Eppy's Pen

"Bigger than Elvis, boys!" (Indie RP Blog for Brian Epstein.)

[managedbyepstein]

Hey there- it’s been a minute. I’m not even sure any of the followers of this blog are still active. Maybe I’m just screaming into the void.

I turned 32 recently, and it’s caused me to think about Brian (and this blog) more than I have in a long time.

When I rped on this account, I was an unhappy, closeted 19 year old, with very little direction in my life or career. In an odd way, I think that this blog helped me figure out something about myself, or to accept things that I wasn’t quite ready to accept.

I’m happy to say a very different person now than I was back then. I’ve been gay married for 8 years. I’m the youngest member of the board of my city’s Pride festival. I foster LGBTQ teenagers. Professionally (and this part is a bit ironic), I manage artists. I have an MBA.

Life hasn’t always been easy, and there are still things I struggle with. But I feel like in some strange way, that this blog was a part of what I’ve been able to build over the past 13 years.

So, thanks. To all of you, and to Brian as well.

Much love,

the mun ❤️

[managedbyepstein]

//I think I’m going to put this blog on hiatus, at least for the time being. Part of the reason I started it was to help me come to terms with myself, and well, I’ve come a long way in the past year and a half. I also find my real life is encroaching on fiction more and more, and therefore writing Brian, for me, is much less imaginative than it used to be.

Thank you all for a wonderful year and a half <3 I may be back again in a few months or so, if the muse is persistent, but at the very least I’m going to take a little break.

That being said, I started a new blog a few weeks ago in order to remain in the Beatles rp community- so I won’t be going away completely. You can find me here.

Thank you all for your support. :)

-the mun

[managedbyepstein]

What Goes On- Starter for xnowhere-man

“You know Paul, I was reading the paper this morning, and a fellow wrote an article explaining that you had in fact died several months ago. Tell me, when were you planning on informing the rest of the band?”

[xnowhere-man]

“Heh. Fancy tha’,” McCartney quips, plush lips quirking as they negotiate a cigarette.

Easing back into the chair, he eyes a steaming kettle of coffee at the other end of the table but remains resolute with his chosen vice.

“Well if I said anythin’, I wouldn’t be a very convincing fill in, y’know?”

[managedbyepstein]

“Perhaps...” Brian chuckled, shaking his head. “But the article went on to say that the duplicate had been hired by... of all people... a Mister Brian Epstein!”

“As I don’t recall this transaction, I’m beginning to think... I may have a double as well!”

“You know, it’s really incredible what these fans think up...”

[managedbyepstein]

What Goes On- Starter for xnowhere-man

“You know Paul, I was reading the paper this morning, and a fellow wrote an article explaining that you had in fact died several months ago. Tell me, when were you planning on informing the rest of the band?”

[managedbyepstein]

A Rock and A Hard Place- Starter for tame-the-fox

[managedbyepstein]

So he was inviting himself to stay overnight. Brian quirks a smile at the thought. That was certainly… promising. “If your flight isn’t too early, we can have breakfast together before I attend my conference. I found a nice little cafe yesterday, right across the street. Lovely jam tarts.”

The idea of James’ manager accompanying him rather surprises Epstein. Dean had said this trip was something of a holiday- so why on earth would the fellow be following him around like a moth to a light? That hardly sounded pleasant at all…

“Now on the subject of your manager, I suppose you ought to tell him that you met a stunning blonde, and she insisted you stay the night.”  A light chuckle. “I don’t suppose most men would argue with that sort of thing, you know.”

A moment of silence, as Brian’s laughter dies off in the night wind. He suddenly grows very serious. “I’ll do everything in my power to ensure that this isn’t a one night endeavor.” He rises to his feet, greeting Dean’s lips with a light kiss on the way up.

“Now, if you’ve had enough of the cake- I’m quite looking forward to sharing a good night’s rest.”

