to: @iamclover04 i am thankful to have met you, forever my first. uhm is this even a bad boy lee know?? i'm so sorry but this looks soft omg. i'll try to make another one when i have a better idea.
a/n: and long time no see! i got really busy and there was a point i lost writing inspo. i’ll edit later.
People would always ask you the same exact question: “Why are you friends with Lee Minho?”
And you knew why they would ask that.
Minho doesn’t conform to the standards that were considered as normal, and you could say he follows the quote “live life the way you want to”. Actually, he lives by it: he sleeps during class, doesn’t talk to anyone even when others try to talk to him, and most of all, when someone ruins his mood, you can expect a fight to happen most of the time.
Most. It doesn’t happen anymore probably due to your constant whining and scolding you would always have whenever you would see the bruises on his face. At least he learned how to control himself.
That’s how people see him, but not for you. Because asides from “living life the way he wants to”, he also lives life to annoy you.
For example, a few weeks ago you asked him for his score on one of the tests the both of you took. He only gave you his paper in reply, and when you checked the score, you were surprised he got a full mark even when he sleeps all the time unlike you who actually wrote down notes and listened during class. Of course, you told him that, but all you got as an answer was:
“Thank you for the compliment"
With that sly smirk he’d always wear whenever he knew he won.
Ugh, it would be so good if you could wipe that smirk off his face and he wouldn’t have it for the rest of his life.
Why are you even friends with Lee Minho?
Suddenly, you heard the door bell ring. Are your parents back already? It’s just six in the evening and they still have another hour before coming home from work.
The bell started ringing again, but this time it went on and on continuously much to your annoyance which reminded you of a particular someone. Now's not the time to think about him though.
Opening the door, you were surprised to see the person you were least expecting to see, moreover in a terrible state. "Minho!? What happened to you?"
Bruises were adorning his face as there was an apparent cut on his left cheek. With his look, he gave you a smile before resting his head on your shoulder as he lost strength.
"Wait, let me bring you to the sofa."
Letting his arm wrap around your neck, you helped him walk all the way to the living room and let him rest on the sofa while you grabbed the first aid kit.
Going back with the kit on hand, you felt your heart clench at the sight of him. There were cuts and bruises all over, and it looked like he also had pain on his abdomen. There were many times you'd see how he looked after a fight as he would always go to you for treatment, but not once had he looked like this.
"What happened to you?" you asked as you started washing the cuts on his face, and the close proximity did not go unnoticed by Minho, eyes settling on your worried ones that were focused on each cut of his skin. "I thought you stopped getting into fights."
"Don't you even know who I've beaten up?" he questioned you while you took an ointment from the box and squeezing a bit on a cotton bud.
"Of course, they're either the people you hate or the people who ruined your mood. It's always the two," you scoffed as you pressed the ointment slightly harder on the cut than you should've done, earning a groan from Minho.
"Ow."
"It stings, doesn't it? So please don't do it again."
"I asked you if you knew who I've beaten up because it was your boyfriend," Minho awaited your response, but the only answer you gave him was dabbing the ointment on his face in a forceful way and you knew that would sting.
"Why did you even beat him up?"
"It's because he was just using you! You were being used for a stupid bet his friends made," he exclaimed, but you continued applying the ointment until you thought that it was enough.
You took a few bandages from the box and started peeling off the plastic strips. "I know," you sighed as you placed one on his cheek, and Minho's brows softened from your words.
"If you knew, then why? Why did you still date him?"
Placing the last band-aid near his left eyebrow, you let out a smile, "I didn't want to believe it. There was a part of me that wanted to think that it wasn't true or that maybe he liked me deep down. But nothing's changed."
"And besides," you continued, "You're always going to be with me, aren't you?"
Minho was left speechless. The both of you would always clash every day, with him loving to annoy you every day while you get irritated from his actions, and it went on as simple as that. But he didn't expect this different side and feeling that somehow the both of you were closer than it seemed to be.
He didn't even know that he changed because of you. That the reason why he stopped getting into fights most of the time was because of you. And you also didn't know it.
But there was a connection, a spark, a flame with the both of you that seems to intertwine. Something unspoken, something no one could ever explain.
"Yes, I'll always be with you."
"Why are you friends with Lee Minho?"
