Xela @xelasrecords - Tumblr Blog

Time Undone Ch. 15

Caleb x MC

Caleb is dead for the second time. The Evol extraction project on corpses is underway, and his body is EVER’s prime subject.

MC, who returns to Skyhaven after four years to help Welkin Funeral Home, has to get him back—while her life is at stake. Then an anomaly throws her back in time, to the post-graduation summer when Caleb is still alive.

She will save him this time, whatever it takes.

*New chapter will be updated every Thursday/Friday depending on your time zone.*

Chapters: CH 1 | CH 2 | CH 3 | CH 4 | CH 5 | CH 6 | CH 7 | CH 8 | CH 9 | CH 10 | CH 11 | CH 12 | CH 13 | CH 14 | CH 15

Tags: time travel, human experimentation, forbidden love, pseudocest, BDSM, usage of gege as a kink but more importantly as a source of stress, boundaries what boundaries, codependency, anxiety, depression, suicide attempt, suicidal thoughts, self-harm, food as a love language, no beta we die like Josephine, except she's alive again here because we're back in the past, nonconsensual touching, not between Caleb and MC, gore, major character death, praise kink, grief

Total Words: TBA | Chapter Words: 6.7k

Masterlist | Read on AO3

Golden light flared up so bright that it temporarily blinded her.

The cacophony of laughter came first, then the arms squishing her so tight that she swayed in her bar stool, then the thumping music in the background.

In front of her, a woman with wild curls pulled her in by the head and slipped a pill into her mouth. It melted instantly. “Don’t worry. It’s mint.”

Her tongue felt heavy to command, and this woman reeked of alcohol. “Why should I be worried?”

“Isn’t your brother picking you up?”

Brother.

She searched through the window behind her, trying to find her bearing on where and when this place was. There weren’t many cars on the road, and the skyline wasn’t densely lit with artificial lights. The idle darkness reminded her of Boveta, but Boveta had riotous pubs, not hybrids of a restaurant and a neon bar.

“Is this Nowa?”

“One cocktail is your limit?” a man teased, and the others laughed.

She didn’t feel buzzed. “What year is this?”

“Twenty fifty-three, darling,” the guy who’d been hugging her said. He pushed up his glasses and turned her by the jaw to the two people opposite them. “Wager she’s seriously drunk.”

“Lay off her. We’ve had a hard day. Funerals for children are the worst. Those small coffins.” The woman tipped the rest of her drink and flumped against the guy beside her. She assumed they were dating. No one without romantic feelings would smile so helplessly while watching her like that.

She needed to find her Caleb.

But her foot caught against the stool’s leg, and she found herself sprawled on the ground. The glasses guy got down to help her, but a man in a dark coat was rushing through the door as she looked up.

“Are you hurt? How many drinks did you have?” He scanned her arms and legs before coming back to her face. “Sorry I’m late. Couldn’t land on time because of the turbulence.”

Being pummelled in the gut would shock her less. The baby fat she’d just got used to was gone, chiselled off to reveal a delicately refined jaw. He had a very faint smile line and dark under-eyes that weren’t as faint.

Caleb succeeded.

He’d grown past twenty-five. Twenty-nine this year, should be. He was in the DAA uniform.

Her eyes welled up, and she threw her hands around him. “You’ve made it. Thank you. Thank you for still being here.”

Caleb slowly extracted her arms. “I told you I’d come home.”

“You don’t always.”

His jaw ticked, then he dragged her up. “She’s too drunk,” he said to the people who, upon reflecting, seemed to be her colleagues. “Sorry for breaking up the session, but I need to get her home. Forward the bill to her. I’ll cover everything.” He flashed a sunny smile.

That was his pre-Colonel move, to generously bestow that smile to anyone in his vicinity. She couldn’t help her tears.

“Oh, honey.” The man with glasses offered her a tissue, which Caleb took to wipe her eyes. “Rest up and leave today’s work behind. You’ll feel better tomorrow.”

“Or worse. Hangover is the bane of humankind,” the other guy said.

“She had one cocktail.”

“And look at the mess she’s turned into.”

“Crying is a perfectly healthy emotional response!” the woman protested.

She gave a measly thumbs-up to this person that she wanted to get to know more of before Caleb tugged her out.