[tame-the-fox]

“Yeah, I found a real stunner alright,” Dean gushes back,his dimples unwavering as their lips subtly smack, “a real class act tease too.”

Jimmy pinches Brian’s chin between his thumb and forefinger,abandoning their wares as he starts back towards the roof hatch. The actor is soaring, surpassing cloud nine, almost ready to tell his manager to shove it and he’ll return to the states when he’s good and ready. None of these musings are realistic but the rebellion feels good for his claustrophobic spirit.

And then Dean turns suddenly, smirking at Brian before he starts sprinting towards the ledge of the building. With his heart bursting out of his chest, he brushes past the other and clears the edge, dropping a few feet onto the fire-escape below. The kitchen and the ballroom may still be crowded after all; it’s not worth being caught this late in the game. Despite the horror these few initial moments may instill in Epstein, this truly is the safer way back into his hotel room.

With a maniacal grin still plastered over his features, he holds his breath, lingering on the rusted structure as he stares back up at the building.

[managedbyepstein]

Brian cries out after Dean’s sudden jump, fearing for the other’s life. Did he- oh god. The manager runs trails Dean’s footsteps, in a vain attempt to stop the actor.

“James!”

He rushes forward to the edge of the roof, expecting to see a mangled corpse six stories below. Epstein’s heart is still beating in his ears when he remembers- the fire escape. And there’s James- smiling, safe just 6 feet below, peering up at him.

“You- you nearly gave me a heart attack! Oh god- I thought, I thought you had died!”

After a moment to settle himself, Brian follows Dean onto the fire escape, taking his time to descend the ladder as it was intended. The manager is still a bit shaky from the incident and he wipes his soggy hair out of his face.

“Well now- shall we?”

[managedbyepstein]

//I’m missing having more activity on this blog. Like for a starter?

[sxurmilksea-deactivated20200709]

(Managedbyepstein): "Are you quite sure you are prepared for this tour, George? You know- I've spoken to authorities in New York, and they're expecting quite a crowd at the airport tomorrow. This American debut- I do believe is going to be quite important to your continued success- and therefore it's vital that you and the others perform at the top of your ability."

     “We will, we will…“ George practically sighs out, giving a dismissive hand-gesture. It wasn’t that he didn’t care, he just didn’t think they had anything to worry about. The band would preform as they always did, and it was bound to make the Americans react the same as everyone else.

     Though, he could tell there was anxiety in Brian just by the use of his words. Hoping to give some aid, he continues on. “Don’t worry, I’m sure the Americans will be pleased. We’ll just do what we always do, yeah?”

     “So, yeah. I’m sure I’m ready.” Lastly, he nods his head with a reassuring smile, hoping that will get the man feeling more at ease.

[managedbyepstein]

“Well as long as you’re quite sure…”

Epstein picks at one of his immaculately neat fingernails, deep in thought. “You know, I only hesitate on this because… well, I strongly believe that a successful manager ought not to cultivate his own image by giving interviews or appearing on television. He ought to focus entirely on cultivating the images of the artists he promotes. Though, if you think my appearance on this program would help the band in some form or other, I would agree to it.”

[sxurmilksea-deactivated20200709]

“That’s silly,” George admits, leaning back in his chair. “You shouldn’t give up your own fun because of if you think it’s better for the band or not. Whether this works or doesn’t, if you wanna do it, you should do it. Not like there’s any shortage of television programs for us four to go on, anyway.” Both his shoulders and eyebrows raise before his arms cross over his chest, just taking a new and more comfortable position in his seat.

[managedbyepstein]

“You know, the way they explained the program to me, I am to answer questions based on my career. However, as the show is taped in front of an American audience, I doubt there will be much hesitation as to what I do once I open my mouth. After all, musicians seem to be the only British export the Americans care about these days!” A light chuckle follows. It’s a joke, but the words ring a bit truer than perhaps Epstein had intended. After all, it seemed, not even the Queen herself got so much airtime on foreign soil! 

[sxurmilksea-deactivated20200709]

(managedbyepstein): "Boys? Are you alright? I heard a crashing noise..."

“WE’RE FINE YES WE’RE FINE WE DIDN’T BREAK ANY FIGURINE THAT WAS EXPENSIVE OR ANYTHING SO DON’T COME CHECKING ON US OR ANYTHING –”

[managedbyepstein]

“They don’t want to help? Really? Are you quite sure?” Brian frowned, raising an eyebrow in surprise. Why, he would have thought that the two would jump at the chance to improve their group as a whole.

If what George was saying was true, could it be a sign that John and Paul were beginning to break off from the rest of the group? Goodness, Epstein certainly hoped not! “Well in any case, the roast ought to be ready. I asked Lonnie to have it finished by 7, though he hasn’t yet emerged from the kitchen, so things may still be up in the air. ” The manager plucked an old fashioned waiter’s bell from the table, and rang it once. It was an out of fashioned way to do things perhaps, but it was efficient.

[sxurmilksea-deactivated20200709]

“Well, I, uh, I asked Paul to help, but he said he was busy, so I called up John. He didn’t seem too keen on the idea, but he did help, so I suppose it’s alright. Maybe I just caught them at a bad time.” Although it was obvious neither wanted to help, George just couldn’t bring himself to admit it, and it didn’t seem the other wanted to think it true either.

Harrison’s brown eyes watched as Brian rang the bell. Things really had changed from his home, and it hit him hard now. Writing songs and having people specially make meals for him. It almost felt like he was in a movie. “Yeah,” he spoke quietly, looking back up to the man.

[managedbyepstein]

“I see.” Epstein cleared his throat somewhat awkwardly. George seemed uncomfortable all of a sudden, and Brian really wasn’t sure what that meant. “Well I suppose-” His words were cut short by a tall man making his way into the dining room, balancing a rather large slab of beef garnished with a portion of potatoes and a selection of roasted vegetables. It was more than enough food for four or five, nerveless two.

Brian smiled. “Ah! Goodness, that does look delicious. Lonnie, if you wouldn’t mind setting it down just there, in the center... you can retire for the night, if you’d like- I really don’t mind cleaning up.”

Wishing the fellow a good night, Epstein stands to cut the roast. But again, he spots the unease in Harrison’s eye.

“George... are you quite alright?” 

[mrepstein]

Brian Epstein portrait [x]

[managedbyepstein]

URL Song Tag

the rules: spell your url with song titles, then tag some people

I was tagged by: @sxurmilksea

man who sold the world- David Bowie across the universe- The Beatles no particular place to go- Chuck Berry ain’t no grave- Johnny Cash god save the queen- the Sex Pistols early days- Paul McCartney dancing in the street- Martha and the Vandellas bohemian rhapsody- Queen you don’t own me- Lesley Gore end of the world- Herman’s Hermits pet sematary- the Ramones saturday night’s alright for fighting- Elton John tangled up in blue- Bob Dylan eve of destruction- Barry McGuire i got you babe- Sonny & Cher nights in white satin- Moody Blues I tag: @marriageisagamble, @xnowhere-man , @paulie-mcsassy and whoever else hasn’t already been tagged...

[managedbyepstein]

A Rock and A Hard Place- Starter for tame-the-fox

[managedbyepstein]

Brian cannot help but blush following the rather salacious gesture. James must  think him such a fool, blushing as often as he is! But despite concern over appearances, Epstein manages to crack a smile.

“The wedding party downstairs would be quite mortified, I should think, if they found out what you were doing with their cake!”

A beat as the young manager studies the man in front of him. Goodness, he really is gorgeous.The light tinge of freckles contrasted with sandy hair- Brian knows he ought to count himself lucky that he at least is able to spend a single evening in the film star’s presence. But in truth- he wants more.

