Get PowerBombed.

NOTHING IS A SHOOT, EVERYTHING IS KAYFABE.

[madpowerbomber]

[madpowerbomber]

Listen to Get PowerBombed V4.001 by MadPowerBomber #np on #SoundCloud

[madpowerbomber]

3.1 billion.

That's how much it costs your shareholders when you only listen to your own greed, your own company men, and constantly treat your consumer base and the entirety of the Star Wars community and Fandom as something you just stepped in and need to wipe off the bottom of your shoe.

That's what happens when you constantly pretend that games are getting too expensive to make but keep taking in record profits year after year after year for essentially the same re-hashed bullshit over and over again (Battlefield? FIFA? Madden? Really?) and adopt mobile game business models ontop of a game that already costs 59.99 in the US.

That's what happens when you force a dev studio to put multiplayer into a game that doesn't need it (Dead Space 2) then force them to take a more action oriented route with online co-op that no one wanted (Dead Space 3) that sales less than the original game in the series did, call the series a critical failure and force the studio to shit out another installment of your annual franchise (Battlefield Hardline) before presenting them an opportunity to work with Amy Hennig. Then turning around and saying that the "gamers" you tested their work with had no interest in a linear, cinematic single player game and the market just isn't there for it anymore cancelling the game and killing the entire studio.

That's what happens when you fuck up Star Wars twice.

And because EA like most big publishers do look at gamers with such disdain despite them being their only audience, they never saw this coming. They should have. But their own egos and thought process of, THEY'LL BUY IT ANYWAY wouldn't allow them to.

Now EA is backed into a hole they cannot get themselves out of. The game isn't selling at all what they thought it was going to be, which is pretty shitty considering they were banking on it to be a mega seller which is why they released it about a month before The Last Jedi, they've pissed off a whole lot of Star Wars fans and pretty much every gamer that actually cares about gaming and the future of gaming, they've involved government agencies (something that hasn't happened since 1994), and they fucking angered the Mouse by associating Disney and Star Wars with gambling.

I don't see EA recovering from this. They won't regain gamer's trust after this, most certainly not with their Destiny knock off that we can now safely assume was going to be lootbox heavy with random payouts, and they have no real Star Wars games on the horizon at this point with the exception of the Stig Asmussen/Respawn game that seems relatively unharmed from their NO MORE SINGLE PLAYER GAMES as they were courting to buy Respawn as a studio. I don't see their relationship with Disney and Lucasfilm being on good terms for the foreseeable future and I don't see them recovering that 3.1 billion for their shareholders for a long, long time.

However, unlike comics, video games aren't reliant on only two publishers (Marvel and DC), and an unhealthy EA is but a symptom of an unhealthy set of practices in gaming that other publishers can learn from and stop doing immediately, make a quick turn, and avoid this sort of thing in the future. Games aren't getting more expensive to develop for AAA publishers, but that's what they want us to believe. They want us to believe that, they want us to believe that they're hurting for cash, because it's much easier to play the victim in this sort of scenario than to, y'know, admit they're making profits hand over fist - which they boast about once or twice a year. Especially Activision, usually the week after Call of Duty comes out. They also don't want to admit that they schedule games incorrectly, market them incorrectly, sometimes market them to fail for whatever reason, all because these AAA publishers are pretty shitty places with shitty business practices and shitty people behind them. If EA goes under or has to reduce themselves back to just being the "sports guys" it won't hurt the entire industry and most gamer's will be thankful for it.

3.1 billion.

That's the cost of millions of 🖕s.

[jillsteinfuneralcity]

my rig

[topgunhat-deactivated20191021]

*presses the power button and it bursts into flames*

[madpowerbomber]

[madpowerbomber]

Meet Tarz the Obvious. He likes to tell jokes and then proceeds to explain the jokes to you after he tells them. So thoughtful. He was a level 48 Captain that appeared on the battlefield after one of my captains succeeded in proving his worth and becoming a Warchief for the opposing team (hell yeah!) And so when I confronted him I had to shame him, cuz I'm still at level 42. Well, he went maniacal and jumped to level 65. As a result i assigned three of my best captains to take him down: Muzu the Alchemist, Bubol the Puppet Master, and Flak the Alchemist and I'm about to join the battle to see what happens!

