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[uwiguwi]

if you’re reading this

a lump sum of money is on the way to you

[therealsb-valeria-deactivated20]

Works every time 🤷🏼‍♀️

[lazysugar-deactivated20240124]

How do people who use tinder passport for sugaring in other countries proceed to having conversations with these men? 🤔

[onikaahonee]

“A good starter could be first asking why they’re so far away and where they’re located, then proceed to say OH, you were there on x day is probably the reason you matched with them they’ll probably ask when next you’ll be around and you can give a date or say you only go there on invitation depending on the situation.” -@exoticoke

[goodbyeeveryonee-deactivated202]

It’s been killing me how heauxs aren’t using the non-sponsors they have to find their sponsors. You have a man that only takes you to events? Get to one to find your next man. You have a man that only gives you gifts? Make sure you convey to him that you’re unsatisfied so he gives you a gift that will elevate you to a better dick. You have a man that has any bit of knowledge you can use? Use it against him. Don’t sit around waiting for one arrangement to end to magically find another, play these men & make them the reason you find your sponsor. It’s your success on their dime. It’s all about who can get you a better meal ticket; these men are literally disposable.

[misssgia-deactivated20170801]

How to Get a REAL Sugar Daddy

In order to hook a SD you need to look the part. You want big money, you need to LOOK like big money. Now you don’t have to be drop dead gorgeous, but you need to know how to dress for your size, have flawless make up, great hair, and highlight your best features. You should also brush up on your intelligence and use your confidence. A pretty face and body go a long way but if you can’t hold a conversation you’ll probably last long enough to be fucked, and dropped. A degree goes a long way but isn’t necessary if you read up on current events, politics, and finance. And last but not least, invest in your smile and smile!

A SB should always have a few classy pieces in her wardrobe. Think Chanel and Donna Karen. You can even fake it until you make it if you’d like. Just make sure you look slayed. Make up needs to be on point. Classic jeans are nice too depending on the occasion. If you’re a BBW, girdle it up and wear clothes that flatter your appearance. Yes, even fat girls are sugar babies ;)

First figure out how much he actually makes by doing a background check on him. This is obviously for your safety as well as your chance to brush up on any businesses he owns, if he’s married or not, and so on. Make sure you get his full real name. Too many splenda daddies lie just to get unsuspecting SBs to meet up with them.

Get a prepaid cell phone with a text plan or Google voice If you meet a bat shit crazy pot (potential sugar daddy) you dont want this prick knowing your number and harassing you. Get a prepaid account like payoneer for possible future deposits unless you only accept Ca$h money.

IMHO SBs need to discuss the mutual arrangement before meeting. Why meet up for dinner with someone who isnt even going to give you what you want? You’ll have a full belly but you’ll leave disappointed and with empty pockets.

Aim high but be realistic! If he’s a real SD Baller he’s not even going to blink at your offer. This includes fat SBs as well. Do not sell your p*ssy *cough* self short! If a guy wants something bad enough he’ll reach in those pockets to get it. However, don’t go so high to where you turn him off. Practice your negotiation skills before meeting him. Aim for your highest, lowest offer. Ex: You really want $5k a month but you’re willing to take $3k) See what he offers first, then ask for what you want and go from there. In this example you’d ask for $4k. Also, make sure you go over the full arrangement. Will you be getting gifts on top of cash? Will your allowance include shopping and trips? Will you be a jet-set babe or will he only meet up with you when he’s in your town on business? The list goes on.

Choose a nice, upscale restaurant for your first meeting/dinner.Only a SPLENDA daddy would suggest TGIFRIDAYS! Ask that he also provide you with a gift of cash in an unmarked envelope. NO EXCEPTIONS! This isn’t an invitation to meet him at his hotel to f*ck,this is common and expected. $300+ is a good start/parting gift. DO NOT. I repeat, DO NOT meet him after to f*ck. You don’t want $300, you want $3000k a month in your bank account! If he hits it that first night he may as well have hired an escort because he most likely won’t be calling you again, and or your relationship will consist of a pay for play arrangement. We want them coins, girl!

