vi, whether you pick up on Caitlyn's subtext and body language or not, you'll get a whole different character. I suspect a lot of people who hate Caitlyn only read her at face value, based on what she says alone. By doing that, they get a much drier, angrier character than she actually is. and of course, Vi's devotion and attraction to her makes no sense if that's the only thing you see.

[loycos]

i want to add a few things to this analysis. Originally, when I set out to write it, i wanted to go in depth about a bunch of other Caitvi scenes and examine their dialog- but a lot of Caitvi dialog scenes are basically just "Vi talking openly and Caitlyn is also there". Which says a lot about Caitlyn's character, but doesnt really provide an example of how she expresses herself.

It's not to say Caitlyn can't provide emotional support when needed. We see that she can she her words to effectively comfort to people.

However, Caitlyn quiets down when one of 2 scenarios plays. 1. whenever Caitlyn's own emotions get involved, and 2. When Vi gets really emotional and vulnerable, and Caitlyn seemingly doesn't know how to verbally comfort her.

The first scenario can be seen here.

Vi is finally opening up to Cait. her usual demeanor around her up till that point, which involved sarcasm and aggression, is completely dropped. That is the first time she lets her defenses around Caitlyn fully drop.

Caitlyn is extremely touched by that, and devestated by the idea of never seeing Vi again. She doesnt say a word during this entire scene, overwhelmed with emotions.

Second scenario can be seen here.

Vi again is the one speaking. She tells Caitlyn about her biggest regret, of leaving her sister behind in a moment of anger.

Caitlyn offers her verbal support in the beginning of the scene. (notice how she's addressing something Vi never actually told her directly- Caitlyn is just as capable of reading between Vi's lines.)

But yet again, as Vi gets more emotional and vulnerable, Caitlyn gets quiter. I think she doesn't know how to comfort Vi verbally at this point, and just like with their first kiss, she uses touch to bridge that gap.

Which brings us to this scene.

On the surface, Vi is angry at the ignorance of the council and topside in general. But the subtext is, she is disillusioned, disappointed that she ever let herself believe that maybe Caitlyn was different, that they can have a genuine bond that isnt affected by their backgeounds.

"We tried, okay? It wasn't enough. Topside and bottom, oil and water, that's all there is!"

And for the first, and ONLY time in the entire show, it is Caitlyn who brings the subtext to the surface.

I dont think people understand how huge this is. Caitlyn never addresses emotions verbally. Caitlyn doesn't like leaving herself vulnerable. But she is sensing that Vi closing up to her, and she can't reach out to touch her- you can see her trying in the beginning of the scene- so, she is forced to voice her emotions. She metaphorically has her back to the wall again, just like we saw in their fight scene in 2x08. Vi definitely has that grip on Caitlyn- she is the only person that can force Cait to be this direct- but you can tell it's not something that comes naturally to her.

And because it's Vi were talking about, she's being honest through and through. She just answers Caitlyn's question directly.

This scene is also why i think 90% of the fandom thinks Caitlyn is the emotionally open half of the pairing, while Vi is cagey and indirect. sadly, we zoomed in on the one time they flipped the script, and kind of ignored the nuance of the situation. This is the exception, not the rule.

Despite the surprise little Uno reverse we got, this scene still follows the usual Caitvi dialog dynamics- Vi is leading the conversation, Caitlyn is on the back foot. Vi speaks openly and at length, Caitlyn is short on words, sticking to the matter of fact (she's trying to find a solution instead of addressing the feelings- "there must be something else we can do" "i can fix this").

Another scene i want to elaborate on. Let's talk talk about Caitlyn actually apologizing, and what it looks like.

We can all agree Caitlyn is apologizing here, right? Even though it is not a direct "I'm sorry"- she admits she made a mistake. Caitlyn likes sticking to facts and actions, rather than describing how she feels. Its not "I'm sorry", it's "I shouldnt have done this". It's not "I'm guilty", it's "I couldve prevented it". It's action based talk, which is deeply related to her relationship with responsibility and power.