[madpowerbomber]

I’m in Act IV of the game and I had to defend against the first seige and I got slaughtered. Bad. They kidnapped my Overlord, Narug the Tower (remember him?) so I had to go save him, well I got jumped by another captain and got killed there when I, for only the third time in the game, but the wrong button during the quick time. Narug got killed as well. I was sad and angry and immediately went after the bastard that killed him.

I caught up to the guy and, well, I got jumped by Narug who had escaped death and betrayed me at the same time! I broke him down and I dominated him again and now he’s my best friendo again!

This all happened in the span of like thirty minutes. Ha!

[madpowerbomber]

Nazu Scar-Artist here is what happens when an Orc captain goes maniacal. I met Nazu a few nights ago and thought his resemblance to Victor Zsasz from Batman was pretty funny and then went about my business. I came back to the area he was in and he was the only Orc left standing that wasn't a part of Team MPB, so I had to take him down. Well, I went after him and some how his followers managed to mess me up bad enough to allow him to drop me with a single spear shot. I missed the button prompt again. That's twice in this game where missing the button prompt as come back to bite me in the ass. I don't remember what level he was at when he killed me, but after he was level 36, which was either the same as me or one or two levels ahead of me. When I caught up to him the second time it turns out that he was pretty flammable and terrified of being pinned, which would leave him dazed and all his immunities would drop. I took him down pretty fast and I couldn't recruit him because he was either a higher level or he had Iron Will, but I don't remember which, all I remember is that I shamed him, he stood back and screeched at me, and then he ran off. All the game told me was that he "leveled down". I am apparently at the point in the game where the names of the deranged, ruined, and maniacal don't change and some times the game won't even tell you it's happened. Because it was a strange interaction I knew something was off and got curious. I immediately hunted him down a third time and that is what I found. He's gone maniacal, earned 26 levels instead of losing any, and now screeched at me like a goddamned banshee.

[madpowerbomber]

Ugh. I have learned that going back to tell the stories of dead orcs that I haven't or forgot to screen cap is pretty difficult. As you're messing around in one area, time passes in another and their corpses will disappear and will be replaced. I'm gonna start screen capping all the orcs.

[madpowerbomber]

This is Tarz the Machine. The Machine is an Orc Capitan I split in half at the very beginning of the game when he was a mere level five. I went back to the First area of the game this evening and he ambushed me, stiches back together with a metal claw and a metal peg leg and was now at level 35. He killed me instantly cuz I was not at all prepared for that. I hunted him down and shamed him down to a 32 or 31 and got out of there to go back to what I was doing the previous night... ...and the bastard followed me to the other area and killed me again, putting himself up at 37. This proceeded to go back and forth for a while. I shamed him down to 27, he got back up to 33 eventually, I believe. I found him again while hunting another captain and shamed him down to 26 before he got into it with one of my other Capitans. I decided to provide some support for my Capitan and did a single Shadow Strike and he dropped to his knees, tried to tell me that machines eventually devour men, and I cut his other arm and leg off before stabbing him in the midsection. He hasn't showed up since. Also, in the story, there's an Orc necromancer named Zog, he's the one responsible for these fuckers not dying. Lol.

[madpowerbomber]

Today I just have one Orc, there were a lot more last night that did some crazy shit, but I forgot to screen cap them for one reason or another. But this is Ushak the Terror. Now Ushak started out as just a regular old captain that I dominated and made one of my own captains until I killed his Blood Brother then he betrayed me and adapted with Iron Will, which means I couldn't ever dominate him again. Which means he had to die. So I found him again and shamed him, cuz that's always fun, found him a second time and cut the bastard in half. Done deal! This was days ago, by the way. I never though about him again. He was dead. I went back to a previous area and went through the process of dominating every Orc in that area, or killing the ones that just needed to die. I think I got them all except two or three spaces not bad, this was all last night. I go back to the previous area where Ushak was and see a Troll that's there that looks neat and decide I want him in my army. So I go and I dominate him and just after I dominate him, Ushak shows up cusses me out, and I whip his ass, but I forgot that he has Iron Will so I shame him. Well, turns out he's also Blood Brothers with that troll I just turned so the troll turns against me and attacks me. I end up killing the troll and going after Ushak and when I find him, something happened and the bastard killed me. I hunted him down again and finally killed him, but that's his story. Ha. I'll have more tonight after the TLC PPV, cuz I found an Orc necromancer that's badass and had another horrible betrayal that I might have already killed but I can still tell his story.