The abrupt transition from the humidity of summer to the pinpricks chill of winter gave her whiplash. Caleb spread his coat over her and let her huddle in his warmth while he made a turn into a narrow alley.

Below the lone lamppost, shining down on them like a spotlight, he pushed her up against the wall.

Caleb’s lips crashed into hers, unyielding.

It reminded her of the kiss they’d exchanged in the bathroom, but this was less fearful. Caleb wasn’t treating her like she was fragile. His hand gripped her neck the way she liked it, his other arm rounding her waist, and he closed the remaining distance between them.

“I should’ve handcuffed you to my side.” He breathed into her mouth. “You left right after you promised you were mine.”

Guilt washed over her. “What happened after?”

Caleb’s fingers around her neck tensed. “You forgot about us.”

“So the original body stayed behind.”

“And your eighteen-year-old soul came back. She didn’t remember anything from when you were in her body.”

“How’s Nainai? Are we still…?” She couldn’t bring herself to say the possibility aloud.

“Family? Yeah.” Caleb ran his hand through his hair with a cutting laugh. “You lost your memories. What was there to talk about if you couldn’t remember what we should talk about?”

“And she just accepted it?”

“She’d get amnesia too if she could. She was eager to put this behind her.”

“Gideon?” she asked.

“We had to cut off all contacts before moving.”

The upcoming question was harder to ask. “Were we still together?”

Caleb’s finger did a little tap on her cheek. “Did you think I could bring myself to ruin you when all you wanted was a gege to rely on?” He smiled acidly. “I waited eight years for you. I didn’t know where you went. That could’ve been the last time I saw you.”

Her hand dropped from his shoulder. Of course. Without his death, she never would have recognised the romantic love they’d been harbouring for each other and gathered the courage to pursue him. She’d subjected him to eight years of torture simply because she was too much of a weakling to stand Grandma’s rejection.

Caleb had to carry the weight of their history alone. He didn’t have anyone to talk to. He couldn’t reach for her or Gideon. It must have been especially tough when he had to deal with their relocation.

He must be sleeping alone again.

But without her time travel, she doubted they could remain a family. Grandma could have disowned him, and then communicating with him would be a challenge.

One thing or another. This was supposedly the best outcome they could have, but Caleb wasn’t happy. It hurt to see him hurt. She did this to him.

She fidgeted with her hands, wishing she’d gone back to the time before Grandma barged in. That would’ve solved it. “I’m sorry.”

Caleb took a deep inhale. “No, don’t. It was the anomaly, not you. I should’ve stopped you from punching the mirror too hard.”

She replayed the other anomalous events in her mind. “I don’t think that matters. Gideon’s mirror glowed without breaking. I should’ve left the bathroom the minute it activated.”

He seemed as if she’d doused him in ice water. “You stayed when you noticed it was glowing? You just stood there?”

She shuffled her feet and fixed her stare at the bricks beneath her.

He scoffed out a laugh. “I shouldn’t have given you space. I couldn’t stop wondering if it was an accident or if you’d disappeared because you hated me and regretted us. Do you know how it feels to be left behind without any explanation?”

It took her some time to answer. “I do,” she said quietly.

Which was precisely why she should have known better.

It wasn’t his fault. This Caleb wasn’t the one who walked out on her. All that rage for her to do the same thing anyway. There was no one she loathed more than herself.

“I’m really sorry. I thought it’d be better if I left. But it wasn’t you. I never regretted you.”

“What did you think I’d do after you left? Thank Gran for driving you away? Throw a party because my meimei didn’t love me enough to stay with me?”

She looked up at him, horrified. “No! I love you more than anything. Anyone. Myself. I wasn’t thinking.” His pain, her pain, they were all entwined, strangling each other to death. She couldn’t tell who she was hurting for anymore.

Caleb tidied her hair that he’d made a mess of. “No, you were thinking too much. You’re always so in over your head that you don’t let me in.”

She flinched. “I do,” she said, scrambling for the evidence in her jumbled mind. “I told you about my past, my insecurities, how I felt. Only you know about them.”

“You’ve never been truly honest about your present feelings. I can’t know how you feel as they come to you. You keep me nipping at your heels.”

“That’s not—I was trying to protect you.”

“You were trying to protect yourself.”

Her breathing was cut short. That was what she’d been doing, wasn’t it? No matter how vast her affection for Caleb was, she put herself above him. When push came to shove, it was her feelings that mattered more.

