hii i saw (and loved) your "wait for me" and have a request on the same vibe"
could you write one where fem! strawhat reader was in love with sanji and confessed but he said he didn't feel the same cause he was scared of being loved, but during time skip reader grows close to sabo/law/a-character-you-seem-fit and when they reunite sanji feels betrayed thinking reader lies about loving him?
don't now if it's clear, english is not my first language
Nonnie! I'm SOO sorry this took so long to answer. 2025 was...well, you know 2025. I really appreciate your patience on this and I hope you enjoy! Also, don't even get in your head about it, you were perfectly clear with your request! ❤️
If Only
Sanji x F!reader x Law
Synopsis: Your feelings for Sanji aren’t reciprocated and you’re forced apart. But finding your peace leaves Sanji wondering if your feelings were ever real to begin with when he realizes he may have feelings for you that go beyond what he finds in your bed.
CW: Smut (p in v, unprotected sex, creampie, use of pet names), angst, unrequited love, self esteem issues, poor communication, unhealthy coping mechanisms, suicide ideation, use of alcohol, fighting, use of Y/N, canon divergence. Readers (& Law’s) thoughts in italic.
A/N: This is barely proofread. If you see any big errors, point them out and I'll fix them.
It started with the little gestures; his offers to prepare your food just so, the little snacks he saved for you when he knew you were going to sneak into the kitchen for a midnight snack. The herbal tea blends when he learned your favorites. It wasn’t hard to fall for him. You found comfort in the faint scent of herbs and spices mixed with a tinge of tobacco that started to linger in your room for all the time he spent in your bed.
At first, you’d roll your eyes when he fawned over you. Realizing how much he admired the female form with hearts in his eyes and a trickle of blood from his nose when approached by a beautiful woman. But his charm, caring nature for his crew except for Zoro , and devotion to them slowly morphed your initial thoughts of him.
Helping him prepare meals or clean up after dinners, you slowly began to chip away at the exterior that was Vinsmoke Sanji and he settled a place in your heart that began to bloom. Lingering glances turned into lingering touches which led to stolen nights together. The crew knew something was going on between you two, but neither of you had labeled it. There was merely an understanding between you both. You were his and he was yours.
“Mmph”, you catch your moan as you bite your lip. Your skin littered with small beads of sweat and bites, evidence of his worship tonight. “F-fuck, Sanji, r-right there,” you whisper breathily in his ear. “Anything for you, my dear,” he pants. You’re pressed against your cabin wall, his tight grip on your waist holding you steady as he shamelessly ruts into you.
You’re lost in the feeling of his hot breath in your ear as he occasionally pulls your earlobe between his teeth, biting and sucking the crook of your neck, and rolls his hips as he slams into you. Adjusting you, pulling your back flush to his chest as one arm moves across you to grab your bouncing breasts, kneading it desperately. His other hand splayed on your abdomen, gripping you possessively.
The sounds of your ragged breaths and skin meeting skin fills the room. You feel your orgasm coming quickly as he grips you tightly, you feel like it’s only the two of you in existence. His pace quickens and becomes more erratic. “Fuck, my love, you were made for me,” he growls in your ear. You reach up, gripping his arm across your chest, your nails leaving crescent indents in them with each drag of his cock. “Give it to me my sweet, let me feel you.” With his filthy praise his possessive hold, you do. Your orgasm washes over you as you clench and pulse around him. He whimpers and moans as you fall apart while he fucks you through your high.
He pulls back, leaving you breathless still, as he turns you around. Picking you up with ease as he kisses your neck and jaw, making his way to your lips. Your legs wrap around his hips as he lines himself back up to your quivering cunt. Plunging back into you, he kisses you deeply, swallowing your moans as he takes what he needs. “How? How did I get so lucky to have you like this?” he asks. You’re too fucked out to respond as he watches your head fall back against the wall, eyes shut tightly in bliss. “Tell me how I make you feel,” he moans.
“Fuck, Sanji. Y-you make me feel so good. I love how you fuck me, please- please don’t stop,” you whine as he has you quickly approaching another orgasm. If there’s anything you’ve learned about Sanji, he thrives on praise. Your words have him quickly unraveling as he continues pounding into you chasing his high.
Your hand cards through his hair and grips it, pulling his head slightly back as you shatter around him again, “S-shit, Sanji, yes! Make me yours,” you cry out as you cum. He whimpers as he slams into you to the hilt as he finishes with you. You feel him pulsing as his release fills you, dripping out as he pumps in and out slowly until he’s completely spent.
His forehead resting on yours as you both pant, trying to collect your breaths. He slowly sets you down, steadying you as you get your footing. He kisses you again, deeply, slowly, full of love and you warmly return the kiss. In your foggy, post coital haze, you rest your head on his chest, “I love you, Sanji,” you murmur.
You didn’t notice how his body stiffened for a moment at your confession. You didn’t notice how he never returned your first declaration of love to him. He huffs into your hair as he presses a kiss to your head, “Let’s get you cleaned up and in bed, my sweet.”
The next morning, you wake up to an empty bed. It’s not alarming, considering how early Sanji wakes to prep for the day and get breakfast started. But suddenly you remember the night before and your stomach drops. Shit, did I really tell him I loved him last night? I didn’t want to tell him post sex…fuck. It’s not like you were afraid Sanji wouldn’t return the love, but you find yourself half embarrassed that after good sex you couldn’t keep it to yourself. You wanted to tell him outside of physical intimacy. Neither of you have said it to each other before. It seemed silly, but you wanted it to feel more special.
After you’ve gotten ready for the day, you make your way to the kitchen, following the smell of coffee and pancakes. You’re last to the table but just in time for Nami’s instructions as you all approach the Sabaody archipelago. You peer over at Sanji but notice the energy is off. He smiles at you as he works around the kitchen, but it feels forced. Putting you on edge as you return to your spiraling thoughts you thought you shook off when you woke up.
After breakfast, you insisted on helping Sanji with cleanup. “Hey,” you say as you bump your hip into his, “Are you ok?” Sanji gives you a saccharine sweet smile, “Absolutely, my dear,” as he continues to clean up Luffy’s mess. You don’t quite believe him.
“If it’s about last night,” you sigh, “I know I kind of sprung that on you. You don’t have to feel pressured to say it back.” Your stomach begins to turn as you feel panic flutter in your chest. He leans over slightly and the corner of his lip turns up in a crooked smile, “What did I do to deserve you angel?” He presses a quick kiss to your head.
Despite his words and smile, it still feels forced and you worry that you scared him off, but you’re afraid to press anymore. You’ve known him for a long time, but you realize that you don’t know much about his past. Maybe he’s been hurt in the past and just hasn’t moved past it? I should just drop it where it is and not push him away, you think to yourself. So you do just that, dropping it altogether and trying to contain the worry that now sits in your chest.
The rest of the day, you pull back a bit, trying to give him space. You decide to focus on your chores and getting in some time with Nami and Robin. Hopefully they can help keep your mind off of things. Robin, ever perceptive, notices you’re off. “Y/N, is everything alright?” she asks, snapping you out of your thoughts. Nami curiously glances over. You clear your throat, “U-uh, yea! Just lost in thought, I guess.” Robin nods, choosing her approach carefully. Nami opens her mouth to say something but is abruptly cut off.