“It’s a shame… you know, that you and I can’t have more time together. Now this may sound silly, but James- I’d very much like to get to know you better. Emotionally as well as… physically. But, our with our situations the way they are… it’s quite a shame.”

[tame-the-fox]

“Ahhh,they’re just a bunch of squares,” he remarks, his utterance complemented by a coquettish wink.

His own finger dips into a mound of butter cream as he ruminates over Brian’s following statements, sucking idly on his digit as he listens. Epstein’s words strike at his core and perhaps if he had indulged in more champagne, he would have suggested running away together. In truth, the thought still crosses his mind but there’s not enough liquid courage in him to allow himself to articulate it. 

“Well…maybe we ought to quit thinkin’ about it,” Dean eventually sighs, his brows drawing into a trademark arch, “and we’ll just promise each other right now that we will  see each other again. How about that? So there won’t be anything to be sad about anymore. And if you don’t mind, I’d like to spend the night. I’ll just drive to the airport tomorrow morning and meet my manager there. Boy, he’s gonna tear me up, haha!”

Suddenly an expression of seriousness dominates his features and he quiets for a moment before his lips part to speak.

“So,what do you say, huh? Promise you’ll see me again?” he inquires,his eyes glistening earnestly and his lower lip threatening into a pout.

[managedbyepstein]

So he was inviting himself to stay overnight. Brian quirks a smile at the thought. That was certainly... promising. “If your flight isn’t too early, we can have breakfast together before I attend my conference. I found a nice little cafe yesterday, right across the street. Lovely jam tarts.”

The idea of James’ manager accompanying him rather surprises Epstein. Dean had said this trip was something of a holiday- so why on earth would the fellow be following him around like a moth to a light? That hardly sounded pleasant at all...

“Now on the subject of your manager, I suppose you ought to tell him that you met a stunning blonde, and she insisted you stay the night.”  A light chuckle. “I don’t suppose most men would argue with that sort of thing, you know.”

A moment of silence, as Brian’s laughter dies off in the night wind. He suddenly grows very serious. “I’ll do everything in my power to ensure that this isn’t a one night endeavor.” He rises to his feet, greeting Dean’s lips with a light kiss on the way up.

“Now, if you’ve had enough of the cake- I’m quite looking forward to sharing a good night’s rest.”

[musingmemes]

three word starters

“i’ll do it.”

“please just don’t.”

“i hate you.”

“i love you.”

“you love me?”

“please stop it.”

“i can’t breathe.”

“just go away.”

“you’re an ass.”

“you’re a bitch.”

“don’t leave me!”

“don’t walk away.”

“stay with me.”

“i’m begging you…”

“for fucks sake…”

“clean this up!”

“please kiss me.”

“get off me!”

“you are despicable.”

“are you okay!?”

“don’t do this.”

“please shut up.”

“are you drunk?”

“don’t forget me.”

[managedbyepstein]

//Just a reminder

I’ve seen a lot of new Beatle blogs cropping up lately and as I usually do I think it’s a good time for a reminder that Brian is always open to rping. In fact, if you like this post, I’ll write you a random starter.

[managedbyepstein]

I’m Looking Through You- Starter for PlasticBeatle

“Now John- I really haven’t the slightest idea. Perhaps you ought to ask someone else…”

[rearctor-deactivated20170121]

“I thought ye’ were supposed to know everything, Bri.” John couldn’t help but smile from ear to ear. Nothing made him happier than teasing the poor manager, it was even better when he knew that the man had a thing for him. “Come on and tell me!”

[managedbyepstein]

“I’m a manager John, not a tour guide. If you’d really like to find out about the clubs here, I’d suggest you speak to that nice young lady who checked us into our rooms. She, I’m sure, would be quite willing to accompany you to any venue of your choosing.”

Brian had heard his fair share of stories regarding New York City’s vibrant gay nightlife. It was rollicking they said- quite beyond anything happening in Europe. Frankly, Epstein was eager to see for himself if the rumors were true. But that didn’t mean he was willing to subject himself to John’s incessant taunts.