She’d left him for eight years. That was an even longer wait than she’d done. Her selfishness knew no bounds.

“I’m sorry.” Tears lined down her cheek. Another alley, another crying session. Her pitifulness also knew no bounds.

Caleb’s hard expression shattered, and she hated it—the fact that she’d taken away his right to be furious at her. He hadn’t done enough. He hadn’t even started.

But instead of harming her, he wiped her face and pulled her into a crushing hug. It did nothing but push more tears to spill out. “I’m sorry. I know you were scared. You’ve been through more things than I have.”

“Don’t excuse me.” She tried to push at his shoulder, but he wouldn’t budge. “You can dole out another punishment. I’ll take it.”

His hand snaked around the back of her head. “No. You don’t need more from me. You’re already doing it to yourself.”

“I haven’t done anything.”

“You’re thinking it.”

“Caleb.”

“Listen to your gege.” He stroked her back with a gentleness that she didn’t deserve. “There’s no such thing as a good life if you’re not in it. Just don’t leave me again.”

“I’m sorry.”

She trailed her hand down his right arm until it clasped his fingers. They had the softness of flesh. The skin wasn’t too elastic.

It felt real. Her disappearance had brought Caleb his arm back. This had to be a silver lining. Something good had to come out of her wretched action.

“I didn’t get to see you grow older,” she said. She’d failed to put this into account. “I used to fantasise about that the most. Watching you achieve everything you want in your life and growing old together.”

Again she found herself understanding her first Caleb’s plight. He must have felt the same when he had to pretend to die.

There was no way to apologise to him now.

“Put this time travel business to an end, okay?” Caleb held her at his arm’s length. “We can’t keep missing each other like this. I regretted not seeing you turn into twenty-six too when you first time-travelled to me.”

She motioned at herself. “Well, you got it now.”

“I did, yes. At the cost of losing you,” he said before pursing his lips in regret.

He didn’t have to take it back. What he said was the truth.

“Tell me how to make it up to you, please.” Her fingertips were throbbing from the freezing temperature, but she kept them out of her pockets. She had to pay.

Caleb sighed, fog curling out of his mouth. “You can thank me for setting you on the funeral director path. Your younger self was fighting me tooth and nail to be a Hunter.”

She grimaced. “My condolences.” Putting up with her couldn’t have been easy. It must have been hard then, and even harder now. She still couldn’t understand why Caleb wasn’t more repulsed by her.

He led her out of the alley while passing a hot pack into her palm. Her other free hand he stuffed into his pocket. He was warm. Human warm. She squeezed lightly to ground herself in this new reality, and he squeezed back.

“After your hundredth outburst, I almost gave in,” he said. “I thought maybe dealing with death hadn’t appealed to you at that age.”

“Hadn’t it?”

He let out an inelegant snort. “The moment I showed you embalming videos, you abandoned your Hunter dreams and wouldn’t stop talking about them. Now I know how to stitch a jaw up for viewing.”

She permitted herself a small smile. The sloping road they were trudging up was worth the joy too. Pretty little quaint shops guided them up the hill.

As they walked, the buildings became sparse and the street quieter. It made a strange comparison to Linkon and Skyhaven, where a lot of places were lit well into the night.

Their house was tucked between dense trees, isolated from the residential area. She eyed the high steps in puzzlement. Surely it’d be hard for Grandma to climb them.

She decided to ask about it while Caleb fussed with the lock that wouldn’t recognise his fingerprint. “Do we still live together? All three of us?”

He had to shake the handle and bump into the door for it to swing open. The lighting system came to life when they set foot on the threshold. “We do. Gran is in a nursing home.”

She squinted at him. “You found a way to get rid of her.”

“She’s old and frail. She needs professional help that we can’t give.” Caleb took her coat and brushed off the static in her hair and clothes.

“So you got rid of her and got us an inaccessible place.”

He handed her a glass of warm water. “You chose this house. You wanted to be far from the rest of the town.”

The open layout made the rustic cabin feel more spacious. A raised platform was perched outside the living room, overlooking the scenery below. She slipped past the glass door and settled down at the edge of the platform. It was a captivating view of bare trees and winding houses covered in white.

Caleb sat beside her and placed a hand on her hip. “This open deck had won you over too,” he said with a distant smile. “If you look all the way there when the sky is clear, you can see the sea that Gran loves. You’ll love it. The other you did.”