“Nami-swan, Robin-chan!” you hear Sanji call out in a sing-song voice as he comes outside. Robin sets her book down at the table next to you and Nami, sunbathing on the Sunny’s deck, and you both raise up to your elbows. “I made beverages for you three beautiful angels!” As he approaches with the drink tray, it’s not lost on the three of you that while he made a beverage for you, he didn’t address you when walking outside.
“Thank you, Sanji. These look perfect,” Robin smiles as she takes a drink. Sanji leans over, moving the tray down to you and Nami. You mumble your thanks as you take your drink and Sanji smiles as he bows out and returns to the kitchen. You look over at Nami, who is glaring at you. “Spill it, Y/N. What’s going on?” she barks.
You sigh, “Ok…fine. I need some advice anyway.” You tell them how things started between you and Sanji from the beginning. Robin is calmly listening, quietly soaking up the story you’re weaving and Nami is just enjoying some gossip. “And last night, GOD, you guys….it was so fucking good. But I think I may have ruined it. I told him I loved him. Which to be fair, is totally true, but I dunno….I wanted to wait to tell him in a different situation, ya know? And now, he’s been really dodgy since. Like, he’s trying to avoid me, but when he can’t he’s having to force like he wants me around and I just don’t know what to do or how to fix this. I told him this morning that there was absolutely no pressure to tell me he loved me back….” you pause as you pick your cuticles and try to fight back the tears welling up, “but he’s so willing to show women he loves them but he’s being SO weird now.”
“Hmm,” Robin hums as she contemplates the situation. “Something is definitely off. You’re absolutely right. Sanji thrives on female attention, and what better than to have the devotion you have expressed to him.” Nami scoffs, “I can’t believe that jackass! Zoro is right - Lovesick cook. Want me to smack some sense into him?” she smiles. You recognize her attempt to make you laugh but can only muster a small smile. “I feel like I should give him some space. I mean, we spend all this time together, but in reality, I don’t know much about his past. No more than the rest of you, I mean. I wonder if he was just really heartbroken at some point and just isn’t ready…I really do love him. I meant it when I said it.”
“Well, you do need to talk to him. Communication is key if you want this relationship to grow,” Robin says. Nami nods in agreement, “Yea. I mean these boys are totally clueless so you’re going to have to talk to him to figure out where you’re both at. You can’t ignore it forever. It’ll be ok, no matter how it shakes out. You have us!” Nami chirps as she squeezes your shoulder in reassurance. You smile, “Thanks you two. Really. I think I’ll talk to him when we get to Sabaody. That way we can get some privacy and if we need more space, with whatever happens, we can get it.”
Nami and Robin, while giving you more to think about, were also a welcome reprieve from your own thoughts the rest of the day. As you’re getting ready for bed, you pad your way quietly to the kitchen for your evening cup of tea. Walking through the door, you see Sanji. Leaning against the counter, back facing you as he smokes a cigarette. “Hey,” you nearly whisper, making Sanji jump slightly. He turns around quickly, “Oh! Y/N! How may I serve you lo-,” he stops himself and clears his through, “my sweet.”
Love….he never had a problem calling me that before.
You wrap your arms around yourself, pulling in the sides of your robe as if it would provide you any protection from whatever this was. “Uhm…I’m just getting my tea for the evening,” you point to the kettle throwing a tight lipped smile in his direction. “Please, allow me,” he gestures to a stool at the counter. “Uh, okay. Thank you, Sanji,” you awkwardly mumble.
He starts the kettle for you but what has only been a short moment in silence, feels like an eternity. “Sanji,” he stills, his back still turned to you as he preps your teacup, “Look…I'm not going to take back what I said,” you can barely hear yourself talk because the thrumming of your heartbeat is so loud in your ears,”I meant it. I do…love you. There's no pressure to say it back so please don't think you're obligated to. But I need to know, are we…..are we ok?” You fight to keep your voice from trembling as you feel like you're overheating from anxiety.
He stops and his shoulders slump down. He puts out his cigarette and sighs after a deep breath. Turning around to you, he cradles your face in his hands as he stares intensely into your eyes, half his face shrouded by the shadow his hair casts. “Y/N, angel, my sweet. I have been privileged to have spent what time I have in your graces,” he pauses, leaving you teetering on the edge of hope and heartbreak.
His thumb gently grazes your cheekbone as he looks at you with admiration but a deep sadness behind his glossy eyes. “But- I-I'm not good enough for your love. I don't deserve it, I'm not worthy of your admiration. I think it's best that we end this where it is. I can't give you the future you deserve...the love you deserve.”
There it is. Your stomach drops and your world feels like it’s tilting as your heart threatens to shatter into pieces.
“What?! What do you mean?” You plead, searching his face for something, anything other than the decision he's left you with. You step back, your hands balled into a fist on your chest, as if the feeling of your nails digging into your palm will make the feeling in your gut go away.
His hands fall to his sides, “I'm sorry, Y/N. I'm afraid I can't reciprocate the love you have for me.” And just like that, your heart shatters. You pull your lips into a thin line and nod as the world falls around you, feeling more numb by the second. “I, umm, I have to go,” you mumble as you quickly turn to leave the kitchen. You weren’t going to let him see you fall apart.
As you try to lull yourself to sleep, your mind races. Taking deep breaths, your tears begin to fall, silently rolling down your cheek to collect on your pillow as the ache in your chest grows. Trying to keep it together only makes the emotions spam in your chest. So you sob as you lie there until you fall asleep. What a fool you’ve been. You were giving him pieces of yourself and he only took what he wanted.
The next morning, you wake up. Opening your eyes that are puffy and burning, surely they’re bloodshot. You rub them trying to scrub away the evidence of the night before. Trying to hide how much he’s broken you. Luckily, the other guys don’t notice and Sanji is avoiding you. Robin and Nami certainly do but they don’t press. Assuming they’ll get a chance to talk to you later about it.
As you all take in the sights of Sabaody, the horrors you eventually uncover do well to push the hurt from your mind. You soon find yourselves fighting out of the Auction House and running to try to get back to the ship.
“We can’t stay together!! Split up and run away!” Luffy shouts amidst the screaming and smoke surrounding you all. Despite your better judgement, your heart takes you to Usopp as he helps Sanji try to escape, shielded by Brook. And to your horror, just like Zoro, with one swipe, Brook disappears. You scramble, “BRING THEM BACK! ZORO! BROOK!!,” you scream, running toward Kuma thinking for just a delusional second that you could take him.But with another swipe, you disappear.
At some point, you finally come to. Or have you? Where am I? Am I…moving? You look around you, surrounded by sky, encased in a…bubble? Looking down, you panic as you see the open ocean beneath you. Your body recoils on instinct but goes nowhere. I’m stuck…floating….in a bubble….where the hell am I going? And HOW?! But your mind suddenly clears, This means that everyone is alive! But where is everyone?
You lose track of time, but after what feels like an eternity, you see a small island on the horizon slowly getting closer. Is this where I’m finally going to land? You quickly realize, the island is coming up much too quickly and you have no way of slowing down. You feel your stomach fall as you brace for impact. Crashing onto the island, you slam through branches, shielding your head you feel a crack in your forearm as you tumble on the ground and your vision goes dark.
You wake up again but are greeted with a pounding headache and aching body before you even open your eyes. As you shift slightly, you crack open your eyes to be greeted by dappled sunlight pouring through the trees as birds chirp around you. The lull of the ocean waves should calm you. It would normally calm you but the events of the last couple…few?...days have finally come crashing down on you.