Invest back into yourself. You don’t have to go ham but make sure the make up, hair, and clothing game is on point. I can’t stand to see a otherwise pretty SB with a jacked up weave. NO, MA'AM! He’s not paying you $6k a month to look a hot ass mess. If your beautician is booked you better find a back up.

Safety first! You need to discuss if he’s married, if you’ll be exclusive, if you’ll take BC or use condoms, blah blah. Also, it’s very important to know the current sexual status of your SD. There are some nasty SDs that feel that because they’re made of money they can hop from girl to girl raw spreading shit or they don’t know. Don’t let that be you! If he doesn’t care about his safety, he doesn’t care about yours either. To me, being married to a male thot who is well paid is different from being a SB and potentially screwing up your future. Sugaring is temporary. Wifeys have the potential to be well taken care of after a divorce. SBs are sometimes used up,dumped, and left with “presents” and with nothing to show for it but a funky pussy and a dried up bank account!

Figure out when you’ll expect your monthly allowance. Is he paying for tuition as well? What about cars and condos, etc. Are these things in YOUR name? If not, rethink your arrangement or be okay with temporary borrowing. AKA he “bought” you a benz but it’s in his name. Nah, son!

Save, invest, and spend your money wisely. Instead of having him pay for your rent, have him pay YOU and then you pay it. You never know when daddy is going to back out of the arrangement. There’s nothing worse than a SB with a funky p*ssy, a $10k a month apartment, and $1k in her bank account and nothing else to show for it. Daddies ALL have a shelf life unless you marry them. Make sure your ass is covered when he decides to put you back on the shelf and either go back to wifey or chooses the pretty new shiny SB he met. I actually suggest juggling a FEW SDs and constantly keeping an eye out for more. Unless you are exclusive to a WHALE; A.B.S (Always Be Sugaring!) sounds grammatically incorrect but you get my point.

Play your role. Make sure you keep this persona up. Most SDs are married with very demanding jobs/careers and look to you to be their oasis. They don’t need any emotional vomiting on your end. I’m not saying you can’t be yourself around him/her but it’s better to pretend like you’re perfect, play it until you make it. Nag to your girlfriends, that’s what they’re for, not him. This is a business transaction, an arrangement, keep up your end of the bargain and make that money stretch.

And last but not least. Don’t compare your arrangement or situation to someone else’s. Not every girl out there can be an upscale SB. If you’re comfortable being a Splenda Baby that’s okay, too. As long as you’re happy with your arrangement, that’s all that matters. Some babies don’t want this to be a lifestyle but just want a few bills paid or a few free vacations. That’s okay too but I wouldn’t consider that “sugaring”.

You’re probably wondering where you can find true SDs. I’ll throw you a few bones. This is only a little lesson on sugaring, and I have left quite a few things/places out. Do your homework ladies/gents!

Charity Events Fundraisers Country Clubs High End Hotels (BAR/LOUNGE) Happy Hour at High End Restaurants/Bars (Buy 1 cocktail for yourself and sip it slowwwwwwww)

If you want a Splenda Daddy

Starbucks (some upscale neighborhoods have wealthy guys but most SDs send their assistants to buy their coffee) Sporting Events (depends, you may hook a whale) Regular Bar/VIP Lounge (once I had drinks (tables were full) with two older daddies by mistake who both owned their own business and were both divorced) you can aim low at first and practice if you want. My friend and I moved when we got our own table but it could’ve been easy if I took their numbers. Sugar Daddy Sites (there are a few whales but MOST are spleda daddies wanting to give you $300 a month) I have met quite a few SDs online. I’m talking $5k in your bank account without even ever meeting you SDs but this takes a special hustle.

Hope this helped!

[rinseandrepeatsb]

🗣🗣

[beneficeduvagin-deactivated2019]

Men Expect You To Be: 

-Physically Fit

-Beautiful Hair

-Manicured Nails & Feet

-Shaved

-Well-Dressed

-Kinky

It’s Wrong For A Woman To Expect: 

-Gym Membership Money

-Hair Salon Money 

-Nails Money

-Laser Treatment Money

-Shopping Money

-Lingerie Money & Sex Toy Money

We’re not asking for anything different, we just prefer it to be mandated and a routine basis. I will not cook for a man who is not willing to give me grocery money, Do I take pride in being hoe? Hell yes. I am compensated even when I’m disappointed. 

