you laugh, the sound full and resounding from somewhere in your chest where peter will live forever. “well, i did tell you it’d be easier to walk.”
“but then i wouldn’t have been able to get it from your favorite pizza joint.”
“you know i don’t mind if you go to the one around the block.”
a pair of arms snake around your waist, lips on your cheek. you melt into it all.
“yeah, i know,” he says, removing one arm from around you to pull off his spider-man mask. there’s laughter around his words like he can’t fathom that you don’t think you’re worth going out of his way to make you happy. “but i love you, so.”
“enough to risk dropping our pizza on an unsuspecting new yorker, huh?”
he grins. “yep, and more.”
you roll your eyes; angle yourself to kiss the corner of his lips. “i love you too.”
summary : peter’s not easy to shop for, so you settle for a gift money cant buy. happy birthday peter parker 😏
again, i just love ps4 peter so he was in mind while writing this. but you can imagine any of them!!
Peter’s birthday was in 3 days.
You’ve been dating for a little over 5 months, now. You wanted him to feel special for his birthday, considering everything he’s done for you over the course of your relationship.
But he’s such a hard person to shop for. You’ve been wandering around Target for what feels like ages now.
At first, new cologne seemed like a good idea. But, you already prefer the one he already uses (and you have no clue which one that is, you can’t exactly just ask him now).
The next best was new clothes. And they did have nice pairs of the flannel shirts he always seems to wear (He looked delicious every time, you couldn’t argue with that). You looked through the hangers, picked out the best looking ones, and threw them into your cart.
So now you have is a few shirts, cool. But still not enough. So you ran through a couple of gifts you thought he would appreciate. Scratch that, he has to love it, not just appreciate it.
Flowers? No, he can’t take care of them properly.
Skin care? No, he’s told you before he can’t be bothered, he literally uses just water. And yet his skin remains clear.
Shower stuff? Might give the wrong message.
Candy? Too basic.
New furniture for his ever so bland apartment? Too much money.
Gift card to his favorite restaurant? That could work, but it probably would end up being used immediately. By you.
Nothing seemed to work for him. You paid for the three shirts you picked out and left.
You were walking down the street, still trying to think of something to get him.
Your phone rang in your pocket. You put the plastic bag in your left hand as you reached for your phone with your right.
You smiled, admiring Peter’s contact photo as it lit up your screen, he was calling you. The photo was from a date 2 months ago.
He took you on a walk through Central Park, which was beautiful during the summertime.
The trees were beautifully green, and the weather was perfectly warm. He wore a black cap that day, which he rarely did.
As you two sat on a bench together, his arm sat behind you on the back of the bench. You couldn’t stop looking over at him as he spoke to you. Needless to say, he was very easy on the eyes that day. You took your phone out to take a photo. You raised it to your side to capture you both, and as soon as he realized you were taking a photo, he gave a thumbs-up and gave a little smirk smile to the camera. That picture has been your favorite of you two since then.
In that moment, you realized you were so in love with him. But you didn’t tell him. It still felt too early. And you weren’t exactly confident in the I-love-you-return. So you kept it to yourself, to this day.
Before it could go to voicemail from you accidentally staring at his contact photo, you answered his call.
“Hi!”
“Hi, Peter,” You pressed your lips together to stop yourself from smiling too much.
“Whatcha up to?”
“Nothing, just finished shopping at Target, I was bored.”
“Oh, okay. Are you busy?”
You checked the time, 2:43 PM.
“No, why?”
“I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out at my place, for a bit.”
“Duh. I just gotta head back home and do get my stuff.”
“Okay! Just tell me when you’re on your way.”
“I will, See ya later, L-“ It was a habit for you to say that when ending a call and you almost did to Peter. Good catch, Y/N.
“See ya.”
You hung up the call, letting out the breath you were holding during the last second of the call. You almost fucked up, bad.
But would it have been so bad?
Peter’s birthday is today. Still, all you’ve gotten him is those three shirts.
You feel so shitty. So you quickly came up with a plan.
You would take him out to brunch, walk in central park, and sit on that same bench, and maybe maybe maybe tell him you love him?
Which is a horrible fucking birthday present especially if he doesn’t feel the same way and has to let you down easily. But, you want to let him know he’s important to you and no gift was able to speak that for you.
What’s there to lose to just say it to him?
Everything. You could lose everything you’ve built with him. Don’t say it, Y/N.
“Hey, Peter?” You turned your body to face him, you two were sitting in the exact bench.
“Hm?” He looked over at you, his eyebrows raised.
He was wearing the new blue flannel you bought him. You washed it for him the other day and gave it to him during brunch. Immediately he had put one on (your favorite that you picked out) and has been wearing it all day.
“I wanna tell you something,” No going back, do it. You have to.
“Okay.. What’s up?” His whole body was now facing you. All of his attention on you.
“I just- we’ve been together for five months now. Which is a long time with somebody, at least to me. And you’ve become such an important person in my life and being around you has become so routine that I can’t imagine any of my free time being spent without you.”
He slowly nodded, looking confused.
“I should’ve told you this months ago, but I didn’t. I was too nervous to tell you before, and it’s really not a good time to tell you — especially on your birthday — but I can’t keep it a secret anymore-”
“Are you breaking up with me?”
“What?! Peter, no. Quite the opposite actually,” You joked, he didn’t know what you meant though.
“Oh, phew. I got really scared. You got all serious and then you started saying it wasn’t a good thing to tell me on my birthday-”
“I love you.” You blurted, interrupting his rambling.
He just stared at you, mouth still agape from him talking.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-” You started to gather your things and about to stand up and leave.
“Wait. Do you? Like actually?” He gripped your wrist, stopping you.
“Yeah,” You turned your head away from him, feeling a blush creep on your face. This was embarrassing.
“I- I love you, too.” He stood up, and positioned his thumb under your jaw to turn your head towards him.
“Wha-”
“I love you.” He repeated himself, this time he was looking into your eyes.
You both leaned in, simultaneously.
“I said it first, but I love you too.” You pulled him by his collar and pressed your lips onto his.
After a moment, you felt him smile against your lips.
“What?” You asked, giggling as you opened your eyes to look at him.
“You love me,” He teased, tickling your sides.
“Don’t get cheesy.”
“No promises,” He laughed, leaning into another kiss.
“Happy birthday, Pete.”
hehehe. okay fr tho it is actually peter parker’s birthday today and i needed to make something. this was lowkey half-assed but i kinda like it so i’m just gonna post it 🥲🥲
likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated!! 💓
summary : swinging with peter. — not that swinging you perv. web-swinging (bad joke.)
i did write this with insomniac’s peter in mind but any one of them can work here!!
“No.”
“What? Why?” Peter pouted at yet another decline of his offer, his bottom lip sticking out.
“Don’t make that face. You can’t convince me into this one.”
Peter’s been trying to talk you into swinging across the city with him for a long time now, ever since he had first told you about his alter ego.
You absolutely refused.
“Okay, 1. You know how I get with heights,” He rolled his eyes as you continued, “2. What if you let go of me? I mean, how am I supposed to even hold on?”
“I would nev-” He motioned his arms to form an X.
“Hush, I wasn’t finished. And 3. What if someone sees us? Then I’ll really be in danger. All of your “fangirls” would come for me.”
“Very valid reasons, honey. I love the way you argue with me to get your way every time,” He sarcastically remarked.
“Whatever, Pete. I’m sorry I don’t wanna die early,” You crossed your arms and let out a hmph.
“You saying you wouldn’t die for me?” He put one hand on his heart, pretending he was hurt by your comment.
You didn’t answer, the best you could do was stay quiet and ignore his antics. No way in hell would you go swinging with him, no matter how hard he’d tried to persuade you.
“Oh, so now you’re ignoring me.” He took a step to close the space between you, “I’m sorry, honey.”
“What?” You raised an eyebrow, and turned to face him, “For what?”
“For this.”
He grabbed your waist and hoisted you onto his hip, “Hold on tight,” He smirked as he pulled his mask down.
“Peter,” He ignored you. You wrapped your arms around his neck, trying to grip onto him as tightly as possible.
“Peter, I swear to God if you ju-”
He ignored your warning, and jumped off of your apartment building’s rooftop.
As you were free falling, you screwed your eyes shut completely. You would’ve screamed, if it weren’t for the fact you were focusing on trying to securely wrap yourself onto your boyfriend.
You heard his web shooter make a thwip noise as you felt yourself floating upwards now. And downwards again.
“Open your eyes, honey.” Peter whispered, he seemed so relaxed. On the other hand, your stomach was still doing flips.
You peeked one eye open, and were immediately in awe.
New York has never looked so beautiful.
The sun was setting, and was peeping through the many buildings along the horizon. Each building had so many little squares of lights, from their windows.
“It’s amazing,” You let out a breathy laugh, and looked over at Peter through his mask.
“Is this what you see everyday?” You beamed, if you weren’t as high in the air as you were, you would’ve been jealous of him.
“Yeah,” He let out a breath, “This is why I’ve wanted you here. This is what I’ve wanted you to see.” He looked back at you.
“Eyes on the road, don’t let us crash. Please.”
“Okay, okay,” He laughed.
He started to swing a little higher, and you couldn’t decide if you wanted it to be over or not. It was breath-taking, but terrifying.
He aimed at the roof of a building, and stuck the landing, luckily.
You still had your legs wrapped around his waist, and your arms locked around his neck. Whether you were on stable grounds or not, it was still high up.
“You can let go now, honey, I promise it’s okay. We’re done, now.” He reassured you as he giggled at you still being scared.
“I’m okay, after that, I don’t even think I can trust the ground. How did you do that?” You made eye contact with him through his mask.
“Do what?” He cocked his head to the side.
“Hold onto me for so long! While swinging!” You widened your eyes at him.
“Super-strength, sweetie,” He winked with the eye of his mask. You almost hit him, he was so corny. But he was so adorable.