Groaning as you get up, you bring your arms up and press your palms against your temples only to be stopped short of a searing pain in your right forearm. “Shit!” you hiss. Pulling your arm down, you inspect it, finding a large lump and bruise from your crash landing. “Fuck,” you whisper, “I think it’s broken.” You sigh heavily. Fucking wonderful.
Your stomach growls, bringing your attention to the rest of your body. It’s battered, bruised, and tired. After all the fighting on Sabaody and now your crash landing, it’s a miracle you’re still in one piece. But your stomach quickly reminds you that you haven’t eaten or drank anything in god knows how long. Getting up slowly, you dust yourself as best you can with one arm. I need to find shelter….food….water. I need to find out where I am. You begin walking toward the sound of the waves. If there’s anyone on this island, there will be some signs along the coast. A port, a path to town. Something.
There’s nothing. You’re all alone on this island, except for the wildlife. You begin to feel somewhat hopeless as you realize the trouble you’re in. A possibly broken arm. No food, no tools, nothing to help you catch food, at least you found a source of freshwater. But your situation seems to become more dire the longer you think about it.
You continue walking, hoping to forage for mushrooms, or fruit. Anything that this island can give you easily. Holding your right arm close, you hold the fruits you luckily find outside of the canopy of trees and find a spot under the tree line at the beach to eat as you stare out into the horizon. It helps for a bit, but it’s not enough. Your stomach still grumbles at the meager offering you provide.
Minutes sitting in what seems to be paradise turn into hours or maybe days as you think of what you can do as you try to push away the thoughts of this becoming your resting place. Your thoughts turn to your crew and you feel a tear roll down your cheek, warm at first but chilling under the sea breeze blowing off the water. As if to torture you further, your mind wanders to your last conversation with Sanji, ‘I think it's best that we end this where it is. I can't give you the future you deserve.’ and you scoff. “Some fucking future…” you mumble to yourself. Maybe it’ll be easier if it just all stops now.
As you push your feet into the beach sand, you hear a troop of monkeys as they climb across the trees above you. You look up as they stop above you, surprised to see you there as they chitter to each other as if they were asking the same question you were asking yourself, ‘What the hell are you doing here?’ As they move on quickly, something is knocked loose and tumbles through the branches down to land on your head as it falls to the ground in front of you. “Ow! Get out of here you little shits!” you yell as you throw a small rock by your feet. They screech and scatter as you take stock of what hit you and your eyes grow wide.
A shiny silver fruit. The skin on it looks liquid, like mercury. A devil fruit? Seriously? What sick twisted fate is this? You’re stuck on a remote island with little food and what does the universe give you? A fucking devil gets dumped into your lap. You grab it and bring it closer to inspect. You swear you hear it hum as you bring it closer, turning it as it glints in the sunlight. You put it in your pocket. “I’ll save you for when I’m desperate,” you mumble.
Hunger grips its claws into you the next day. The fruit you’ve been able to forage for just isn’t enough. Especially with your injuries. By that evening, you feel feverish and begin to wonder if you should just accept your fate on this god forsaken island. Surely just falling asleep and never waking up would be better than trying to find your way back to the crew. To face a life living with Sanji on the ship after everything. A quiet death seems better.
You find yourself dipping in and out of consciousness. Your thoughts are full of fever dreams. You wake briefly, parched, and shift for water to wet your lips. Crawling to the banana leaves you keep close with collected water and sip slowly. Pulling some berries and small fruit out of your pocket you eat what left you have. Your last bite is bitter but you eat anyway, out of pure instinct to survive. Choking it down, you take another sip of water. And your eyes snap open at the realization of what you’ve done. Fuck! I ate it. Your exhaustion fights you as you try to sit up but you feel heavy like lead and your veins feel like they’re on fire. You can’t bring yourself to move anymore and again you fall into the dark your body seems to keep reaching for.
“Captain! Look!.....Isn’t that Y/N! From the Straw Hats!”
“Is she ok?”
“Her arm looks fuuucked.”
“Tch”
“Penguin!”
“Sorry, it does.”
“Is she still alive?”
Your eyes snap open like you’ve just woken from a nightmare. Dripping in cold sweat you look around and shuffle before you realize what’s going on. Sitting up on your forearms, and you wince. Looking down, you see it wrapped in bandages. Wait, what the fuck. You’re in a cold room. It looks clinical….feels clinical, Where the hell am I? Was it all a dream?
“It’s about time you woke up,” a gruff voice says from behind you. You turn and see him. Trafalgar Law, Captain of the Heart Pirates….a rival crew. Shit. I should’ve wished for death on the island more. “Uh,” you clear your throat, “How long was I out?” you ask, trying to steel your nerves. He shifts his weight as he stands there watching you, “Two weeks. I patched up your arm, but you should still take it easy. You were pretty badly injured.”
You sit up, grazing your hand over your arm. That must be why it didn’t hurt that bad when I sat up. “Oh…thanks. Look-” before you can finish your thought, Law interrupts you. “You need to learn to control your devil fruit powers better. You ruined my examination table.”
“My what?”
“Your devil fruit power. I don’t know what it is, but it has something to do with metal. You melted parts of my table and warped others when I was trying to patch you up. It wasn’t fucking cheap,” he muttered in annoyance.
“I…I’m sorry. I was delirious on the island….I ate it by accident,” you nearly whisper in shame. His tone certainly doesn’t do anything to help you try to remain calm. Forcing you to fall into yourself.
“What?! Are you serious?!” his arms drop to his sides. He sighs as he runs his hand down his face, “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” he grumbles into his hand.
“What the fuck do you want from me?!” you break out in anger. It’s easier to deal with. “I didn’t fucking ASK for any of this. To be separated from my crew, to break and nearly die on some god forsaken remote island!” you shout. Your face feels warm and your chest feels flushed as you lean into turning your heartbreak into anger. “You should’ve just fucking left me. Why the hell were you even there? Why bring me back? Why help me?!”
Law shifts, “We got word of a bounty we could cash in on that island. And lo and behold, you were there.”
Where the fuck is he going with this? Is he going to turn me in? Your thoughts betray you as he sees the color fall from your face.
Law feels bad for a moment but hides it behind his usual scowl, “Don’t fucking worry. I’m not taking you to the marines. Rayleigh told us to come here to collect something. But we searched the island and only found you.”
His words clearly don’t compute. You sit there, studying him and processing what he just said. Rayleigh? And suddenly your thoughts return to Sabaody, only to be broken by a newspaper being thrown at you showing Luffy on the front page. You read it and your heart breaks.
Ace…Luffy….
You look up at Law, glassy-eyed as the tears welling there threaten to fall. Law clears his throat, “Anyway. Looks like Rayleigh sent us your way and while you were out, we saved Straw Hat. He wants you all to train. Get stronger. We’re bringing you back to Sabaody in 2 years.”
You don’t say anything as you process everything still. “Wait! Luffy is here!? I have to see him!”
“Tch! No, he’s not here. We already dropped him off.”
As quickly as it came, your excitement at seeing Luffy was gone. Two years…..Two years to get stronger. Two years to master this devil fruit…
Metal-metal
Is that the fruit? How do I just KNOW that?
“You have another day of rest. Then, your ass is getting to work. You’ll help on the ship to pay back the damages to my equipment.” Law tosses you your cleaned clothes and suddenly you realize you’re only in a patient gown. “We start training next week,” and he turns to walk out of your quarters.
“W-wait!” you reach out. “Why are you doing all of this? Why help a rival crew?”
