I'm understanding my struggle with liking Nesta
Its because she's like my sister
In fact, my siblings and I are all like the Archeron sisters
My younger brother is Elain. The one everyone dotes on. The one everyone admires. The one who is able to stay soft, despite all the hardships they've been through. But also strong in a way most people disregard.
Corny as it sounds, but I am Feyre. Going out of my way for my family when they can't or won't. Having to be the one to make sacrifices to ensure my family's safety. But also have a desire to create, to push others to create and heal. I've often been the beacon of comfort or salvation for many of my friends.
My sister is Nesta. Perpetually angry, selfish, hateful. But also in pain, struggling, refusing to take an extended hand because they don't think she needs or deserves it. Pushes people away because she fears closeness. She feels like we all pick a side against her, and automatically has walls up against us.
My brother and I love her and want to help her, but she doesn't want help. Doesn't think she needs it. I love her, because she's my sister and I want to support and help her, but she's so stubborn and frustrating. Its made people around us dislike her, but she doesn't deserve that.
Seeing Nesta's side, hearing her story, I understand better. She's like my sister, and its frustrating to me because like my sister, she doesn't want help, despite needing it. She doesn't feel like she deserves it.
I'm happy to see Nesta getting better as I continue. But its bittersweet because I'm seeing it for someone so much like my sister, and yet I can't seem to make the same happen for her.