She tilted her head at him. “How could you tell it was me at the bar?”

He stared afar for a while before meeting her gaze. “Your eyes,” Caleb said. “Only you have that much sadness in them. You always look like you’re about to leave everything behind.” His thumb swept along the skin under her eye. “Stop going where I can’t follow,” he murmured.

She swallowed her apology and managed a nod.

Caleb kissed her, chastely once, then pushed her back to the platform while protecting her head. To her, it was hours ago before they’d last kissed. But to him, it’d been nearly a decade. He was a starved man.

She owed it to him to satiate his hunger.

Caleb moved them to the living room where it was safe for her to be undressed. But after he set her clothes aside, he paused.

“Is it weird for you now?” she asked, peeking up at him from the sofa.

“You’re wearing the necklace again. You took it with you when you left.” He aligned it with his. “But it’s got rustier.”

She sat up to her elbows. “Gold can’t degrade.” But Caleb was right. The apple pendant was black as if charred. Was it a result of time travel? Most likely so. The burning sensation made more sense now. “But I don’t care. I’m wearing it. It’s a relic from my time.”

Tentatively, Caleb lowered his head to kiss the junction between her collarbones. “And you’re a relic from my time.”

“This is still your time.”

“When you left, you split it into two. My life became the time when I had you and the time after I lost you.”

She was well-acquainted with that rationalisation. “That’s not fair to my other self,” she argued meekly. “Do you not love her just as much?”

“Obviously.” He rolled his eyes. “But you’re the last person who should talk about fairness.” Caleb touched her apple ring. She must have cleaned it often to retain the shine. “You thought this ring was a simple gift from your nice, loving gege without any meaning behind it.”

“You are my nice, loving gege.”

Caleb’s expression darkened, and he slid down her body, slid down her trousers, and planted an open-mouthed kiss outside her underwear. “But I couldn’t do this to you.”

“Or this.” He bit her inner thigh and licked the spot to soothe the sting.

“Or this.” Her underwear was off her, and he gave a broad lick across her slit.

His purple eyes, the storm brewing inside the galaxy, flicked up to meet hers.

She widened her legs. He could go inside her, take whatever he needed, coil her around his hand so she couldn’t leave again.

Caleb ate her out and pulled bliss out of her. He, too, seemed satisfied when he wiped his chin with her underwear. He considered it for a few seconds before balling it up into her mouth.

She thought he would’ve liked to hear her after all the hiding back then, but—

No. She wouldn’t think about hurtful things. They wouldn’t be busted in this house that was so far from everyone. The girl from this timeline must have had the same idea. Only her bravery to date him was missing, so she’d sentenced him to a lifetime of yearning instead.

Putting Caleb into misery was what all iterations of her had in common.

Her thoughts burst when he slid into her. She locked her ankles above the dip of his pelvic bones, and he moved against her, slowly increasing his pace as she grew more accustomed to him. This was only their second time.

She felt more now. This was how their first should be. Her goading had led to a manic sex that didn’t let her indulge in the feel of him. His size, his length.

Caleb cared too much about her comfort. He kissed her tear away when it slipped past her unbidden. It was awful. She’d rather he hurt her. Lighten the weight of her guilt.

His love was her punishment. She had to live with this after abandoning him.

She angled her hips up and buried his face into her neck. He tucked a cushion beneath her and thrust into her with a renewed vigour. He had to go deeper, deeper into her to pin her down onto this moment.

The sex didn’t last long. Caleb finished on her stomach, and she smiled. She got to have this instead of this body’s real owner. He might love all versions of her, but the person who could snap his control was her. She swiped the cloudy fluid up and licked it clean.

Caleb grabbed her wrist in concern. “I thought you couldn’t stand the taste.”

“A little is fine.”

He repositioned her to straddle him. “It’s been a while since I could see you like this.” He played with her bra strap. “You hid all of this to yourself. I had to respect your privacy.” He massaged her breasts. “This used to be mine.”

She caught his hand and inspected his apple ring. The paint was chipped here and there. “You can’t take care of good things.”

Caleb shrugged. “I never take it off. I can’t lose more of you.”

She planted a kiss on the ring, then on his knuckle. “You have all of me now.”

“You keep saying that, but somehow I keep losing you.”

“Keep? It was once.”