Maybe now you know the answer to it. Actually, you don't, because words can't explain the bond you and your best friend named Lee Minho have.
hi AJSGDHSJS i just want to say that your recent minho fic is so good :') the fic felt real to me especially since i relate to yn it's sad hh. minho' s line when he said "they make you feel as if you don't matter, and you are only there to be funny before they forget about you" just hits so hard i almost cried. just.... thank you for writing a masterpiece<3<3
hello (´｡• ᵕ •｡`)
oh, thank you very much for reading! it would be a terrible, but very humane, thing to be able to relate to it. i'm sorry that you do resonate with it, though (｡•́︿•̀｡) it is never good to have that kind of friendship. fun fact, that line is actually taken verbatim of me and my best friend's conversation just yesterday, so to a degree, i understand your pain and you are not alone in feeling such sadness.
we both have been going through some tough times now, for different reasons, but i suddenly had an epiphany yesterday night when i realized i got to talk to someone about it. and i was so giddy realizing that i have my person. that something i unintentionally did, as myself, that has hurt one person, does not hurt her. that even when i do intentionally cause pain, she tells me in a way that understands my circumstance while still calling me out.
and i was happy—i don't feel inferior next to her, i don't feel like her righteous behavior was all an act to make herself seem like a better person. and that usually makes me less angry and less reluctant to listen to her.
i could be myself, and i could be angry. she understands, she endures, and she waits patiently for my apology when the guilt hits me, understanding that the remorse itself would be punishment enough and she does not have to add fire to the fuel.
i genuinely hope you will be able to find someone like that, or maybe you already have (^-^*)! be angry at the world, but remember to coax it later when when you can be much gentler with it. i wish you a good day and lots of joy ♡
HI OMG I NEVER REALLY PUT COMMENTS ON WHAT I READ BUT I HAD TO FOR "ON TOP OF THE WORLD" BC IT'S SO CUTE AND IT GAVE ME BARBIE PRINCESS CHARM SCHOOL VIBES I LOVE IT. Y/N'S LINE AT THE END MADE MY HEAD PLAY THE SONG LMAOAHSGSFH im sorry i screamed this is just too cute<33
YES !! IT WAS BASED ON THE BARBIE MOVIE AND THE LINE WAS PICKED FROM THE SONG !! OMG FINALLY SOMEONE NOTICED IT IT'S MY FAVORITE BARBIE MOVIE ZBXHXBXH I'm so happy that you liked it... 🥺 Thank you so much for commenting it truly makes my day. 🥰
Hi I just recently found your account and I enjoy reading your works. It's my first time requesting to you so idk how it works? Anyways I want to request a badboy Lee Know if it's possible, I heard he really likes boxing and bruises in his knuckles are visible😭 but I think he really enjoys it tho and it reminds me of badboy Lee Know I've read in the past. Sorry I don't know how to end this but yeah😅 I hope we can be friends too! You're such an amazing writer💖💕
omg hi!! (internally screams) i'm sorry if i took long to reply but anyways thank you so much <3 it feels so good to hear that! i'll try to figure out the request things since i still have to explore tumblr but i'll post about it once in a while hehe.
as for your request, that's such a good idea i've never thought of that :') i have a lot of ideas but they're all set in high school im kinda getting tired so that's a refresher. it might take a while since it's my first time i'm so sorry for that. but of course i'll do it for you!
and yes let's be friends omg <33 sorry if it's long, i'm just really happy. love you!
date of birth: the day is 11 days after chan’s or 11 days before minho’s
languages: english, tagalog, lower-intermediate korean
groups i stan: stray kids, the boyz, red velvet
groups i want to stan: ateez, vav
bias: hwang hyunjin, han jisung, kim sunwoo, choi chanhee, kim yerim
ABOUT LUVHYJR
started: september 18, 2020
requests: closed until i figure out how to handle it hehe
i write drabbles, scenarios and imagines for stray kids only.
a/n: it was about time i did this hehe. i also want to make friends and have mutuals uwuwu so feel free to message me about honestly anything! if yall know ateez please help me get to know them lmao. that’s all x
a/n: i wrote this during class. dont be like me. i do be feeling an angst mood when writing for hyunjin hehe. enjoy having a heartbreak </3 will edit later
“You called for me, Your Majesty?” You asked as you bowed down and stayed that way - head lowered and eyes not daring to look at the person in front of you.