Law smirks like he knows something he won’t tell you. “Get some rest. Doctor’s orders,” he barks as he walks out of the room, shutting the door behind him. Leaving you with more questions and not enough answers.
Two days later, you’re awoken by a sharp knock on your door. You grumble into the covers as you roll over to your side, pulling the blanket over your face trying to chase sleep. The door is shoved open and you hear steps coming inside.
“Tch” Law blows air through his teeth in annoyance. “Get up. Let’s go. Crew meeting in 30 minutes. We’re going over schedules this week,” and you feel something land on the bed beside you with a thump. You turn over glaring angrily at the bossy Captain, only to be met with an equally contemptuous expression. “Your repayment starts today. Training starts next week,” as he swiftly walks out slamming the door behind him.
What an asshole! I have to deal with this shit for two fucking years? You look over and see what he left on your bed. A…boiler suit…with the Heart Pirates logo on it. You sigh and roll over, trying to will yourself to get up but now that your body has healed physically, your brain decides its best to drudge up emotional damage that you’ve been glad has been buried under everything else.
You find yourself in the submarine’s galley, surrounded by unfamiliar faces that side eye you as hushed whispers fill the room. You clasp your hands together, picking at your knuckles to ease your nerves. Law stands up, “Rotations are posted for the week,” the room gets quiet as attention shifts to him. “Y/N will be with us for a while. Her rotations are shared for the first month so you can train her if she’s on your shift.” The crew nods as their glances shift from him to you.
You feel uncomfortable in the spotlight and find yourself fighting to make yourself seem smaller. It’ll be fine. You try to calm yourself. It’s only temporary. You nod in Law’s direction when he makes eye contact with you. He clears his throat, “Alright everyone. Back to work.”
As the crew dismisses, you cautiously sit and a woman approaches you, “I’m Ikkaku,” she reaches her hand out to shake yours. “Finally, another fucking woman,” she huffs as she rolls her eyes. It takes you off guard and makes you chuckle. “Y/N..”
“Well, looks like your first shift is with me. We’ll get started after we eat breakfast,” she nods back to Bepo. “You’re lucky. This week Bepo is on food duty. Thank god it’s not Penguin. That wouldn’t be a very nice welcome.”
“Hey! I heard that Ikkaku! Big talk coming from someone who burns fucking water!” Penguin shouts as he approaches, a vein in his temple ready to burst.
You snicker as he sits in front of you, “Penguin,” as he points to himself, that’s “Shachi,” jutting his thumb to his right. You converse with the crew as they introduce themselves to you. They’re so bright and friendly. Totally not what you expected from their broody Captain. You begin to relax as the conversations come and go, your focus on them and not said broody Captain watching you from the other side of the room.
Despite having tasks to learn and complete during the day and getting to know your temporary crew, your days still come and go as if you were on autopilot. Wake up, eat, work, eat, sleep. It’s all you can muster. You feel numb but at least a routine keeps you from going crazy.
I can’t give you the life you deserve.
It still rings in your head.
It isn’t lost on Law. He sees the empty smiles. Only because he’s so familiar with it. The charade of putting on that act.He doesn’t ask, reminding himself he shouldn’t care.
The next week, at the crew meeting, he announces that there will be a stop for supplies. Thank god. I get to fucking see sunlight! You couldn’t understand how the rest of the crew got used to not seeing the sun. One of the best parts of being a pirate was experiencing life on the sea. The wind in your hair, the sun warming your skin, the smell of the waves as they crashed on the bow of the ship as it carved a path across the world. For the first time in weeks, you finally feel some glimmer of happiness with the prospect of having the ground beneath you and the sun kissing your skin.
Finally, the Polar Tang has surfaced off the coast of some island. You and the crew filter out getting ready for long overdue shore leave after your supplies are gathered and brought back to the ship.
“Y/N-ya..” Law calls to you. You turn around, “Law.” He pauses for a moment, “When you return, meet me on the beach there,” as he points, “We’ll start your training.” You raise an eyebrow in response. “I did some research on the fruit you ate. Clearly it has some metal altering properties. I found a list of possible fruits, I think it’s the-”
“Metal Metal fruit,” you reply.
He glares at you, slightly annoyed for being cut off. “Yes. Reading about it, you can manipulate metal. You can also draw out metal from materials. Considering you are on my ship, you need to learn to get a better control of it sooner rather than later.”
You nod in acknowledgement. “Okay, Law.” It’s all you can muster. It’s just another task, another thing to add to your list of things to do in the day to ignore the hole in your heart. You know you should probably deal with it at some point. But right now, it’s easier to bury it. Pretend it doesn't exist.
“I want you to try to shape this into a sphere.”
“What?” You look at Law skeptically as he holds out a fork to you.
“You heard me. The only way you’re going to get more familiar with your powers is to use them. This seems basic enough. Take this fork, change its shape. Try to make a sphere,” he deadpans.
Does he ever relax? He’s always so fucking serious.
Law watches you as you reach out to take the fork from his hand. Bringing it to eye level, you lower it and close your hands around it. Trying to focus on the task being asked of you. Without warning it melts down to liquid that slips out of your hand and between your fingers. “Shit!” you try to catch the droplets of metal as they fall out of your hand, trying to will it back to something easier to handle. But all that’s left in your hand is the tines and a small piece of the handle. The rest is lost in the sand. You huff in frustration.
Law hands you another fork. “Again.” You look at him quizzically. “Really? You just have a pile of forks for me to fuck up?” Law fights a smirk at your remark and simply nods to suppress the chuckle he fights back, hoping you don’t notice.
You do.
This goes on for an hour and you’re left sitting on the sand in a frustrated huff. Arms hanging over your knees as you dejectedly hang your head. Law sits down beside you. “You need a clear head to focus your efforts. We can take a break. We’ll be here for a couple days. Keep practicing.” He sets down the remaining stack of forks next to you.
You nod. Clear head…yea. I wish I could empty this fucking brain. Stop those stupid thoughts.
Your heart clenches again at Sanji’s words. It’s been a few weeks but it still feels fresh. Like it happened yesterday, and you feel heavy again. You find yourself fighting tears. Your lip quivering as you try to fight it back. But holding it all in and now with the added frustration of trying to control something you were never prepared for, the levee begins to break.
Law hears sniffles and looks over, clearly surprised, he’s left in shock unsure of what to do at the sight of you crying. You wipe your face quickly, trying to reel it in but it only seems to make it worse. Your sob rips itself from your chest and feels like it’s climbing up your throat.
He clears his throat and shifts to leave and give you space but you reach out, grabbing his forearm to stop him. Fearing being alone, you mumble, “P-please…please don’t go. I don’t want to be alone.”
He clears his throat again, like it’s a nervous tic, “U-uh…sure. Okay.,” he quietly relents as he returns to sitting, your hand still on his forearm. He cautiously places his hand on top of it, patting it gently and awkwardly, wondering what to do.
You half chuckle as you cry, “One, I’m not a dog and two, I’m not diseased….I just,” you pause, “A lot happened prior to getting separated from my crew..and I just….I just don’t want to feel alone. You need me with a clear head, yes?” you look up at him. He nods.
You sniffle and nod back, “Then I’m clearing it. But it’s messy up here,” as you point to your head, you chuckle in slight embarrassment. He gives you a tight lipped but small smirk like he knows exactly what you mean.
