Squirrel :3 @malicioussquirrel - Tumblr Blog

sexy-people-contests-2026

Tumblr Sexyman Contest 2026 Round 1 Part 44

Elias Bouchard (The Magnus Archives)

Jesus of Nazareth (the bible)

Remaining time: 4 days 18 hours

Elias art by @herodzn

Jesus art by @wolfythewitch

#Yeah ok sure why not

thebigbiwolf

current aesthetic: cute english teacher who’s high key banging the history professor

satanstrousers

current aesthetic: the history professor

louceph

current aesthetic: all of the lights and windows in grandpa’s house disappeared

hydrattan

I was feeling agitated and artblocked yesterday so I decided to give my brain a rest by watching TV and then the next thing I knew these were in front of me

shamebats

Oh come on lady, you can't deny a man his gaycation

shamebats

You must surrender yourself mind, body and soul to the gaycation or be destroyed

shamebats

Someone on reddit already suggested a sapphibbatical

the-haiku-bot

Someone on reddit

already suggested a

sapphibbatical

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

mechanica1-hands

how could you leave out the best part—the aquarium bit

shamebats

"become a fish" (gay)

ladyananas

men will jump through an entire circus' worth of hoops rather than admitting they're bi

helpless--romantics

theivorybilledwoodpecker

The level of mental hoops that guy had to jump through to say to his wife, "No, honey! Of course I wouldn't be cheating on you! Sex during gaycations doesn't count!"

theivorybilledwoodpecker

Holy fucking shit! It gets trippier!

I mean, I feel horrible for the OP and her SIL...but "surrender to the gaycation" made me laugh way more than I should have.

emilynyaaa

this is an insane story

flickering-leaves

“Some men never return”

Helpppppp 😭

brightlotusmoon

harperhug

Um…here’s the reddit link? I’m speechless.

handageddon

Don't worry honey, all the other men on gaycation aren't real people and they stop existing after. Hey, where's all the homophoboa coming from suddenly?

mananabuffins

That's the beauty of the gaycation!

authoratmidnight

It get wilder. I only found out about this b/c of a youtube video reading the Gaycation post but, this isn't even the first one.

7 years ago someone posted this-

And 5 years a different user posted this-

What is happening with these people??? What weird ass cult did they find??

catboy-artist

I read the shithead guy’s rambling in Nagito Komaeda’s voice

animentality

rylances-deactivated20170212

did the beat go off?

i nut and then my meat go soft?

rylances-deactivated20170212

her daughters got the whooping cough?

rylances-deactivated20170212

i brake and let the children cross?

pipermintz-deactivated20260402

I feel like if humans swallowed rocks like birds do to help grind up food we'd have so much fun with it.

Can just imagine all the girlies on tiktok going "I know this is a bit controversial but I honestly love using limestone as a gastrolith. Not only can you readily forage it but they are just so pretty when smoothed out after regurgitating them"

and then all the comments would be like " girl 😭 😭 calcite dissolves in stomach acid!! Just use quartz if you want a pretty gastrolith like 💀"

eternalfarnham

I like this site. Y’all just shotgunning counterfactual timelines

byjove

It would be kind of fun to have a medical dramamedy show where people (patients and people in the medical field) could submit their craziest experiences with the medical system and those plotlines and patient stories could be dramatized and woven into a cohesive narrative with any additional profits from the show going to pay off medical debt.

byjove

Plotline A: Patient is suffering from a near fatal case of hypothermia after passing out in the snow drunk and laying there all night until his 13 year old nephew discovered him in the morning, said 13 year old managed to transport his druncle to the hospital on a snowmobile but the rest of the family cannot make it there due to road conditions.

Plotline B: A live rat fell through the ceiling halfway through an emergency appendectomy, causing the surgeon to startle and rupture the patient’s appendix. Infectious disease is very interested in the situation due to the risk of zoonotic infection. The hospital’s legal department is also very interested in the situation.

foxglovedforest

Hey OP what happened to you

byjove

I’ve been chronically ill since the age of 14 and I enjoy eavesdropping

zillychu

wait can I submit something

hagnanimous

evilnicegirl

i was abandoned as a baby & raised by a wild pack of cigarettes

motherblackcap

I heard it was that time of year again.

picsthatmakeyougohmm

5nkc7hdrl-deactivated20180324

cr-familiar-faces

Windex isn’t carbonated

cr-familiar-faces

killin-the-machine

The use of the princess bride implies that they’re both windex

pinsir

it also implies that op developed immunity to windex

sexy-people-contests-2026

Happy pride to the op with immunity to windex

jenny-holzer

time-traveling-fetus

As much debate as there is about tone tags, 90% of the issues would be solved by just typing the word. Like instead of typing /gen or /hj you can just write (genuine) or (handjob) and you'll be doing pretty much the exact same thing.

time-traveling-fetus

Of course I personally think it's less awkward to use some rudimentary language skills to form actual sentences and phrases. They don't even have to be complicated. Like "Genuine question, why are you doing that?" Or "I'm being serious. Stop that." Or "I'm going to jerk you off now."

fortunechaos

I whole wholeheartedly agree with you on this matter OP. I do feel like it's often forgotten in this discourse that tonetags originated on Twitter where they had to get around a constrictive character count for tweets. I think how we got here makes a lot more sense when you consider the process otherwise of trying to fit an entire handjob in 280 characters.