Vi knows all of this. This is why after Caitlyn admits her mistakes in their argument in 2x08, Vi goes softer, dropping her anger for genuineness. She knows Caitlyn is sorry, and she knows Caitlyn won't say it out loud. Vi didn't fall in love with Caitlyn for her words, she fell in love with the person Caitlyn showed her she is through her actions. And luckily, unlike with words, Caitlyn is exceptional at making non-verbal gestures.

and one last thing. Remember how in the scene of their first kiss, Vi openly expresses to Caitlyn how she feels and what she needs Caitlyn to do to comfort her? Here's the Caitlyn version of it.

The translation: "i'm terrified of her, please come with me". She tells Vi how she feels and what she needs Vi to do to comfort her. She just does it Caitlynly- indirect and vague. I know a lot of people like focusing on Caitlyn's vengeful feelings towards Jinx, but to me, her absolute insistence that Vi joins her in this quest comes from a place of fear- though Cait would never outright admit it.

Vi gets it anyway.

Again, they express themselves very differently, but they know how to read each other perfectly well.

[loycos]

Hello. A follower. Saw recent caitvi post and I LOVED it. And I wanted your opinion on something: Do you think when an enraged Vi confronted Caitlyn about Jinx being imprisoned, that she was being unfair to Caitlyn? And I am NOT hating on Vi or even Jinx (although I do think the fandom can sometimes baby her) and I fully acknowledge all the wrong stuff Caitlyn did. But Caitlyn had to help her tormentor, kidnapper, and mother's killer and then found out the woman she loves secrelty worked with her. And now Vi, who Caitlyn cried to because of her mother's death, is angrily defending Jinx. AGain, I am NOT anti Vi, I completely understand why given all that's happened to her but I wanted your take

no, youre 100% correct. it really goes to show how much Caitlyn loves Vi for even listening to her past that point. because, SERIOUSLY VI? being mad at Caitlyn for putting Jinx in prison, after 3 terrorist attacks she committed, in which she killed dozens of people, including the mother of the person you're talking to? forget Caitlyn apologizing to Vi, where's Vi's apology???

[loycos]

alrighty, after my previous analysis-es, I want to take a look at Vi and Caitlyn's interactions, specifically their dialog, throughout the show. precisely because it actually is very different than their touch language, in particular on Caitlyn's end.

I think no one would be surprised to learn that Vi is a very openly emotional person. Not only does she allow herself to be consumed by her feelings unabashedly

but she's also in touch enough with herself to effectively verbally communicate how she feels.

That last part throws a lot of people off- because Vi does have some walls she put up for proterction, in particular in front of strangers. I think her aggressive attitude and tendency to run away make people mistakenly assume she's a closed off person, but she most definitely isn't. People who are close to Vi get to see her be vulnerable- Caitlyn, Jinx, Ekko, Vander, and ever Loris. When Vi feels an emotion, she doesn't try to bury or hide it- she let's it come to the surface.

Cut to her Very emotionally repressed girlfriend, who not only buries her emotions on the regular, but also is completely clueless on how to voice them. when Caitlyn wants to express how she feels, she usually talks about the matter-of-fact, the dry details, to imply what she actually wants to say. that's why analyzing Caitlyn feels like decoding a cryptid message.

I think a lot of people miss this detail, because both Caitlyn and Vi are direct and honest people. the difference is, Vi is direct and honest through and through- whether the subject matter is casual or extremely sensetive to her. Caitlyn's directness comes in her matter of fact-ness. when it comes to subjects that are about her own emotions, she doesn't lie- but she often talks indirectly, or chooses to not speak at all.

and that's why Caitvi work so well- because Vi absolutely gets what Caitlyn is trying to say. she is a master at decoding Caitlyn's indirect backhanded language. and that's a big reason why Caitlyn feels so seen by Vi.

Just like ther touch language, the way each girl expresses herself verbally has direct ties to how they were raised.