[madpowerbomber]

I haven't orc'd in a couple of days but I saw the picture on the right and suddenly everything in the universe made sense. 😂😂😂

[madpowerbomber]

I got so caught up in enjoying the game that I only now, 30 hours or so in, started taking screen captures to sort of chronicle my “friendships” with Orcs in Shadow of War. Which is a little shitty, cuz I have had some really wonderful and absolutely frustrating experiences so far; until I hit the 20 hour mark and realized that playing the game on normal was too easy. The Nemesis System is the point of the game, not the story - to me anyway - so I first manipulated the System a little (which I’ll explain in a moment) And then upped it to Nemesis Difficulty where I proceeded to die more in the next ten hours than in the previous twenty. So let’s talk about Orc Friendos up there:

1. Tuka is the most recent one. I went back to a previously completely conquered area that I did on normal difficulty to gather up the remaining collectables before taking any missions on the next area, and I got to one of the elf runes, looked at it, and when I came out of it, Tuka was mauling me with his caragor. I fucked it all up and missed the button prompt and died and little Tuka the Regular Ass Orc Soldier was promoted to Captain with a new title: Tuka Foul-Spawn. But it wasn’t just that! He was congratulated with a shitton of buffs and immunities, is an epic poisonous terror trickster, which isn’t ever a good thing!, and went from level nothing to level 39 instantly. He’s going to be a problem. While I’m at level 32 now, anything higher than I am presents a problem on Nemesis Difficulty.

2. Narug the Tower was a bit of a bastard but he looked like some kind of Orc Cenobite, so I had to have him and he was only at level 24 when I fought him. Took about fifteen minutes or so, but broke him down, dominated him and made him my bodyguard, cuz he’s just a fucking badass. Once I fully conquered the area – which reminds me, I didn’t complete the whole area on Normal, just 90% of it, I had the Seige and the Overlord left when I upped the difficulty – I made him the new Overlord. He’s still only at level 28 and I wish I could take him to the other areas.

3. Pash the Branded was where I tried to manipulate the Nemesis System before I changed the difficulty. I intentionally found a group of Orc slaves and let them kill me because I wanted to see of the slaves could be promoted. Pash is the result. Yes they can be promoted, and promoted he was. He went to being what he is in that picture and then I went and found him again, let him kill me again, and he was promoted to Warchief. From slave to Warchief, which was kinda neat.

4. Gluk the Unashamed was a Warchief that was a higher level than I was so when I fought him I couldn’t dominate him, I had to shame him instead. So I did that and then I hunted him down to dominate him to make him a part of Team MPB so we couple PowerBomb Sauron as one! Or some shit. When I found him he looked like this. I don’t remember if his level actually dropped, perhaps it did, but I don’t think it actually happened, but what I do remember is that he took the brand – Talion burns his hand into the face of the Orcs he dominates – and made it his own, painting it all over his body, and was stronger than he was when I first faced him in terms of powers, abilities, and buffs. He also became a cursed terror beast master, which he wasn’t before I don’t thinl, which my then body guard was terrified of and took off running at the mere sight of him. I fought Gluk many times and I never decapitated him to kill him perminantly, but he hasn’t shown up again for a very long time.

I’m about to enter another area I just dominated to collect collectables and whatnot before venturing off into a completely new area where all I’ve done is sync the Haedir and gathered Intel on all the Captains.

More to come!

[pkpaulshow]

[doublearrows]

[madpowerbomber]

B For Beelzebub.

