Eat, Sleep, Repeat

Lucas Cruz. Brazilian. Cali + Texas. I like funny shit, bboying, and music. Lets talk :D

[lucascruzz]

Here’s a little self reflection from this past year.

Its been around a year since i’ve been on my own, with no commitments to anyone but myself. I couldn’t be happier with the progress I’ve made. I’ve lost a lot of the weight that I gained, as well as picking up a couple new hobbies that I thought I would never do. I’ve made so many new friends as well as let go of old ones. Musically, the creativity has been off the charts. I can also say I’m financially stable for the first time in years. I’m living very comfortably, and I don’t have to answer to anyone but myself everyday. 

Mentally speaking, I can also say I’m happy. There are a lot of moments where I have a ridiculous amount of anxiety, but I have great friends I can always count on to help out. There are spurs of sadness here because I’d love to have a girl to come home too, but I truly am not in a hurry to find someone. I truly don’t have the time for that right now. My taste is so extremely picky to the point where it makes avoiding relationships a lot easier. Also, I’ve been finding out more and more that living alone while going to school, working, and maintain somewhat of a social life is ridiculously draining me out but I like being busy.

As far as it goes for you, I still see you on a regular basis lol, whether its just you walking out of class and I hide or just walking by and I “don’t see you” bc I’m on my phone. I don’t mind being around you, but Its low key conditioning my mind to still think about you on a very subtle level. I don’t think anyone condemns me anymore neither, which is great. Our chapter is closed for good. We’re happy, and that’s all I want. I think this will be my last time I post about us. It’s been a little harder than I originally thought getting over you because I do see your face a lot more often, but I’ve gotten used to it. 

My life has been great since I’ve been on my own. I really do mean that. The amount of love and positivity that I associate myself with has honestly helped me mature and grow in this past year more than any other year in my life. This past summer itself was an indication of the person I am today. Just pure bliss and happiness all around. 

[hellyeahthomassanders]

A Series of Interesting Duets

[lucascruzz]

It was like a breath of fresh air seeing you again. It definitely gave me the confirmation that I wanted. You seem a lot happier and lively compared to before and I’m glad things are working out for the better.

I’ve also learned that there’s always going to be a special place in my heart for you no matter how hard I try to conceal it. It’s not necessarily a bad thing neither. It’s indescribable too because I can’t help but smile whenever you’re happy. 

We finally got the happy ending to our story. Here’s to both of us finding even more success and happiness, because we both deserve it.  :)

[thegenialginger]

[hannahdoes-stuff]

PSA the ppl who do these vids are from Minnesota

[moandkatelive]

This is too ridiculous not to reblog.

1) the music 2) how does the person in there even see? 3) also skating over its own tail 4) how is NO ONE on the ice fazed by this at all? 5) skating over its own tail 6) also is it hot in there? 7) there is a freaking T-Rex on the ice- how is no one staring?

[characterlimit]

8) going so fast the head tips right back so it looks like it’s permanently screaming

[weloveshortvideos]

No strings attached.

[rabbitmyrabbit]

*pwing*

[redrodent]

This is my new favorite vine I can’t stop laughing aaaaah send help

[characterlimit]

[justlearningasigo-deactivated20]

“WOT THEE FOCK”

[windwaver]

[soulodreamin]

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[soulodreamin]

Repost to help with the upcoming semester 

[kthehermit]

poeticallybrown

[bando--grand-scamyon]

I will no longer need these after may. Passing them along to the next lil college shorty.

[lucascruzz]

What’s your worth??

I guess the past few days haven’t been the most normal of days. I find myself still questioning whether or not my decisions and actions are right or wrong. I really do try to do things with good intentions but its still not good enough for me. Its better than last month, but seeing you again made all the questioning pop up again. Its a given that I don’t wanna go back, but why does my mind keep wandering in the past? I’ve been watching old videos of us too again and its safe to say that I don’t like this path. It feels like my sense of self worth is dwindling again lol.

Good thing everything that happened today went the way it went. The last thing I need is my mind to experience another unnecessary bump in this road of life. Time to get myself out of this hole I dug myself into this week. I can’t go back to being that person. I’m worth a lot more than him, and I deserve more than what I got. Lets be like Dory and keep swimming

[setheverman]

i’m on to you drake

[kushandwizdom]

you can only give more when you find love in yourself.

Unknown (via kushandwizdom)

[lucascruzz]

What is going on???

I don’t know what’s going on, but i’ve been questioning a lot about my life. All this second guessing about my actions is something that’s slowly tearing my world apart. Especially at work, it just sucks. I’ve gotten a hang of snapping out of it whenever I think of you, but something still bothers me. I can’t put my finger on it, but the more I try to think about it, the more I stress out.

I think its just the fact that I lost the ability to be confident about the things I do. All my life, I always looked for other people’s approval of my actions. It made me the person I am today. It’s so hard changing a bad habit that’s embedded in the brain, but hey, I guess its something I have to do. Hopefully fixing this will also fix this annoying ass stress that I carry on my shoulders every day

[pastelq-tip]

I bet Luke sensed Rey was coming and made her walk up all of those stairs anyways so he could have his grand entrance scene on the cliff because he has been the drama queen of the galaxy since the day he was born

[theavengersfans-deactivated2018]

Pepperony.

[tonys-snark-blog]

[x]

[lucascruzz]

Here I Am

I can truly say that I’m still not over it. I’m still not over the fact that I still care about you more than I care about myself. I can’t be happy unless I know that you are too. I’m still not used to being on my own. Shit, I barely went a month alone before I started talking to someone else just like everyone told me. So now that I’ve found someone else, why am I not happy again? I was told the solution was to find someone else, yet I still wake up like everyday without you is another regret. I guess I have to take a different approach to getting over you. 

Now here I am, its been a solid 2 months since I’ve seen you still dwelling over the decision I made of letting you go when you were ready to try again. I thought doing me was the best thing I can do, and I honestly still stand firm with that. Why then? Why do you always run through my mind when I’m alone? Why do I keep thinking about you whenever I’m with someone else? Why doesn’t my mind just accept the fact that you weren’t the one for me? I keep telling myself to stop thinking about it but I keep latching on to the thoughts of whether or not my decision made you happy at the end of the day.

I’m finding out slowly that our relationship made my sense of self-worth seem almost non-existent and the damage is clearly seen in my personality. I can say with all seriousness that it’s been a while since I’ve been completely happy. It sucks that I can say that phrase and mean it. But with all that’s going on in my life, it’s hard to find time for happiness when all I think about is school, work, family, and you. I never thought that making myself vulnerable for someone would cause this much damage, but here I am.

I want to be happy again. I want an answer to kill this depression that’s slowly sinking me down everyday. How can I get rid of this natural instinct to latch on to you whenever things aren’t looking good? Why doesn’t my mind let this void be filled by someone else? I hope this year will give this personal healing I need to leave these fond memories of you in the past, and to lower this impenetrable wall I have up for others to enter my life

Here I come 2016.

[lucascruzz]

Theres nothing that pisses me off than people getting into business that isn’t theirs.

[kushandwizdom]

x

[yungbasedblogger]

teacher: why are you late?

me: