Magennta09 @magennta097 - Tumblr Blog

Time Undone Ch. 10

Caleb x MC

Caleb is dead for the second time. The Evol extraction project on corpses is underway, and his body is Ever's prime subject.

MC, who returns to Skyhaven after four years to help Welkin Funeral Home, has to get him back—while her life is at stake. Then an anomaly throws her back in time, to the post-graduation summer when Caleb is still alive.

She will save him this time, whatever it takes.

*New chapter will be updated every Thursday/Friday depending on your time zone.*

Chapters: CH 1 | CH 2 | CH 3 | CH 4 | CH 5 | CH 6 | CH 7 | CH 8 | CH 9 | CH 10

Tags: time travel, human experimentation, forbidden love, pseudocest, BDSM, usage of gege as a kink but more importantly as a source of stress, boundaries what boundaries, codependency, anxiety, depression, suicide attempt, suicidal thoughts, self-harm, food as a love language, no beta we die like Josephine, except she's alive again here because we're back in the past, nonconsensual touching, not between Caleb and MC, gore, major character death, praise kink, grief

Total Words: TBA | Chapter Words: 7.1k

Masterlist | Read on AO3

In the crack of dawn, the emptiness she ordinarily felt after a good lay didn’t bear down on her. She was more herself than she’d been in a long time. Caleb had folded life into her.

There was a slight curl to the lashes that rested on his cheeks, long and natural. His right arm beneath her too was natural. The firmness, the little twitches, the pronounced veins over the biceps.

If she opened up his brain and tore him into pieces, he would spurt out flesh and blood. Needn’t have to worry about wires short-circuiting from impact or salt water. She never asked Caleb how it felt to have his future wrenched away from him. How he’d coped in the period he was pretending to be dead. He’d had a whole life ahead of him.

Let him sleep a little longer. This was the most rest he would get before work started. Then he’d be constantly traversing the Deepspace and sitting in the long stretches of darkness and silence alone.

It must have been jarring to go from protecting the Earth to rounding up its occupants for unethical experiments. Did it hurt his conscience? Had he ever regretted surviving the explosion the way she regretted not being inside the house so it could take her out along with him and Grandma?

Now Caleb would never understand that pain. It was a pivotal part of their lives that nobody but her would withstand. A small blessing.

She kissed his bicep, and he slung his other arm over her. This was what she used to wish for him. To be fully himself with the right to feel and think.

The loss and torture awaiting him in the future would not come.

A hand squeezed her bare bottom. Caleb’s eyes were closed, but he had a serene smile on his lips. She planted a kiss before resting her head on his clothed chest.

Fuck his clothes.

“Take this off,” she grumbled. “I want to feel you too.”

A throaty chuckle bubbled up from him, low and delicious. “You’re up before me.”

“Did you not hear me?”

Caleb looked at her fondly and tugged it over his head. “Better?”

Tentatively, her hands roamed over him. This was finally allowed. Nobody could fault her if she burst into tears right here.

She pulled herself up and trailed kisses over his abs. Caleb sat against the wall, petting her head but not telling her to stop. After leaving a bite near his nipple that made him groan, she came back up and hugged him, pressing their bodies together.

The feel of his skin on hers. Now warm, now alive. Not slick with stasis fluid, these limbs were coordinated by a living person. Her gege was healthy and holding her the way she once believed it could never be.

“You’re thinking of something, aren’t you?” Caleb said. “What is it? Tell Gege.”

She let out a mewl to delay answering. This kind of childish noise was reserved for him. Something about him made her feel like a safe, guarded child. She could whine or wail about anything, and he’d take her in his arms to cajole her.

“It’ll be on your mind for days if you don’t share it with me, and then we won’t be able to enjoy our time together. I do get worried when you’re worried, you know.”

“That’s the one thing that defines Caleb, if nothing else.”

“So you can make us both feel better by sharing. I promise not to judge.”

She traced his right shoulder down to his fingertips. “You lost your arm in the explosion. It was replaced with a bionic limb. Sometimes it put you in deep pain, and you couldn’t feel me anymore.”

Caleb’s hand clenched. “Always?”

“You could sense pain, but I hate inflicting it on you.” She’d inflicted too much on him that the novelty had worn off. Pain was all she could give him.

“I’d rather feel hurt than nothing from you.”