“Peter!” You were in a fit of giggles.
“Did you have fun?” He pulled his mask up just enough so you could see his lips and the tip of his nose.
“Yeah, somewhat,” You let go of him, finally. “But don’t you ever — and I mean ever — surprise me like that again.” You made your face all serious, to show you really meant business.
“Alright, alright. I’ll try and warn you in advance next time,” He stuck his hands in the air, as a surrender.
He was so cute, you thought.
“I love you,” You smiled at him and stood on your tiptoes as you leaned into his face.
“I love you, too.” He leaned into you, and kissed you.
You wrapped your hands around his neck, as he grabbed one of your cheeks and the back of your head.
Ending the kiss early, you pulled away and brought him into a hug, swaying him back and forth.
“My place?”
“Sure,” He smirked.
“No. We’re walking this time.” You took a step back. He didn’t stop smirking.
“Peter- No, please!” You begged him as you both laughed.
He grabbed onto you and jumped before you could let go.
You hated him for a moment, but as soon as you felt his grip on you, you forgave him immediately.
Swinging isn’t so bad, but you wouldn’t tell him that.
just a short lil fluff for yall. i’m so addicted to playing spiderman again and i just can’t stop writing. 😗
(john bubniak marry me)
hopefully you all enjoyed!!
likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated!! 💗💗
warnings : angst, mentions of violence, swearing, lots of self-doubt (peter im sorry)
word count : 2.7k
summary : There’s always two sides to a story. An apology is put into place.
Peter felt like he was living three different lives at once.
Each taking so, so much energy every single day.
His job, an assistant for Dr. Octavius at Octavius Industries. He felt guilty for arriving late every day, and still somehow having a job.
Peter was smarter than Doc, they both knew that. So that meant he would be called to office very, very often.
Usually because of some mistake Doc had made while working on the new prototypes of prosthetic limbs.
But the pressure it brought could get to be too much sometimes. One small mistake could cost millions of lives — or dollars — if not noticed early enough.
But he knew it would help the world someday, in so many ways. The exhaustion was totally worth it.
Spider-Man. Peter had loved and genuinely enjoyed playing his alter-ego.
Constantly, day and night, he was out. Out saving people everywhere. Sure, his work wasn’t appreciated by everyone but it was 100% worth it — to him.
But Spider-Man came with considerable costs. His everlasting lack of sleep. Peter can’t remember the last time he really got his 8 hours. The bags under his eyes made that apparent enough.
The physicality of the job, how many times had he stopped a car with his bare hands? He lost count years ago.
The bruises, cuts, broken limbs, brought immense pain, even to Spider-Man. Sure, he can heal faster — a nights rest, a heating pad, and your some soup is more than enough — But that doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt.
And the emotional weight it brought.
The crimes haven’t slowed, if anything they’ve gotten much more prominent all around the city.
The overwhelming amount of times he has to swing across New York to fight off large groups of thugs has become too much.
And honestly, he’s so sick of it.
And so, Peter stopped pulling his punches as much.
The guilt didn’t come until later.
He climbed through your apartment’s window after a long, long night of patrol.
You were sitting there — unaware of his presence— watching TV, all cuddled up on the corner of the couch with your mini Spidey plush.
“Hey, beautiful.” He called out to you.
“Holy shit-” You jumped and turned around to look at him. “You can’t just pop out of nowhere like that, you scared the hell out of me.”
You got up and walked towards him, “Was patrol okay?”
“Uh, yeah it was alright, kicked my ass tonight though. I’m worn out,” He stretched his arms above his head.
“Hm. Why?” You raised an eyebrow at him.
“Uhm, I mean I fought bad guys all night?” He scoffed, a stupid question, he thought.
“Or was it because you practically killed someone tonight?” You bluntly said.
You had taken a step away from him, like he was a danger to you too.
“They were a criminal!” He shrugged.
“Why does that matter? You can’t just completely take someone’s life away. That’s not who you are. Before you say you didn’t, you came real close to.” You stood your position.
It felt like you shot him straight in the heart.
He should’ve listened to you. But instead, he took a shot right back at you, a shot to kill.
“Again, they’re criminals. I’m sorry I had to calm things down somehow. I’m sorry I needed to do something to catch a break for once in my damn life. And you’re not exactly helping that.” He looked away from you. He felt ashamed.
You were right, he knew that, even then. But his pride couldn’t let him admit it.
“What is wrong with you? You love Spider-Man. And you always talk about how killing sickens you. You’ve changed, Peter.” You spat back at him.
He should’ve just ended it there, stopped the excessive violence, stopped the fight. Maybe then he wouldn’t have been in your kitchen on that faithful Tuesday.
It had been two days since that argument.
His almost perfect rep was officially ruined (Jameson had a field trip that day, too). The stress was at an all-time high.
He almost couldn’t handle it. He didn’t want to anymore.
He was still so angry at you for being right. Because you always were.
You were the one who kept him balanced, who took care of him no matter the time of day or night.
He hadn’t been back to your apartment since the fight, either.