He turned around to face you before speaking, “Y/n, we need to talk.” You widened your eyes upon hearing his words. You should’ve expected it anyway. After all, you were acting just like how you and Hyunjin first met – a servant and the prince. The only thing that changed is that he is now a crown prince, and soon, he was going to become a king.
“But for us to talk, please look at me,” he pleaded. You wanted to, but you shouldn’t. It was already hard to ignore him for the past month since you were the one in charge of taking care of the crown prince, so your effort to drift away from him would all be in vain-
“Please.”
That’s it. You stood up straight as you slowly trailed your eyes up from his form to his eyes.
Ah, you missed seeing that pretty eyes of his – his eyes that were as clear yet delicate as the river. The ones where you could see your reflection on his sparkling eyes.
But his eyes that were locked into yours had none of those stars.
“Is there anything we need to talk about, Your Majesty?”
“Don’t call me that. Please talk to me how like how we used to before,” he spoke softly like it was a whisper. He was usually loud, sometimes even the reason why you were annoyed because you were going to have to let him recite the proper ways of how he should act and behave again. But you knew that it meant he wanted you to stay longer and not let you go.
“Fine, just this once,” you replied which turned out harshly than you expected and you could tell from how Hyunjin was taken aback.
“Just once? I don’t understand , Y/n. Why are you suddenly acting as if we were just strangers?” He raised his voice as he huffed out a breath.
“Hyunjin, you’re just a few weeks away from getting married to the daughter of the Royal Secretariat. Of course I should distance myself,” you held on to the fabric of your skirt, clenching as you couldn’t handle how things heated up.
“But I love you, Y/n. I don’t want to marry her, I want to marry you,” he exclaimed.
“This is not about love, Hyunjin. This is about you, the King, and everyone,” you jabbed your finger on his chest, “Marrying the daughter of the Royal Secretariat is for the good of Joseon, the future of the nation and its people.”
“But-“
“I can’t do those things, Hyunjin. I can’t contribute anything. I am just a mere servant of this Kingdom. I am the assistant of you, the Crown Prince and future King,” you took in a breath and continued, “I came from nothing and can give you nothing.”
Hyunjin couldn’t say anything, and that was what he hated. He hated how he couldn’t bring up with a retort and beg you to stay, and he hated how you were right.
“But we’re destined to be together.”
He remembered the time when he escaped the palace for the fun of it and found you on the streets wandering alone. And since then, he decided to bring you to the palace and take you in so that you could earn money to live. He just didn’t expect to fall in love with you.
“If we’re destined to be together, then it would be us getting married,” you answered, “It’s obvious from the start we’re not destined to be together. You were born a prince while I was born from a poor family.
“There’s no such thing as destiny for us, love.”
And it was then he knew – there’s no such thing as destiny. And if ever there was, then he doesn’t care if he wasn’t destined to be with you. Since the start, it was obviously going to be a tragic love story. After all, the both of you came from two different worlds.
He went closer to you before giving you one last genuine smile he could offer, and it was reserved only for you,
genre: high school au, friends to lovers au; fluff, slight angst (?)
word count: 887
a/n: i was supposed to post yesterday but i wasn’t able to write huhu. this was in my drafts and it was from quite a long time ago so oops. not proofread.
The truth is heavier than a lie, and that is true. The reason why we lie is all because we want to hide the truth, maybe even bury it in the mountains and under the ground where no one can possibly find out. But of course, there’s a weight you have to bear, and it gets heavier the longer it’s hidden, especially when it comes to the heart.
And that’s what made Jisung roam out and about the classroom for the 89th time today. Yes, Jeongin with his bottle of Yakult kept count.
Thankfully, the classroom is empty, with the exception of the two polar opposites inside, since it was break time. Jisung just wouldn’t have a break though.
“Jisung, can you stop? Why are you so worried?” Jeongin groaned. The first few rounds of Jisung prancing around was funny, especially since he’s always a happy kid. To be serious? That’s non-existent in Jisung’s world. So when Jisung was getting worked up with his scrunched up face, Jeongin just sat back and relaxed on his chair and enjoying this entertainment.
But not when Jisung’s might even be going around for the hundredth time. “It is, Jeongin. What if Y/n gets asked out again for the upcoming prom?”
Jeongin placed his drink on the table as things are starting to get interesting. “That’s it?”
“What do you mean that’s it?” Jisung finally stopped walking around as he stood in front of Jeongin. Jeongin’s eyes can finally take a break.
“You’re this bothered all because your best friend might get asked out for prom?”
“It’s not might, Jeongin. It’s will. Don’t you know how many guys asked her out last year? It’s frustrating to just be by her side and watch her get asked out as if I’m not there. They would ask her out at the classroom, library, the hallways, outside-“
Jeongin took his drink and sipped from the straw as Jisung continued. How funny love is. All it takes to break the cheery-merry-joyful-carefree-resident Han Jisung is to make him jealous. It’s his fault he had to keep his feelings for you a secret for a long time. How amusing.
When Jisung finally stopped his complaining which Jeongin paid no attention to, he set his Yakult on the table. “You know, you can just ask Y/n to be your fake date because to make your ‘crush’ jealous and in the end the both of you actually date for real.”
Jisung clapped his hands as he nodded, “Wow, how come I’ve never thought of that.” He put his hands on his hips and continued, “That’s a bad idea. Come on, that’s only in books you read!”
“I watch movies, Jisung.”
“Exactly! Movies are unrealistic, especially in rom-coms.”
Silence filled the room as Jeongin looked at Jisung with expecting eyes. “What?” Jisung muttered.
“I know you’re a sucker for rom-coms than me, and I know that you think I have a great idea,” Jeongin stood up as the bell rang and placed his hand on Jisung’s shoulder in assurance, “You can do it.” He smiled as he left the classroom to throw his now-empty drink and students started to come in.
“’Sung, there you are!” Jisung turned his head from the voice he could recognize even if his eyes were closed. He just didn’t need to know who in order to tell. “What’s the matter?” You asked when you saw his agonizing gaze.
It’s time. “Uh, um, I was wondering if us- I mean, you…” Jisung ‘s eyes looked around the room and noticed Jeongin sitting down, sipping on his second bottle of Yakult as he watched the scenario in front of him like it’s another rom-com movie. How scary. He looks innocent yet intimidating at the same time.
“’Sung?”
“Ah, yeah,” your voice brought back his attention as he stared at your curious eyes. “Can you pretend to be my date?”
Oh, that slipped off his mouth. That was a mistake. He shouldn’t have followed, no, listened to Jeongin’s word of advice that obviously came out from a movie plot.
“No,” you replied lowly. That’s it, if only he could jump out the window and disappear into nowhere, and maybe if it was a movie, he would go back in time or maybe even go into another dimension- “Can we not pretend?”
Jisung blinked once, twice, and thrice. “What?”
“I like you, actually. And that’s the truth. I think it’s obvious though.” Jisung couldn’t bring himself to reply He never expected this to happen, moreover you, his best friend, asking him out? “Can we not pretend to date? Can we date for real?”
“Is he dumb or is he stupid?” Jeongin mumbled as he casually waited for what’s to happen, frustrated that he can’t even skip 10 seconds for this scene.
“Yeah, sure.”
Jeongin abruptly stood up from his chair and clapped, catching the attention of the class. “Don’t mind me, go on,” he smiled.
Jisung took a hold of your hand hoping that it could calm down his beating heart, “I like you too, Y/n. For a long time actually. I can’t believe I hadn’t told you sooner-“ And Jisung continued on and on with his feelings that he’s kept the entire time.
Yes, the truth is heavier than a lie, but it is much better than it.
You muttered to yourself for who knows how many times today. You’ve been practicing those lines ever since you came to a conclusion that maybe you should confess to the person you have feelings for. Just maybe.
But you didn’t think that a simple “I love you” would be so hard to say. It’s just three simple words in a single sentence. So why is it difficult?
You’ve had a crush on Lee Felix, the main actor for the upcoming school play, for quite a while. You didn’t know how it happened or when it happened, you only knew why–he is someone who looks different from the rest. His eyes always held glitter in them like the light never left his eyes and his freckles spread across his face like stars.
He’s also the sweetest person you’ve ever met. Not once have you ever seen him get mad or frustrated, unless it’s for acting. But whenever you would see him, he wears that same smile on his face that’s enough to light up your day without him even knowing. It somehow has a warm feeling. It’s like no matter what happens, somehow, everything’s going to be all right.
His smile is a solace. And that’s what you like about him.
The only problem is that your feelings are starting to grow. The more that you kept your feelings hidden, the more that you were starting to get fond over him. And the more that you wanted to tell him how you felt.
You know, maybe you should just admit your feelings to him. You were going to be rejected anyway, so a flat-out rejection can surely make your feelings fade away.
You’re really going to do it, huh.
The bell rang and classes ended. It also meant that it was time for the preparation and practice for the play, and that you were going to do the thing that you dreaded the most.
“Y/n, can you paint the backdrop. It’s almost done but we need to add more color,” Chan, the one in charge for the props, asked you.
“Sure,” you replied.
Being a propmaker is your favorite job. Sure, propmakers are under-appreciated and do not receive attention under the spotlight, but propmakers are the reasons why a play looks so beautiful. And you love how they are the reason actors and actresses shine on stage.
The process itself is very alluring.
But of course, there are times of difficulties when it comes to the job. Especially now.
“Do I have to go up, though?” You looked up on the unpainted part of the backdrop-it’s not high, just a few steps up the ladder then you’re up there. But it still terrified you.
“Yeah, there’s a ladder right there. You can do it, yeah? I’ll help in a sec, I just have to check the lighting,” after answering without even taking a glimpse at you, he quickly walked away. Everyone seems to be so busy today. Why does the date for the showcase have to be so near?
You sighed as you had no choice. Taking the palette, you placed a few colors needed before grabbing a big brush. Glancing between where you had to paint and then to the ground, your body started to tense up.
“Need some help?” You were startled as a person with a glint in his eyes and a familiar smile caught you out from your daze.
You widened your eyes, “What are you doing here?”
“Why are you acting like we’re strangers? Just call me Felix,” he chuckled, the feather-like sound making your heart beat faster. “I’m already done with pratice but it seems the people for props have a lot to do so I came.”
“Oh, we are all busy, but no need for your help. I can manage.”
“Then I’ll just hold the ladder for you.”
You were about to decline his offer, but you really need someone to hold the ladder for you. It was high, and if you could, you would’ve asked someone to do te job instead. But nonetheless, it’s your job so you had to do it.
Nodding, you started climbing up the ladder, each step you took making you scared. But whenever you look down, which was just a few feet apart, that same reassuring smile from Felix was all you need to calm yourself down as he watched you from below with hands holding on to the ladder.
Finally reaching the top, you took your brush and started painting the surface. With each brush stroke you made on the surface, you started to lose yourself to the painting as your fear started to disappear. And there was only one thing on your mind right now,
I think I might be falling in love with you. I think I might be falling in love with you.
“I think I might be falling in love with you.”
“What did you say? Are you going to fall?” Felix raised his voice for you to hear.
Wait, did you actually say it?
“Ah, well, no. I’m not going to fall. I’ll just come back down,” you started to climb down, each time making you scared as your hands felt cold.
Finally on the ground, you peered at Felix before looking away. “Thanks for the help,” you muttered before walking away.
You hoped that Felix didn’t hear your confession. You didn’t want him to hear especially up on the ladder.
But he sure did.
He heard it clearly, he heard the exact ten words that left your lips, not missing a single one.
“Why are you walking away? Wait, I’ll help,” he ran over to you and chuckled when he noticed you looking down on the ground.
He wanted to know who your confession of love was for.
And behind that smile of his, he wished it was him.
member: hwang hyunjin
genre: best friends au; angst
word count: 1.4k
Love is a beautiful feeling.
Whoever said that is a liar. Love is frightening, daunting, petrifying – all of the synonyms of terrifying that you can ask for. That’s how love feels like.
It’s like the waves of the ocean – it goes up, high like your hopes and dreams, only to come crashing down and go back to where it once belonged to. Like a rollercoaster that brings you up and down and it wouldn’t stop no matter how much you screamed. You can’t stop loving even when you are hurting.
Isn’t it cliché how managed to find out that you love someone once you find that person loving someone else? Even moreso when he’s your best friend none other than Hwang Hyunjin – the person you’ve spend most of your life with and maybe even for the rest of your life.
You couldn’t imagine what it would be like without him. He was the reason why you laugh during class only to ge scolded by the teacher. The reason why you found a special person to confide in, the one who always makes you smile in difficult moments in your life. The reason why you get annoyed every time he acts overly dramatic only to actually like it in secret.
He was the reason why you cried when he told you he had a girlfriend. It felt immature when your tears started to fall and how he would put his hand on your hair to comfort you, saying that he won’t leave you anyway.
But that wasn’t the point. You weren’t scared if he wasn’t going to spend as much time with you like before and be with someone other than you. You just couldn’t understand why, and you only did when the next day came and you saw Hyunjin and his girlfriend together.
You love him.
It wasn’t just a simple feeling feeling of admiration or maybe even liking him – it was loving him.
And you only found out about such feelings when you felt the void right next to you, the empty spot that was only reserved for Hyunjin.
He made you laugh, happy, annoyed, and cry – he made you feel all sorts of things. Maybe that’s why you love him.
And that has been scaring you.
Because you knew you shouldn’t feel this way. He was your best friend after all, a silent promise that he was just going to be your companion for the rest of your life and nothing more. And the most important thing of all is that he has a girlfriend – a person he chose to like and to love, and it wasn’t you.
This heart of yours? It’s fine even it’s broken like shattered pieces of glass that you could never put back together again. Maybe this was something you could repay to Hyunjin, something you could give back to him for the many things he has given to you.
So that’s all right. If it makes him happy, then so be it.
You were going to let him go.
And that’s what you did. The next few days, you started to avoid him, and unfortunately, it was easier than you thought it was going to be. Knowing him, you’d stay away from the places you knew he’d go to. You’d stop calling and texting him like you did everyday. Thinking about it, he was the reason you looked forward for what’s to come. That no matter what happens, you knew that it was going to be fine as long as he’s there. So to cut off the piece of him in you like he didn’t even exist in the first place, it was too easy, painfully easy.
Was he not worried about you? Why wasn’t he trying to fix things between the both of you?
What if he didn’t care after all?
Actually, he did care, he cared far more than you thought.
When you suddenly stopped meeting or talking to him, he felt frustrated. It was like you suddenly disappeared from his life, and he hated it so much. He hated how it felt so empty, like he lost a part of himself that he knew was just there.
He was confused. Did he do anything wrong? Did he annoy you again as he always did? So many thoughts ran across his mind but it was all about you.
He missed you so much.
Yet he waited. He patiently waited for you to come to him like you always do, running into his open arms and give him all the colors in his life.
The reason why he made you laugh, happy, annoyed and cry was because of you – he did that only for you.
He didn’t know why, but it felt like it was something he wanted to give you. He wanted to give you everything that you have given to him. He doesn’t know the reason why he felt this way. It was uncontrollable, he couldn’t stop his desire to do everything with you and only you.
But why?
Why is that whatever you do, it would always affect him? Whenever you would hold on to his wrist, he would always imagine entangling your fingers with his and feel your soft touches. When you’d smile, he’d want to stare at your pretty lips and think about how to make you always be like that. When you’d cry, he wanted to hug you and wipe your tears away as you looked vulnerable. And it hurts to see you that way.
Ah, love. He loves you. And he decided to bring back the light of his day – you.
Class was dismissed and he found you by the entrance of the school walking alone. Not noticing him, it was his chance to get a hold of you without you running away again.
“Y/n!” He called your name and looked behind to see him panting, his hands placed on both of his knees. In a fracture of a second, you were about to move away until he gripped on your wrist.
“What are you doing?” You asked, yet your eyes were trailed down to his hand wrapping around your wrist. It was the touch you missed for a while.
Standing up as he looked at your widened eyes without even letting go of your hand, he replied, “You keep on avoiding me. Did I do something wrong?”
You couldn’t answer him and it made Hyunjin irritated. He wanted to know why, and he wanted his mind to stop thinking about you all the time. He was tired, yet you were all he could think about. “Answer me Y/n, did I make a mistake? Did I get your strawberry milk again? Or maybe forget a promise? Please tell me.”
“It’s because of you!” You raised your voice. “I love you, okay? I don’t since when and how but all I know is that I have feelings for you. But it’s not right. You have a girlfriend, you like someone else. And we’re just friends.
“I think I’m in love with you and I’m terrified.”
Hyunjin couldn’t give an answer as he gazed at your glassy eyes, staring at the infinite pool of black and how he could see himself there.
When you said those words, he felt his heart skipping rapidly. He wanted to pull you to his chest and wrap his arms around you. He wanted to place small kisses on your forehead, each being soft yet endearing. And he wanted to say the one thing on his mind right now, “I love you too.”
But he couldn’t. It was wrong. He had a girlfriend. He can’t just ask to break up with her just to be with you. He chose her, and it would be a shame to just push her away for another person.
He was too kind.
