Chasing Pavements

“There is, in fact, an incredible freedom in having nothing left to lose….”

[lydia-coral]

Shit…shit..shit…shit.  I’m Erica, I’m her social worker. 

[lyric-coral]

You're so much a like it's scary, you're not gonna threaten to hit me on first meeting are you? Can I ask what's going on? 

[lydia-coral]

You…you are not Lydia, dear God she wasn’t kidding about the twin thing…but you might have the answer I need. You wouldn’t happen to have seen her, have you?

[lyric-coral]

I haven't seen anyone in a few weeks, last time I spoke to her was..gosh, I don't even remember now can you  tell me who the heck you are? 

[lydia-coral]

Shit…fuck…fuck…fuck..

[lyric-coral]

And you are..?

[lydia-coral]

Why do I get the sense you’re lying…c’mon Lyric…talk to me…

[lyric-coral]

[bradleynolan]

.. You do know that this is a big deal to me, right?

[lyric-coral]

It's really not. It doesn't matter.

[lydia-coral]

Why do I get the sense you’re lying…c’mon Lyric…talk to me…

[lyric-coral]

[bradleynolan]

But who else are you gonna tell..? You shouldn’t keep yourself pushed away from everyone else.. 

[lyric-coral]

No one, and no one needs to know, or worry..it's fine, its not a big deal.

[lydia-coral]

You okay?

[lyric-coral]

I'm absolutely wonderful. 

[bradleynolan]

If you’re crying though.. It’s gotta be important.. C’mon, talk to me.

[lyric-coral]

I cant tell you...I cant, Bradley. I shouldn't of even opened my mouth..

[bradleynolan]

…Robot, are you okay? What’s going on?

[lyric-coral]

I'm okay..I'm okay, It's nothing important..

[lyric-coral]

Conceal it, don't feel it. 

[lyric-coral]

I cant believe its been /this/ long..

[lyric-coral]

No.. I’m sorry.. I shouldn’t have said that.. I don’t know him.. He seems to care about you a lot.

Yes I have, Lyric.. I know you don’t want to admit it, but it’s time I admit it. You don’t know that.. You just have to try.. You have people here that care about you. You have your sister and me. We both care about you very much. No Lyric.. I don’t know about that. They weren’t truly my friends. You were my only true friend. They were just people that were there.

No, Em. Don't do that..don't lie to me. Why would you say something like that, you wouldn't just say it to say it so there has to be a reason. 

I have nothing to admit, Emily. You haven't done anything to me and I know that, and I think you need to know that. Don't call her that..at least not yet, she's just a person who looks freakishly like me. Just a friend or something, I'm not ready to call her my sister. I barely know her. You treated them like best friends though, I mean we stopped hanging out as much once we were both on the team. 

[lyric-coral]

I cant believe its been /this/ long..

[emily-starke]

I don’t think I ever got his name, but I think that was him. Nope. Didn’t say anything embarrassing at all. I hope not. He doesn’t look like father material.

Don’t be proud of me.. I’ve done too many bad things to you. I’m not going to get better here.. I know I’m not.. I’m going to be stuck here forever and you are going to get out of here before I even get halfway through my recovery and I honestly won’t blame you. You are such a stronger person than I am. I don’t know.. I don’t want to think about them.. A part of me really hates them. 

[lyric-coral]

What makes you say that? He's a really good guy, Em..

You haven't done anything bad to me, and I am very proud of you. I'm glad that you haven't. I doubt that, I've been here for nine months and I've been still doing it, and you haven't been here that long and you haven't. If that doesn't show strength I don't know what does. But..they were your friends, Em..your best friends. 

[lyric-coral]

I cant believe its been /this/ long..

[emily-starke]

I don’t know.. Maybe just the fact that it has only been nine months.. Well, someone came up to me and told me that you two were kind of having a thing, so maybe.

I know.. and I won’t, Lyric.. I have since I’ve been here. I can’t tell you the last time I ate.. I mean, i ate an apply today, half of it that is. Because you were always my best friend, even though I am a bitch. It’s not working as well as I would like to.

[lyric-coral]

You met Drew? You didn't say anything really embarrassing did you? And we are a thing..I guess..sort of, I don't know. Definitely not anything that would result with me being pregnant. 

I'm really proud of you for not doing it, it shows how strong you really are. Listen a little bit is better than none, you need your energy and you need to maintain some sort of stamina so even if its half an apple, its better than none. We were best friends since we were little, what kind of friend would I be if I just let that go? That's my point. 

[lyric-coral]

I cant believe its been /this/ long..

[emily-starke]

Don’t think about it that way, but if you ever do have a baby I have dibs on the god mother.

Maybe I lasted longer, but that means I was purging and starving myself even longer. I don’t know about that, Lyric. I really don’t. It was yours to begin with. I was a total bitch and that’s exactly what all those girls turned me into. A hardcore bitch. I didn’t say I don’t think about them, I try not to though.

[lyric-coral]

What other way is there to think about it? I know you would, but right now we don't even have a baby daddy and thankfully so. You don't need to worry about being a god mother for a long time. 

I know that and I hate that you do, but you cant lie to me and say that you haven't done it while you've been here too, because I know I have..its only been a day since the last time I have, and I haven't really eaten that much since.  Well you weren't a bitch to me, you helped me a lot and I cant do much else than thank you for that. And hows that working? 

[lyric-coral]

I cant believe its been /this/ long..

[bradleynolan]

I don’t think so, no.      Oh wait, no. Could you bring me one of those really small containers of cookie dough ice cream? I’ve been too lazy to go get one for myself. 

[lyric-coral]

I'll bring you two, one for now and one for later. 

[lyric-coral]

I cant believe its been /this/ long..

[emily-starke]

Has it really been that long? Damn…

I know you do, Lyric and that is understanding. I did. I’m not going to have a very good luck getting into college with this place on my resume. I tried to steal your scholarship and it came back to bite me in the ass. I know we did.. I know what kind of girls they are too. I just, I don’t know what to say. I mean.. I try to not think about them. 

[lyric-coral]

I could of had a baby since I've been here and that's not really something to be proud of. 

And you think I am? You lasted longer than I did, you made it to the finals, you played under pressure. That scholarship was never mind to begin with and you really only pointed things out that I was too blind to see, but now I see them and I'm fixing them, so It's fine. I know that they weren't that..nice to us..well, to me, you were like their God but that didn't mean I didn't try..and it doesn't mean that we weren't with them everyday. How can you not think about them?