This is Male Privilege @maleprivilege - Tumblr Blog

Now that feminism has become more fashionable, it’s harder to tell who our true allies are.

Tinder Bob is a cinematic example of an infuriating phenomenon: the woke misogynist. The woke misogynist is a guy who talks a big game about gender equality and consent, uses vocabulary like “triggering” without rolling his eyes, wears a pussy hat to the Women’s March, prefers to fuck feminists and may freely call himself one, too—then turns around and harasses you, assaults you, or belittles you. Perhaps his behavior throws you off because he’s confident in himself and his pro-woman bonafides. Or because he apologizes nicely and indulges you in a thoughtful conversation after the offending incident. Or, most likely, because his misogyny is more ambiguous and subtle than that of, say, Bill Cosby or Roger Ailes or Donald Trump.

(via Why McCann Dropped a Statue of a ‘Fearless Girl’ Next to Wall Street’s Charging Bull Overnight – Adweek)

Here are 6 things to keep in mind on this International Women's Day.

The day was originally called International Working Women’s Day. It was first celebrated on February 28, 1909, in New York in remembrance of a 1908 strike of the International Ladies’ Garment Workers’ Union when 15,000 workers, including many immigrants, marched through the city's lower east side to demand social and political rights.

The first modern International Women’s Day was held in 1914, five years after its inception, on March 8. The day was chosen because it was a Sunday, which the majority of women would have off work allowing them to participate in marches and other events.

IWD is also an official holiday in 15 countries including China, Ukraine and Vietnam.

UN Reports show that, despite women working longer hours than men when both paid and unpaid work is taken into consideration, women still earn an average of 24 percent less than men do worldwide.

Despite the UN's Declaration on the Elimination of Violence Against Women back in 1993, currently, 1 in 3 women worldwide suffer from physical or sexual violence.

Despite the fact that women outpace men in both secondary and higher education, unemployment rates disproportionately affect women worldwide. As of 2013, the global female employment-to-population ratio was only 47.1 percent. Conversely, for men, that percentage was 72.2.

via Inside Daily Brief

thereandit

But most of all, stop thinking that what people so loathingly refer to as the “friendzone” is some sort of purgatory women put “nice guys” into. My friendship is not a crappy consolation prize that you’re left with if I deny you a sexual relationship– and my body is not your reward for good behavior. Thinking that simply being a “good guy,” whatever that may mean, entitles you to unlimited sex with the girl of your choice shows that you don’t truly believe women should be in control of, and have full ownership of, our own bodies; instead, it shows you think we should use them like doggy treats whenever you do the human equivalent of a jumping trick. If you treat us as humans, that’s fantastic, but we do not owe you for it.

The “Good Guy” Myth | Develle Dish | Develle Dish (via thereandit)

"Yes, it's important that their dad is a feminist, because now that's what they expect of all men."

The president said that it was important to his daughters that he be a feminist, “because now that’s what they expect of all men.”

It's so hard for people to understand subtle things

I'm a college student who was walking down a major street in my city to go to Target. A lot of people were walking, I was talking to my mom and it was broad daylight so I felt safe. A man proceeded to invade my personal space by putting his face close to mine and say "You're beautiful." He walked away, yet even with the many people around, talking to my mom on the phone still and broad daylight, I still felt too uncomfortable and worried to call him out on his behavior. I laughed it off to my mom who was worried about me walking alone in the first place and called the guy a creep. Mostly though, I felt really sad that I couldn't stand up to him due to worries of my safety and that my laughing could be misconstrued as being okay with that kind of experience and not just a defense mechanism ingrained into me by society. Later that week, I was walking at night with a good guy friend of mine explaining catcalling and my experience with this guy. He told me that this guy invading my personal space or a guy being gross in his catcalling was an outlier of society because he has not done it or seen it so therefore I'm getting up in arms about something that only really exists in the movies now. Furthermore, I argued that I might have still been uncomfortable even if the "You're beautiful" was said from a distance and in a polite tone especially from a male stranger. He argued that a compliment like "You're beautiful" or "I like your outfit or hair" is not uncomfortable and that he loves to receive compliments from women and they respond favorably when he gives them compliments even when strangers. He then proceeded to give a compliment to a women and a stranger to both of us about her outfit and she responded with a "thank you" and didn't seem bothered. To him, it was all the proof he needed that my view that all types of compliments, especially from male strangers to females, being uncomfortable and part of rape culture was borderline ridiculous. All the while, he did acknowledge that if I wasn't clearly walking with him then he probably wouldn't have given her a compliment considering it was nighttime and there weren't many people around. I didn't know what to say. Someone explain it to me because he is a great guy. What was worse though: my female roommate and another girl agreed with him on all counts.

#community #submission

jkottke

Their life without gender

Tyler Ford was born a girl, transitioned to being a man in college, but now identifies as an agender person.

I have been out as an agender, or genderless, person for about a year now. To me, this simply means having the freedom to exist as a person without being confined by the limits of the western gender binary. I wear what I want to wear, and do what I want to do, because it is absurd to limit myself to certain activities, behaviours or expressions based on gender. People don’t know what to make of me when they see me, because they feel my features contradict one another. They see no room for the curve of my hips to coexist with my facial hair; they desperately want me to be someone they can easily categorise. My existence causes people to question everything they have been taught about gender, which in turn inspires them to question what they know about themselves, and that scares them. Strangers are often desperate to figure out what genitalia I have, in the hope that my body holds the key to some great secret and unavoidable truth about myself and my gender. It doesn’t. My words hold my truth. My body is simply the vehicle that gives me the opportunity to express myself.

Ford uses the “they”, “them”, and “their” pronouns to refer to themselves. (Is it themselves? Or would it be themself? English is a relatively young and fluid language but even it can’t keep up.)

mansplainedmarxist-blog

mansplaining at its finest

voltairine-kropotkin

EVERY time you try to talk about patriarchy

timoni

“Once an ex-partner told me “You look better in jeans and a tshirt. Why do you wear dresses? Why do you wear make up? You don’t have to dress up to impress me.” That moment led me to so many realizations. It made me realize that most people think femininity is an act to impress men. It was then that I was 100% sure my dressing up wasn’t for him at all, I didn’t at all care if a partner disliked my dresses, or makeup. I was wearing them for me.”

Coding Like a Girl, by Sailorhg https://medium.com/@sailorhg/coding-like-a-girl-595b90791cce (via timoni)

The Male Privilege Checklist

1. My odds of being hired for a job, when competing against female applicants, are probably skewed in my favor. The more prestigious the job, the larger the odds are skewed.

2. I can be confident that my co-workers won’t think I got my job because of my sex – even though that might be true. (More).

3. If I am never promoted, it’s not because of my sex.

4. If I fail in my job or career, I can feel sure this won’t be seen as a black mark against my entire sex’s capabilities.

5. I am far less likely to face sexual harassment at work than my female co-workers are. (More).

6. If I do the same task as a woman, and if the measurement is at all subjective, chances are people will think I did a better job.

7. If I’m a teen or adult, and if I can stay out of prison, my odds of being raped are relatively low. (More).

8. On average, I am taught to fear walking alone after dark in average public spaces much less than my female counterparts are.

9. If I choose not to have children, my masculinity will not be called into question.

10. If I have children but do not provide primary care for them, my masculinity will not be called into question.

11. If I have children and provide primary care for them, I’ll be praised for extraordinary parenting if I’m even marginally competent. (More).

12. If I have children and a career, no one will think I’m selfish for not staying at home.

13. If I seek political office, my relationship with my children, or who I hire to take care of them, will probably not be scrutinized by the press.

14. My elected representatives are mostly people of my own sex. The more prestigious and powerful the elected position, the more this is true.

15. When I ask to see “the person in charge,” odds are I will face a person of my own sex. The higher-up in the organization the person is, the surer I can be.

16. As a child, chances are I was encouraged to be more active and outgoing than my sisters. (More).

17. As a child, I could choose from an almost infinite variety of children’s media featuring positive, active, non-stereotyped heroes of my own sex. I never had to look for it; male protagonists were (and are) the default.

18. As a child, chances are I got more teacher attention than girls who raised their hands just as often. (More).

19. If my day, week or year is going badly, I need not ask of each negative episode or situation whether or not it has sexist overtones.

20. I can turn on the television or glance at the front page of the newspaper and see people of my own sex widely represented.

21. If I’m careless with my financial affairs it won’t be attributed to my sex.

22. If I’m careless with my driving it won’t be attributed to my sex.

23. I can speak in public to a large group without putting my sex on trial.

24. Even if I sleep with a lot of women, there is no chance that I will be seriously labeled a “slut,” nor is there any male counterpart to “slut-bashing.” (More).

25. I do not have to worry about the message my wardrobe sends about my sexual availability. (More).

26. My clothing is typically less expensive and better-constructed than women’s clothing for the same social status. While I have fewer options, my clothes will probably fit better than a woman’s without tailoring. (More).

27. The grooming regimen expected of me is relatively cheap and consumes little time. (More).

28. If I buy a new car, chances are I’ll be offered a better price than a woman buying the same car. (More).

29. If I’m not conventionally attractive, the disadvantages are relatively small and easy to ignore.

30. I can be loud with no fear of being called a shrew. I can be aggressive with no fear of being called a bitch.

31. I can ask for legal protection from violence that happens mostly to men without being seen as a selfish special interest, since that kind of violence is called “crime” and is a general social concern. (Violence that happens mostly to women is usually called “domestic violence” or “acquaintance rape,” and is seen as a special interest issue.)

32. I can be confident that the ordinary language of day-to-day existence will always include my sex. “All men are created equal,” mailman, chairman, freshman, he.

33. My ability to make important decisions and my capability in general will never be questioned depending on what time of the month it is.

34. I will never be expected to change my name upon marriage or questioned if I don’t change my name.

35. The decision to hire me will not be based on assumptions about whether or not I might choose to have a family sometime soon.

36. Every major religion in the world is led primarily by people of my own sex. Even God, in most major religions, is pictured as male.

37. Most major religions argue that I should be the head of my household, while my wife and children should be subservient to me.

38. If I have a wife or live-in girlfriend, chances are we’ll divide up household chores so that she does most of the labor, and in particular the most repetitive and unrewarding tasks. (More).

39. If I have children with my girlfriend or wife, I can expect her to do most of the basic childcare such as changing diapers and feeding.

40. If I have children with my wife or girlfriend, and it turns out that one of us needs to make career sacrifices to raise the kids, chances are we’ll both assume the career sacrificed should be hers.

41. Assuming I am heterosexual, magazines, billboards, television, movies, pornography, and virtually all of media is filled with images of scantily-clad women intended to appeal to me sexually. Such images of men exist, but are rarer.

42. In general, I am under much less pressure to be thin than my female counterparts are. (More). If I am fat, I probably suffer fewer social and economic consequences for being fat than fat women do. (More).

43. If I am heterosexual, it’s incredibly unlikely that I’ll ever be beaten up by a spouse or lover. (More).

44. Complete strangers generally do not walk up to me on the street and tell me to “smile.” (More: 1 2).

45. Sexual harassment on the street virtually never happens to me. I do not need to plot my movements through public space in order to avoid being sexually harassed, or to mitigate sexual harassment. (More.)

