[fuck-customers]

Old white man in his fifties

So this is a fuck certain customers story. The other day I walked downstairs from the office to grab some paperwork and this women walks up to me and asks if I’m a manager. I tell her yes and ask what I can help her with, she starts with well I want you to know I don’t have to shop here. I really wanted to give her a list of the closest stores, but refrained. Then she says to me she doesn’t understand why I only have one register open, I don’t there are three but two are express. I tell her that and she says I have more than 15, which she probably had maybe 20, anyways I take her myself on a register and she continues yammering about how we are there to provide a service and so I said to her I am literally doing everything I can for you right now, to which she responds oh well you handled the situation the way you should, but she just kept bitching. A man came to my register and I assumed he just had a question so I said yes sir and he tells me he just needs cigarettes, at which point the women turns around and says HE will help you as soon as HE is done with me, no one will cut me. Now let me just go ahead and point out that I am a 23 year old lady with short hair and a button down shirt on, so before I can say I’m a she this man says SHE is finishing with you and SHE will help me when she’s done. I didn’t look at the lady the rest of the transaction which was about 10 seconds because I wanted to die laughing. Once she was gone that man proceeds to say fuck that women she needs to learn how to properly use her fucking pronouns. That man is the type of person I wish was always around to handle ignorant ass holes!

[fuck-customers]

I was folding a scarf display when some lady on her phone shoved it out of her way and tumbled all the piles of already perfectly folded scarves to the ground. It was 9pm, and I had already fixed so many things in the past seven hours that I just sagged like an abandoned marionette. Then here comes this new lady. Not even five foot tall and with pure white hair, all wrapped up in a fuchsia sweater . She helped me pick them all up and put them in a cart, then sort of patted me on the arm. I thanked her so many times. Then, this woman rummaged in her patch-work purse for a moment before depositing multiple small things in my hands. “Don’t worry,” she said with a bright smile full of sunlight. “It will get better.” And then she left. I looked down at my hands and saw about eight werthers original caramels. My day did get better, and I was in a great mood after that. I swear I met the guardian angel of retail workers.

[thoodleoo]

can we please have a version of drunk history except it’s called drunk mythology and people who know a lot about myths just get hammered and ramble about them with cartoony reenactments going on in the background? because i would totally go on tv and drunkenly kinkshame zeus

[tastefullyoffensive]

(photo via pallas-athena)

[succubustarhyme]

Tenno, current occupation: fish model

[hamsterobsessed]

Molly has a real butterfly on her head!

[graysonsdick]

[thisisnotmyfairytaleendingg-dea]

Fun Fact:

The fall was not scripted, Anne actually slipped while filming, although she started laughing they kept with the scene. The director didn’t yell cut because she waved her hand a little (what looked like when she waved at Lily to keep talking) to signal that she wanted to keep filming the shot. The editor eventually chose this shot because he felt it fit Mia’s character a lot more than the scripted shots they had.

[lesb1an]

how did she not start crying after getting cunt punted that hard.

[toujours-unreveur]

Loooooooool

[awesomevines]

[umbrizaphiriz]

THE A C C E N T OMG

[jagoandlitefoot]

[Three people with Irish accents, all overlapping each other: “Are they helium balloons?” “Oh for fuck’s sake!” “I told you, the car’s not built for helium balloons!” “Ah, fuck it…” “It’s too late!” “We’re flying away!”]

[therothwoman]

HOW

[dreaming-jaybird]

‘we’re flyin awea’

[petty-revenge-stories]

Dear Friends,

I will keep this short. I have a dog and she has issues with her health. I need your help. Please take a look at this page to see the details and see if you would like to help. Thank you for your time, new revenge stories are on the way.

[petty-revenge-stories]

When petty revenge turns into petty theft.

(warning: long story)

Sometimes petty revenge can go wrong. This happened about 11 years ago.

When I was 18, I got a job at a small, local hardware store. I was hired as a floor associate and cross-trained as a cashier. Most shifts, I worked the floor helping customers and stocking shelves, with a till upfront in case the cashier needed backup. A few months after I was hired, our store manager “Herb” hired “Liz”. She was a little younger than me, still in high school. Liz was attractive and personable, the male customers (and employees) really liked her. She was also a snarky, two-faced b*tch.

Keep reading

[fuck-customers]

When I worked at Barnes & Noble the computer monitors at the customer service desk were 10 years old and completely fucked up, like blurry colors, random lines, and glitches caused by a loose cable connector. It wasn’t the cable though - it was the connector embedded in the actual monitor. Our manager tried to have them replaced, but the district manager wouldn’t authorize it, just kept ordering new cables. So we used packing tape to hold the cables in place and just put up with it.

You wouldn’t believe how many customers would lean wayyyyy over the counter to try to see what was on our screens, and then, when they couldn’t, grab the corner of the monitor and try to spin it toward them. Usually it was just totally annoying and against store policy.

But with the two MacGuyver monitors, every time a customer did that the cable would guaranteed get disconnected and the screen would go black. Every. Damn. Time.

And not only would someone have to untape the whole thing and stick it back in and tape it up again at the precarious angle that made it stick - while person A was doing that, person B would inevitably have to deal with the impatient customer who couldn’t wait for the damage they’d done to be fixed, and need to take over ANOTHER spot at the desk while person B repeats their entire order on a new machine.

Fuck customers and fuck stingy district managers too.

[fuck-customers]

How dumb do you think we are?

I’m the night manager at a craft store with a man’s name. We sell arts and crafts supplies and the occasional kitschy retro item. Including those pocket-sized Polaroid cameras.

I had a customer come in and try to get a $119 camera for $19 because someone put the display box on the wrong place.

She was yelling at one of the floor girls until she had to call me for help. I told her that the box had been misplaced and that the camera costs $119 but she can easily use one of our 40% off coupons on it.

And THEN she claimed she had “a degree in contracts” and that by putting the box there (which we didn’t, it was another customer, we’re not fucking stupid) we were “forming a contract with her” to sell it at that price. BULL FUCKING SHIT.

First off you’re lying through your teeth ok? If you really had a degree in contracts you would be making so much fucking money that wouldn’t be trying to bully us into giving you a 90% discount.

Secondly we are under ZERO obligation to honor the price if it was misplaced by another customer.

Thirdly you brought my floor associate nearly to tears by yelling at her so you need to leave.

I told her there is absolutely no way that I can discount it 90% for her, and that we are not responsible for honoring a price based on a mistake. I then pointed out that the sign above that tag VERY CLEARLY states that that price ($19) is for the CASE, not the CAMERA. (You have a degree in contracts but you can’t read fine print?)

Her husband and children looked positively horrified by her behavior.

I handed her a card with the corporate number on it and told her if she continued making a scene and harassing my associates that I would have her forcibly removed from the store.

[alicenthightower]

I grew up on a very tiny island in Hawaii, and I lived in one of two houses near this commercial harbor that had an insane amount of stray cats (I’m talking dozens). My grandmother and I used to hike down every day and feed them, and sometimes we were able to adopt one (we had ~7 cats at any time). She died when I was 11, and we moved to a different island, and I’d kind of forgotten about this daily ritual…

But today I found out that shortly after we moved, they opened up the Lanai Cat Sanctuary right by my house, and man did it make me cry to think about how happy my grandma would have been to see this:

[pr1nceshawn]

Famous Disney Characters As Ethnically Correct Humans by Pugletto.

[laysiaprincess]

I love this

[summerashes]

Omg

[dominicsavaglio]

[placesleftbehind]

[gifsboom]