You don’t know the beauty in having horrible sex with a man, seeing him smile, and then he gives you money for terrible sex. IF YOU DON’T KNOW THAT FEELING DON’T JUDGE. Seeing men’s reactions when they see I have a high standard and I actually know my beauty. Priceless. Men and their delusions.

[lemonaades]

[mhmm-honeybee]

daily reminders from beyoncè.

[annieskywalker]

🚫 Phrases to Avoid Saying to Boost Manifestation

The point of this post is to raise awareness on what kind of pattern of thinking and words we may use during the manifestation process that may cause the process to go slower. These are personal experiences I’ve found while working on manifestations so I thought I’d share. I’ve seen a significant difference in manifestation time because I’ve stopped saying these phrases as much as I can as of lately.

❌ Phrases to avoid:

❌ “I can’t wait” - the universe responds to vibrations and not words necessarily. But if your vibration is representing impatience, or anxiety, rather than excited eagerness and full faith that what you desire is yours, the universe will respond to that and the manifestation process can take longer, thus making you wait. ❌ “I want” - this indicates that what you desire isn’t really yours yet simply because it hasn’t manifested physically. Instead of saying “I want”, practice saying “I AM”. I am loved, I am prosperous, I am successful, etc. Saying it in the present is full confidence that it’s yours already.

❌ “I will” - although you are confident and sure of getting/doing what you desire, “I will” can also indicate doubt or the possibility that you won’t. Again, saying “I am” is more presently active more so than “I will”.

Those are the top phrases I’ve avoided saying out loud, in writing, and in my mind. Of course, this takes practice to undo thinking patterns, but if you are presently aware it can help quite a bit! Feel free to add other things you’ve experienced that can slow the process 🔑 Happy manifesting! 💚

[limperatricedesvices]

I am, I let, I welcome

[unstoppablejezebel]

I attract, I receive, I feel.

[snoozyspice]

Sugaring in 2018

 Listen, babes, sugaring has moved on! As technology, media and laws change, so does the industry to the point where half of the advice we were reading in 2017 is now obsolete! There is a reason why the bowl has been dry and salty recently… all of the Sugar Daddies have left it. 

First of all…

Get the hell off of Seeking Arrangement, What’s Your Price and Miss Travel. Not only will nothing good come from them, they are dangerous. In the US, Seeking Arrangement has been subject to several VICE stings and SBs are being arrested for solicitation and prostitution. 

Now, let’s talk about how the demand for Sugar Babies has changed. SDs have always used us as arm candy, as accessories to show off with. All they used to need was someone young and beautiful to tick this box - and now? The market has been flooded. There’s a different breed of Sugar Baby that is getting work, and she doesn’t use Tumblr or any of those trash websites. Bye bye, Brandon Wade. 

I’m about to let you in on one of the best kept whore secrets of the year: 

Instagram. 

Instagram girls are the new super models that these SDs originally looked for. It sounds unreliable, but bare with me. There are companies and assistant services who actively scour Instagram for girls to be companions to filthy rich men. Luxury concierges will recruit beautiful girls from modelling agencies and from Instagram to attend yacht parties or clubs with their clients. Surely you have seen those accounts of model like girls who always seem to be on luxury holidays with no clear source of income? Well, secret’s out. 

So how do you become one of these girls?

It all depends on how much work you’re willing to put in. At a bare minimum, you need to start working on your Instagram account. Your pictures need to be flawlessly edited, professional or professional looking, and depict a mix of yourself and some “luxury lifestyle” pics (these are easy to fake, with some artfully arranged home cooked food and good lighting). You need to show your face and full body, even if you use a fake name. Stick the word “model” in your bio and you’re good to go. Followers aren’t a huge issue - you can still get clients without many - but to boost your chances you might want to buy a few thousand and some likes, too. Drop your Insta in the replies and you can help each other out by following each other.