After a few minutes, Law breaks the silence between your sniffles, “If…if it’ll help you clear your head and to focus your energy more on honing your abilities….you can talk to me,” he quietly offers.
You close your eyes and bite your lip nervously. “Maybe in time….but right now. It hurts. Too much. I just don’t want to be alone.” You lean over and rest your head on Law’s shoulder and he stiffens, not expecting the contact. “Thank you. Even though you’re grumpy as fuck….thank you for helping me,” you whisper trying to fight a giggle.
Law deadpans at you, forcing your laughter to grow at his annoyed expression. “You crack yourself up, huh? Get back to training,” he barks as he shrugs your head off his shoulder. Your laughter grows as you wipe your tears from your face, finally feeling a little lighter. If only for a moment.
Your training with him continues over the next few months as you find yourself in a rhythm with the crew. Things start to feel more normal. You still half dread seeing everyone again, mostly because you are unsure of how the dynamic of being on the ship will change after everything. But the weight doesn’t feel as heavy as it did. More like something you can handle carrying everyday.
You laugh more freely, you joke and banter with your new found family. Law has seen it. Seen the shift that looks like the world isn’t as heavy as it used to be. He finds himself thinking about you constantly. What happened to dull the bright person you so obviously are. You still haven’t told him what happened prior to Sabaody, but the relationship between you two, spending so much time training together has become charged.
He can’t tell you that he’s developed feelings for you. Where would it lead? You’re a Straw Hat. You’re training to get back to your crew. He’s not even sure you have the same feelings for him. Sure, you flirt and tease. But he doesn’t want to make the assumption. Could it be easier to just ignore it? Maybe. It’s easier to ignore it than deal with whatever is happening between you two. So he presses on, trying to keep you at arm’s length but as you continue to heal and grow, honing your newfound skills and discovering your confidence, he finds it more difficult to ignore.
“Hey,” you poke your head into Law’s office, breaking him from his thoughts. You check the hall, sneaking into his office and closing the door behind you. “I’m not interrupting your brooding am I?” you snicker.
Law rolls his eyes and sighs, “No more than usual, Y/N-ya.”
“Ok, good. I snagged this behind Penguin’s watchful eye in the kitchen and was wondering if you would keep me company,” you beamed, holding out a bottle of booze. Before he could protest, you puffed up your chest and lowered your voice in your best mocking tone, “Y/N-ya, I have work to do.” He glares, earning your laugh.
“C’mon, Captain. You need to relax,” as you open the bottle, pulling the cork top with your teeth, “You need to clear your head, right?” as you hand him the bottle. Looking at him expectedly, your eyes glimmering. He gives you a crooked smile and swipes the bottle from your hand, “Fine. Fine. To clearing our heads?” he tips the bottle toward you as a toast and takes a large swig, smacking his lips, the alcohol burns as it settles in his stomach.
You plop down in the chair across from him as you take the bottle back, taking your own gulp. You look over all the papers scattered across his desk, “So….whatcha researching?” Law lights up and starts going over some medical paper about something, it all immediately went in one ear and out the other. You simply nod and state appropriately timed uh-huhs as he explains cellular mechanisms of some organ. All you can focus on is how handsome he is. I mean, you’ve known from the start that he was attractive. But as you’ve gotten to know each other more, you see that he’s not the asshole that people assume he is.
Yea, he’s aloof. But once you get to know him, he’s kind. Patient when it’s important to be. A TOTAL nerd. You find yourself getting butterflies in your stomach when you think about him. Not always in a sexual way. Yea, you’ve helped yourself to those thoughts about him when you felt particularly pent up. But more than that. He’s intelligent, strong, and he really cares about his crew. You never have a boring moment when talking to him. And after everything, he’s helped you feel safe, without expecting anything in return.
He breaks you from your thoughts tapping his finger on the desk in annoyance, “I’ve lost you, haven’t I. You don’t care about any of this, why ask?”
You blink a few times, “Heh….Sorry, you caught me. But I wanted to hear about something that you enjoy, “ you take another large drink from the bottle. The warmth settles in your belly as you slowly feel the alcohol taking its effect. Law seems surprised by your answer. Feeling bolder, possibly because of the alcohol, he swipes the bottle back much to your protest, “Hey! I was drinking that!”
He smirks as he takes another drink, “So, now, your turn. Tell me, what’s on your mind? Have you researched any more on how to extract metals from rock and soil to manipulate?” You roll your eyes, “Nooo,” you sing-song in faux irritation. “I’ve just been thinking,” you get quiet, trying to compose your thoughts. “I’ve been grateful. You and the crew have helped me tremendously. I was…” you pause. Unsure if you want to even slightly reopen the wound of unrequited love.
You take another drink. Liquid courage, right? “I was really hurt when you guys found me. Physically, obviously, which- again- thanks for saving me,” you give Law a corny exaggerated smile, trying to coax another smile or laugh from him. Trying to deflect…again. He simply shakes his head. “I was heartbroken when everything happened at Sabaody. I was…something with Sanji.” Law goes still as he watches you try to collect your thoughts.
“I don’t know. We were together? But it was never labeled. I thought we were more than what we were,” you stop to stare a hole into the floor. Looking up at the ceiling for a moment, you huff out a forced chuckle. “I told him one night, after sex, that I loved him. It wasn’t because of the sex,” you quickly clarified. “But, I did. And he got weird. I tried talking to him about it and said there was no pressure but I wanted to make sure we were ok.” You looked around the room, at nothing, eyes darting around like you were seeing something he wasn’t.
“He broke it off. Said he couldn’t love me the way I deserved,” you sigh. Feeling some release saying it out in the open. But saying it out loud also made it feel more real and less like something you could just push down when your heart wanted to hurt about it again. You sighed and took another drink. “It just made me feel foolish, and used. He was so ready and willing to declare his love for women….just not me. When he was the one that spent countless nights in MY bed.”
You looked up, seeing Law staring back at you wide eyed, it made you shift in your seat. You looked down at your hands and started fidgeting with your cuticles, “It just felt…feels…really shitty. You know?” You feel his stare boring into you. The attention makes you uncomfortable, not his gaze, but your brain buzzing about what happened. What he thinks. He probably thinks you’re foolish too.
You feel his warm hand reach over and pull your fidgeting hands apart. His thumb brushes over your knuckles. You look up cautiously and see Law with an unreadable expression on his face. Before you have an opportunity to deal with the uncomfortable feeling by making a joke, he surprises you. “I’m sorry. He’s a fucking idiot.” You blink a few times, as if the action will make what he said make any more sense, but it doesn’t, so you muster the only response that comes to mind, “Huh?!”
Law, definitely feeling bolder with the alcohol, stands up and moves over to you, leaning toward you as you lean back in the chair, bright eyes staring back at him. His hand moves up to hold the side of your face as his thumb gently brushes over your cheekbone. He swallows, hard, almost loud enough that you can hear it. Without giving himself time to doubt his actions any further, he leans forward and kisses you. It’s soft, and unsure, but you move to pull him closer. Opening your lips to deepen the kiss as his tongue swipes across your lip in timid exploration.
The kiss grows more heated as the seconds pass, your lips fitting together perfectly, tongues meeting gently at first until his hand reaches further and grips the back of your neck as if you’ll disappear if he doesn’t hold you tight. His other hand comes up quickly to pull you up as he stands and without hesitation, you follow to press yourself against him, pulling your arms up under his to grip the back of his shoulders.
He pulls back looking down at your stunned expression, resting his forehead on yours he presses a kiss to the tip of your nose, then your cheek, and you feel his breath hit the shell of your ear, “I said,” he huffs, “He’s a fucking moron.”
After that night, you found yourself thinking less and less of what could've been with Sanji and more about preparing for The New World with your crew. Though against your own anxious thoughts, you found yourself in another situationship with Law. But this time felt different.
It feels natural. Your affection for him grows day by day, week by week. It's easy being with this crew. It's easy talking and training with Law, so you did.
He was practically Sanji’s opposite. You felt seen and heard in ways you didn't realize was missing with Sanji. His gaze and attention never went elsewhere. He didn't fawn over other women in front of you and love bomb you to make you forget. His affection was quiet, but steady. Calm. It was exactly what you needed to move on.
Your grasp of your devil fruit powers has exploded the past few months. You're able to extract enough metal from the ground to form a small blade. Can pretty well reshape any currently existing metal objects into a weapon or a barricade to shield yourself.
Which is where you find yourself now. Training again on the ship. This time you and Law decided to stay back on the Polar Tang while everyone else gathered supplies but more importantly, took a much needed break. They were the island’s problem for the time being.
Your training has come far enough that Law wanted to start you at a disadvantage, up on the deck. For obvious reasons, the ship’s metal was completely off limits. As he lunges at you with Kikoku, you leap back, teetering on the edge of the deck railing, close to falling into the sea.
You continue to dodge his advances thinking how you were going to get out of this. You need to move quickly before Law decides to open his Room. You peer over the edge, looking for an out. Maybe I could swing around, under the railing? No, too risky. Suddenly you sense something under the crashing waves. It feels like muddled whispers coming from your left.
Curious about what would happen, you reach out, activating your powers, calling metal to your hand. Suddenly, metal wreckage from a shipwreck starts to surface. That's it! You call the metal you sense beneath the waves up, liquifying it as soon as it's freed from its watery grave and shape it to create a rudimentary bridge leading you to shore.
You laugh, caught off guard that it worked. Jumping up on the railing and off the ship. “Y/N-ya!” Law yells out to you, panic on his face. He races forward stopping at the railing only to see you smirking at him as you run down your makeshift bridge to the shore. He narrows his eyes, a devilish smirk in return as he opens his Room and teleports next to you, Kikoku bearing down, ready to strike.
Quickly, you counter, summoning pieces of your bridge to fashion a crude sword. It’s not high quality but it does the job to parry an incoming hit, but begins to chip with each hit. Finally, Law breaks your blade, cleaving it in two. The fight continues, Law continuing his advance, keeping you in a defensive position, unable to break free long enough for an offensive move.
After what feels like hours of this exhaustive dance, you’re dripping sweat. Such physical exertion is beginning to take its toll. Fuck, fighting on sand, in the sun, in this humidity and heat is killing me. How can I end this?! Your shoulders burn every time you have to lift your arms to parry or block, sweat dripping in your eyes causing them to sting every time you blink.
The stress your body is under is proving to be too much, until suddenly, you have a flashing vision. You see where Law is going to strike. It gives you the upper hand, for once. Allowing you to dodge, avoiding his thrust with Kikoku, turning behind him so you can wrap your arm across his throat, pulling his back to a new makeshift blade stopping just short of a stab.
You’re both panting, trying to catch your breaths. For the first time in your training, you have finally bested Law. He chuckles as he raises his arms, pulling one hand to your forearm across his throat spinning you to face him. “You did it. I wasn’t expecting you to suddenly bring out Observation Haki. When did you learn that?” Finally beginning to catch your breath, you smile back. “Um, is that what that was? I guess just now?” you laugh as you shrug. “It gave me the edge I needed,” you grip his forearms, pulling him to you to press a kiss to his lips. “Thank god, by the way. I was beginning to peter out with that one.”
“Let’s go get cleaned up. You’ve mastered a lot today. How did you find that metal for the bridge?” watching you with curiosity. “I don’t know. I was looking for an out and it’s like the metal was…calling to me? Nothing specific, but it sounded like whispers in a full room. I just reached out the same way I do with the ground, but it wasn’t as clear. Maybe it’s because it was through the water?”
“Well, whatever you unlocked, great work today. You’ve really come a long way. Now, again, let’s go clean up,” Law says in your ear, his voice raspy and low. He leans down to pick you up, making you yelp in surprise as your legs instinctively wrap around him. He kisses you, deep and wanting as he Rooms you into the ship, just outside the bathrooms..
Law stumbles into the bathroom with you, both of you laughing between kisses that become more and more intense each time your lips meet again. Tongues exploring each other and you pull in Law's lip, biting down just enough to make his grip on your hips tighter.
He leans over and turns the shower on, letting the water heat up as he sets you on the counter. Pulling back to hold your face in his hands as his intense gaze bores into you. You loved him like this. His eyes shining with need and want. Your hands wraps on the back of his neck, pulling him in, you kiss him again. “I thought we needed to get cleaned up,” you smile on his lips.
He groans, “Let me savor this,” and he leans back, pulling your shirt over your head, tapping your hip for you to lift each side as he pulls down your pants leaving you in your underwear. His lips latch onto your neck, gently biting the sensitive flesh with his canines and slowly presses open mouthed kisses going down. On your shoulder, your collarbone, forcing you to lean back he kisses your stomach, your inner thigh. So close to where you need him the most.
“How? How did I get so lucky to have you like this?” He asks; not necessarily to you, but the universe in general. Whatever higher power may exist. With his past, it's not lost on him when he sees what he has.
“Please…” he pauses, “I need you, Law.”
“Anything. Anything for you, Y/N.” His voice almost pained like he can't take it any longer either. Both of you remove any remaining clothing as he picks you up again, carrying you into the shower. He sets you down gently as his hands wander. Using the water to glide his hands effortlessly, grabbing handfuls of your thighs, hips, and up to your breasts.
Kneading and squeezing them, rolling your nipples between his thumb and forefinger. You gasp into his mouth at the sensation, as he simultaneously pushes his leg to the apex of your thighs and presses it into your wet, soaking heat. You chase the friction, groaning as you roll your hips, riding his leg. “So responsive,” he growls.
You reach down to grab his throbbing length smirking when he hisses at the contact. “Mmmm, I could say the same,” you chuckle as he throws his head back and moans as you twist your wrist while fisting his length.
He picks up your leg, throwing it over the crook of his arm and lines himself up to your entrance. Teasing you again as he rubs the tip of his cock in your slick, pressing just so on your clit. He pupils dilating as he watches you close your eyes, biting your lip.
Your eyes roll back as he presses in, inch by delicious inch to the hilt, stopping to give you only a moment to adjust. He pulls back slowly and begins thrusting into you, jolting your body against the shower wall as he kisses you. Eating your moans as he splits you open again and again, hitting that spot deep inside you each time with practiced precision.
You feel your stomach tightening as you clench around him fast approaching your high with the relentless pace he was now moving in, unable to contain himself any longer. Any semblance of control he had was long gone. He was lost in you, drunk off your body and the intimacy you were roiled in.
He moans, pulling you in impossibly closer, forcing your leg up higher as he opens you up more to take him. You cry out at the shift in position, feeling all of him, everywhere at once. “F-fuck, ‘m-close,” you whine into the small space between you.
“I’ve got you- hnng- cum for me pretty,” he pants as he grips you tight. Your head falls back against the shower wall as your back arches, pressing your chest into his. Your cries get louder as he rubs tight circles on your clit. His eyes blown wide as he watches you fall apart panting breathy praises and cries of his name.