But he would return to it after a tough night the day after. And the next.
And you forgave him, so fast (He took you to see the Barbie movie, paid for every snack and drink you could’ve wanted. It was indisputable on your end). The guilt from what Peter’s put you through has just stacked on and on.
Now he really couldn’t handle it anymore. 
And so, there he was. Sat atop a random rooftop rethinking everything.
He debated his life. His three lives, more like. Which parts were worth it, and which weren’t. (It was really fucked up, who measures parts of their life in worth and just decides which to throw away?)
He couldn’t lose his job, how would he make money?
He couldn’t stop being Spider-Man, he knew that.
And there was you. The biggest and undoubtedly the most important part.
But you were also easy to throw away, he thought.
So much stress and time would be lifted off of his shoulders.
(Little did he know, it would be the complete opposite. His injuries didn’t heal all the way like they did when you took care of him. Every time he was hurt, it would linger for days at a time. He missed how much you’d worried for him. He really took you for granted.)
And so, he decided in the next couple of weeks, he would break it off.
And he did. On the Tuesday the following week.
He looks back on it — to this day — and realized everything he had said to you that evening, wasn’t directed at you. It was directed at himself.
Of course he enjoyed loving you. He didn’t enjoy being himself was what.
He needed to be his best for you because he couldn’t be with anything else. He failed at being the friendly and reliable Spider-man. Him and Doc didn’t get the grant they’d been needing for so long.
And when he did try to improve when you called him out that night, it just wasn’t enough.
He didn’t deserve you.
He took everything out on you, he didn’t mean a word he said. But you didn’t know that.
Peter never had an outlet to take anything out. He couldn’t leave you with every burden of his life, Doc and him weren’t that close, and May couldn’t know he was Spider-Man.
He snapped that Tuesday.
And there’s nothing more that he regrets in his entire life.
But he couldn’t burden you anymore. He wouldn’t.
He did nothing but keep you up late at night, hurt your feelings, and make you do everything for him.
Peter loved you. And he couldn’t let himself torture you like this.
So he forced himself to let you go. You would move on, anyways. He couldn’t.
He listened to every single one of the voicemails you sent.
Every. Single. One. He’s never heard you sound so down (Because of him, nonetheless).
It took so much out of him to not respond. More than what he had to give.
And after five weeks, he finally caved.
He texted you.
9:52 PM
Hey, beautiful.
You wouldn’t forgive him quick this time, he knew that. This time wasn’t just some fight. He tore your heart apart.
But he would work for your forgiveness, he swore to himself, God as his witness.
You read the message immediately. He knew you had gotten off of work, so it wasn’t completely abnormal.
But you didn’t respond. He checked his phone all night and the next morning (He was desperate for something, even if it was an angry text. He hated nothing more than you ignoring him).
So he texted you again. He just went straight for it this time, no holding back anymore.
1:16 PM
Can we meet up?? I think we can agree there’s still some loose ends we need to revisit, together.
Read 1:18 PM
He was patient this time. He tried stepping in your shoes, and it broke his heart. He couldn’t imagine you snapping on him like he had.
He couldn’t live if you were angry at him like he was at you. And if you weren’t going to respond again he was debating on just showing up to your apartment. Can’t ignore him that way.
2:12 PM
Y/N 💞 : “Loose ends” is a funny term. You mean when you randomly showed up to my apartment and broke up with me for the stupidest reason?
He cringed. This was a dumb decision.
2:12 PM
I know, trust me. I just want to talk. And explain myself.
Explain my biggest mistake. I’ve never regretted anything more than leaving you and taking the anger at myself onto you.
He debated on sending the message, but he didn’t.
You would just see it as him trying kiss your ass into forgiving him. It worked before.
2:14 PM
Y/N 💞 : Peter, why? Why are you only just know texting me? Why are you trying to meet up when you tore my heart into pieces? Why are you seeking forgiveness randomly?
Why are you asking such hard questions, he wanted to ask.
2:14 PM
Idk, I miss you?
I miss you and still love you. I regret that night so much.
Can you just hear me out? Please?
Nothing sounded right. But he just went for it, again. At this point, he was pacing across his rooftop, anxious for your response (If you even gave him one).
2:15 PM
Y/N 💞 : Peter, I swear. If you make me regret this, I’ll come for you. Worse than any enemy you’ve ever faced and ever will.
He laughed at that one. You wouldn’t —right?—
2:15 PM
I won’t, Y/N. I promise. Tomorrow, Micks at 3?
Read 2:16 PM
You left him on read, but he counted that as a success — you didn’t refuse his offer so.. —
He would come back from this. He has to.
Peter was late. Fuck him.
Why did you even give him your time of day anymore? This man could tear you apart and you still gave into his words.
3:13 PM
Peter 🕸️ : Babt, I’mso sotry. I got caugjt up with worl, I’m bloxks away I sqaer.
You could barely understand him, but you were used to his usually proper grammar slipping while he was swinging.
How dare he? How dare he beg you to come out here and he gets to show up late??