“Don’t.” She pulled back and stared down, unable to look into his eyes. The skin on his arm had a warm, well-circulated tint of blood. “You damaged it once while grabbing me back before a car could hit me. I wasn’t looking at the road.” She was such a problem for him. “I miss your hand. Your hand was so cold.” From the metal, from algor mortis.

Caleb pressed it against her face. “It’s warm now. And look, I can feel every part of you just fine.” He moved down to grope her breast before suddenly jerking away.

There were purple fingerprints on her skin. She couldn’t contain her smile. “Pretty.” At his silence, she said, “What? They are. It’s proof that last night was real. We did all that.”

Caleb massaged the bruises. “Are you sure it’s not too much?”

She rolled her eyes. “I don’t want to do this anymore if you keep doubting me.” There was no fun in being with someone who couldn’t commit to indulging her masochistic taste.

He said that, but now he flicked her forehead. “Stop thinking about leaving.”

“Then stop worrying about what I can take.” She bit his finger, then felt herself shrinking back into her shell. Perhaps it was too much for him, but he couldn’t admit it for her sake. She’d pushed too far again. “Do you not like it?” She didn’t think she could stand knowing that he regretted being rough with her. She couldn’t stand losing it after having the privilege to experience it. “I didn’t mean what I said. I don’t want you to leave. I want to keep being with you. Please don’t stop doing this.”

Caleb’s eyes bulged in alarm, and he kissed her, his hand stroking her hair. “Don’t be scared, I’m not going anywhere. I was just surprised. I never thought I could actually hurt you like this.”

“You said you fantasised about it.”

“I never thought it’d be real.”

“But you don’t regret anything?”

“I regret not doing this sooner.” Caleb took her nipple to his mouth and gently sucked it until her body relaxed once more. “I want you, okay? I won’t leave. I’ll keep reminding you if you forget.”

And remind her he did.

She’d been wrong in thinking Caleb had no boundaries. With the new unlimited access to her body, he conducted himself without restraint. His hand was always on her waist or the small of her back or her knee below the tablecloth. Her house lockdown punishment was thoroughly enjoyable.

He took the secrecy around their relationship as a challenge. He’d sweep her up against the staircase wall and pleasure her while the picture frames rattled around them. She’d push his hand off her thigh when they were at a dining table with Grandma, and he’d drop his fork and trace her calf as he picked it up.

He promised he’d stop if he inspected her and found her dry. She never was.

Desire was more powerful than guilt. She could feel dirty for being turned on in front of a family member, but Caleb could cleanse her conscience with his tongue inside her.

Caleb’s self-control was more powerful than desire. He always limited her explorative touch to palming outside his trousers and kitten bites on his Adam’s apple.

She was careful. She didn’t leave lasting marks. He wasn’t. He was obsessed with renewing the fingerprint bruises on her breasts and arse. She took pictures and sent them to him when he was out one day, and he locked her with him when he returned. His focus was always on her, while she had to fight to get a taste of him.

When they were alone, she wasn’t allowed to wear anything. She liked how it got him hard and helped her familiarise herself in this new body. No longer did she find the parameters he set for her suffocating, she was relieved from not having to plan her next moves continuously.

Caleb utilised this revelation. He gave her more rules that she enthusiastically stuck with. If he wanted to eat her out while she was playing on her console, she had to let him without pausing the game. If she wore her underwear while he was around, he’d bend her over and spank her until she was all red and warm.

Sometimes it ended with tears in her eyes, but always she turned over with a wobbly smile on. The best part was when he soothed her bottom and whispered sweet nothings. He was her gege, and a gege took care of his meimei.

They learned how to circumvent Grandma’s presence, skipped the floorboards that creaked to sneak into each other’s room at night and took over all the house chores so Grandma could hang out with her friends. Her chores were mostly being pretty, tempting, and accessible. The easiest job she’d ever done.

A week later, her grounding came to an end. Her arm had healed enough that they could visit a photo studio at the other end of Linkon. It’d been her idea, so Caleb thought she’d be excited, but she was privately fretting over being found out.

With his tongue and fingers, he managed to get it out of her through her post-orgasm haze. He reassured her that he wouldn’t do anything untoward, as though he was the one struggling to compose himself in public.

Being with Caleb had unlocked a deluge of desire. When she clung to his hand, it was more than a simple hand-holding. She wanted to memorise the roughness of his skin from handling the cockpit’s controls, the way his fingers curled inside her. She wanted to steal as many moments as she could before she lost him again.

The deeper she found herself in this whirlwind of new experiences and emotions, the more intense her fear became. She couldn’t go back to how things were when he was dead. Windows to regret were many, and she had to lock them before they could open.

