Lullola @lunalulola - Tumblr Blog

A Bullet Through The Head

AUTHOR'S ENTRY: Welcome, dear readers! I have finally returned HAHA. I understand this fanfic is overdue BUT, in my defense, this was hard to revise AND continue. I will be posting this first part because the fanfic is nearly 20K words total. This first half has been finished since early December 2025, I was just hoping I could finish the second half by January. Alas, I underestimated how difficult it would be to build off scenes from other established authors, who are far more superior in their writing than I am. I must also note that the smut scenes were EXTREMELY difficult to write because a lot of the kinks in this fanfic, especially the threesome plot, are kinks I have yet to experiment on with my partner. In particular, I had to do a lot of cross referencing and research to help my description of the scenes so that the smut scene was perceived as enjoyable than merely sensual. This fanfic is heavily inspired by the plot of @borathae's Cold Gun plot and a reimagination of @explicit-tae's Ain’t No Fun. Please give these authors their well-deserved flowers for the masterpieces they write and publish regularly. Considering the difficulty I am experiencing as a new writer, the fact that these three authors have created a space for themselves in the fanfic community is a feat I praise even more now. With that said, I hope you enjoy part one and remain patient for part two. I will be publishing part two shortly after this. Thank you!

Nowwww, please sit back and enjoy! - Lula💜

PS. Will add a header image later, I am having some difficulty putting the one I’d like together lol.

Time Started: July 05, 2025 (When I started writing the draft)

Time Finished: March 2026

Date Published: March 04, 2026

Estimated Word Count: 20K words

Plot: Hoseok x Reader (Female) x Namjoon

DISCLAIMER: Every scene in this work is a form of fiction, and ONLY RESERVED FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES. I do not, in anyway shape or form, sexualize the BTS members (or any idol) outside the fictional context. I will also not tolerate any form of sexualization of the members and other idols done outside of the fictional context. This specific work is NSFW and RESERVED FOR AUDIENCES ABOVE THE AGE OF 18. MINORS DO NOT INTERACT (The "mature" function is attached for a reason.) Kindly keep any negative thoughts about kinks to yourself, no kink-shaming here!

WARNINGS: Angst, Porn with plot, HEAVY BDSM Themes, Dom/Sub dynamic, Arranged Marriage au, mafialeader!Hoseok, mafialeader!Namjoon, chaebol!Reader, dom/switch!Hoseok, sadist!Hoseok, dom/switch!Namjoon, rough/softdom!Namjoon, sub!reader, (slightly)masochist!reader, threesome - MMF, NamjoonxHoseok, HoseokxReader, NamjoonxReader, NamjoonxReaderxHoseok, Sexism/Misogyny, Implied discrimination of LGBTQIA+, Mentions of violence and guns, Mentions of safewords and safety signals, Subspace episodes and implications, Aftercare (huge scene) Open ending(?) (but a happy ending)

List of Kinks Involved:

Master kink, Cuckholding, Gagging, Sex devices, Gun play (idk if this counts tho), Slight knife play (used @mrsvante's Kinktober Jhope fanfic as a reference), Humiliation, Degradation, Name-calling (slut, whore, etc), Toys, Hair pulling, Choking, Manhandling, Cock-sucking, Whipping/Slapping, Dacryphillia, Biting, Aftercare is hot af

I'm sure yall get it now, very BDSM-based and raunchy, but that's what the aftercare is for! But yes, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

A BULLET THROUGH THE HEAD: PART ONE

You inhale and exhale shaky breaths as you keep your eyes closed. You flinch and bite your lips to stop a hiss from coming out. I apologize, Madam., the nurse says with an apologetic expression as he places the blood-soaked cotton ball on the metal tray.. He picks up a mirror from the medical cart and hands it over to you, I hope you are alright with this, Mrs. Kim-Jung. I did my best to assure that the wound will not leave a dark scar. You give the nurse a gentle smile as you take the mirror from his sweaty palms. You raise the mirror to see the damage done by the bullet that grazed your cheek, the door swings open with a loud bang and your husbands walk into the clinic. Namjoon’s eyes land on you and the fury is present and alive. Behind him, your other husband, Hoseok, has on a stern face that was less ferocious than that of his brother. When Namjoon eyes you, he is already taking long strides to confront you. Hoseok sees where this might go so he quickly follows his brother to put out any fire that might arise. The nurse scurries away when Namjoon is standing right in front of you. He was seething, and you were definitely fucked. Before he could act, Hoseok placed a hand on his chest and said, Calm yourself, Joon. The least we can do is allow her to explain. Namjoon looked over at Hoseok and let out an exasperated breath. When he turned to you, you kept your head down, fearing what anger lingered in their gazes. A hand grabbed your chin firmly, though not roughly, to make you face them. Namjoon glared and turned your face over to the side so your bandaged cheek would face them. Does it hurt? What did the medic say?, Namjoon growled out. You gulped down a shaky breath to say, It won’t scar. It’s n-nothing, at that Hoseok scoffs. Good, Namjoon stated coldly before letting your chin go.

Mind explaining how the fuck we ended up nearly losing half of our empire to our rivals? Why the fuck were you even seen with Kai?, your taller husband interrogates with a venomous look that could kill. Or were you, in fact, conniving with them this whole damn time?!, his voice raises and you could clearly see his blood was boiling. You catch him putting his hand behind him, which meant he was grabbing his gun. As you trembled for what could come next, Hoseok steps in for you. Joon. Enough with the accusations. It was said with Hoseok holding onto your other husband's hand to prevent him from even grabbing the weapon. At that, Namjoon swallows his fury and puts both his hands into his pockets, preferring Hoseok to take the lead for this. Hoseok nods and faces you, his face no less cold than Namjoon's but at least his head is in the right place.. for now. Why were you seen with Kai last Tuesday?, there was accusation underneath his tone, but you had to hold yourself high. You would never betray them, no matter how loveless this arrangement may be. You swallowed the lump in your throat before sitting up straight. I was trying to gain intel on what they were planning. I made him believe I was giving him your strategies to set us a few steps ahead of them. (you hear Namjoon scoff at that) But, that clearly did not work out too well. Hoseok chuckles, Damn right it didn't. What the fuck were you even thinking acting on your own like that. We had everything under control! He was scolding you. You felt like a little child receiving a lecture for lying. What were you thinking that time? Perhaps because she believes she can do something in this arrangement. The only purpose of her presence here is for an alliance, nothing else. Namjoon bluntly states, and it stings. Maybe because it was slightly true. Your eyes tear up from the sting as you reminisce why exactly you were here.

Your family's business was falling apart when your older brother found out about the Jung-Kim brother's search for a wife. The business was responsible for the construction of nearly half of the trade routes of the northern regions, the exact regions the brothers needed to oust their rivals. From the outside, the business was doing well, expanding the trade routes farther. However, internally, it was the opposite. Your uncle, the company's COO, brother of the company founder, AKA your father, had embezzled nearly 50 billion KRW. This made your company's budget plans plummet, nearly destroying the stocks and scaring away investors. Your brother, who was the current CEO, was nearly desperate and would have gone bankrupt if it wasn't for your husbands. The offer was simple, they needed an alliance that would help them conquer the north, and your family needed a way to salvage the damages done by your uncle. When your brother proposed to have you marry into their family in exchange of them funding the business and gaining reigns over the trade routes, they were more than amenable. Part of the agreement was that you had to be accustomed to their lifestyle, which was difficult but nothing you were not made aware of prior. Another part of the agreement was that you would be provided for thoroughly and included in matters concerning your family's business and theirs. While they agreed to the former, they refused to allow you involvement in their affairs. Well, obviously, they could not just let you into their business simply since you were their wife, you had to have some sort of experience first. Aside from this, there was no mishap in the arrangement that repulsed you. If anything, you were never too fond of your family for their disdain towards gender equality. At least with your husbands, they were willing to acknowledge your efforts in business. They had no need for children, at least not yet and you were amenable to that as well. Sex was not even required of you. If anything this arrangement was a win-win for your family and or the brothers.

That is to say, there were certainly marriage troubles. You were usually alone in the mansion. Though you did not mind the solitude, it bothered you to know you and your husbands would never really be involved in each other’s lives aside from business. Though you gradually grew familiar with the sounds of gunshots and sight of blood, the first few incidents rocked your very core. Upon the first month of your marriage, commotion struck you out of slumber when you heard the agonizing groans and shouts of Namjoon. When you rushed to the living room, the scene horrified you. Namjoon had a towel stuffed into his mouth to muffle his screams (futile though) with several of his men holding him down as the medic pried at his gunshot wound. Hoseok was pacing, blood smeared all over his hands and forearms. Some even splattered on his face as he grimaced at his brother’s suffering. The wound was raw and bloody, located on Namjoon’s right shoulder. The sight of it all made your blood boil at the same time as drain from your body. Hoseok caught a glimpse of your figure that was frozen in fear. He moved swiftly and quickly to your side causing you to flinch. Whatever words he was saying faded into nothingness that day as you slowly lost consciousness. By the time you woke up, your husbands had no blood in sight and Hoseok simply told you to “get used to this”. And you did, you slowly made yourself immune to the mafia world, - you were only there for business. And it had been like that for four years now. Now, I know what yall are thinking.. “What about sexy times??” When it came to sex, both brothers relieved themselves in a way where they would not need you nor rely on you. Though they permitted you the same privilege, you never did. You were no virgin, but also not a whore, especially while married. The thing about the chaebol world is that people love a scandal, and you being entangled with someone other than your husbands would definitely lead to that. Do not jump to conclusions, your husbands did not go hoeing around with other women. For some reason, at least for you, they never seemed interested in finding other women to relieve them.. just as much as they didn’t find you for such relief. Did you know how they relieved themselves? No. Do you have theories? Yeah. Either way, if in your family, your role was often diminished, with your husbands, it was near forgotten. They only ever struck conversation with you about your family’s business and what you could do, but there wasn’t much of anything else. However, there were small times, tiny moments, that made your heart race around them. These moments would leave you questioning your own feelings and doubting their intentions.

==========

Flashback

Three years ago, you climbed the kitchen counter to grab some seasonings from the uppermost shelf. You lost your footing and nearly slipped off and hit the hard-marble floors, you should have ended up with a broken arm or twisted knee. Instead, Hoseok had caught you. When he put you down, the terrifying mask your mafia husband wears regularly had dissolved into an expression of care and worry. Why would you even do this to yourself, baby?, Hoseok asked you, but all you could focus on was the tone of his voice and the title he gave you. None of your husbands had ever spoken to you with such concern and kindness until that point in your marriage. You were stuck on the high of it that Hoseok had to force you back into reality. Y/N! Are you even listening to me?, he asked with a more stern tone. While you flinched at that, you still saw the same soft expression on his face. Oh, how you wish that moment never ended.. But, it had to. That was your first ever “soft” encounter you shared with your husbands by that point. That event also made you grow more familiar with Hoseok over time, even though the softness you experienced that day rarely (or never) returned.