He practically busted the restaurant’s door open. He rushed to your table.
“Baby I-”
“No,” You interrupted. “You don’t get to call me that. Fuck you, asshole. You ask me to meet you and you show up late? Are you kidding me?” You crossed your arms and stood up from the booth you were sitting at.
“Y/N, I’m so, so sorry. I got caught up with Doc at work. Huuge internal wiring problem. I don’t even understand how he could’ve messed it up so badly,” He talked with his hands, he was so cute when he did that.
You took a step towards him, and slapped the shit out of his stupidly attractive face.
“You don’t get to break me and show up late when you wanted me here.” The tears were back. You were livid. You shoved your finger into his face as you scolded him.
“I know, I know. I keep fucking up and I’m sorry. Lets just sit down and let me explain everything. I promise you, it’s worth it.” He put his hands on both of your shoulders to keep you from leaving and tried to calm you down.
“Hands off,” You pulled his hands away from your shoulder and slumped back into the booth.
You wanted to go home.
“Okay, okay.” He sat down and stared at you.
“Well?” You waited, “Let’s hear this explanation,” You rolled your eyes.
“Well, uh-” He paused for a moment, “I don’t know how to start.”
You waited for him to continue, arms still crossed. You really didn’t want to hear him out.
“Do you remember when I almost beat the life outta that guy? Like a month ago or something?” He asked.
“Yeah.” You rolled your eyes again, not exactly a good moment to bring up.
“I feel like that’s where it started,”
“Mhm..” You nodded for him to keep going.
“I started slipping. I stopped pulling my punches and I was so stressed out every moment of my life. A-and one day I just got so sick of it,” He started choking up, you almost felt bad for him.
“So I sat down and tried to organize my life. I wanted to rid myself of stress and try to free up time for myself in order to y’know, rejuvenate.”
You sat there, you were expecting plain excuses. But it seemed he had something real going here.
“I couldn’t rid myself of my job — how else would I be able to live? — and obviously Spider-Man isn’t a choice. And there came you. The best and biggest part of my life.”
You raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to continue.
“I was stupid, I thought that by taking a break, I’d feel more free. And feel more.. well less stressed out. If I had something to myself then I would be better and feel okay? I don’t know.”
You narrowed your eyes at him.
“Don’t look at me like that, please. I was so overwhelmed with everything. I’ve been so behind on rent, and crime just never stops around here. Its like it raises more and more every week.”
“I thought-” He took a deep breath, “I thought that if I had one less chore — trust me you are not a chore to me — life would get easier.”
You’re guessing he tried to rephrase his words he said before, he’s almost repeating himself.
“But it didn’t. At all. I was in pain all the time — emotionally and physically — it didn’t help at all. I said I didn’t enjoy loving you. I lied. I didn’t enjoy loving myself- or being me.”
Your heart clenched for him. He hurt you so bad, but hearing how he truly felt made you slightly reconsider things.
“I didn’t enjoy the stress of my life, and I don’t have any outlet for my anger. And you forgave me so easily the last time we fought. And I guess I took advantage of that. I took all of the hate I had for myself onto you. I think that will forever be my biggest mistake.”
Your eyebrows scrunched.
“I love you. So much, Y/N. More than words can describe. I’ve never regretted anything more in my life and I can’t ever be away from you, again.”
“I broke it off thinking it would cause me less stress, but I understand now that it was you who took the pressure away. Being away from you, Y/N,” He laughed (At his own pain, seemingly). “I’ve never felt shittier in my life.”
Your tears flowed. Your expectations were well exceeded. He’s fucked up so much, but he makes up for it every time. And this time, it wasn’t done by kissing your ass and spoiling you, you recognized that.
“I can’t explain how sorry I am. I regret what I did to you that night so much. More than anything in the world. I just hope you can understand that.”
“I hope you can understand me.” He kept eye contact, his eyes were watery. “I know how complicated I can get,” He let out a breathy laugh.
“Pete.” You just about whispered his name.
“Yeah..?” He wiped his eyes on his sleeve before answering you.
“I forgive you.” You smiled, still crying from his well thought out (you had to give him credit) apology.
“Wait- Really?”
“Yeah. I do.”
He stood up and hugged you from across the table.
“But..”
“But..?” He repeated you, curiously. He let go of the hug to look you in the eyes.
“You’re gonna have to pay for the meal if you really want me back.”
He laughed.
“I love you.”
He grabbed your cheeks and pulled you in for a kiss. He’s never kissed you so hard.
Stunned, but pleasantly surprised, you sat there for a moment. Unsure of whether you should kiss him or not.
But you grabbed his collar and melted into the kiss.
No matter how hard he had broken you, his words brought you back to him.