The real secret is this: the elite have a very strict circuit of destinations and events that they seek companionship for. You need to target those destinations. 

Obviously, a great way to do this is to hop on a flight - but we can’t all do that. So how do we get around it? Tag yourself in those destinations and wait to be spotted. Keep your private messages open!

The high point in this industry is summer, so here’s a little cheat guide to some good destinations and times: 

The Hamptons, all summer

Saint Tropez, all summer

Dubai, all summer

April - Coachella

May - Cannes, France, during the film festival

May - Monaco, France, during the Grand Prix

July - London, England, specifically for Wimbledon

September - Venice, Italy, during the film festival

So what do these concierges offer when they spot you? Luxury travel, all expense paid trips and thousands a night. Now a warning to some of the more naive babies… this is still sex work. You need to take your security and sexual health seriously, and while they are not all intimate bookings it is less likely that clients (or realistically their assistants) will specify if they are or not. This is not for the faint-hearted or the shy babes amongst us… you might be playing golf with a sheikh one night and find yourself at an orgy on a super-yacht the next. There will be drugs that you may feel pressured into taking. But be prepared and be careful, and this could be the most lucrative hustle of your life! How else can I find a sugar daddy? Not all of us have the look (read: we’re not all skinny model types) or the nerve to be an Instagram party girl. It sucks, but it’s not the end of the world. There are still two big avenues open to us: Escorting/stripping first- I know dozens of girls who have turned regulars into SDs. These men are already comfortable with paying for transactional sex, so are way more likely to make the jump to SD, and there’s none of that “freebie” bullshit to begin with. Plus, you have a steady income to live on until that happens! I know I don’t shut up about it, but switching to escorting was the smartest thing I ever did. Tip - be careful with stripping as so many clubs have rules about meeting customers outside the club. Freestyling - Always faithful, always has its downsides. If you’re comfortable becoming a spoiled girlfriend more than a sugar baby, this is your way to go. I won’t write a guide on this - hundreds exist - but I will say that Tinder is also freestyling because it sets you up for a traditional dating sitch. As always, my inbox is open for advice! xo Arianne 

[ayot4life]

Yo! @staff

Why do all the black hash tags no longer exist?

And yet we still have all of these…

You have some explaining to do staff

[naran-ja-deactivated20161104]

I THOUGHT IT WAS MY PHONE. Black girls doesn’t even fucking work. Please boost this guys! PLEASE!

[paris-xo]

Wtaf?!

[beneficeduvagin-deactivated2019]

So lately whenever my SD and I argue he will get upset and say “ I can cut it off at any time”, recently we were talking and he said men will get mentally sick of a women and not physically. So I asked him if he felt this way and he got angry and continued on with we are not attached and I can cut it off any time. What should I do?

My reaction to that would have been

Do it. End it so I can replace you. You think we can’t both find something new and improved? I don’t do well with that making me feel like I have to overcompensate for the same amount of money. F got cursed out when he did that. I cursed him so bad, he thought I had bipolar disorder. Nah, when you try that “I can replace you,” “You need to kiss my feet,” you need a good ol’ DMX cursing. Fuck you and where you came from. Don’t speak to me like that.

Now to keep it PG (clears throat) “If you really feel like this, then we should end it. I don’t feel comfortable the way you are speaking and honestly I would sleep better if you can tell me how we fix this or end this. Whenever you ready to speak like adults about this arrangement we can but other than that the toleration disrespect has expired today.”

[yo-daddys-my-bitch]

May the 10 of Pentacles bless your account with more money than you can spend. 💵✨

[hermes-is-my-homeboy]

10 of Pentz came thruuu

[violaslayvis]

Omg this actually works!!! Thank you 10 of Pentacles!!!

[borkdork]

I could seriously use this money right now….

[ashashi-corner]

Please give me my refund of 400$ soon…

[hermes-is-my-homeboy]

I feel obligated to reblog this every time it shows up in my dash

[hermes-is-my-homeboy]

No bragging, just 100% floored and grateful. Work hard, maintain a positive attitude, and believe that anything can happen.