Two years ago, on the other hand, you experienced similar with Namjoon, just a little bit more odd than the encounter with Hoseok. You stupidly got caught in a crossfire, out in public. It was Thursday and you walked into your favorite flower shop to purchase a bouquet of orchids like you always do on Thursdays. What you didn’t know, however, was that your husband’s enemies had intercepted your arrival. They ambushed the shop, held you hostage. Luckily, before they could take you in to exchange you for ransom, Namjoon had tracked your location the minute he received intel that their rivals were following you. Shots fired, blood splattered, glass windows broken, it was utter chaos once your husband arrived. But, the goal was to get you and keep you safe. You kept your head ducked down and crawled away from where the enemy was standing, until he grabbed your ankle. Your sharp shrill reverberated throughout the chaos as you were dragged back. The motion made the glass shards scrape against your arms with you flailing them to grab onto anything. You’re coming with me, you fucking bitch!, the enemy growled out as he pinned you onto the ground. You kicked and screamed, but you felt that your husband would not hear you from all the noise. You were, however, proven wrong when the enemy was suddenly stunned into silence by a bullet through the headl. You scream as his limp body landed right on top of you. You were gasping for air amid your shrieks, sobs building up when Namjoon appear in your vision. Are you alright?!, your husband asked in a yell. You hyperventilated from everything that just unfolded (and still unfolding). Sobs were ready to erupt when Namjoon sweeps you into his arms. He has never once held you, not even touched you, and yet, here he was. His arms wrap around your trembling frame as he looked at your nerve-wrecked expression. His face screamed worry and pity as his eyes cascaded your body. Y/N, focus on me. I’m right here., he nudged you, and it was enough to push the tears pooling in your eyes. Namjoon held you as you cried, and, next thing you know, he picks you up bridal style and rushes you out the shop. Through the chaos of yelling and gunshots, your husband was swift in his maneuvers to shield you from further harm. Once you were in the safety of the armored car, your husband wrapped his coat around you, his voice fading slowly as you lost consciousness from the harsh events you just endured. When you woke up (as usual, to an empty bed), two red roses, each having a hand-written note, from both of your husbands lay on the bedside table:

Get well soon, baby.

Hoseok

I’m sorry, dear.