His lips find yours in a searing kiss and the sensation of it all sends you over the edge. Your orgasm hitting you like a wall. Your body seizing as your grip on him tightens everywhere. “Fuuuuck,” he groans as your cunt flutters and pulses around him as he watches you. His pace becomes erratic as he quickens, bullying into you as you come down, prolonging your orgasm as he chases his high.
The bathroom, full of thick steam doing nothing to mute the sinful sounds of skin hitting skin. With a final thrust, he groans- something guttural from deep within his chest- as he presses into you further, spilling into you. He continues to fuck into you as you feel him pulsing with each press. His cum slowly drips between you as he fucks it in and out of you, both of you watching where you two meet with exasperated breath. He finally stills and releases your leg, still inside of you, as he rests his forehead on yours.
“I’m going to miss this.”
“I love you.”
You freeze, having spoken at the same time as Law. Did he just say….”
Fuck.
Law pulls out of you making you wince for a moment at the loss of him. Your mind is reeling with his confession as the warm water washes over you. He….he loves me? Do I….do I feel the same? You question your feelings, wracking your brain at a million miles a minute. Was what you felt with Sanji not love? Was it comfort? Obsession? Hesitant to say anything out of fear of saying the wrong thing, you continue to wash yourself clean. Hoping the water rushing over you will take it away for you.
As if he can read your thoughts, Law pulls you out of the water, pressing a soft kiss to your temple as he exhales into your skin. “You’re not obligated to say anything… I know this,” as his fingers on your side grip slightly harder, “is complicated.” He pauses, “I just didn’t want you to leave without hearing it.”
You look up at him, seeing the intensity of his sincerity in his gaze as he looks back at you. You nod, breaking eye contact for a brief reprieve in the feelings swirling in your chest.
“I….”
“I’m trying to figure out if what I feel for you is-”
“Stop. Please. I don’t want you to feel obligated to say it back. Just know that whatever happens,” he brings you closer so your body is pressed flush against him as he looks down at you, “I’ll wait for you.”
You lean up, pressing your lips against his with a newfound clarity. The kiss is soft, warm, comforting and quiets the turmoil in your chest and head. “I’m scared to admit that I am in love..”
“But I’m certainly falling.”
You step off the ship again, always enjoying when the ground is beneath your feet after another couple weeks underwater. Excitement and anxiety fill your gut at the thought of seeing the crew again. Your skills are honed far better than when Law found you. But melancholy tugs at your chest as the rest of the crew disembarks with you on Sabaody.
Feeling the sun warm your skin, you close your eyes and take a deep breath, humming as you exhale. Law’s footsteps sound behind you, the crunch of the dirt beneath his boots growing louder in his approach. Turning around, you smile at him, though you can only bring yourself to plaster on a fake one as your heart feels heavier at the realization that you’re not sure when you’ll see him again. You see the same feeling in his eyes as he looks at you.
“Walk with me to find them?” you jut your hand out, hoping he’ll hold it. Any excuse to prolong contact with him. He simply nods as he reaches out to grab your hand, running his thumb along your knuckles. He turns around facing his crew, “You all have your lists to restock. Get that taken care of and we’ll take a day of shore leave.”
You begin walking quickly. Already saying your goodbyes to the crew, you can’t bear standing there any longer. It tugs on your heart too much.
The walk to Shakky’s is quiet. Both you and Law unsure what to say to each other after everything. So for now, you’ll enjoy his quiet company. Until he stops you. Confused, you turn to him. Law pulls you to face him directly, holding your other hand in front of him as he tilts his head to the side, “We’re here.” You blink several times looking at the bar, trying to clock how quickly time passed between the walk from the ship to now standing in front of Shakky’s. It’s loud inside. You assume everyone is already there.
You turn back to Law, tears beginning to well in your eyes and throw yourself into him, making him unsteady on his feet for a moment. Hugging him tightly, pressing your face into his chest as you feel his arms circle your back returning your tight embrace.
You pull back to wipe the tears from your cheeks, “Law, I-”
“Thank you. For everything,” you sniffle. “And I’m going to miss this….so much.”
He smirks as he exhales, leaning forward to press a soft kiss to your forehead. “I….I love you,” you hoarsely whisper trying not to fall apart, and you hear someone clear their throat.
Snapping your gaze toward the source of the sound, you see Luffy standing outside Shakky’s. His fists on his hips and a wide cheesy grin plastered on his face and you begin to smile, until you realize, Sanji is behind him. His eyes wide in disbelief at the sight before him.
Everything you felt when you were separated comes rushing back for a fleeting second. But luckily, Luffy gives you little time to dwell, “Y/N!!!!” he shouts has he stretches his arms to you ripping you out of Law’s arms as he gives you the biggest hug you’ve yet to receive from your Captain, completely taking your mind from the confession you just made to Law.
It instantly breaks you into a fit of laughter, “Luffy!” you shout as you return his warm welcome. Sanji glares daggers at Law, as Law straightens his posture, returning an inhospitable stare. Sanji reaches into his jacket pocket to retrieve a new cigarette, watching you and Luffy shouting excitedly at your reunion as he lights it, exhaling that first puff up into the air.
You’re rambling about your newfound powers and training with Law to Luffy as the rest of the crew begin pouring out of the bar to see what’s causing the commotion outside. And as you hug and greet and talk with the remainder of the crew, you miss Law slowly stepping back. His frown growing heavier at the thought of leaving you behind when suddenly, a stretchy arm reaches out and pulls him into the fray.
You giggle at his awkward and clearly mad expression when Luffy tugs him close, “Shi-shi-shi,” Luffy laughs, “Thanks Traffy, for helping Y/N.”
“Let me go,” Law deadpans. But unfortunately for him, Luffy doesn’t get the hint. Eventually Luffy releases him, throwing his fist into the air as he walks back into the bar, “Let’s have another drink!! Everyone is here! We’re ready for the New World,” his shouts and laughs grow muffled as he disappears into the building.
As the rest of the crew follows suit, slowly filing into the bar, you turn to Law. “I….I’m going to head inside…but...I’ll come say goodbye again. Don’t leave without it, ok?” you sheepishly mumble. Your heart is torn between being back with your crew, but also wanting to prolong whatever time you can continue to have with Law.
The corner of Law’s lip turns up in a small smirk as he throws his hands in his pockets. “You know where we’ll be,” he nods. You step forward again and kiss him, your heart bouncing between heavy and light as he deepens the kiss.
You pull away and begin walking backwards toward the door, watching as he turns away and quietly returns to his ship. Willing the tightness in your chest away, you turn away to walk into the bar but are abruptly stopped. Looking up, you see Sanji standing in front of you and instantly, your stomach drops.
You clear your throat, “Uh, hi Sanji,” you try to stand up straight seeing the irritation and hurt on his face. “Y/N…my dear.”
He’s clearly upset. The cigarette between his lip twitches as he tightens them trying to find the words to say. You grow more frustrated as he watches you. “Is there something you want to talk about?” You point into the bar, “I’d like to go inside and catch up with everyone.”
He taps his foot as he reaches up the grab his cigarette, pushing out smoke in a frustrated huff. “I could’ve sworn I heard you tell Law that you loved him,” he chuckles darkly. “Is that true? Was what you told me all a lie?” he question burning with feelings of betrayal.