Let's start by examining Caitlyn and her dad. Supposedly, according to the fandom, Cait's dad is the parent who gets her the most. well, maybe when the competition is Cassandra Kiramman, this isn't such a high praise. I'd argue neither one of Caitlyn's parents truly get her. In general, the Kirammans seem to not quite be able to communicate in a vulnerable way, despite clearly loving each other.

in this scene, Caitlyn is trying to express a very clear message to her dad.

translation: I feel guilty for Mother's death.

you'll notice she states a fact ("I had the shot") instead of openly expressing how she feels.

in return, her dad either 1. doesn't get that subtext from what she's saying, or 2. agrees with the subtext and decides not to challenge it. because I don't think Tobias is a bad parent, i'll go with the first option. But it still leaves Caitlyn feeling misunderstood, and her emotional needs unmet. it's not entirely Tobias' fault- he's grieving too, and his daughter isn't exactly spelling it out for him. But if anything, this scene shows you exactly how the Kirammans operate an emotionally raw situation- that is to say. they don't.

(Caitlyn also has no idea how to comfort her father)

compare this to the environment Vi grew up in.

Vi was always an open person- we see it in the way she openly grieves her parents in the very first scene in the show.

She was later raised by Vander, who himself was an honest man. Here's young Vi talking to her dad:

during their conversations, both Vi and Vander are communicating openly. Vi feels like she can be vulnerable around Vander, and he in turn takes her seriously, doesn't try to hide things from her just because they might hurt. that is the complete opposite to how Caitlyn was raised- she was protected, but also coddled. Vi expreienced the harsh reality growing up, but she had a mentor who was honest with her and gave her a place she could emotionally express herself. Caitlyn grew up being kept away from any pain or danger- away from the "real world"- but in return her mentors were much less emotionally available, and prioritized composure over vulnerabilty.

here's what happens when these 2 very different upbrinings clash.

Caitlyn is delivering one of her most vulnerable dialogs on screen, yet she keeps it to the facts; on the surface, she is talking about the literal vacuum her mother left, that she's now expected to fill- the legacy and responsibilty she enherited. however, the subtext here is Caitlyn trying to express the sadness, the loss and the grief she feels. Vi, who is used to open communication, sees through the first layer and addresses the subtext head on.

and so, Caitlyn feels seen, understood, despite never actually saying anything directly. Vi meets her at her own level, and Vi knows how to effectively comfort her.

most of Vi and Cait's scenes together are ruled by this dynamic seen above. Vi is the open one, leading most of their dialog. she will bring up things that hurt. she will say the quiet part out loud. she will confront the problem head on. on the other hand, Caitlyn is usually on the back foot of the dialog, replying rather than initiating. her words are short and indirect. more often than not, she stays silent.

let's look at some more examples.

im this scene, Vi, as usual, wears her heart on her sleeve. she expresses her biggest fear to Caitlyn- "everyone in my life has changed", and clearly communicates what she needs- "promise me you won't change". right before this scene, she apologizes to Caitlyn for her loss, relating to her pain- "I'm so sorry about your mother, I'm sorry I can't bring her back".

Caitlyn, uhh, well...

she starts the scene in her dry, militant way, and as Vi gets more emotional, she gets quieter and quieter. this gif is the last time she speaks in this scene, before her infamously cryptic "I won't". her words are unclear or sticking to facts, making her almost come across as cold. and the thing is, Caitlyn knows this. She knows her words don't offer comfort- and that's why, in this moment, she uses her touch to comfort Vi. because Caitlyn struggles when it comes to verbally expressing emotions, but her touch is always soft and warm.

here's another example.

Vi comes in this scene and just bombards Caitlyn with accusations. notice how she addresses all of her issues directly: Caitlyn being "ungrateful" to Jinx, her distrust in Caitlyn, her disappointment in Caitlyn's professional affair with Ambessa.

as for Caitlyn- she's on the back foot, as she often is when it's a dialog heavy Caitvi scene. notice how she doesn't state what she thinks directly, instead she's being the queen of passive aggressive sass.

what she says are the facts. You didn't let me in on the plan, you had Jinx there because of a contigency. the translation: "i'm hurt that you didn't trust me." but Caitlyn can't just admit that openly like Vi does.

The only time Caitlyn drops her defenses in this scene is when she admits her awareness of her wrongdoings.