Namjoon

=========

Present

Ever since, you have craved for said softness and concern to return from your husbands. However, your patience has proven futile, especially in your current position. Perhaps because she believes she can do something in this arrangement. The only purpose of her presence here is for an alliance, nothing else, Namjoon’s words echo. Hoseok begins to retort when you already say, I’m sorry. Both men look in your direction as you begin to speak up, I’m sorry that I compromised your plans. I should have never tried to enter your lives like that. The brothers are seething, their faces unreadable. I would never betray you both, never in my life even if you took it right now. (The silence that follows from that statement is eerie but you keep your eyes straight ahead so as to avoid your husbands’ gaze) I am sorry again. You’re right, I’m only here for our alliance and nothing else, husbands. The tone of your voice was neutral but that last part was so sharp, it cut the silence. Before any of your husbands could say anything about your words, you slip off the clinic bed and walk out, rushing to your bedroom. You hear the door behind you creak open and close and Hoseok yells, Y/N, wait!. But, you have already shut your bedroom door. You slide down the doorframe as the tremors of your anxiety hit you. I am such an idiot, the thought repeats in your head and tears begin to fill your vision. What had you done to deserve this? Was a family unwilling to acknowledge that their daughter was important beyond marriage not enough? Now, you had two husbands who never see you as their wife, but merely a benefactor and bargain. Did you love your husbands? No (or at least, that is what you prefer to think), but you did wish your husbands would allow you the comfort of connection. You don’t even need them to hold you if they do not wish, - all you desire is more kindness from them. Though really, what were you expecting? These men are born and raised in a world where kindness is weakness. Perhaps, that explains your decision to carry a sub-mission by yourself, - you wanted them to welcome you into their world to feel more connected to them. Well, guess you just aren’t fit to be their wife at all. The thought makes you drag your feet towards your bed, and you fall into the sheets for slumber.

~~~~~~~

Time Lapse

Your eyes open up to near-complete darkness. You turn over to the large-span window and see that the day has faded into night, your only source of light being the busy city across your home. As you push yourself off the bed, you search for your phone for the time. 8:23 PM your phone screen presents. Wow, I must have been exhausted.. Who wouldn’t be? You were nearly ambushed when you went to what you thought would be a trap for your husbands’ rivals. Unfortunately, the trap had been for you, and you would have never gotten out of it alive if your husbands had not discovered your stupid plan and intercepted events soon enough. You pick your legs off the bed and stretch your arms as you stand. You turn on the lamps and mood lights to contrast the darkness that engulfed the space. The lights make your full length mirror more apparent to you, and you see your reflection. Your eyes land on your bandaged cheek and the image of the events that lead to the injury make you wince. Thus, you strip yourself of all your clothes and walk straight into your shower. When you see yourself more closely in your bathroom mirror though, you find that the wounds from your futile escape earlier has left bruises and marks of red and purple. Damn, I didn’t know they did so much damage.., you think to yourself before you turn away and slide your glass shower door open. Once the warm water hits your skin, it stings the scars and wounds , making you change the temperature to the cool setting. As the water runs, your mind thinks everything over again.

For the years you have spent on this earth, you have always felt so isolated. As a young girl, your only circle were other chaebol sons and daughters, none of which ever stuck around to enjoy an actual childhood. You were homeschooled, bred into learning etiquette to a T and providing business bargains for your future husband and family. You and your brother were raised very differently - there was almost no presence of sibling love there, rare were the times you and him actually spoke outside of business and family. When the time came that you turned 20, you were at marriageable age. Every date set up for you to find a husband failed as your parents never really liked the candidates, none of them were wealthy enough for their daughter, - more like, for their business. When the scandal about your uncle and the business’ closeness to bankruptcy came to light, candidates for your hand slimmed down. This event gave you a small window of freedom, - a window where your role was more than just a chaebol lady ready for marriage. It remained a lonely life, but at least you could actually step out of your confinement. You painted, danced, even escaped your bodyguards. For about a year, you weren’t imprisoned in a life planned out for you, - you could actually live for yourself for once. Sadly, duty remained a prominent demand for you, and that came in the form of your husbands. They were in search of a wife to add to their alliances as they knew the presence of a woman would present as much gain as risk. They needed a wife from connections that they would value for a lifetime, a wife who can give them exactly what they need to expand. And that wife was you. You had always heard about Jung-Kim Corporate, and you also knew they were one of the country’s most feared mafia. Of course, only the elite knew about them being mafias, and nobody dared to ever expose them to the masses… The last one who tried was never seen again, nor was his wife and two kids. You were bred for a life of riches and luxury, but not gore or blood. But then… knowing the fate they could subject you to, you preferred (at the time) to just serve your purpose to them and your family. You did not hesitate to escape the prison of your own life, only to wind up in a new, more dangerous cage. You finish scrubbing your body and reach for your towel when you begin to think back on the days leading up to your wedding.

==========

Flashback

As your maid finishes your hair, you let out a shaky exhale. You have always heard about the dangerous Jung-Kim brothers. Nobody knows how they became brothers to begin with. Was it a simple business title? Were they, perhaps, step-brothers or half-brothers? Some have even speculated that it was a way of hiding the fact they may be intimately involved with one another. Either way, you weren’t there to ask questions, you were there to marry and serve your purpose. Your butler walks into your room to announce, Madam, the brothers are here for you now. You give him a small nod and your maid steps back to pull your chair out. As you walk towards the staircase to head down into the living room where you will be presented to your soon-to-be-husbands. You shudder quietly as you begin to think about what kind of husbands these brothers might be. You knew only one of them were the biological but illegitimate son of Kim Sa-eon, one of the largest business sharks in East Asia, and the other had been adopted from one of his greatest allies after their death. You also knew that they both inherited his legacy of being a business shark and mafia leader. You do not really recall ever hearing much else about these men other than their victories (in both worlds). Well, at least my duty to this family is done, you think to yourself once you reach the bottom of the stairs.

You keep your eyes down to avoid eye contact with your family that is ready to sell you off into the arms of the richest yet most dangerous men in all of South Korea. It doesn’t really matter what the brothers have in store for you - marriage is what you were trained for. That doesn’t erase the fear of what you could face in the hands of these two men. Your thoughts are interrupted by your brother’s arrogance. There’s the princess! Took you long enough. (your brother doesn’t make his sarcasm anywhere near undetectable) Quite rude to make your husbands wait so long - scoffs-. You want to retort.. but that won’t save you from your fate. That’s enough, Jungkook, your mother scolds. She turns to address you now, Y/N, come now, meet Jung Hoseok and Kim Namjoon. Your head still down, you slowly inhale before you exhale while lifting your head. You see one tall man, perhaps slightly over six feet, with buff arms and a broad chest. His chiseled jawline accentuated his sharp face structure alongside his unreadable but stoic demeanor. The suit hugged whatever needed to be hugged perfectly, certainly did his physique justice. Meanwhile, the other man of slightly smaller stature is no less sharp and put-together. However, his heart shaped lips create a softer aura in spite of his odd reaction to seeing your face. His body was certainly as glorious as the other’s, his waist being snatched and legs and torso lean while dressed in a crisp white button-up sort of untucked from his smooth suit pants. His blazer hangs loosely over his shoulders, as if that made him look like a chill guy. Good evening, Sirs. My name is Jeon Y/N, you greet with a low bow. You can’t help but think about how attractive these men were, - they were a dream if you’ve ever read fiction. Both men acknowledge you with a curt nod, the shorter speaking up, My name is Jung Hoseok, and this -points to the taller- is Kim Namjoon. You honor the man’s introduction with a polite smile and tight nod. You catch a glimpse of Jungkook’s facial expression behind Namjoon, his brows rising to signal you. Releasing a sigh, you suggest to the brothers, Would either of you like to accompany me to a more private location? Perhaps so you may personally discuss your concerns with me. Your father enthusiastically chimes in, Oh a splendid idea, shall we have the study readied for your comfort, Mr. Jung and Mr. Kim?

Now in the study, you sit on the chaise lounge chair with your ankles crossed , your butler by the corner assigned to chaperone you. Both brothers are sitting across you on the chaise sofa, each man taking up space in their own way. It had been over five minutes of silence before a stoic, resigned voice breaks it. Ms. Jeon, I am sure your parents and brother have briefed you on the terms and conditions my brother and I have required of you, correct? (You nod) Good. Then we will simply sum it up for you, just to ensure you are on board with what we require of you. -signals to Hoseok-. Hoseok opens his cellphone, In summery, Ms. Jeon Y/N will be married into the Jung-Kim corporation in exchange for financial security and company funding for Jeon Corp’s trade routes and collaboration -Hoseok glances up at you before proceeding- You, Jeon Y/N, are required to attend every meeting and transaction required as representative of your family and business. In exchange, we, Kim Namjoon and Jung Hoseok, are tasked with providing you food, clothing, and shelter of the best kind, along with a 25 million KRW monthly allowance from each brother, amounting to 50 million KRW per month. With said money, you are entitled to spending, saving, and investing with it as you please, with the exception that any business related finance concerns shall be discussed with us and resolution is conjugal. You are in no way required to provide me or my brother emotional, psychological, or sexual relief, in so far as neither party initiates. Though children are currently unprecedented, should the need arise, both we as your husbands and you as our wife are entitled to proper communication and we shall provide you with proper care and security in the event of pregnancy and birth. DIscussions on this shall proceed further at another time. All the conditions, despite their simplified description, felt dehumanizing. Wow, I really am property exchange, you thought to yourself. Perhaps, maybe, the arrangement looked ideal.. But that was the problem, the arrangement was perfect. Call it rich people problems, but that doesn’t dismiss what this arrangement was, - the perfect bargain. A wife with connections, husbands with wealth stretching generations, nothing less and nothing more. You were cut off from your thoughts by Namjoon’s harsh tone. Ms. Jeon, answer my brother. Are you amenable to all the conditions?

You suck in a breath you involuntarily held in and replied curtly, I agree with all the conditions. Did you really? Your nervousness and unease were hopeful subtle, - a hope crushed with a single question. Ms. Y/N, are you absolutely certain? If you have any clarifications or objections, speak now. The question came from Hoseok, it was a resigned tone yet rather gentle. It somehow gave you more confidence to ask, What about my liberties?. It was a question that came out sour and naive, as if revealing your fears, fury, and frustration towards this arrangement. The brothers look at each other, words spoken through the eyes and whatever telepathic connection these two may have. Namjoon sighs, not dramatically, but it was enough to make you worry if you’ve upset them. We only require you to live with us, under our roof, and follow protocols for your safety. -he looks over at you- Whatever you wish to do in your free time, we shall not meddle with.Your allowance also isn’t limited to the amount we have assigned; should you need or want more, simply ask from either of us, Namjoon had answered, his voice reserved but docile.And if you are concerned with the need for children, we will not force you until such time you are ready. We will require an heir eventually, but we won’t require you to say yes when sex is demanded. You will still need to fulfill your role to carry an heir, but you will get a say as to when., Hoseok states. AN: As if there aren’t any misogynistic notes in that. Nevertheless, you find comfort in the very tight and miniscule control you will have once this arrangement is settled. What could possibly go wrong?