But now, she had to keep a tight rein over her anxiety before Caleb decided it was better to break things off for her own good. She doubted he’d actually do it, but it was better not to test the theory.

In the self-service studio, she dressed herself in layers of embroidered turquoise cloths that flowed when she twirled. She was taking some test shots, trying to cover her modern shoes with the dress and robe when the door opened.

The Farspace Fleet Colonel sauntered to her with a smile, and her gut dropped. For a split second, she thought Caleb had been subjected to the same fate again.

But the embroidery on his suit was frayed, and the fabric looked coarse. A costume, nothing more.

He tipped his cap. “How do I look—” Words died on his lips as he gawked at her. “Wow, you—wow. You’re the prettiest fairy I’ve ever seen.” His hand glided over her silken fabric. Beneath her shock, she was proud of the reaction she could pull from him.

She offered a hesitant smile. “Thank you.”

“What’s wrong?”

Caleb’s attentiveness could be a curse. “You’re a colonel,” she managed to say.

“You don’t like it? I thought I should give it a shot since you said I’ll become one in the future.”

It was her fault for not sharing the whole thing with him. “Your colonel life wasn’t great. You hated it too. The environment was hostile. Your own officers wanted you dead.” She took the suit and tie off him the way she did in the Fleet’s infirmary bed. Some of her memories from the self-injected Toring Chip period had trickled back. “I hated the person you were in that uniform. I wanted this Caleb back. Don’t you go from me now.”

He kicked the suit aside and hugged her. “Sorry. I’m not going anywhere. You can feel me, see?”

She tightened her arms around him. “Wear something that matches my era. Don’t you want to be with me in every lifetime?”

“You couldn’t decide between the qipao and hanfu.”

She landed a series of pokes on his waist. “How does that relate to the colonel?”

Caleb dodged her attacks. “I was curious about the future.”

The tension in her shoulders loosened. The future could be an enticing thing to discover. If their roles were reversed, the universe knew how determined she’d be in getting the truth out of him. “I get it, but let’s leave that in my timeline. Your future can be better now.”

He peeked at the see-through glass on the door before kissing her. “Understood, Your Highness. I’ll be back as a prince ready to sweep you off your feet.”

“You’re handsome in this, by the way. You’re handsome in everything and nothing, though I haven’t witnessed the latter.” Her hands went south to squeeze his arse. “It’s not fair that I always have to be naked and you don’t.”

Caleb ground his hips against her. “I’m your gege. The older one gets extra privileges.”

“Technically, I’m five years older than you.”

“Five?” He moved her backwards, scanning for the evidence of age that wasn’t there. _“_You’re supposed to be three years younger than me!”

“And you’re supposed to be dead.” She folded her arms, smug. “Call me jiejie from now on.”

Understanding dawned on Caleb, and he scoffed. “Nope, your ploy won’t work. You’ll always be my meimei.”

“Accept the facts, my dear didi.”

He looked so offended by the younger brother label that she had to laugh. He left a quick peck on her cheek before saluting and marching out with an exaggerated robotic movement.

Classic Caleb, running away to avoid a losing argument.

He came back minutes later with translucent fabric flowing behind him. The matching green hanfu was secured neatly with a sash. Impressive how fast it took him to get into the outfit without help, whereas she had to tackle one too many ribbons. This studio could use a human stylist.

Or not. Her ethereal Caleb was exclusive for her eyes.

She squealed and jumped into his arms, and he spun her with a huge grin. “You can’t do this to me. You’re too attractive. I wish they had the appropriate wigs though. You’d look good with long hair.”

“I can grow it out for you,” Caleb said, completely serious.

“That’d take too long. I have another idea: what do you think about being shaved bald in sleep?” she said, even more serious.

“What do you think about being grounded a little longer?”

She thumped his arm. “Acceptable as long as I get to have sex with you.”

“Resonate with me.”

She clasped his hand and activated her Evol. It felt more robust compared to the early recovery days, but when it reached her palm, it coiled, yellow blooming out then fizzing into nothing. The second and third attempts were the same.

She glowered at Caleb and shoved her hands behind her back. He tickled them with the hand around her waist.

“I’ll fuck you once your resonance is steady, okay?” he said in a gentle, coaxing tone. “Nerve recovery is a good indicator that your bones are fully mended.”

“I must not be tempting enough if you can still hold back,” she groused.

“Nice, your creativity survived the accident.”