"I know!"

this is the only direct admition we get, and it came cause Vi pushed her all the way against the wall and provoked her, which is something Vi is notoriously good at.

the second time she admits it is here, and she's back to her nondirect, vague language.

she's referncing a mysterious "collective", to avoid talking about herself directly... where else have I seen this?

translation: I can't erase my mistakes / i'm just like you. but Caitlyn doesn't make it personal. this phrasing makes the things she says, that are technically more subjective, sound grounded and objective.

Vi, of course, is as direct and personal as ever. and again it kind of looks like she answers Caitlyn's subtext rather than what she's saying on the surface, though this isn't as clear in this example.

Lets circle all the way back to this scene.

I think in the overall excitement of the fandom upon recieving this scene, plus the memeification that it went through, we all forgot that this is an objectively unromantic and strange thing to say. On the surface, it's a dry fact about a military operation. But after reading through this entire analysis, isnt this just the most Caitlyn line ever? And of course, the subtext here is abundant.

Translation: i knew you would go look for your sister, and I've decided to put my hate for her behind for you. I understand you will forever love your family and I'm not asking you to choose between us anymore. And more generally, I'm sorry and I love you, at the same time.

And the best thing? Vi gets it. Because she understands Caitlyn's indirect language more than anyone else.

So, in conclusion. Why all this matters? Well, truthfully, I'm just sick of the constant "Caitlyn didn't apologize" takes, that for some reason expected Caitlyn to sit down and directly say "I'm sorry" to the camera. I hope I explained why making this claim, or worse, trying to "fix it fic" is absurdly out of character. If youre a Caitlyn enjoyer, why erase her unique characterization for the sake of simplicity?

Not only is it out of character for Caitlyn, it's also out of character for Vi to ever demand that of her. Vi loves Caitlyn and underatands her cues. Just because an invisible audience needs things spelled out for them, doesn't mean the characters need it too. Vi gets what Caitlyn is saying regardless of whether she says it directly or not- that's part of the charm of their dynamic. That "imbalance" in how they express themselves isn't something that HAS to be solved- they clearly know how to work around it. And to me, that makes their relstionship feel more realistic and fleshed out.

Now that we addressed the fans- doesn't this also explain why so many people seem to get drastically different readings on Cait? Unlike Vi, whether you pick up on Caitlyn's subtext and body language or not, you'll get a whole different character. I suspect a lot of people who hate Caitlyn only read her at face value, based on what she says alone. By doing that, they get a much drier, angrier character than she actually is. and of course, Vi's devotion and attraction to her makes no sense if that's the only thing you see.

[loycos]

welcome back!! happy to read more of your fucking awesome caitlyn analysis i missed them! would love to hear your opinion on two things tho "You think I'm so daft I can't recognize a contingency? She wasn't there for my benefit, she was there in case I wouldn't follow through!"

- do you think vi's contingency plan was just to keep cait in the dark about jinx being there and she was up there armed and hidden as actually a backup so she could protect vander AND cait if something come up like it did or vi really put jinx there thinking if cait betrayed her jinx would just kill her? so many shippers genuine think that vi would be just fine with somethnig like that that she would come up with a plan like that bc the only thing that mattered to her then was jinx and vader so cait being killed to protect them is just something that she could live with but that doesn't feel like vi

- another thing i saw some shippers thinknig their relationship by the end of the show was sort of unequal because cait put vi first and vi had jinx ( and vander) and we don't really know if vi would stay if jinx asked her to leave with her and then she "died" so vi never had to really choose cait i don't know if they're entirily right but it can look like cait loves vi more bc there isn't anyone or even anything else more importnat than her and after they met again she always puts her first ( i do see some of that in every fanfic where cait's always fine with jinx back in her life )but i like to believe that vi would put cait first if needed i don't like the idea that vi is the most important person in cait's life and cait isn't for vi idk i don't think vi could stop loving cait more and more each day and even if there was some very small gap there vi would catch up very quickly!!

Hey! Thank you! I have another analysis coming soon, hope you'll enjoy it.

As for your questions:

-I think Vi used Jinx as a backup plan in case something goes wrong- and that something includes Caitlyn not following through with their plan. When Caitlyn brought this up to Vi in their argument, Vi didn't deny it- instead, she asked Caitlyn if she blamed her for not fully trusting her, which Caitlyn reluctantly agrees with.