~~~~~~~

Time Lapse

A week after the first meeting, your family was busy preparing for the wedding. It will take place a month from now, Jungkook announced last week. The whole house was in panic now. Your mother rushed to the best designers for the wedding dress, your father negotiating the menu and catering, your brother caught up with the brothers, and you are, as usual, left by yourself. All you had to do was sit still, look pretty. You come in from the garden, your maid rushing to prepare a bath for you seeing you state. You loved gardening, a hobby nobody in your family found interesting enough. Your mother would make backhanded comments about how your ability to tend to plants should reflect your ability to care for your future children. Oftentimes, your brother talks down on the hobby as a ‘chore for servants’. How typical of your family; whatever reflected small joys was renounced to be irrelevant. That was just the life of a chaebol family, especially one so desperate to remain a chaebol family. While you wait to be called for a bath, you take yourself to the kitchen through the back entrance. As you wash away the residual dirt left from gardening, you hear the hushed conversation your brother is having with.. The brothers? You dry your hands and step quietly towards the entrance through the dining area and there they are, your brother speaking with Kim Namjoon and Jung Hoseok. Were they supposed to come over today? Why didn’t anyone tell me?, you overthink. Your visit is definitely unexpected, Mr. Jung. Had we known, we would have prepped your bride for you!, Jungkook chortles. An unexpected visit? Oh god, I need to get changed immediately. You panic and gasp as you rush to leave the kitchen.. until your curiosity takes over. But why are they here today? Why show up randomly?? You eavesdrop even more into the conversation, only to hear your brother say, My sister is quite a brat, honestly. I certainly.. care for the thing, however, she is an oddball. Okay, fuck you, Jeon Jungkook, you cuss in your head. I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t even want to see her right this instant, she is probably gardening. She looks like a witch when she does. Your brother’s words shouldn’t hurt you, he says these to your face frequently. However, the mere audacity he has to say these about you to your future husbands sort of reflects how he has always seen you, an object. God, the misogyny here… What does surprise you, however, is your husband’s response. Whatever oddities you see, whatever flaws she has, we agreed to take her and care for her for a bargain. If her ‘witchiness’ bothers you so, we are more than happy to take her sooner than later., Namjoon’s tone is dull of life - rather than reserved sharpness, there is subtle distaste. If anything, our garden needs tending to. The gardener we had last time resigned and we haven’t been satisfied with the gardening services of other gardeners, Hoseok explains, but your mind remains stuck on the fact that both brothers were willing to marry into your ‘peculiarities’. They did not see your hobby as a burden, it won’t make them hesitate. Your heart thumps against your ribs, a small grin twitches on your lips, your mind went from overthinking to going blank.

~~~~~~~

A week before the wedding

You are called on by your mother, her voice frantic and demeanor disarray. Once you enter the drawing room, she notes your presence. You called, Mother?, you ask as you walk over to her. She pats the space beside her to signal that you sit. Y/N, I understand how uncommon this is for you and I.., your mother starts. She stares at you, into you, before offering a small smile - a smile that you have never seen her present. Listen to me very closely, child. -she takes your hand into her slightly shaky ones- I want you to know that, while this arrangement is rather.. fixed. But, I want you to know, my dear, that this arrangement is as safe and secure as we could make it so for you. You process her words, yet your expressions remain morose and blue. She sees this and immediately states, We.. I have not been the kindest to you. Our family depends on these arrangements -she chuckles, it makes your heart race slightly- But, we arranged this in a way that you remain secured and protected. You feel the pressure weigh on you, and before you know it, What protection have you given me if you’ve just thrown me into the lion’s den? It was not meant to come out so harshly, nor so brutally, however your mother noted it immediately. You felt like you needed to prepare yourself for her anger, that she may belittle you or hit you. Instead, she surprises you… with her tears. You look up at her and witness her cry silently, as if her emotions have finally cracked through the surface. She closes her eyes and releases a shaky sigh, then she nods. I deserve this attitude from you. I am quite shocked it is just now you spoke to me so harshly -she looks at you- I thought you’d crack before or rebel or run away. And if you did I- (she pauses and gulps) I thought you’d end us. The silence between you both encompassed the entirety of the room. You could practically hear her heart thump against her ribs.. Or perhaps that was your own. You close your eyes, as if everything slowed down, you breathe in. The sound of your sigh seemed to run chills down your mother’s spine. You look at her again, and like all emotion was drained from you, you say, I know what I must do for this family, Mother. I know how much our family needs this. I was made for this, wasn’t I? Your mother’s eyes widen to the size of saucers, her lips falling open to retort when you interrupt. Don’t worry, Mother. I will be happy enough with my two husbands. The contract protects me well enough and secures our family too. If marrying such dangerous men will be better for all our futures, then so be it.