And so he let you go – he let go of his tight hold on your wrist, letting you free from him.
And all you could do was run away.
It was supposed to beautiful – two people who loved each other, a simple friends-to-lovers story.
But love isn’t a beautiful feeling.
──
a/n: thank you for reaching the end! it’s kind of messy but i hope it also shows and represents that feelings of heartbreak never has a perfect explanation into words and that you can only understand it when you feel it. until next time x
Jeongin opened his eyes to see the faint light of the sunrise peeking through the curtains - that and the sleeping form right next to him. You were letting out soft whimpers and snores which he finds absolutely cute. He wanted to take his phone, open the camera and record you just like that, and he would never get tired of watching it again and again without you knowing.
But instead, he chose to bask in the moment of you sleeping softly under the covers. He really likes seeing you like this, just you lying down and breathing but still managing to tug at his heartstrings. And you were the only one who made him feel this way.
He hugged you from behind, wrapping you with his arms as he buried his face on the crook of your shoulder. He enveloped himself in the feeling of your warmth against his skin and the familiar vanilla scent of your body wash.
Suddenly, you started moving as you turned around and slowly opened your morning eyes to see Jeongin's face close to yours. "Morning," he greeted.
"Morning," Jeongin chuckled at the sound of your groggy voice and the way you softly rubbed your eyes. "What time is it?"
"It's 8, why?"
"Oh, I have to meet up with my friends at around 10. I need to prepare now," you tried to remove Jeongin's arms around you, but it made him pull you closer to him which made it harder to get out. "Jeongin, I have to go."
"Five minutes. Plus, it's chilly," he replied as he hugged you tighter.
"I'm not a heating pad, you know?" Your lips turned into a pout.
"You're my only personal heating pad," he smiled, "It's too cold! I won't let you go." And the both of you stayed that way, hugging each other under the covers as you forget about your plans.
Looks like his plan worked though, because it wasn't even cold. He just didn't want to let go of the warmth called you.
"You're watching something?" Hyunjin asked as he sat down beside you on the couch.
"Yeah," you replied and Hyunjin pouted from your response.
He was upset. You didn't spare a glance at him or even answer his question other than a simple "yeah". Not like it was written in the house rules that it was required to look at your roommate or answer a question with more than one word. He just wanted you to notice him even if it's for while.
But seeing you all comfortable on the couch with your eyes glued to the screen, maybe it was okay. He could look at you for a long time and you wouldn't even notice.
Propping an elbow, he rested his cheek on his palm as he watched you instead of the new cheesy rom-coms you were currently watching.
He looked at your hands resting on the blankets that were curled up and small and how he wished he could hold them and feel your skin on his. How your mouth was slightly open from a scene on the movie that he didn't even care about. How the screen reflected on your eyes making it look like it held lights in them–bright and twinkling like stars. And how your hair, although messy from moving to a new position once in a while, was loosely let down, framing your face.
His hand reached out to touch it, holding a strand and feeling it on his hand. "Your hair is so soft..."
"Hm?" You finally tear your eyes away to look at the boy next to you.
You suddenly felt nervous when he brought your hair close to his face, inhaling its scent. "Wait," he paused.
You removed his hand away from your hair as you stood up with the blanket wrapped around your body, hugging you comfortably. You were going to die.
"No, no, no," Hyunjin muttered, the words went off his lips louder each time as he stood up and rushed to the bathroom, and that was your cue to leave.
You slowly walked to your room and shut the door closed. Here it comes.
"No! My shampoo! My wonderful shampoo," his shouts resonated through the walls. Scratch what he just said about you earlier. "Did you use it?"
You opened the door slightly and answered, "Yeah..."
"Noooo, my one and only!" He cried, "Y/n, you're going to pay for this."
You screamed as you quickly locked the door before Hyunjin could catch up, your doorknob slightly shaking as he was trying to open it.
"Your shampoo is nice if that makes everything better," you tried to ease the situation, yet you felt like chuckling at the absurdity. It's just shampoo.
"Duh, it's not just a regular shampoo. And that does not make anything better. Come on, it used to be three-fourth full and now it's half."
"You measure your shampoo bottles?? Come on, I'll just buy another–"
"But grocery's 'till next week! I can't wait for seven days."
And Hyunjin's whining went on and on. But you know, even if you used a whole bottle of his shampoo, a hundred or even a thousand, he'd still like you no matter what.