“Not all of it. Can’t imagine you fucking me from behind. I need a live demonstration.”

His head tilted. “Do you want that to be our first position?”

“Anything is fine. I just want you inside me.”

Caleb patted her head. “I know.” He carried her to the front of camera and sat on the stool with her in his lap. “Come on. The timer is counting down.”

The first shot was bad. She was throwing daggers at Caleb with her gaze, and the sitting position looked awkward against the nature backdrop.

They stood up and tried a couple more poses, laughing when they almost tripped on each other’s garments in their hurry. In some of the shots, Caleb levitated her and added a wind effect with his Evol. She quite liked seeing herself floating between mountains. In others, they brandished plastic swords and parried with each other at an animated palace.

“We should do something more romantic,” suggested Caleb before flying her into his grasp.

He dipped her as though they were dancing and kissed her in the end. She laid a hand on his chest and rested her head there while smirking at the camera.

High from excitement, she skipped to the printing device for their pictures and fluttered them at Caleb. “Our first date picture!”

“This is a date?” She didn’t miss the hopeful note in his voice.

She knew she shouldn’t give him any false hope, but hope was a dogged thing. “What else should we call this if not a date?”

“It’s a date.” Caleb’s smile widened. “Between us, it’s real.”

Hope was also a parasite infecting her. “It’s real.”

He slipped the snapshots into his wallet. “Let’s get out of these costumes. It’s itchy.”

“Really? Mine is soft.”

While she was smoothing out his robe and comparing their garment quality, he linked their arms and piloted her out of the room. They didn’t get far before a cacophony of voices shrieked her name.

It took her a minute to recognise those teenage faces, but when she did, she quickly brushed Caleb’s arm off and stepped aside.

“You liar! You said you didn’t like to come here.” Lucie attacked her with a hug.

Marissa elbowed the others to get to her, crushing her with another pair of arms. “Obviously she didn’t want to tell you. Look who’s with her.”

Caleb allowed a couple of seconds to pass before extracting her from them. “Don’t squeeze her too hard. She’s not a plushie.” He studied her forearm. “Does it hurt?”

She shook her head in a daze. They’d gone out of their way to avoid their usual routes, but they’d somehow bumped into her high school friends, most of whom she couldn’t recall. She remembered they liked to gossip though, and news spread fast in their neighbourhood, so they had to get out of these matching outfits before a rumour could start.

“Ge, how did you get so tall?” Lucie asked.

“Blessed with good genes, obviously,” said Marissa.

“I have to help my meimei reach the highest shelves.” Caleb winked at her. He was playing the role better than her. “What theme are you guys planning to do?”

“We’re freestyling. Anyone can wear anything. Go crazy, you know? One last photoshoot before everyone goes their own way.”

They fell into a hush, looking at each other and chuckling uncertainly. Lucie said, “We would’ve invited you. It’s just that—”

“You’re always studying or busy doing something—” added Marissa.

“You would’ve turned us down anyway, right? Your ge is here. You disappear when he visits. That’s like, your routine.”

“You never let him join us either.” Marissa poked her shoulder. “Your ge is so nice. You should share him with us sometimes.”

Nothing had changed.

She inched towards Caleb and smiled. “It’s okay, I get it. You go have fun.”

“I knew you’d be understanding.” Lucie sighed in relief.

Marissa craned her neck at the rest of the group crowding the catalogue album. “Actually, Delia couldn’t come, so there’s a spot for you. What do you say, a second round of photoshoot?”

Her smile dried at the thought of being a seat filler. “I’m tired. We’ve already been out the whole day. I need to change.”

Lucie gasped and would have grabbed her again if it weren’t for Caleb’s arm shooting out to shield her. He still seemed friendly, but his smile had stopped reaching his eyes.

“Oh no, I’m sorry. Is it your heart?” Lucie said.

“I think so, but it’s not a big deal,” she lied. Dimly she wondered if her time travel complication had somehow altered her Aether Core and therefore her heart. No problems related to it had arisen lately.

Lucie squeezed Caleb’s arm, her tone teasing. “With Caleb Ge, nothing is a big deal for you.”

“But this one is. You heard her. We need to go.” Caleb shrugged the pesky hand off and herded his actual meimei to the changing area.

The change was fast since she’d worn the hanfu over her clothes. Should she rejoice that she at least got a pity invite this time around? It was coming back to her, how she’d cried after seeing their posted session. Every girl in the class had been present except her, beaming with their arms around each other. Caleb had blocked their accounts for her. Out of sight, out of mind, he’d said.