~~~~~~~

Day of the wedding

The cathedral bells chime behind you, the sun from the window lighting the bouquet of peonies in your hands, your hair perfectly fallen, and your face beautifully veiled by the draped thin lace. You were ready to marry, to fulfill duty. Your mother walks into the dressing room, her face tense yet unreadable. You both hadn’t spoken to each other since the day in the drawing room. She wasn’t angry, but she also wasn’t happy after the conversation. You had left her speechless, for the first time in years, the woman who raised you with stoic words and blunt opinions, had been left speechless by you. Was she expecting resistance? Or rebellion? If she was, that was always going to be a futile feat. Were you seriously ready to give up your inheritance, lifestyle, and (well) MONEY all for ONE missing thing? Fuck no. Stories like that only end well in fantasy novels. You enjoyed the little amount of freedom you had, even if it was borrowed time. Now, you are about to be wed. What an amazing event this will be! You practice your smile in the mirror, not too happy or too depressed. Your mother’s eyes remain dull but the tiny grimace her lips form when she sees your attempts to become the perfect bride. You take the time to study your mother’s body language through the large mirror. Your eyes scan to her hands, though well-manicured for the day, there are tremors and veins so blue more profound than before. Her nostrils do not flare out like they do when she stands her ground or when her confidence is through the heavens. She is blinking too much too, her gaze averting away from you only to return. Why does she seem more worried than she let on last time?, before your mind can jump to conclusions, your mouth beats you to it.

Mother, why do you look like that?, it is of genuine confusion. But your mother’s reply is one that breaks your heart. Was this truly easy for you to accept? Are you truly ready? You are now dumbfounded. This was always in the cards for you so why is she bothered now? Mother (you say as your brows crease and arms grow goosebumps) is there something you are not telling me about my husbands?, - that makes your mother turn frigid. You fully turn to her now and take careful steps towards her. The first one makes her flinch, the next few make her tremble, - you realize, My mother knows something I don’t. You stand face to face with your mother now, she is still averting her gaze. You feel the need to implore for her to address whatever it is that has both your spines shivering. You begin to speak again, Mother-. Your mother’s shaky cries stifle your words as she brings tremblings hands to clasp your arms. Y/N, why are you not afraid? Why have you not attempted to flee? These men (her eyes look to you, - an emotion of bewilderment, terror, and frustration brewing behind them.) they can hurt you, I do not care about the business anymore! I just…, her breathing is ragged, her arms still shaking. You still don’t get it though. You know just how dangerous this marriage is, but this is the life of a chaebol daughter. The sons carry the name and business, the daughters secure ties and continue the line. It was always meant to be. Though your mother seems to disagree. Y/N, I know, I know just how terrible of a mother I have been but.. Please tell me that my harshness has not made you succumb to this. That you are truly willing to marry two men and enter the most cruel parts of this world just for this family. Are you absolutely sure you do not wish to run away?!, she yells at you. It is here you can see your mother, while disagreeing of your interests and preferences, was never ready to marry you off to the brothers. She was hoping you’d make your life different.