And you wouldn’t regret it, you knew that.
part 2 is finished 🥹
just wanna explain a few things just in case:
peter is a lil ooc w the excessive violence and it’s not him to be like that but i feel like every body gets to that point where everything can be just too much. even spider-man.
i also feel like he needs a healthy outlet for his feelings, being spiderman, he’s constantly busy. not exactly easy to make friends. but also being spiderman, he doesn’t wanna leave y/n with all of his problems, he’s supposed to be the hero. so he bottles it all up. to the point where he just burst one day and took it out on her. (not good!!)
also i felt like him being a man, he’s going to feel insecure if y/n’s the one taking care of him all the time. he’s the man, it’s supposed to be the other way around, but it’s not. and that’s okay!! often times, old traditions still lies deep within all of us. men’s mental health matters too!! men can still feel insecure!! EVERYONE DOES. but that doesn’t mean we (as people) can take out our insecurities or anger at ourselves onto other people. most times, they don’t deserve the hate we bring onto ourselves.
that being said, not everyone can be perfect. (peter is a great example) we’re all going through something in life and are constantly being tested. but, the biggest thing is to always persevere no matter what. you’re never going to have more on your plate than you can handle. if you’re struggling, always remember to reach out to someone. a loved one, a professional, or even me. my dms are always open. i love you all. 🩷
anyways,
likes, reblogs, and comments are always appreciated!!
i hope you all enjoyed this story as much as i liked writing it 💗💗
warnings : None really, except for a few curse words here and there
word count : 1.5k
summary : Peter breaks up with you, randomly.
Also, I just want to make note that any Peter will work for this story, I just love the Insomniac’s version currently so I based it off of him 😭
You searched your pantry for something to eat.
You haven’t gone grocery shopping in a bit. You usually can count on Peter to take care of it for you, but he’s been extra busy lately.
Too busy, you thought. He was always so tired and seemed so overwhelmed. Sure, he’d been skipping out on some of your planned hangouts but you didn’t mind. He needed time to himself, and you fully respected that.
“Ooh, spaghetti..” You spoke to yourself.
You grabbed the box of angel hair and the tomato sauce from your pantry before closing it back up.
You bent down to grab the big pot from your bottom cabinet and filled it up with a decent amount of water.
You turned the heat on your oven and scrolled on your phone while leaning on the counter while waiting for it to boil.
“Hey, beautiful.” Peter appeared — literally — out of nowhere (a common occurrence, much to your disliking).
“Holy fuck-“ You gasped. “Okay, actually. Where do you come from? And how do you get in here so quietly?” You giggled as you approached him.
You stood on your tiptoes to kiss him on the cheek.
“So? How are you?” You ask.
“Well.. Y’know, tired.”
“Trust me, I know.” It wasn’t hard to miss his recent demeanor, he was so much more exhausted lately. You felt bad that you couldn’t help him more than you did.
“Yeah,” He let out a breathy laugh.
You turned around to check if the water was boiling; it was. You poured the angel hair into the pot.
“Well,” You dropped your hands to your sides, “I’m cooking pasta, if you want some.” You smiled up at him.
“I can’t stay for long, I’m sorry.”
“Oh, okay. You can take some home if you’d like?” You offered, you didn’t want him going home hungry (he literally would only ever have toast at his place).
“Nah, I just wanted to talk to you real quick. I’m gonna be gone before it’s ready.”
“Oh? What’s up?” You raised your eyebrows. You can’t name the last time he had to talk to you about something (Never, ever was it something good).
“I’ve been thinking,” He started.
“That’s a first.” You joked.
“I’m being serious,” He spat.
This time you stayed quiet. What is up with him?
“I’ve been thinking,” He bit the inside of his cheek.
“Stop biting your cheek, Pete. Spit it out.”
“I dunno if we should be together anymore.”
You turned back towards him, absolutely confused.
“Haha,” You sarcastically commented, “Real funny, Pete. You know I don’t like when you joke like that.”
“I told you, I’m being serious.”
“What? Why? Where is this coming from?” You had so many questions for him, this was all so sudden.
“I- I don’t-” He sighed, before continuing on, “I’m sorry, beautiful.”
“No. You can’t just say sorry and not explain this to me. Where the hell did this come from, Peter? I don’t understand,” Tears already starting to well up in your eyes.
“We feel like a chore. It’s like I have to be here every night, I have to text you everyday.”
“Peter, what the fuck? I’ve never once thought we were a chore,” You almost laughed, but you couldn’t. More tears had quickly followed.
“I didn’t say you did.” He spat at you. When did he become so attitude-y?
“I know, but I didn’t do anything is my point. I’ve never forced you to come over, if anything I stay up every night waiting for you. I text you. I make sure you’re okay everyday,” You were so angry. He had absolutely no reason to break it off.
“It’s just- That’s my point. You do everything. And I can’t even try.” He sat down in one of your stools at the kitchen island.
“I can’t be my best around you, and when I try to it just feels like I’m forcing myself to. And I can’t do that.” He put his head down on the counter.
“I don’t need your best, I just want you,” You were perfectly content with your relationship, nothing was wrong with taking care of him.
“Are you even listening?” He shot his head back up and scowled at you.
“Let me put it this way, I can’t enjoy loving you, and I don’t know why. How ‘bout that? Is that what you want me to say?” He finally snapped.