Now, Do i think Vi instructed Jinx to murder Caitlyn in that case? Absolutely not. I dont know how people who are fans of Vi would ever suggest that- she couldn't bring herself to kill her sister when they were at their lowest point, and it's clear to me that after s1 episode 7, Caitlyn has joined Vi's little circle of "people she'd love forever", same category Jinx and Vander are in. She would never send harm in Caitlyn's way, and even if Caitlyn fully betrayed her, I dont think she'd ever stop loving her.

Another thing is that, if Vi suggested a plan to Jinx that involved an opportunity to kill Caitlyn, why would Jinx "not gonna like it"? I'd imagine she'd be pretty stoked. Vi's plan was probably closer to "keep an eye out for Cait", aka, protect her if needed. Now that's something Jinx would probably annoyingly grunt at.

i think Vi's plan was to keep Caitlyn unaware of Vi's mended relationship with Jinx until after this whole debacle went down. After all, Caitlyn has more than justified reasons to be furious about Vi warming up to Jinx again, and Vi needed her help. for their plan to work they needed to keep their distrust at bay.

-i discussed this before, as i think the show's decision to keep Vi's awareness of Jinx's status in the finale vague is not a good ending to her arc, as it robs her of her agency. Techinically speaking, she might already be aware of it, but we dont know. I choose to believe Caitlyn would share her findings with Vi, and Vi would stick by her side, for a couple of reasons:

Caitlyn cannot keep Vi in the dark when it comes to the trust between them. She often chooses to put honesty above all else, because she knows their relationship is fundementally based on transperacy and trust, and without it, it would crumble. we saw how she fumbled to confess her objectively unimportant fling with Maddie as soon as Vi made a move on her. It's important to Caitlyn that Vi has the full picture before she "commits" to her. And we know she made her peace with Vi potentially leaving her for Jinx- I don't see a reason she'd choose not to tell her.

Vi had the opportunity to run after Jinx and look for her after Caitlyn unlocked the cell, but she chose to stay with Cait- not only for their steamy jail sex scene but in the final episode. She chose to fight alongside Caitlyn and Piltover, and she's wearing the enforcer uniform too. Her last words on the show are "I'm the dirt under your nails, nothing will ever get me out"- i think it's the writers' attempt to confirm Vi sticking with Caitlyn from now on. She learned the hard way that Jinx is an unstable and fleeting presence in her life, and so chasing her leads no where.

For what it's worth, 2xko's shaky canon connections to Arcane imply Vi works as an enforcer with Caitlyn. Theyre already in a relationship so it has to be post Arcane, and while it could be an alternate universe (either that or Caitlyn grew her eyeball back somehow), there is a reference to the "oil and water" scene in the game. I wouldnt expect league lore to be too consistent but 1 thing that is consistent in every iteration of Vi is that she is by Caitlyn's side (and is a cop lmao dont tell the fandom that). So we can pretend like Caitlyn isnt the sheriff and Vi isnt an enforcer post Arcane cause it was never directly confirmed in the show. But also like. If they wanted to diverge from that they could've made 2xko's Vi not a cop. But they didn't, so i assume it's cause this core part of her character was never meant to be changed. Vi's natural state as a character is alongside Caitlyn, and same goes for Cait. Arcane's ending perfectly sets them up into their set characteristics, not challenge them.

[loycos]

My amazing digital circus theory is that theyre all AI, based on brain scans that were put into the system by putting a headset on in the old office of C&A. The real Pomni, Jax and co. are out there living their lives, having no idea that an AI that was trained on their brainscans exist somewhere on a computer. They moved on the moment they took the headset off. For the AI versions of them in the game, they have memories that are taken from real people from the real world, but they cannot physically exist in that world. What causes abstration is that realization of the AI that it is in fact not a real person, and therefore it does not exist outside of the circus- the circus is all there is for them. They physically can't leave the circus, and i suspect the ending will be about coming to terms with that and learning to make the most of their lives there- by being in a community that fulfills them.

[noicouldnevergiveyoupeace]

do yall ever wonder what you’re best known for in the fandom ?

[loycos]

Speaking of vulnerability and Caitlyn.