[managedbyepstein]

High With A Little Help From My Friends- Starter for Desolation-Row-Dylan

“And you’re quite sure this will have no… ill effects?”

[desolation-row-dylan-deactivate]

“Naw, don’t worry. Everyone’ll be fine, I’ve already smoked an entire gram and I’m fine. The worst you’ll get is hungry, and we can just order room service for that.”

[managedbyepstein]

“Well, so long as the boys will be back to their normal selves in time for tomorrow night’s show…” To be quite honest, Brian wasn’t particularly sold on the idea altogether. After all, what if word got out that the Beatles took drugs of all things?

And… there was one more very important thing to address…

“Bob,” Epstein spoke quietly, pulling the folk singer aside. “This doesn’t react poorly with medication, does it?”

[desolation-row-dylan-deactivate]

“Don’t /worry/, man,” Bobby said, waving his arm dismissively. “It’s a plant, nothin’ bad is gonna happen to you ‘cept you’ll get real hungry.” He could sense Brian’s anxiety over the issue. “And the press can’t say nothin’ bout drug use. Shakespeare smoked pot, you know. All the greats did. You can’t be great without somethin’ in your system.”

He grinned lopsidedly at the other man, the amount of the substance in his system evident as he began giggling uncontrollably.

[managedbyepstein]

“Indeed.” Bob’s last words hit Brian a bit closer to home then perhaps the guitarist had realized.

Epstein cleared his throat awkwardly, waving the thought away. “Well I suppose, if you say it’s harmless, it would be quite alright to partake. Would you like me to order refreshments before we begin? This hotel does seem to have quite the impressive wine list…”

[desolation-row-dylan-deactivate]

“Wine? I love wine! Drinks all around, dude,” Bobby exclaimed, grinning. “Order all the wine, we can have a taste test. Oh, where are those rapscallions, by the way? The Beatles?”

[managedbyepstein]

“Their photo shoot is running a bit late…” Brian said, reaching for the telephone to order the refreshments. “Hopefully they’ll be here shortly. They’re all very excited to meet you, you know.”

Brian turned to the phone to place their order. A nice Bordeaux, a bottle of Lancers, and a nice cheese plate. Of course, if the boys were able to make it in time, he could always order more. 

“There now, that should be enough, don’t you think?”

A pause.

“So, how do you smoke one of these… is it similar to a cigarette?”

[desolation-row-dylan-deactivate]

“Oh good, in the meantime we can get baked,” Bobby said excitedly, his voice childish. 

“Well, essentially yes. There’re many different ways to smoke, ya know. You could use a pipe or a bong, which are more economical but you can’t just bring a pipe or a bong with you everywhere ‘cause they break super easily. They’re usually made of glass you see, so unreliable. Besides, you can roll a joint with any kind of paper. Newspapers, bibles and phone book paper usually work the best. But yeah, you just smoke it like a cigarette,” He explained quickly, shrugging.

 “Just watch me.” Bobby pulled a joint and a lighter out from his inner coat pocket, lit it and stuck it in his mouth. “You’ll cough a bit the first time though, but it ain’t nothing to worry about.”

[managedbyepstein]

Epstein nodded, committing the information to memory. Most of what Bob had said was quite new to him. Of course, he had heard of marijuana and it’s effects from the men down at the bars, but it simply wasn’t a common substance in Liverpool.

“Well if we need any more paper, I have today’s news somewhere around here. After all, I don’t think the hotel would be too pleased with us tearing up their Bible…” 

The manager sniffed, catching a whiff of the joint’s sickly sweet odor. “Well now, that’s a very peculiar scent for a cigarette, isn’t it? You know Bob, and I’m sure you’ll laugh at this, but when you arrived, I had assumed the scent on your clothing was some sort of cologne!”