While gritting his teeth, he landed a light knock on her forehead. “Does it matter? Even once is too much.”

“Sorry.” She needed to work on not talking back to him at the wrong time. “But I’m truly yours now.”

“You should be.” Caleb took one nipple into his mouth and pinched the other.

She fell back, her hands gripping his legs to steady herself, but he growled and pressed her flat against him. She tried to take off his DAA uniform and was rewarded with his Evol binding her wrists behind her back.

Caleb had changed. She wondered if it stemmed from his need to keep her close and under his supervision now that she was back. She didn’t care. She was feeling too much pleasure to care.

She mewled when he sucked on her skin harder than usual.

“What? You don’t like pain anymore?” Caleb watched the bruise blooming. “That can’t be right. You’re still her. She likes this.”

The mark was in a crescent shape. Beautiful. “She does.”

“Then?”

She pouted.

Caleb slapped her arse. “I’ve spoiled you too much.”

He kissed her again. They didn’t stop until his desperation was abated and she couldn’t separate the taste of herself and him on her tongue. She loved it.

He was still every inch the Caleb she knew, yet his age was undeniable. His youthfulness had hardened into the weariness most adults had.

But those eyes. She could also recognise him by them alone. They had the capability to look pure, like his yearning for her was without any intention to take her off the world’s greedy clutch.

This similarity she wouldn’t find in anyone else. He was her gege in everything but blood.

She gently traced his flushed cheek and kissed his forehead. It was rarely the other way around. She felt like she’d stolen his role as the protector.

“Wo qin ai de meimei,” Caleb said. My beloved baby sister. But there was a smugness to it that roused her suspicion.

She squished his cheeks. “Be less happy that I’m actually younger than you again.”

“That’s the one good thing that came out of your disappearance. You won’t let me enjoy that?”

She caught his finger running down her navel. His cum had dried, sticky on her skin. “Did you not like it when I was the more knowledgeable one?”

“It’s my duty to protect you as your gege. Can’t blame me for not having a good time watching you steal my job.”

“But that’s because I noticed how much you had to take on for me.”

“Did I ever complain?” Caleb asked.

“Your compliance makes it worse.”

He sighed helplessly. “You’re not a punishment I have to bear. I take care of you because I love you.”

She glowered at him. He was not winning this. Slowly, seductively, she slid off his lap and bent down to pick up her strewn clothes. Let him enjoy what he’d missed.

And enjoy it he did. He stopped her, pulling her hips against his when she was about to put on her trousers. “Are you cold?”

“No?” The house had been heated since she entered.

“Then you don’t need your clothes.” Caleb floated them into the laundry basket. At her protest, he crossed his arms and said, “Tell me what our rule is.”

Her cheeks grew hot. This ability to make her feel small yet thrilled about being small was exclusive to him. “I’m not allowed to wear anything when we’re alone.”

“And aren’t we alone right now?”

She nodded, and he grasped her chin. “Use your words.”

“Yes, we’re alone.”

Caleb snuggled against her hand with a slight smirk, a reminder that he wasn’t as innocent as that college boy anymore. “You’ve hidden your body from me for way too long. Make it up to me this way.”

She wanted to parry that it wasn’t her fault the other her was so obtuse about their mutual feelings, but she did offer, and it was her fault for being tempted by a glowing mirror.

“I’m free-to-view for you.” Because she couldn’t resist teasing him, she added, “Others can view me for the right price.”

Caleb’s hands groped her bottom so hard she had to stand on her tiptoes.

“Gege, Gege, please—”

Her gege simply arched a brow. “What kind of price can they pay that I can’t?”

The pain was such a rush that it left her unable to formulate a clever retort. There really wasn’t anything anyone could give her that could get her away from Caleb. He was the right price, the only one that she’d pay with her heart, body, and soul.

“Nothing. Just a joke. I’m sorry.”

He drew soothing circles on her tender flesh. Her head drooped on his shoulder, savouring his touch. “I like it when you act up like this,” he muttered.

And she still liked the juxtaposition of her being naked while he was clothed. She could afford to be vulnerable with him at no cost. Feeling small meant feeling protected, meant her gege would always contort himself to wrap around her. “Because hurting me gets you off.”

“Is that so bad?” Caleb asked mildly.

She kissed his Adam’s apple. “I wouldn’t want to be with anyone who doesn’t get off on it.”