I glossed over it in my previous analysis, but there's so much more i want to say.

I think my limited explanation and examples make it seem like when i talk about "real" Caitlyn, i'm talking about Nice Caitlyn. and whenever she's Not Nice, it's a mask.

it's actually much more complicated than that. The question you should be asking yourself when watching any scene with Cait, is how emotionally open she is. if it seems like she's holding her honest emotions back, it's the mask, and if she isn't, she's exposing her "real self".

another thing to mention is that Caitlyn's real self also got layers to it (BARE WITH ME PLEASE). being 'open and honest' and being 'emotionally vulnerable' are 2 different things. real Caitlyn is genuinely empathetic to other people. many characters got to see that side of her, especially in S1.

her being a warm, empathetic, honest person doesn't stop her from also being emotionally repressed. basically, when it's about other people's emotions, she'll gladly listen and offer support. when it's about her own emotions, especially when they leave her feeling vulnerable- she bottles up. So while all of the above are also "true" Caitlyn, only Vi gets to really see Caitlyn fully- by choice, as Caitlyn only really lets herself open emotionally with Vi.

here's an interesing example

This is 'real' Caitlyn, though she's desperately trying to put the mask on. Vi's betrayal hit her so hard she can't seem to properly get back behind it for most of the scene. She's on the verge of tears, and she actually lets herself be vulnerable for a second- admitting her hope that Vi was "different". but like i stated before, Caitlyn doesn't like feeling exposed. the betrayal shattered her trust in Vi, and so she tries to wall herself off. by the end of the scene, she stops speaking altogether, keeps her back turned to Vi, and leaves before she breaks down in front of her. She doesn't let Vi see her cry anymore.

'Real' Caitlyn privledges revoked. the mask is back on, and Vi is denied any further access.

I think we can all agree that is the least nice Caitlyn has been in the series. but she's also entirely emotionally genuine here, even vulnerable, despite trying not to let it show.

it actually leads to an interesting reading on the last thing she tells Vi before their seperation. What does she mean when she says "I keep telling myself that youre different"? A common reading is "I thought you were different from your sister, but you're made from the same cloth"- which based on what she says immediately after ("it's her blood in your veins") is probably what the writers were going for. But let me offer you another interpertation.

when you consider Vi being the only person in Caitlyn's life who ever really saw Caitlyn for who she is, how she's the only person Caitlyn lets herself be herself around, this could mean "I thought you accept me for who i truly am, unlike everyone else in my life". Bare in mind, despite Caitlyn being all over the place in the first act, and in universe she's acting "out of character", Caitlyn herself doesn't see it that way. her emotions, as negative and toxic as they are, are honest and real. and isn't Vi the one place Caitlyn can be real in? yet, in a very short period of time, Vi questions Caitlyn's moral judgement, questions her aiming ability, and compares Caitlyn to someone who Caitlyn sees as a monster. the first 2 especially are very important to Caitlyn, as she prides herself for her sense of justice and her aim. Vi seems to not trust Caitlyn with those topics anymore. therefore, in Cait's eyes, Vi rejects "the real Caitlyn".

Caitlyn is so reeled by this rejection that she decides to zero in on the other version of her- just be who everyone expects her to be. Because what's the point of being herself if the only person who loved her for it rejected her? and so, her act 2 spiral began.

There are 2 other scenes i want to point out in which Caitlyn talking about her emotions, without actually being vulnerable.

Caitlyn talks to Jayce about seeing the body of her dead mother, and how it makes her feel-

only to immediately cut this off with talking about how much she fucking hates Jinx and wants her dead. she doesn't let herself sit in the vulnerability of the first admission, or let Jayce comfort her. she moves on so she can hide behind her anger.

while Caitlyn's anger is genuine, it is an emotion she defaults to so she doesn't have to be vulnerable. We saw it when she tried to hide behind it in the breakup scene in the sewers. It appears in several other scenes:

"I don't need charity, councilor. Yours or my parents" Caitlyn is hurt by Jayce babying her and siding with her parents on her career choice. Instead of expressing that she retaliates with cold aggression.