You watch as her resolve completely crumbles and she walks over to one of the lounge chairs on the opposite side of the room. You watch as she cries into the abyss of the window’s view, as if reminiscing a time she was never a part of. You follow her and sit on the chair across from her. She looks at you, it is one with longing and.. sadness. She looks back at the window and begins, I was once put up to marry. I, too, was ready to fulfill my duty (her tears come back silently) I was always ready to fulfill my duty. And I did. I had one son and one daughter, the perfect wife for the perfect role., she begins crying more now, and you begin to pity her. You reach your hand out to hold her frail ones and she looks at you with her tears running down her temples. But it was so taxing, Y/N. It is so taxing to succumb to THIS duty and i -. She takes a breath, she takes one good look at you, and then she pulls back. She gulps down a sob and wipes away her tears as she looks back at the window before she continues. I wanted to run away so many times, but I could not. And having a daughter, it brought me back to my childhood several times. But, I had to fulfill my duty… I was just hoping you would have found a way out, an escape. (she sobs) I was hoping you would not succumb the way I did because you found a way out once. You begin to understand now, where she is coming from. You once made a life for yourself outside of duty, responsibility, and wealth. You broke free once so why come back when you were called for duty? You don’t even know yourself, but perhaps it is just that you are used to duty. Perhaps, you succumbed to your fate long before and accepted that your moment of freedom would remain what it is - a moment. You gulp as you turn your head to the window. The cathedral in your view with multiple black SUV’s pulling up to the gates. This is it, it’s time. You sigh before telling your mother, I apologize if I have disappointed you, Mother, again. … But (she looks over at you) I know my freedom will come at a cost - a cost I despise to pay. You are both looking at each other now, words somehow doing less than the silence. Mother, I will fulfill my duty, because I choose to. That was all that needed to be said.

~~~~~~~

You walk down the long, carpeted aisle as your veil drags behind you. Your steps deliberate and your face stoic. You see the silhouettes of your husbands at the ends through the lace veil and your breath shakes. Soon enough, you are at the altar waiting for the instructions of the priest (paid for his silence). He instructs the two men, Mr. Jung, Mr. Kim, please lift the veil of your bride so you may bear witness to her beauty. The two men follow suit, Namjoon on your left and Hoseok on your right, as your veil is lifted from your face and laid atop its back end. The three of you now take a good look at one another. Your white gown, embroidered with lace-trim flowers on the bodice and a train slightly shorter than your veil makes for an elegant look with enough detail to hint at unique taste. Namjoon’s suit is fully black, with only the suit’s blazer designed with black accents to add texture. Hoseok’s suit is nearly similar, except for the white button up shirt underneath instead of black like his brother’s. As time passes, before it is time to officiate this marriage, the vows are dictated. Namjoon goes first, I, Kim Namjoon, son of Kim Sa-eon, take you, Jeon Y/N, to be my lawfully wedded wife. I vow to protect you from harm’s way and to never endanger you myself. My loyalty, protection and.. care.. is yours so long as this union prevails. The words sounded more sincere than what you used to hearing from Kim Namjoon. His pause on caring for you, however, does bring you some form of confusion. The next is Hoseok who says, I, Jung Hoseok, adopted son of Kim Sa-eon and son to the late Jung JIhoon, take you, Jeon Y/N, to be my lawfully wedded wife. Whom I shall cherish, secure, and aid, who shall have no entity corrupt you. For so long as this union stands, I shall treasure you. The vows now have your head spinning. Where was all this sincerity coming from?, you ask yourself. This was not part of the rehearsals, their vows weren’t the same scripted ones you practiced. This has your tongue going dry and the words in your head are suddenly blocked.. until the priest says, Ms. Y/N, your vows? You are now hyper-aware that you are being watched. Your breathing quivers as you gaze upon your husbands. Their faces scream anticipation and worry, worry for what - you do not know. You then scream in your mind, MAKE SOMETHING UP ALREADY!!. I, Jeon Y/N, daughter of Jeon Jae-woo and Jeon Iseul, take Jung Hoseok and Kim Namjoon (you look to both men) to be my lawfully wedded husbands. I vow to cherish and care for your and support you at your worst. (AN: Damn, quick improv huh, Y/N?? LOL) You gulp and take a deep breath as you look towards the priest and say, I promise to care for my husbands and fulfill my wifely duties for the betterment of our union. Finally, the wedding comes to a close with, Mr. Jung and Mr. Kim, you may now kiss your bride. As Namjoon approaches you, cups your face in both his hands, Hoseok taking away the bouquet from yours, he leans in and kisses you deeply. The kiss is given to you with intense fervor that your hands clasp his shoulders before the crowd cheers and you both pull away. When Hoseok switches positions with Namjoon, he grabs your waist and you grab his forearms and you share a kiss of intense gentleness. Whatever was happening, you weren’t complaining because now, you had done your duty.

==========

Present

What good was duty when you can not fulfill it in your own home. As you fulfilled your duty to your family, you now have a new one, to be their wife. And yet.. the brothers have never demanded you to do so. Never asking for an heir, for your aid, for your care, for your sex. Only taking what was bargained for, never more. You want to belong, it your duty to belong… but duty turns into misery when it is the only thing that drives you. Perhaps you should have taken your mother’s advice that day. You should have run away and left freely, where duty would not consume you and rid you of what else life could offer. So now, you felt empty, because your husbands made it clear - your duty is done and you are currently useless. Why can’t you keep to yourself and simply enjoy not being demanded of anything. What was so hard to accept? That you are not yet needed or wanted? You are left to yourself, never being stopped from gardening or shopping or cooking or whatever the fuck. So why, why must you feel the need to be needed by your husbands? Well, you guess it has something to do with the fact that you are getting up from your dresser, in your flimsy nightgown, tossing your hairbrush wherever, and walking straight out your bedroom door. The centralized air conditioning makes your skin chill and everything perks up, your nipples especially. But, you don’t care. No, you are finding your husbands right this instant. Do you know why? No. Do you predict their reaction? Possibly. Will there be anything stopping you from your determination to do whatever motivated you to be determined for? Fuck no. Now, back to the issue at hand, where the hell are your husbands! You walk downstairs to the kitchen, the gardens, throughout the living room, the drawing rooms, and nothing turns up. You are ready to walk out in your nightgown and interrogate the guards when you hear a loud sound, a crack. It echoes throughout the west hallway and it repeats again, now louder. What the actual fuck., you think that, but you are possessed to go investigate where it came from. And when you follow the echoed cracks, they get louder as you approach a room you have never been curious enough to explore. It is a two-door room, painted with dark violet to complement the fact that it is in the darkest corners of the hallway. However, suddenly, the cracks stop. They stop but you are sure they came from behind those doors. You reach for the door knob and twist it, it is unlocked. SLowly, you crack the door ajar and witness what you least expected.