Caleb couldn’t be more wrong.

She didn’t get why her chest felt tight, why a simple exchange with the people she didn’t talk to anymore could make her feel like a teenager standing alone in the gym again because no one would pick her.

They weren’t bullies. They did try to include her when they went out, but her chief interest had been going home to play with Caleb, conduct a video call with Caleb, or study to break Caleb’s records. No one would want to try forever for someone who didn’t care.

She waited in front of his cubicle. She needed him then, she needed him now. He’d know how to make her feel better. He could take her mind off it so she didn’t have to be sad. When she had sex, emotions were a distant thing.

He was taking too long.

She rapped on his door until it opened. She’d love to walk him backwards and drop to her knees right there, but her friends would get suspicious.

Caleb was concerned. “Did they bully you?”

“What? No. Just hurry. I want to go home.”

Her eyes kept wandering to the girls, pressing on an open wound to test how much blood would spill. They were helping each other choose their costumes while promising to keep in touch after they split up. It must be nice to have a group of trusted people to rely on. At least they wouldn’t be alone when one person wasn’t available.

If she’d been a better friend, she could have had a lasting friendship too. Someone to call at midnight when she was drowning in grief, or someone to reminisce about her high school time with. Caleb had been up to date with most things, but he wasn’t her classmate. She’d never experienced giggling with her friends in class while trying not to get caught by the teacher. She was a studious bore that people couldn’t have fun with.

She hadn’t been great at making friends at workplaces either. Apparently she expected people to go out of their way to befriend her while she did the bare minimum, sometimes not even that.

She wanted to tell the girls that the connection forged in school wouldn’t last. Everyone would be too busy to live their own lives, especially when marriage and babies came knocking on their doors.

But what did she know? Theirs could last. Some of her colleagues still regularly hung out with their school friends.

She didn’t have a strong predecessor to compare a friendship to. Caleb was an exception, compelled to be with her due to their bond. Best not to say anything.

He combed his hair in the mirror. “They’re so noisy,” he said with distaste.

She smoothed out the strands that stood out at the back. “I talk a lot too.”

“I like the noises you make.”

“Glad you do.”

He was probably expecting more, but she couldn’t put herself in the mood for sexual innuendos.

He gave a slow nod. “Let’s go.”

They waited until most of the group flocked into one of the rooms. But when they were about to walk out, someone seized Caleb’s arm.

“Wait!” Lucie balanced herself on the steps outside. “Can I have your number? I might need some advice for college.”

Her instinct was to turn her down on his stead. He already had her; she didn’t need to come up with excuses to thwart off his admirers. She was a legitimate reason for a rejection—

Who was she kidding? She wasn’t.

Nothing about their romantic relationship was legitimate. Even the lie they’d so wanted to claim was off the table. These people had grown up with them and known them as siblings. The particulars didn’t matter when the scandal would be more sensational than the truth.

Caleb positioned himself behind her when the pedestrian kept bumping into her. “Are you going to the Aerospace Academy?” He sounded neutral. She didn’t dare to see his expression.

“Fine arts in Linkon University!”

“I heard Hyunki is also planning to study that. Why don’t you ask him?”

“You know Hyunki?” Lucie squealed and faced her. “Did you go on a date with him? How did it go?”

“Is my date public knowledge?”

“Only the girls know.” So everyone. “He asked Marissa for advice to kiss you, and she asked me for advice to give the perfect advice.”

“And the result of this advice relay?”

“Told him to follow his heart.” She shrugged. “How would we know? You’re so quiet around us.”

“Maybe she’s quiet because you’re not interesting,” Caleb chimed in.

She elbowed him on the ribs. She couldn’t believe he’d dropped his charm for this.

Lucie’s hand holding the phone wavered. “You can try harder, you know.” She laughed. “We’re always here if you need us.”

They were. In the canteen occupying the popular tables, in the class hounding her to let them copy her homework, at the school gate waiting for Caleb to pick her up so they could catch a glimpse of him.

She was expected to try harder for her friends who didn’t reach out when Caleb’s obituary was posted. They wanted him in life but not in death. Why should she put in any effort for them?

“I’ll keep that in mind,” she said.

“You have my number?”

“Yep.” The reverse also applied, but she never heard from Lucie and Marissa after graduation.

“Don’t forget us after you become a Hunter. Love you!”