You furrow your brows, “Are you fucking serious, Sanji? What’s it to you? You made your feelings for me clear two years ago. I-”
“Well! It was foolish of me to be dismissive of it. I spent the last two years in HELL. Y/N you have no idea what it was like out there. Yea, I had plenty of time for training but it was bereft of beauty….there were no women....there was no you.” he cuts you off.
“I didn’t realize what I had until it was gone. Cliche, I know. But, I was hoping we could…”he reaches out to touch your cheek. And you pull back just out of his reach, shaking your head no.
“No, Sanji. I’ve healed. I’ve moved on. I think it’s best that we just return to being crew members…friends.”
He stills, his face losing color before quickly turning slightly red. “So, what? Were you just lying to me about how you feel?” his frustration rising.
“Again, no.. Sanji…I meant what I said. But..but..-”
“But what,Y/N?”
Frustrated with his own shifts from frustration, to sadness, and anger you lash out, “But you broke my heart, Sanji!” you shout, throwing your arms up into the air.
You begin pacing back and forth, your body telling you to move as your emotions about everything bubble to the surface. “You have NO problems showing other women love but the minute I express it, it’s not good enough!” He stills, eyes wide, surprised by your outburst.
You step closer pointing your finger at him, pressing it square into his chest, “You fucking broke my heart, Sanji. And then we were separated for TWO years. What did you expect me to just forget about that pain and wait to see you again and maybe I’d beg for you back?! That I’d come running to you?”
You see the sadness fall over his face, “Y/N, I-”
“No. Sanji. No. You don’t get to do this after what happened and after all this time. Yes. I loved you, whether you believe it or not. But I…don’t anymore. I’ve moved on, shouldn’t you be happy about that? I mean this conversation is two years too late,” you huff in exasperation.
He takes a long drag from his cigarette, “Y/N/…I. I’m sorry.”
You blink in surprise. Feeling the tension settle as you’ve finally gotten it off your chest.
“I was…scared. It’s-,” he stops himself and sighs as he somberly shakes his head. “It’s difficult for me to accept love. I don’t ever feel like I deserve it. Because why would I? Why does someone like me deserve your love? But spending two years away, on that god forsaken island,” he shivers as he recalls the memories.
“I still don’t think I deserve your love, but I’m willing to prove my devotion to you for the rest of my days, if you’ll let me.”
And there it is. The confession that you wished he gave you two years ago. Your heart hurts for someone to feel with way about themselves and it tugs at you. Bringing you back to what could be. But you shake your head to clear it of those thoughts. What ifs never do anyone good.
“I’m sorry, Sanji. I can’t. It’s too late. I love you as a friend and a member of this crew, but what’s done is done. My heart has moved on and it’s not a play thing. I will be here for you as a friend. But I have to respect myself and LAW. I don’t know where that will go, but my heart is with him.” Your pulse is racing, heartbeat in your ears as you try to muster the strongest facade. Confrontation like this was never your strong suit, but you’ve found your resolve.
Sanji’s head droops as he nods in slow acceptance and steps to the side, finally allowing you to pass. You exhale a breath you didn’t realize you were holding walking past him into the bar leaving him behind as he blows another puff of smoke into the air.
After the crew’s raucous reunion has finally settled, everyone is taking up their own corner of the bar chatting quietly. You’re sitting alone, fiddling with what used to be a metal utensil as you sip your drink and reshape and reform the metal with your other hand, lost in thought. Well, it could be worse. When I was expecting to fall apart, I managed to deal with it. When your thoughts begin to wander to Law, there’s a shift in the seat in front of you. “Whoa, Y/N, that’s really cool!”” Luffy calls out as he watches you use your devil fruit powers.
You look up, somewhat startled when you snap out of it. “Oh! Luffy. Hey,” you mumble somberly. He tilts his head at you like a confused puppy. “What’s wrong, Y/N?”
You sigh, “It’s just, been a REALLY long day, Luffy,” you sigh. “Don’t get me wrong,” you take a large gulp of your drink, “I’m so happy to be back and that everyone is together again,” you look up. A small smile breaks across your face as you scan the bar at the crew. Chopper, Usopp, and Franky are playing cards. Nami and Robin, gabbing with Shakky. Zoro and Sanji arguing and bickering over something. You chuckle when Zoro stands up so quickly his chair flips backwards as he grabs Sanji’s shirt, curling it in his fist, shaking the other in the air and Sanji is pulling his fist back ready to throw a punch.
You chuckle and shake your head, “I’m just really going to miss-”
“Traffy?!” Luffy blurts out.
“Yea, Traffy,” you muse.
Luffy looks at the metal in your hands and back up to you, “He seems great. Maybe some day we’ll be friends,” he grins his signature smile.
“Yea,” you huff lightheartedly as you shift to sit straighter in your seat. “Maybe…I think I did something really stupid thought, Captain.”
“What-dya mean?” he questions.
“I-I fell for him, Luffy. He’s the Captain of a rival crew. I let my feelings get in the way. I mean…I guess it’s to be expected to feel something after all the time he and I spent together to train. But it doesn’t make this easy. Ya know? I can’t make this work. I’m a Strawhat. He’s a Heart PIrate. Two different crews, two different Captains. It’s not like I can split my time,” you laugh to yourself.
“Why not?” Luffy questions, like there’s an answer to everything.
Later that evening, you find yourself walking quietly to the dock where the Polar Tang is hidden. It’s quiet, save for a couple crew members on board to keep watch of the ship. Your eyes scan for anything else in the area and in a break in the tree cover, you see Law, polishing Kikoku next to a couple lanterns in a makeshift camp.
You smile softly at his concentration and feel warmth bloom in your chest. “I think she’s sharp enough, Law,” you call out, breaking him from his routine as his head snaps up to see you. He smiles back at you as he chuckles under his breath.”Y/N,” he sets Kikoku and the rag in his hand down, standing up and wiping his hands together.
You pick up your pace to a near sprint toward him and jump up into his embrace. His arms hold you against him tightly as he steadies his footing. You hear him breath a sigh of relief in your ear. “So…this is goodbye?” he whispers. You pull back to look at him, your eyes bright, “What if it doesn’t have to be?”
He furrows his brow in confusion, mouth opening slightly like he wants to say something but it gets stuck in his throat. “What? What do you mean?”
You look at him excitedly, “Luffy and I talked. He agreed to let me train with you for a while longer,” you pause, looking away for a moment, “If you’ll have me,” you smile as you look back at him again.
His mouth drops open showing his surprise as he processes the information. Focusing his gaze from one eye to the other and his glance drops down to your lips. You can’t handle your excitement any longer, knowing what his response will be anyway. Your arms slung over his shoulders reach for the back of his neck as you pull him to you in a desperate kiss. Your lips fitting together like puzzle pieces. As his tongue swipes across your lip, you open your mouth, tongues meeting together and exploring each other as if it were the first time all over again. You pull back for a breath and rest your forehead on his, “You said you’d wait for me, but I don’t want to wait.”
AHHHH!!!! It's finally done. This story took me forever to mull through. I, like many other writers on this platform, do it for fun. And honestly, it was really hard to get into the headspace to write this. But I'm glad I was able to work on it from time to time and chip away. I just didn't want it to be rushed or incomplete. Even though as I type this, I DO feel like it was rushed. But I'm posting it anyway because otherwise I won't. So there. I hope you enjoyed.
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Tags: @shy-writer-999
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Dividers by @saradika-graphics