[mchashimi]

So I reblogged this exactly a week ago because I thought it was funny and uh lo and behold, a family friend wrote me a big ol’ check just to help me out of a tough financial spot AND my bank refunded me $32 for fees they’d originally taken out. SO UH YEAH. Reblogging this again in hopes that it brings equally good fortune to my followers.

[penprp]

Sure why not? Jobs bring in money and prosperity…

[leradny]

I NEED TO FIX MY CAR DOOR

[getlostpeeves]

It fucking WORKED.

[kezia-kawaii]

give me money

i can’t afford to breathe

[yo-daddys-my-bitch]

May the 10 of Pentacles bless your account with more money than you can spend. 💵✨

[hermes-is-my-homeboy]

10 of Pentz came thruuu

[violaslayvis]

Omg this actually works!!! Thank you 10 of Pentacles!!!

[borkdork]

I could seriously use this money right now….

[ashashi-corner]

Please give me my refund of 400$ soon…

[hermes-is-my-homeboy]

I feel obligated to reblog this every time it shows up in my dash

[hermes-is-my-homeboy]

No bragging, just 100% floored and grateful. Work hard, maintain a positive attitude, and believe that anything can happen.

[mchashimi]

So I reblogged this exactly a week ago because I thought it was funny and uh lo and behold, a family friend wrote me a big ol’ check just to help me out of a tough financial spot AND my bank refunded me $32 for fees they’d originally taken out. SO UH YEAH. Reblogging this again in hopes that it brings equally good fortune to my followers.

[penprp]

Sure why not? Jobs bring in money and prosperity…

[leradny]

I NEED TO FIX MY CAR DOOR

[getlostpeeves]

It fucking WORKED.

[kezia-kawaii]

give me money

i can’t afford to breathe

[missmentelle]

At age 23, Tina Fey was working at a YMCA. At age 23, Oprah was fired from her first reporting job.  At age 24, Stephen King was working as a janitor and living in a trailer. 

At age 27, Vincent Van Gogh failed as a missionary and decided to go to art school.   At age 28, J.K. Rowling was a suicidal single parent living on welfare.

At age 28, Wayne Coyne ( from The Flaming Lips) was a fry cook. At age 30, Harrison Ford was a carpenter.  At age 30, Martha Stewart was a stockbroker.  At age 37, Ang Lee was a stay-at-home-dad working odd jobs. Julia Child released her first cookbook at age 39, and got her own cooking show at age 51. Vera Wang failed to make the Olympic figure skating team, didn’t get the Editor-in-Chief position at Vogue, and designed her first dress at age 40. Stan Lee didn’t release his first big comic book until he was 40. Alan Rickman gave up his graphic design career and landed his first movie role at age 42. Samuel L. Jackson didn’t get his first major movie role until he was 46.

Morgan Freeman landed his first major movie role at age 52. Kathryn Bigelow won the Academy Award for Best Director when she made The Hurt Locker at age 57. Grandma Moses didn’t begin her painting career until age 76. Louise Bourgeois didn’t become a famous artist until she was 78. Whatever your dream is, it is not too late to achieve it. You aren’t a failure because you haven’t found fame and fortune by the age of 21. Hell, it’s okay if you don’t even know what your dream is yet. Even if you’re flipping burgers, waiting tables or answering phones today, you never know where you’ll end up tomorrow. Never tell yourself you’re too old to make it. 

Never tell yourself you missed your chance. 

Never tell yourself that you aren’t good enough. 

You can do it. Whatever it is. 

[susiethemoderator]

Thank You, although I’m not going into the entertainment industry I needed this.

[herhighnessthequeen]

30 Glow Up Challenge

Day 1: Cut out all sodas/juices/energy drinks and switch for tea or water for better sleep, skin, metabolism, and to kill excess sugar cravings.

Day 2: Do 50 squats every day before your shower to get that ass🍑

Day 3: Do a face mask.

Day 4: Paint your nails/toes with a cute ass design💅

Day 5: Make yourself a bomb ass breakfast before starting your day.