"I knew it was a mistake trusting you!" Is an accusatory way of saying "i trusted you and played me for a fool"

"You think I'm so daft I can't recognize a contingency? She wasn't there for my benefit, she was there in case I wouldn't follow through!" Is an accusatory way of saying "i trusted you and you kept me in the dark"

"a memorial... what type of.... ANIMALS" Caitlyn's clearly distraught by the attack, so she starts getting angry and aggressive to cover up how helpless she feels. (Vi clocks that immediately and Caitlyn soon breaks and lets herself be vulenrable for real)

"No good deed can undo our crimes!" Caitlyn is disappointed in her past mistakes, and she hides it behind her anger at Jinx again.

This last scene, however, does have Caitlyn offer a sliver of vulnerability.

techically Caitlyn's almost talking to herself here, seeing how unresponsive Jinx is for most of the scene. it's even framed like a confession booth. But regardless, it's probably the most vulnerable she's been with anyone other than Vi. with JINX of all people. crazy, but i guess thematically fitting. and of course, she immediately goes to leave afterwards, because the moment she lets her guard down for even a second she has to eject herself from the situation asap.

That's what i meant when i said that Caitlyn rarely lets herself be truly vulnerable. even all the way back in S1 she didn't let people who are close to her an access to that side of her, and that was before the trauma and grief made it worse. even with Vi, Caitlyn rarely expresses her vulnerability in words, and when she does, it's indirect or all over the place. Its clearly something she's not versed in.

[countcait]

Caitlyn feeling uniquely seen by Vi is one of my favorite aspects of the pairing. I sorely wish that we had gotten to see more of Caitlyn's childhood and explored her weird girl loneliness. I know the writers had a lot of exposition to cram into S1 but they kinda broke the "show don't tell" rule by having Caitlyn just say "I'm a misfit too" rather than showing us what her isolation looked like. That scene with Jayce did successfully show us that Cassandra lords over Caitlyn's social life and prioritizes appearances and social politics over Caitlyn's happiness in that regard, but I wish they'd gone much deeper into that. It'd provide a nice stark contrast to her experiences bonding with Vi.

I definitely agree that she keeps her mask up around Jayce. She's real with him in the sense that she can drop her politeness and joke around, but he doesn't recognize her grit and tries to coddle her like she's still a 15 year old. I don't think she trusts him to understand her inner self.

Caitlyn is only midly annoyed when Vi initially tries to demean her by treating her like a naive princess. I think she's used to that kind of treatment, especially on the job. But then the name "cupcake" changes from mocking to genuinely affectionate. Vi doesn't give a shit about appearances or politeness, and she recognizes Caitlyn's toughness and sees her like no one else.

How great would it be to be able to contrast that with a scene of Caitlyn being a sad little reject in her gilded cage as a child?

[loycos]

when you consider Caitlyn's lonliness and how she doesn't let herself open to anyone else in her life, her decisions in s1 and 2 make a lot more sense. People like to joke about Caitlyn being "down bad" for Vi after like 2 days of knowing her, about how she "folded" when she heard the word 'Cupcake', as if these are silly little quirks because Caitlyn is so Gay and Relatable. It removes a lot of depth from her character tbh. She's not some desperate horny lesbian, she's a lonely person who felt recognized for the first time in her life. In all the times she verbally opens up (i can only think of 3 times she does: rain scene, after the memorial attack, and the end of the show) she does 1 thing: ask Vi to stay with her. It means so much to her that's the only thing she's pushing herself to verbalize. Why does she want Vi to stay with her so bad? Because Vi sees her for herself. Caitlyn's life without Vi is shown to us in act 2 of season 2. She's miserable.

To be fair to the fandom, the show doesnt really allow us too much of an insight into Caitlyn's inner world, unlike it does for Vi and Jinx, or even Viktor. her perspective is always secondary to Vi's (and Jinx's) in the eyes of fans, since its never fully spelled out to us. It's also so interesting to me cause the way Caitlyn's emotions are *framed* is like how she treats them- hidden, shameful. I'm convinced it's a concious decision on the show's part, but it also creates a barrier between her and the audience- She's emotionally closed off to us as well, which makes her a lot less relatable to a lot of the fandom. hmm.. I can already feel another post brewing.