“You shouldn’t be with anyone who isn’t me.” He guided her towards the room at the far end. “Come, you’ll like seeing this.”

It was her bedroom, evident from the pictures of her with Caleb and the earlier group on the wall. There were so many, and they were so happy. Her gaze snagged on the one where she and Caleb showed off their apple rings to the camera. He was smiling down at her.

Did the other her never notice the sorrow in that smile?

“I wasn’t about to lose you again. Took as many pictures as I could,” said Caleb.

“I thought you liked me more than her?”

“Don’t tell me you’re jealous of yourself.”

Her hand slipped beneath his shirt and pinched his side.

He made a show out of bending from the pain. When she folded her arms, he chuckled and hugged her by the waist. “You’re silly if you think I could cherry-pick which piece of you to love.”

He wasn’t as advanced as her. She was adept at discarding the parts of her that she hated while trying to bear the rest. Caleb could do the job of loving her. It didn’t interest her at all.

“So,” she said, nodding at the wall, “what has she done?”

“Made friends. Those three are the ones you hung out with the most. Lenny, Keesha, and Ian.” The glasses, the drunk woman, and her boyfriend. They were lying on their living room rug, captured mid-laughter. The photographer was ostensibly Caleb; she could tell by the toes.

“Are you also friends with them?”

“You said a friend group with a gege supervising you is not a group where you could be authentically yourself.”

“I did not say that. That stupid girl. It’s like she never grew up.”

“I don’t accept any kind of insult to any version of you.” Caleb laid a hand on her head. “I wish you didn’t have to grow up so fast.”

“I was stunted. This is for the best.”

“You could’ve indulged in your childhood whims longer if I hadn’t died.”

She stepped into his view and extended her arms out. “I can still play with you. Pick me up.”

Caleb obliged and placed a kiss on the side of her breast. “Play like this?”

“Anything. I’m flexible.”

A glint returned to his eyes. “We should test that claim.”

She laughed and pointed at another picture taken in this house. Everyone was holding steaming mugs on the patio. She was starting to regret that the other her’s personality couldn’t merge with hers. There must be something about that woman that endeared people to her. “Do they visit often?”

“Whenever your shifts aligned. This was after you were freed from an emergency call at night.”

“And we chose to sit back with cocoa instead of sleep?”

Caleb bounced her in his arms. “There was rum in those. Lenny loves his booze. You fell asleep right after.”

“Wow, stupid and weak. My alcohol tolerance wasn’t that low.”

He poked her side to scold her. “You didn’t dare to drink too much when your gege was around.”

“Stupid, weak, and a scaredy cat. Wow.” She counted off her fingers. “Are you around a lot?”

“I try.”

She pointed at the photo. “You made that for me, didn’t you?” Her mug was a caricature of Santa Claus while the others’ had ordinary mugs. “And you were the one who talked her into expanding her social circle.”

It was unexpected. She didn’t peg Caleb as the type who’d be fine with her having friends other than him.

“It’s important to you,” he said.

“You’re not scared I’ll hang out with them more than you?”

“Every day you come home to me, not them.” He smiled with a wince. “Well, on days that I’m off-duty.”

“How are you in this life?” She played with his ears. “I’d never got to see you this old.”

“Twenty-nine isn’t old.”

“You’d never reached it anyway.”

He lapsed into a brief silence, then his hand went up to salute her. She was impressed by his strength. Not everyone could carry a person with one arm, and he didn’t even wobble. “DAA’s Captain Caleb, on your command.”

She could cry for him. Happy tears now, finally. He’d reached his dream and got to keep it. He wasn’t forced to command a spaceship and mindless officers. “How do you find it?”

“The best part is when I come back to you.”

“Other than that?”

Caleb’s tired smile resurfaced. “It can get boring when you’re flying in the dark for days, and your only companions are the cockpit lights and beeping sounds. But I come home relieved every time that the earth is safe, because that means you’re safe.”

In her experience, the earth’s safety wasn’t equal to hers, but she digressed. Whatever helped him to persist and prevail.

“I’m proud of you.”

“You should be.”

He carried her around as she took in the rest of the pictures. Moving about naked made her feel as though she was implicit in a wrongdoing Caleb had instigated. Grandma had always been there in their childhood home. She couldn’t yet shake off the feeling that they weren’t supposed to do this.