A girl shouted for Lucie, and she watched her run back inside. She watched herself, the younger and older versions of her, being left behind once more. There was something about her that always failed to keep people around.

She held her head high and walked away without another word. If she couldn’t have friends, she could at least leave with her dignity intact. Caleb walked a step behind her, a guardian guiding her home.

The second they entered the kitchen, she whirled on Caleb. “Can I suck your cock?”

He paused from crossing off the digital grocery list on the fridge. “You said you were tired.”

“It’s therapeutic. It would help me unwind.”

He swiped the screen off. “And how did you figure that out?”

“I have an inkling.”

He rubbed his face. “Do you really want to? After earlier?”

She entwined their fingers. “I always want to.”

He held up their hands and rotated them. “Should we stop holding hands outside?” Caleb asked quietly.

“But I like touching you.”

“It was too much for you.” His expression was pained. “Tell me I’m wrong.”

She scrunched her nose in confusion before it clicked. Her body went cold, and she grasped onto him with more desperation.

“It’s not,” she insisted. “I’m sorry I brushed you off. I’d been thinking too much. We’ve always held hands outside. I don’t want to stop, please.”

She’d been so caught up with her own feelings that she’d denied him in front of everyone, right after assuring him that the date was real. And for whose benefit? Her school friends already knew how close they were.

Her sexual thirst felt cheap now compared to what he’d been bottling up. It was worse that he didn’t call her out. She didn’t deserve his defence.

“Why aren’t you mad at me?” she asked.

“How could I when I got you into this?”

“I got into this with you. I came onto you first.”

Caleb’s thumb caressed the back of her hand. “Do you regret this?”

Tremors spread across her body. “Don’t you dare. We barely started. Today was our first date.” She was a petulant child who couldn’t let go of her possession. He couldn’t leave her after giving her a taste of the life she’d been starving for. It couldn’t have been for nothing. “Don’t end this.”

“It would be easier for you.”

“Do you really want to go back to before we kissed? Is that possible for you? Because I can’t play that game anymore.”

She huffed when the words left her mouth, an echo of what the older Caleb once said. So that was what he meant. She’d been so harsh to him. Too young to understand him, but stupid enough to be considerate.

The latter still held true.

Caleb held her cheek. “I want you to be happy.”

“I am. I’m the happiest when I’m with you,” she said. “But you’re not. And it’s because of me that you’re not.”

“This is the happiest I’ve ever been. Don’t doubt my feelings.”

She choked out a mocking laugh and hit him lightly. “The happiest you are is when I hurt you. What is wrong with you?”

“I wouldn’t be here with you if nothing was wrong with me.”

“Your joke preference is awful.”

Caleb shrugged. “It’s the truth. No perfectly right gege would do this to his meimei.” He wrapped her legs around him and sat her on the worktop. “Kiss me.”

She blinked, not following his line of thought. He snuggled her cheek and waited.

Cautiously, she gave him a light kiss there. His lips were a gift she hadn’t earned. She wouldn’t take advantage of his kindness.

He touched the spot. “Is that all?”

She wanted to shrivel into herself and disappear somewhere no one could bring her back from. Caleb never had to verbalise his disappointment in her; she’d honed herself to be his personal mood detector. Today marked the most disappointment points she’d racked up in a day.

He caught her chin. “Stop thinking.” He kissed her full on the mouth and smiled. “See? That’s how easy you can reset my mood.”

She hated that smile. She couldn’t bear Caleb’s fucked up method. She was the one who hurt him, but he took the role of consoling her. He’d raised her to be better than this.

She got down to her knees and undid his jeans. Make amends, she had to. Caleb stumbled back before trying to drag her back up, but she dug her legs into the cold kitchen tiles.

He seized her wrist. “What are you doing?”

“I have a more effective way to reset your mood.”

She needed the closeness of his flesh joining hers. Take him in. Lose herself in him. The world might not allow him to be hers, but she and Caleb knew the truth. She needed to show him she knew.

“This isn’t the right time.”

“Grandma isn’t home. No better time than now.” Caleb was tugging at her elbow again, so she clung to his legs with all her might. “Please, let me do this. Didn’t you instruct me to make up for my mistakes back then? I can make you feel better like this, and I’ll feel better too,” she said. “It won’t lead to sex, I promise.”

“That’s not the problem.”

“I won’t use my left hand.”

He sighed. “Please, get up. Don’t try to be funny.”

Unless she missed out on a genital-chomping joke, there was nothing funny about giving him head. “Why are you so against oral? You’ve done it to me every day. I want to try it too.”