You didn’t want to be around him anymore. It was becoming unbearable. If he wanted to leave you, then so be it.
“I’m-“ He sighed as he pushed his hair back with his hand, “I have to go.”
He got up from the stool, and walked out. He didn’t even spare you a glance.
You stared at that door for God knows how long, but were suddenly interrupted by the water overflowing the pot.
You overcooked the noodles, leaving them gummy and mushy. Nothing could save this meal.
“Fuck.”
He never makes any sense.
You sat there, on your couch. Blanket draped over your lap, not even able to pay attention to your favorite show on the TV.
It’s been two and a half weeks. Since that Tuesday. The Tuesday Peter broke your relationship off. It’s all you’ve been thinking about.
His reasons (?) didn’t make any sense. I mean, was he just trying to come up with something that sounded valid? You couldn’t tell.
There was one thing you couldn’t question though.
“I can’t enjoy loving you.”
It’s like it was unable to leave your brain. Were you so unloveable?
You knew it couldn’t have been the end of you and Peter completely, there was still things left unresolved. Sure, you might not get back together, but you couldn’t live without Peter in your life. You could settle for friends (Right?).
But even if you did come back to him (again), would he care?
Your relationship was going so well too.
There was only one fight before Tuesday.
Your relationship with Peter had rusted, permanently. No matter if it would resolve in the near future (if that was even possible). This one would stick around.
It didn’t just ruin the two of you, you felt it everywhere else in your life as well.
It felt so hard to even hang out with your friends, while the wounds Peter had dug into you were still open.
It was hard to be anywhere, when all you wanted was to be with him again.
He brought you comfort, safety. It felt like you were constantly missing something.
You tried to call him. A lot.
Straight to voicemail every time, though.
You just wanted to fix the strained relationship, you didn’t have to be with him again (maybe).
You still loved him, no denying that. And you told him, in those voicemails.
But you doubt he listened to a single one. He didn’t care about your relationship, or you anymore. You had to live with that.
You tried. You really fucking did. You tried to get ahead of the curve, and you did. But the curve became a sphere.
It had been 5 weeks after Tuesday, you were back to square one. You decided to clean your apartment. You found the Spidey plush. Peter bought it for you on your eighth month anniversary date. You hadn’t been able to find him for a while, and eventually you forgot you even had it. But when you checked under your bed for any missed laundry, it was the first thing you saw.
It hit you, hard. When you first found him you grabbed and squeezed him and sat on the floor, crying uncontrollably. You gave up on the deep clean, you were too upset. So you sat on your couch and felt like an absolute failure.
How could a fucking plush cut you so deep? The wounds you had started to finally live with, started to hurt just as bad as when Peter carved them into you.
You caved into your old ways. You called Peter. Each time it would ring, it gave you hope. Each time it would ring, would mean he still had a chance to pick up the phone.
But he didn’t. Straight to voicemail. You didn’t know what else you expected.
“Hey, Pete.” You sniffled, looking up at the ceiling so your tears would fall out of your eyes.
“I know, I know I keep calling. I’m sorry. But I-” You paused to catch a breath. “I can’t. I hate missing you, knowing you don’t feel the same. I hate that I continue to love you the same, to this day.”
“This will probably be the last call, so you can stop worrying about that. At first I wanted to fix us, one less thing to get worked up about. But now, I think I just want to learn how to live without you.”
(You lied through your teeth. You really didn’t. But admitting it to him was probably your best shot at being able to understand that for yourself.)
“I-I’m sorry. Goodbye, Pete.”
You ended the voicemail. You sat there, on your couch, with Spidey next to you, staring at nothing.
You wanted to at least let him know you were trying, maybe then you wouldn’t seem as pathetic as you actually were.
Your phone unexpectedly pinged, interrupting your ongoing thoughts.
9:52 PM
Peter 🕸️ : Hey, beautiful.
Hi, if you’re just so happening to be re-reading this story, you’ll notice I changed up literally everything. The first version was literal ass and I hated it. So I’m hoping you’ve enjoyed it!
But if you’ve just read this for the first time, be glad you didn’t see the other one, lol.
I love you all and all of the support you’ve been giving me 🥹💗
Likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated!!
Warnings/Tags: Couple of swear words, not too much angst
Summary : Peter notices you and Harry have been all touchy-feely lately. He wonders if you’ve become bored of him already.
I made this with Insomniac’s Peter in mind but I added Ned for the sake of the story and it’s set during high school, so it’s really up to you who you want it to be.
There's something different about the way you've smiled lately.
This wasn’t new, it happened more often lately. Your eyes crinkled more, and your cheeks were rosier. Just by watching you, Peter had an urge to smile just as big. But it wasn't him who made you smile like that.
It was Harry.
Harry was a good guy, and an even better friend. But as he watched you during lunch, sitting diagonal from him, laughing at his jokes, Peter couldn't help but feel jealous.
Biting the side of his cheek (a bad habit Peter picked up, and you always looked so cute when you yelled at him for it), he decided against speaking up.