Strictly speaking, they weren’t. He was still her non-blood-related brother. But no one was watching except him, and she preened at his attention.

It didn’t stop her from checking the surroundings though. The windows in this room might be spare, but there could be a nosy person hanging around at the edge of the forest.

Caleb turned her towards him. “Do you want to get dressed? You don’t need to do this for me.”

“I’m also doing it for myself.”

“You’re anxious.”

“I’m fine. It’s just that we used to hide everywhere. It doesn’t feel real that we don’t have to anymore, in our own home at that.” Although this place didn’t feel like hers. She hadn’t earned any of it.

With the path her life was on, she’d forever be an interloper in someone else’s life. This wasn’t hers, nor was the past she’d occupied. At least the person from this timeline managed to feel like she belonged here.

She hoped she did.

They passed by a photo that caused her to jump from Caleb’s arms. Tucked in the dark corner by the cupboard was a picture of her with Grandma. In another, Caleb was there with them, but standing at a distance.

“Did this pretend arrangement really work?” she asked.

Caleb looked over her shoulder. “Gran isn’t living with us, is she?”

“And before that? How did you guys pull it off?”

“It was you. You were the glue.” He tucked her hair and kissed the back of her ear. “You kept us together until Gran needed a permanent caretaker.”

“How sick is she?”

“Her headaches are worse, though nobody knows why. She also fell in the bathroom. Can’t go anywhere without a wheelchair now. We don’t have the time to care for her full-time.”

She couldn’t get her emotions in order. Her stomach shrivelled from guilt of not questioning about Grandma earlier, but the house eviction still stung fresh. Seeing how tightly Grandma hugged the other her was a double blow. She’d got her pristine grandchild back.

She truly couldn’t be accepted for who she was.

“Do you come into my room often?” she said.

“Only for innocent hangouts like we used to do before we da—before. I didn’t do anything with her, Meimei.”

Caleb needn’t be loyal to a relationship that she didn’t allow him to put a label on. She examined the photos closely, but the details blurred. She’d left him to remember them alone despite knowing how lonely it was. What had she done aside from giving him hints to change the future? Brought plague to his previously joyous life, yes.

She should have skipped the temper tantrum at the Skyhaven hotel and hurled herself off its rooftop.

“But she knew something was up. That’s why she didn’t stick these with the other photos.” No doubt she’d noticed the tension and thought better not to ask. She’d had a lot of practice since childhood. “I want to visit Grandma. Where’s the nursing home?”

“Near the beach. There’s only one nursing home in here.”

“How small is this town?”

“You’ll learn to get used to seeing the same people at the supermarket.”

Even the small city she’d chosen in Boveta was larger than this. “But they mind their own business?”

“We’re safe.” Caleb slung his arms over her. “EVER has entered the bigger states in Nowa—they’ve established themselves everywhere—but Oahi is safe. Guess they don’t care about a small island,” he said. “How about this? I’ll bring you on a tour tomorrow and drop you off so you can see Gran for yourself.”

She supposed bigger areas didn’t mean blending in would be easier. None of this would’ve happened if that were true. “You’re not coming?”

“Do you want your reunion with her to be a peaceful occasion or not?”

She smiled and scanned her room. Queen-sized bed, enough to fit Caleb and her. Work suit hung on the cupboard’s handle. Personalised memories that were precious to the other her but meant nothing to her. Turned out she could make a good life out of herself if Caleb was a part of it.

“Was I happy here?” she said.

He smiled. “Very.”

But he sounded sad.

“And you? Are you happy too?”

Caleb blinked as if roused from a lethargic dream, then kissed her nose. “Now I am.”

She woke up with the other side of her bed cold.

Her heart lurched until she read the rushed letter Caleb had left on the bedside table. The DAA had called him in for a last-minute meeting before sending out their new squadron, he’d prepared a smoothie bowl in the fridge, and he’d make up for it when he came back. Soon, he hoped.

She tried not to be too disappointed. He must’ve chosen not to wake her up to let her rest, but she wanted to see him off. One of the many things she’d dreamed of doing but never got to.

It was fine. She could explore the town alone. She’d take note of the interesting things she’d see and relay them to him once he came home. Caleb said there was a weekend market in the town centre where she could get colourful scarves. Depending on her mood about Grandma when she got there, she could buy one for her. Or she could buy one anyway and decide whether to give it to her after meeting her.