“You copycat, always following what I do.”

She stared up at him with big eyes. “I have to be like my gege because Gege is the best in this world.”

His ears coloured, and it took him a lot of effort to say, “I don’t want this to be my first time coming with you.”

“We can have multiple firsts. This is from a blowjob, and when we can have sex, that will count as the first time from penetration.”

Caleb’s fingers were white from gripping the edge of the worktop.

“We can stop if you don’t like it.” His resolve was crumbling. She could see it in the way his gaze moved from the clock to the clear windows. “Gege, please?”

His eyes were closed for several seconds. “All right, all right.” The blinds shuttered, leaving orange rays filtering through the gaps. “Are you comfortable down there?”

She was more comfortable at his feet than acting like she had the right to strut around without a fault.

She nodded and pulled down his jeans and boxers. As a teen, she often tried to sneak a peek when Caleb was wearing loose, airy shorts. It felt surreal that his cock was within reach now, and he was letting her reach it. He wasn’t denying her of him.

She licked the glistening tip and heard a low gasp. Using her tongue, she worked from the base to the top until Caleb was visibly impatient for more.

She closed her mouth around him and bobbed her head. The salty musk invaded her senses, the fullness of his girth leaving her mind with nowhere to go. She could bring him to new heights. He wouldn’t leave her like the rest.

Caleb twitched inside her mouth, grunts occasionally slipping out of him. She guided his hand to the back of her head, urging him to push, but he petted her softly instead.

It almost made her sob.

She threw herself into servicing him, twisting her wrist as her hand glided along the length that her mouth couldn’t reach. He deserved it. Her friends could leave her out. That wasn’t a problem anymore. She could always crawl back to Caleb. He was always there.

This was her gratitude. She shouldn’t have thought of seeking friendship in those girls. Caleb offered her everything. They belonged together.

She’d be better for him. She swore it with every action she was doing to him.

She retracted her head when his fingers dug into the roots of her hair insistently.

“Should I stop?” She licked her lips. “Is it too much?”

“Don’t stop.” His voice came out in a rough whisper.

“You can use my mouth however you want. I like that.”

So Caleb pushed her head deeper.

His cock hit the back of her throat. It excited her as much as it surprised her. This body’s instinct was to gag and push him off, but she moved past the sensation and opened up her throat, taking him in. She couldn’t take the whole length, but she’d try. She’d try hard for him.

Her breath thinned. The less air she got, the less space she had to think. She was breathing, tasting, feeling Caleb. Her hands groped his arse and pulled him closer.

He drew her back. “Don’t—I won’t last long.”

Annoyance flared in her when he took his cock away. “I want you to come,” she said, then went back in.

She intensified her motions until Caleb was tensing and growing more restless. He couldn’t push her away now. The hips that thrust into her were seemingly outside of his control, harder and harder the way he must have wanted it from the beginning. She heard a low thud and glanced up—it was his fist on the worktop behind him.

Caleb was close.

She maintained her pace, making more wet sounds that she knew men liked. Soon enough, he spurted his load into her mouth with a loud grunt. She kept her mouth there, sucking on him softly until he was finished, then sat back on the balls of her feet.

Caleb slumped against the kitchen cabinet. His head was tipped back, the most undone she’d ever seen him.

Relief and giddiness seeped into her. His pleasure finally came first before hers. She wanted him to know how that felt.

And she’d been the one to bring him to climax. He’d relented to her so easily. No one could take off his mask of control like her. Caleb wouldn’t let that happen.

She stood up, her knees wobbling, and he immediately steadied her.

She cupped her hand beneath her open mouth, careful not to spill.

But she couldn’t swallow.

She’d planned to show him proudly that she didn’t waste a drop, but her throat had never agreed with the consistency of semen. The sourness and bitterness, however slight, were too much for her.

If Caleb’s knowledge was exclusively gleaned from porn, he’d expect her to do it without any difficulty. But her expression must have given it away, because he was holding out his palms in front of her.

“Spit it out, it’s fine,” he said.

Her brows furrowed in disbelief. “Disgusting,” she mumbled.

“Why do you always do this? It’s my cum and your saliva. Spit it out unless you want to gargle with it.”

She scrunched her face, and Caleb gave her a reprimanding look.

Eventually, she complied.

Caleb cleaned his hands in the sink on the other side of the kitchen. She had to turn and hit it a few times for the squeaky old thing to work. While she was rinsing her mouth, he prepared a glass of cold water to wash away the taste.