He knew he wasn't the most exciting guy in the world, but what did Harry have to offer that he didn't? Was it that date he had to cancel last Friday? Spidey duties were important, but so were you. Or was he just not all you wanted him to be?
"You okay, bro?"
"Huh?" Peter blinked a few times, trying to clear his head.
"I said, are you okay?" Ned asked again. "You've been spacing out all lunch."
Peter sighed, "I'm fine," he said. "Just thinking about stuff."
"What stuff?" Ned pried.
"D-do you think that.. Y/N-" He paused. "Is Harry more interesting than me?"
"What? Why would you ask that?" Ned's eyebrows furrowed and his eyes narrowed, taken aback by his question.
Peter's eyes drifted over to you and Harry. You were laughing at something he said, gorgeous as ever. What were you doing to him?
"Oh."
"Yeah." Peter glanced at his lap, his lips forming a line. How could you have looked so beautiful laughing with someone else? Why did he feel like crying?
The bell rang, and Peter felt like he could breathe again. The torture was over. As he got up to go, he glanced at you one more time. Walking away with him, not even batting an eye in his direction.
Peter walked out of school, heart still feeling heavy from earlier. You were standing at your usual meet-up spot. Hair slightly tousled, lips parted and you had your "focus-face" (as he liked to call it) on.
"Peter!" You looked up from your phone and walked in his direction as you opened your arms.
"Hey." Peter said, you threw your arms around his waist and swayed back and forth.
"How was your day?" You asked, peeking up at him while still hugging.
Fucking terrible. "Fine, I guess. Algebra was boring today." He lied, math was never boring for him.
"But I thought you liked that class?"
"How was your day?" He changed the subject quickly.
"It was good, actually. I aced that chemistry quiz, I just know it." you beamed up at him.
He helped you study for that one, he looked back on the "study date" you had during the weekend.
"That's good," he grinned.
"Want to hit up Del-mars? Or just go back to one of our places?" You asked.
"Let's just go back to my place." Peter swallowed thickly. Lie. He wanted to just lay in his bed, alone. Today sucked enough.
"Oh, okay. Are you feeling alright?" You stepped back.
"Yeah, yeah. Just a little tired." Lie.
"Okay." You smiled, reassuringly, and kissed him on the cheek.
"Lead the way, cutie." He forced a smile on his face.
You flopped onto his bed, letting out of sigh of relief.
"Y'know, I've always loved your bed. So soft and comfy." You snuggled up to his pillow. It smelled good, a mixture of fresh linen and him.
"Mhm," Peter mumbled, setting his books down. He just wanted to distract himself with work.
You got up and wrapped your arms around his neck as you stood behind him.
"Whatcha workin' on?" You kissed him on the cheek.
"Trying to work on English." He shimmied out of your arms.
You knitted your brows, he never did that.
"What's wrong?" You asked.
He spun his chair around and looked at you with a blank stare.
"What?" You stepped back, "Did I do something?"
"Y/N, do you want me?"
"What? Of course I do, why else would I be with you right now?"
He chuckled dryly, "I mean, you clearly prefer to be with someone who can entertain you more than I can."
"What are you even talking about?" You raised your voice. What the hell was he going on about?
"I mean, the whole lunch you just couldn't stop laughing at whatever the fuck Harry kept saying to you."
"Are you kidding me right now, Peter?" You scoffed and crossed your arms. "You're mad because I have other friends? Who I laughed with?"
"No. I'm upset because you never smiled like that with me. What does Harry do that I can't?" He stood up out of his chair.
"Nothing! I don't know what you're even getting at!"
"I'm saying, it feels like you're bored of me. Like there's something I'm not able to give you. You didn't mutter a damn word to me all day. Not until school was over." He clenched his fists and stared at the ground. This didn't feel right, being angry at you for his own insecurities.
"Peter, how could I get bored of you? Sure, Harry's a nice guy, but I love you. You're smart, caring, I mean, you're Spider-Man for God's sakes!" You stepped towards him, closing the gap, "You're amazing."
He felt his heart hit the floor. How could he have let his own feelings get to him like that? His fists unclenched, he looked up at you. Your face, tore him apart.
He never wanted that look to ever come across your face again. That sad, puppy look.
"I-I'm sorry," Was all he could get out. He felt pathetic.
"It's okay," You shushed him and hugged him.
"I shouldn't have taken it out on you," He pulled away to look you in the eyes.
"I'm just glad you said something," You smiled, softly.
He tucked your hair behind your ear, and kissed you on the lips, lovingly. You cupped his cheeks, and stood on your tippy toes to deepen the kiss.
He smiled, and laughed against your lips.
"What?" You laughed back.
"Harry is kind of a loser, isn't he?"
"Peter!" You threw your head back in laughter as he giggled back at you.
How could you have ever gotten bored, when all you've ever wanted was right there in front of you.
Hi, I'm hoping you enjoyed my first ever tumblr story! It's obviously not the best. Critical comments are always welcome, however keep it as respectful as possible.
Reblogs, likes, comments, are very much appreciated!