She couldn’t decide whether she was excited to see her.

On one hand, she held the ace card. If she could act cheerful enough and dispose of that stupid sadness in her eyes, she could worm her way into this family. Grandma hadn’t noticed her the first time, so there was a good chance she wouldn’t now, especially at her old age.

On the other hand, the thought of more acting and lying tired her out, though it was nothing compared to the acting and lying she’d put Caleb through.

Grandma’s words still rang clear in her mind, all those accusations of sexual assault directed at him. She’d lain below him, so she’d been taken advantage of. She was the younger one, so she had no say in their relationship.

She’d get the scarf on another day.

From the living room, her phone rang. She made her way to it slowly, hoping it wasn’t anyone she should know well because Caleb hadn’t briefed her on her connections, which supposedly were quite a lot. That woman did not know the meaning of lying low.

But it was Oahi Nursing Home. She picked it up—and wished she hadn’t, because now her idyllic pocket in time was broken, now she regretted the things she’d felt and thought about Grandma.

Josephine was missing.

She disappeared last night, the receptionist said. The security had patrolled the area, including the beach and the sweet shop, but she wasn’t anywhere. Josephine had wheeled herself off into the night, and the surveillance cameras hadn’t caught her.

There was a cliff that they hadn’t swept through, and they requested her assistance. Making Josephine listen to anyone but her would be a challenge when she was throwing a tantrum. She hadn’t known there was a cliff, let alone having it be so accessible to the elderly.

When she demanded the staff explain why they hadn’t informed her sooner, they came up with a poor excuse of not wanting to worry the guardians.

Grandma couldn’t walk. Did she miss her and Caleb? Was she making her way up here? She threw a last glance at the fridge. Her breakfast. She’d finish it later before Caleb came back.

“Does she do this often?” She tried to keep her voice level while sprinting out the door, coat forgotten.

“This is the first time, ma’am. We apologise. We’re doing everything we can to locate her.”

Snow dripped down her shoulders. Grandma would be cold. The ground would be slippery. She needed to hurry.

“Do better.” She hung up.

After finding the cliff location on her phone’s map, she wasted no time charging there. Calling Caleb was no use. Her attempts were redirected to voicemails. He was rarely contactable at work.

Some elderly people had the extraordinary skill to sneak past everyone and go on their own adventures. Her grandmother could’ve gained that skill.

She stumbled a handful of times—the front of her slippers kept folding backwards and causing her toes to dig into the ground. She had half a mind to let herself fall and roll down the slanted road. She’d reach her destination faster.

If the townspeople were staring and whispering about a frantic woman shouting for her grandma, she didn’t notice.

What she did notice through her panting was that the air was starting to taste like brine. The wind was stronger at the cliffside, carrying the sound of crashing waves below and driving chill into her bones.

Contrary to her expectations, there wasn’t anyone patrolling the area. There wasn’t anyone at all.

“Nainai! Where are you?” she yelled while running across the grass. “Stop playing and come out!”

She crouched, grabbing a fistful of grass, and peeked over the ledge. The rocks down there weren’t supporting any mangled bodies. No, no blood or leftover limbs.

She was about to get up when a strong kick to her back rolled her so close to the edge. Her most desperate dream almost became true.

But survival instinct had other plans for her. She managed to stop herself just in time by scratching into the dirt as hard as she could.

Her drenched slipper fell off her dangling foot.

A shoe drove down her shoulder, pressing her spine flat against the cold earth.

Liu Ying scoffed. “There you are. I knew your brother was a liar.”

Footnote:

While I often see masochism being represented in fanfics, I seldom see the reality of sadism being enjoyed by the sadist, especially when they have a gentle personality. It’s a mutual thing, hence why I included the exchange “Because hurting me gets you off.” “Is that so bad?” “I wouldn’t want to be with anyone who doesn’t get off on it.” I don’t think we should dictate kinks based on the “outside” personalities because people are more multifaceted than they seem. Someone who’s indulgent with his meimei like Caleb could have a rougher taste in the bedroom. Same goes with MC who’s pretty submissive in bed but prefers to take charge in battles. I also see Caleb as someone who’s moulded to MC. He’s like this because she’s like that.

Taglist: @animecrazy76 @scarab0rti0n

Trending Blogs

Recently Viewed Blogs

Xela