“How do you feel?” she asked after gulping down the whole glass.

He chuckled and shook his head. “You were amazing.”

“Better than your fantasy?”

“Until recently, I didn’t think I could experience any of this, so yep, much better.” Caleb put the glass aside. “How do you feel?”

Like her apology was finally worth accepting.

She slid down to the floor, elongating her legs. Blood flowed back much faster at this age. Her calves weren’t numb at all. Caleb took the place beside her and tipped her head on his shoulder.

“So you’re not ending things with me?” she asked.

“I didn’t hold myself back for years to leave you when things get hard.” He nuzzled her head. “I’m not like your friends. Test me if you don’t believe me. I’ll ace it all.”

She grimaced. Associating Caleb with tests brought her mind to when his corpse was used as a test subject. “The point of my apology is to avoid hurting you even more.”

“Just a heads-up, you don’t have to blow me every time you feel guilty.” His hand crept into her shorts and stroked her core. “I haven’t returned the favour.”

“No need. I’m not in the mood.”

He raised his brows at her, and she shrugged, so he took his hand out. Today’s session was about Caleb. She wouldn’t be able to stand it if he turned it around.

“Have your friends always singled you out?”

She couldn’t bring herself to affirm it.

“You’re better off without them,” Caleb said. “Remember that there is someone here willing to be your everything. I can be an excellent friend.”

“You’re already my gege and lover. Isn’t your resume long enough?”

“All I’m saying is you can always play with me. Just say the word, and I’ll be there.”

She poked his cheek. “You’ll be a pilot soon. What will you do when I summon you and you don’t appear for weeks?”

“I’ll make it up to you when I come back. With my body or words, you decide.”

She kissed him. She couldn’t get enough of it. What a miracle not to long for those lips from afar.

Caleb drummed his fingers on her thigh. “I’ve been wondering, why do I keep hearing Hyunki’s name?”

She chortled and sat back on the cabinet. He had to zero in on this. “Because he has a crush on your meimei.”

“Did you kiss him?”

“You were there hiding in the bushes.”

“I meant from your first past. Did you kiss him?”

The strips of light on the floor were suddenly worth a close scrutiny.

Caleb bent to look at her from the front. His voice was saccharine sweet. “My lovely meimei, was he your first kiss?”

She copied his tone and smiled. “My dearest gege, why do you want to know the things you won’t like knowing?”

“You’re mine. That includes your past. So tell me.”

She fluttered her lashes, and he did it back. “Fine, we did, but it didn’t count as my first.”

“So many things happened under this roof without my knowing, I see.”

“It was just a peck! If you want to be technical about it, I kissed your cheek first at Skyhaven.”

He slow-clapped. “And then you came back to kiss another boy. Would you like a star for that?”

“Keep your star to yourself. You kissed my cheek once then pretended it never happened because I lost my memories. Every time I saw you, I had to stand there like an idiot because you turned me into one.”

The teasing in Caleb’s expression faded. “You lost your memories?”

“Because of the Toring Chip.” She waved it off. “They came back to me later, but you took advantage of my amnesia and never brought it up.”

“You were a part of the Farspace Fleet?”

Skating past her accusation. Excellent job.

“I stole your spare chip and injected it into me.” She scoffed. “You were so secretive about it. Didn’t leave me with much choice.”

Caleb squished her cheeks until her lips puffed out. “Don’t do stupid things like that again, got it?”

“Let me go.”

“Say it first.”

“Yes, I heard you. Yes, I won’t be stupid.” She wrinkled her nose. “My point is, that night in your room was my first real kiss.”

She didn’t kiss her hookups. It might be an outdated belief, but she wanted to keep her kisses romantic. Her body was sufficient to do the rest. She didn’t think she’d find anything romantic again.

“It was mine too.” Caleb kneaded her cheeks to their original shape. “There won’t be anyone else after you.”

He wasn’t ending things with her. But then again, what was there to end when they weren’t anything to begin with?

She kissed Caleb’s palm. “You’re also my last.”

Footnotes:

I didn’t plan to make their relationship this sexual, but the way Imperial Thronesong utilises sex in their dynamic changed my mind. Also, Verdant Wetlands.

Did you know what I was picturing to get into the nostalgic mood when MC met her friends? Steve The Hair Harrington somehow. He makes me feel nostalgic.

Taglist: @animecrazy76 @scarab0rti0n

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