Right there in the dimly lit room, a bed surrounded by racks and tables full of rope like instruments. Wait - no…those are whips. And on that bed lay the brothers, both shirtless, both entangled, both clawing at each other and their lips consume the other. You can see from the lighting which silhouette is which brother. Namjoon, the larger and broader man, is seated atop the mattress. Hoseok, his leaner frame, is nestled on Namjoon’s lap. Their noises languid and actions sinful - kissing like they don’t share a wife. It all clicks now, They don’t look to you for relief or comfort because.. they have each other. The thought cracks your heart a bit, like a piece that you did not realize you kept hold of for them had now been lost. Why do I feel heartbroken?... I never even loved them., yet here you watch them with tears in your eyes. But when you pay attention to the room, you realize what the crack sounds were. Did they use the whips on each other? Your curiosity will definitely kill you, and you know to run off and forget this. You are aware this could be grounds for divorce, could be your way out, could be the official end to your duty. But, you are stuck, watching your husbands act as each other’s lover. Some form of arousal overwhelms you watching the way their hands clutch and drag over their bodies with so much adoration. The way their kiss is full of passion and longing, like they have been waiting for one another, makes your legs squeeze closed. But then, they pull away.

Namjoon and Hoseok have turned off the world now. They stare into each others’ eyes the way they always have, with love and pain. Love for each other and pain because there are limits to that love. Namjoon cups Hoseok’s face in his hands as they place their foreheads against each other. Hoseok then sighs and says, I feel bad.. Namjoon raises a brow at that, For what?.. Hoseok pulls away from Namjoon holding him by the shoulders and saying, I feel bad for Y/N. We have completely neglected her.. especially after what you said. Namjoon sighs and nods before saying, I should not have said that to her. I know. I just (He looks away and pushes Hoseok off his lap) I just hate that it was our duty. I care about her in some way. If anything, she is amazing but she reminds me of the fact that our roles are set in stone. That you and I can’t walk out there just hand in hand. Like it is impossible for us to love each other because our love is not normal… Hoseok takes Namjoon’s face and kisses him. They know how to keep the other level-headed, comfortable, and happy. When they pull away, a salivary string continues to keep them connected. If you, to some degree, accepted the framing of your role and your duty, your husbands were on the opposite. Both trained in a world where love and affection was stripped from them, there was no room for kindness if you wanted to stay on top. Namjoon lost his mother when he was but two years of age, mostly remembering her singing to him in his sleep. And a few months before that, Hoseok’s parents were killed in an assination attempt against Hoseok’s father, the most trusted ally and friend of Namjoon’s father. Thus, they were raised to stand together as brothers, to protect the legacies of both their fathers, and kill any form of kindness and optimism. However, somewhere down the line, the brothers began seeing the other as more than brothers. Whether it was pure curiosity for affection or yearning for gentle respite, it didn’t matter to the brothers. Because somehow, in some way, they found a place of comfort, care, gentleness, kindness, and maybe even love, - all the things they were prohibited from having.

Hoseok breaks the precious silence, Our duty.. It’s not Y/N’s fault, Namu. We just have to fulfill it. There was a tinge of bitterness in Hoseok’s words, like he too hated the trap of duty. But, Y/N is also fulfilling her duty, more so than we have (that makes Namjoon raise a brow) She attempted to engage into our world! Even if she.. Welp, she certainly did terrible (Y/N: Okay, fuck you Jung Hoseok. At least I tried) But, she tried anyway, the fact she even got close enough to convince the enemy long enough to trust her was a feat in itself. You gotta give her that. Namjoon smiles at that and begins to chuckle. They both share a laugh, realizing that your futile efforts were not quite futile after all. Well, I got my well-deserved punishment, didn’t I?, Namjoon says looking over at the whip Hoseok had just used on him not too long ago. Hey, you deserved it! I have never seen Y/N on the verge of tears., Hoseok retorts making Namjoon giggle. Though, honestly, do you ever think of what it would be like to share a bed with.. A woman?, this wasn’t the first time Hoseok ever brought up the idea of sleeping with the opposite sex, specifically their wife. The thought crosses Namjoon’s mind just as much as it does his brother’s. No doubt, you were a beautiful woman. Your body curved in all the right places, not to big, not too toned, not too slim, as if your were sculpted and lean. Then your face, your hazel eyes when it catches the light shine through every so often, and your lips remain moist and plush, they would make any man, no matter the sexuality, stop to wonder what they would taste like. Then your natural grace and demeanor, oh great heavens. You were snappy at the right times, enough to humor any man as much as annoy them. But, even with attitude, there was tenderness that naturally peaked through in your regular daily behavior. That was what was vexing about you, most especially to Namjoon. Your presence perpetuated the fact that their current dynamic is unacceptable, that it was only relevant when they took home a woman. What irritated him even more was that, for some deprived cause, was that he was curious of what it would be like to bed you, hug you, hold you, kiss you.. what it would be like to be with you. Hoseok, as per usual, was more expressive and verbal about his curiosity over the years, and that ticked Namjoon off, making him reject the idea of you being their wife AND lover. But, over the years of your marriage, it became harder to ignore how you piqued his and Hoseok’s interest. Of course, Hoseok noticed it quickly as his partner of many years, and it became a gradual but quiet discussion between them. Namjoon looked Hoseok in the eye and conceded, I do not know what she would like.. I don’t even know if she will even stay, Hope. Hoseok nods at that, You are right.. but maybe, if we spoke to her like ACTUALLY spoke to her, we could reach a compromise? One that isn’t just fulfilled by duty, but also with enough kindness to ease all of us. Namjoon always likes it when Hoseok exemplifies his emotional wisdom, such a relief from the regular ‘emotions off’ mode they uphold in public. The taller brings the smaller back onto his lap for a passionate make out session. They pull away with giggles and chuckles, like teenagers with puppy love. Namjoon suddenly says, You know, Hope, I do wander what it would be like to punish Y/N. Hoseok was appalled by that, quirking a brow upward, and Namjoon continues, Hey, you wonder what it would be like to fuck her, right? Imagine how much better it would be to.. dominate her. The thought turns both men on, their cocks hardening underneath their pants. Hoseok slightly grinds his groin against his lover’s and Namjoon kisses along the other’s collarbone. What they didn’t know, however, was that they weren’t the only ones turned on by the thought. What if I did want you both two punish me, what if I like the idea too?, the familiar, unexpected voice has both men pulling away and turning towards the door they forgot to lock. Standing by the door frame, you make your way inside.

TO BE CONTINUED…

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