[desolation-row-dylan-deactivate]

“Bible schmible,” Bobby said, laughing at his own ‘joke’, waving his hand dismissively. He looked up from the joint, raising his eyebrows. “Cologne?”

Bobby scratched his head, pausing momentarily. “Huh, guess all that incense ain’t doing its job… But yeah, I love how it smells. I guess it could make a pretty nice cologne, I don’t even hafta try and use cologne anymore now that you’ve brought this too my attention,” he laughed, running a hand through his hair. “I smoke so much of this 'n cigarettes that the smell is now permanently engrained into my clothing and skin. ’s fuckin’ groovy, man.”

[managedbyepstein]

Epstein accepts the joint and studies it momentarily before bringing it to his lips. As promised, a burst of coughing follows.

Brian rubs his eyes, trying to rid himself of the strange taste. “Goodness, that’s not particularly pleasant, is it?”

He glances down at the strange cigarette, then back to Bob. "You know, I ... I can’t say I really feel any different. How much do you have to smoke before it takes effect?”

[managedbyepstein]

I’m Looking Through You- Starter for PlasticBeatle

"Now John- I really haven’t the slightest idea. Perhaps you ought to ask someone else...”

[managedbyepstein]

A Rock and A Hard Place- Starter for tame-the-fox

[managedbyepstein]

 Epstein watches the other man, an eyebrow raised in surprise. It was strange… James, it seemed, was quite interested in extending this as well. It really had been a wonderful evening, but well-Brian had rather assumed that Dean was ultimately more interested in his fellow film stars than middle managers from industrial Britain.

Brian seats himself next to the other shaking his head. “Well, I’m sure you’d make quite the matador. And you never know, someday perhaps my little shop will afford me so much money, that I’ll be able to holiday in America! ”

He glances down at the pastry between them. The cake looks quite tasty, the bride and groom clearly spared no expense on their guests.

“Well, in essence it is just a regular cake. It’s the sentiment that makes it a special treat, you know, the fact that two people have been brought together to share in a special day…”

He trails off, voice wavering ever so slightly. Without a second thought, Epstein reaches towards the cake and scoops off a portion of the icing with one finger, bringing it to his own mouth.

“Have some- it’s buttercream.”

[tame-the-fox]

Judging by the abundance of starched collars and pleats, James nearly believes that he and Brian may have very well been the most exciting thing about that wedding. Perhaps for an iota of a moment, they breathed life into something mundane and conventional.

This is a tragically shallow thought not even he has the gall to share; but somehow what’s transpiring on this rooftop seems more natural and raw that the on-goings in the ballroom. And perhaps it is merely jealousy and resentment for structure he could never maintain. As hopeless of a romantic as he is, Dean is also quite cynical of love and all of the formalities…and how rigid its standards seem, even in America.

“Yeah- yeah I guess so,” Dean chuckles timidly, far more interested in the digit betwixt Brian’s lips.

With a menacing smirk, the hand that is not grasping the saucer snatches Brian’s and he plunges his companion’s finger into the icing once more. When the entire girth of his lover’s index has been slathered in the sweet confection, he brings the plighted appendage towards his own lips. Brows furrowed with pale eyes penetrating directly into the adjacent stare, he urges Epstein’s finger through his simper and past his teeth.

[managedbyepstein]

Brian cannot help but blush following the rather salacious gesture. James must  think him such a fool, blushing as often as he is! But despite concern over appearances, Epstein manages to crack a smile.

“The wedding party downstairs would be quite mortified, I should think, if they found out what you were doing with their cake!”

A beat as the young manager studies the man in front of him. Goodness, he really is gorgeous.The light tinge of freckles contrasted with sandy hair- Brian knows he ought to count himself lucky that he at least is able to spend a single evening in the film star’s presence. But in truth- he wants more.

“It’s a shame... you know, that you and I can’t have more time together. Now this may sound silly, but James- I’d very much like to get to know you better. Emotionally as well as... physically. But, our with our situations the way they are... it’s quite a shame.”