45. On average, I am not interrupted by women as often as women are interrupted by men. (More.)

46. I have the privilege of being unaware of my male privilege.

Credit: http://amptoons.com/blog/the-male-privilege-checklist/

geidiprimes-deactivated20200216

Mike Hadreas talking truth

negromanticshade-deactivated201

what the fuck does this even mean

magicallybitchless

What this means is that because Eminem is a white male his offensive and hotheaded behavior was treated as performance art/ social critique, it was treated as brilliant and all apart of his complicated persona, which was the mad scientist, because Slim Shady vs Marshall Mathers, the Dr. Jerkyl and Hyde. When Eminem was offensive, hotheaded, abrasive it was him being Slim Shady, he was being an artist.

When Azealia Banks does it, she is treated as the bitter black bitch, who is always sounding off. When Azealia does it, she isn’t seen as complicated, or brilliant or given any of the character depth and space of being “an artistic genius” like Eminem. She’s just black and salty.

Even though both have done offensive things, both have said the f-word, and both have been called out, one is still championed and worshipped as one of the saviors of hip-hop, and the other is dismissed and is pushed out of hip hop, and is denied the same agency.

foreverpruned

Thanks for the clarity

timoni

YouTube comments aren’t “just the Internet.” They’re not the product of a group of otherwise nice guys who suddenly become evil when they wear a veil of anonymity. YouTube comments are actually a nightmarish glimpse into the sexist attitudes that define the fabric of our own existence in the “real world,” a world that, like YouTube, is owned and dominated by men. The most terrifying gift that the Internet has given us is that it’s shown us how men honestly perceive the world: as a place where women exist exclusively for their sexual pleasure.

Samantha Allen’s For women on the Internet, it doesn’t get better, in the Daily Dot.

I was talking with someone recently about how much harassment on the internet bothered me: not just the implied violence, but the fact that anyone could think such things, much less feel it was okay to say them, anonymous or not.

The person I was talking to, a guy, shrugged it off: “Teenaged boys just think all kinds of horrible shit. Their brains go to dark places.”

Assuming this is true, my question now is, *why* do they go to dark places? What is going on in our socialization processes that lead to this? It seems we don’t unlink the deep, evolved ties between sex and violence, for a start, but surely there is more here.

(via timoni)

ethiopianunorthodox

THIS

penkwin

OMG so this.

thepeoplesrecord

Columbia student will carry her mattress until her rapist exits school September 2, 2014

While most students at Columbia University will spend the first day of classes carrying backpacks and books, Emma Sulkowicz will start her semester on Tuesday with a far heavier burden. The senior plans on carrying an extra-long, twin-size mattress across the quad and through each New York City building – to every class, every day – until the man she says raped her moves off campus.

“I was raped in my own bed,” Sulkowicz told me the other day, as she was gearing up to head back to school in this, the year American colleges are finally, supposedly, ready to do something about sexual assault. “I could have taken my pillow, but I want people to see how it weighs down a person to be ignored by the school administration and harassed by police.”

Sulkowicz is one of three women who made complaints to Columbia against the same fellow senior, who was found “not responsible” in all three cases. She also filed a police report, but Sulkowicz was treated abysmally – by the cops, and by a Columbia disciplinary panel so uneducated about the scourge of campus violence that one panelist asked how it was possible to be anally raped without lubrication.

So Sulkowicz joined a federal complaint in April over Columbia’s mishandling of sexual misconduct cases, and she will will hoist that mattress on her shoulders as part savvy activism, part performance art. “The administration can end the piece, by expelling him,” she says, “or he can, by leaving campus.”

As painful as I know the constant reminder of attending school with her rapist must be, I’m glad she won’t be the only one forced to remember. I hope the rapist drops out immediately…or better yet, I hope he faces the justice he deserves.

But I think the real nugget is that I wasn’t like a lot of the other presenters: I wore a dress, heels, and a big necklace. I was incredibly articulate and poised. I wasn’t a stand-up act or rough around the edges. I think that this set off a red flag to these men: “There is something different here. Different is bad.” Is it possible that the only frame of reference they have for a strong woman in front of an audience, speaking articulately, is their school teachers?

On unsolicited criticism - Lara Swanson

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