A knock came to the door around 5:00pm. It wasn’t a pleasant knock, not the short tap-tap sort of knock that would come from a friend or a relative before they entered your home. No, it was more of a booming bang bang bang, let me in or I’ll huff and puff and blow your house down sort of a knock. And when the middle-aged man with the glasses with the thick lenses opened his front door he saw nothing. Just the usual view of his bastard neighbor who always threw some sort of party every Sunday for that bastard game of football. Superbowl Sunday was an absolute nightmare for him. Hm, he thought to himself as he glanced back and forth. Crazy kids these days. “Down here,” a raspy voice said. The man looked down and felt his stomach clench tightly around itself and the back of his throat gag. It was a two-foot tall fly-looking man of a thing with big, bulging red eyes, small little fly-wings that flapped irritatingly now and then, four arms and two legs. Two very tiny legs. And thick little hairs sprouted from every inch of its body. “Jesus!” the man said. “No,” answered the fly-thing, “Beelzebub.” “Beelzewhat?” “Bub.” “What kinda name is that?” “The name I was given, sir.” “What are you?” “Ah, forgive me,” the fly-thing bowed. “Beelzebub, The Lord of the Flies, at your service.” “Lord of the what?” “Flies.” “Why would anyone wanna be a lord of flies?” “I didn’t ask for the job.” “You didn’t?” “No sir, I did not,” its wings buzzed and its voice grew harsher. “How’d you get it, then?” “God gave it to me.” “God gave it to you?” “God gave it to me.” “Why did God give it to you?” “Something to do with Satan and Lucifer and a bunch of other angel types, all a misunderstanding, really.” The man stood, stunned in half awe and half in disgust at the fly-thing standing before him. It moved forward a little in a jerky movement as though its entire body moved all at once; nothing was separate. “Look,” it started, “I’m sort of hiding out from a couple of friends. Would you mind if I dropped in for a few hours and get a bite to eat?” “Ah,” the man said, “well,” his breath labored a little, the fly-thing was making him nauseous. “I don’t see why not…” he said and turned to let the little creature into the living room of his home. He closed the door behind him as they entered. The screams came quickly only to be deafened by an airplane flying overhead at that exact moment. The fly-thing exited the same way it had entered with a white cloth in its fingerless hand and wiped the edges of its tube shaped and lipless mouth. It let out a loud belch as it made its way down the street towards the next house.

© 2017, Dameyon Moore. :B

[madpowerbomber]

Due to unforseen circumstances this was all I was able to do for the month of June. The Summer of Completion hit some bad road.

[madpowerbomber]

The Summer of Completion Part III

So far this project has just been all over the place. I started with a schedule, then just tossed it out the window to Platinum Tekken 7, which was entirely unexpected on my part. Then I jumped over to the PlayStation 3 to finish up what I need to for the Lego Batman 3 platinum, and I got bored with it after getting just two trophies of the twelve that I need. Sometimes doing the Gold Brick and Character round-ups in those games can just seem really daunting. Of course getting sick from food at work and then a subsequent migraine two days later didn't help all that much. The trophies I need now are: Bat's All, Folks; An Unearthly Likeness; Beings From the 5th Dimension; Doughnut Discoverer; Glide on Time, Intruder Alert Intruder Alert!; Krypto Come Home (DLC); Loontern's Space Race; Super Pets; and The Bright Night. It's not that many at all, really, and I could proabably do it in a single sitting, but the problem now however is that I've gone back to playing Attack On Titan and trying to do some trophy clean up over there having FINALLY finished all the main storyline missions in the game. Which took a lot longer than I thought it would, honestly. And then I unlocked True Attack Mode for the game, which I honestly believe to be the most difficult thing I've ever played in my life. Yes, including those pesky Dark Souls games and those Ninja Gaiden games before they added easier difficulties and all that nonsense. The resources you get in Attack on Titan -- the gas and the blades -- are much more limited and run out a lot faster, and the Titans take fuckall in terms of damage. I got to the very first Titan you fight in the game, and burnt through all the gas and was on the last section of the blade, and hadn't done dick in terms of damage on the monster. Then it ate me. THIS IS THE FIRST FIGHT OF THE GAME! So that's a whole lot of nope going on in that game. I hope you don't have to beat True Attack Mode to get the platinum trophy for it, cuz that ain't ever going to happen for me. Haha. I still need seven trophies to platinum the game, which isn' that much really. But with Attack on Titan being a musou game -- i.e. Dynasty Warriors game -- it's gonna take a lot of time and effort. At least I can tell what's going on in this game versus the first three Dynasty Warriors: GUNDAM games and some of the weird things they got going on in them that makes no sense whatsoever. Like DWGunam 2's friendship thinger. I never knew how to make people my friends and whatnot, and the rophy was to get everyone to be your friend in the game. That's insane. So we're in the middle of June and I've completed one game so far. That's garbage. Ha.

[llttlemermaid]

boys who can pull off facial hair are hot

[meladoodle]

i think you’re supposed to use a razor