Day 6: Clean out your closet and try on shit to configure some cute ass outfits for future reference.

Day 7: Take an epsom salt bath to detox and relax.

Day 8: Buy yourself a new highlighter. Even a cheap one like ELF or Makeup Revolution can ya shit pop✨

Day 9: Take a selfie. Take 10. Take 100. Do your makeup or go natural, and gas yourself up with as many selfies as your heart desires. Y'all have no clue how much this boosts your self confidence.

Day 10: Pick/buy yourself some flowers. Love thyself.

Day 11: Do something different with your hair. Part it a different way, straighten it, curl it, dye it, whatever makes you feel glammed up💆

Day 12: Go for a walk outside. Get that fine ass some fresh air and exercise.

Day 13: Get your eyebrows done, or do them yourself if you prefer.

Day 14: Trim your split ends💇

Day 15: Try out a new lip color💅

Day 16: Go through old makeup and throw out anything unwanted or expired. Keep that vanity fresh.

Day 17: Go to bed early for that young beauty rest💤

Day 18: Go through social media and your phone contacts. Delete/block people you don’t like or want to talk to. Cut that toxicity outta your life.

Day 19: Wear a new perfume, or one you normally don’t wear.

Day 20: Exfoliate ya face with your favorite scrub.

Day 21: Apply coconut oil (to lenghten) or castor oil (to volumize) to your lashes before going to bed

Day 22: Buy or make a lip scrub to get them soft kissers😘 (diy scrub: honey+sugar+olive oil)

Day 23: Buy yourself a cheap, fake little engagement ring to remind yourself that you are married to yourself. It also wards off fuckboys.

Day 24: Stretch properly after you wake up, and before you go to bed.

Day 25: Make yourself a lit ass playlist on spotify or your phone’s music to jam whenever you’re feelin down.

Day 26: Make a fruit salad and gobble that shit up for a healthy snack (melt some dark chocolate and drizzle over it for a little treat)🍎🍓🍇🍉🍍

Day 27: Do some yoga.

Day 28: Wing out ya eyeliner like a bad bitch💁 Use scotch tape as a guide for beginners.

Day 29: Buy yourself a new bra or pair of panties to feel sexy af in💞 Target has cute shit for cheap.

Day 30: Meditate to clear your mind and boost your mood.

[pro-hoeing-blog]

Hoe Tips

Okay so these are tips that can make a hoes life so much easier. Enjoy 💕💕

1. Throw away any shaving cream use coconut butter or oil to shave, than apply oil after you dry off. BAM. NO STUBBLE. NO BURN. IT’S THE SHIT.

2. Don’t use shaving cream or coconut butter for your coochie. Use Johnson’s baby oil instead. You’ll have no razor burn.

3. There isn’t anything wrong with your natural coochie smell, but if you want to taste sweet eat cranberries or pineapple. SHIT WORKS.

4. Stretch marks on inner thighs? Use Vaseline and coconut oil over night EVERY NIGHT to get rid of them.

5. Men’s razors >>> womens razors. Cheaper, closer shave and cleaner.

6. Pee after sex. It’ll help prevent any UTIs. Don’t hold it in. UPDATE: I’ve changed it now, but this used to say pee to stop STIs, that is INCORRECT, and the only thing to stop STIs is a condom. Thank you to @infinitelaughing for correcting me!

7. Carry your own condoms. You’re a strong independent hoe and carry your Trojans proud.

8. If you’re braking out buy tea tree oil.

9. KAT VON D LIQUID LIPSTICKS ARE BLOWJOB PROOF. IT WILL NOT COME OFF. PLUS IT’S MATTE.

10. Matte makeup (foundation, lipstick, eyeliner) all lasts better against sheets for sex.

11. Want longer nails to scratch with? GARLIC ON NAIL BEDS. COCONUT OIL ON CUTICLES. GROW BITCHES GROW.

12. To make eyebrows fuller put on coconut oil before bed.

13. Add ½ cup of apple cider vinegar to your bath. It’ll reset the balance of your coochie’s PH. You’ll feel and smell r8 8/8

14. Run a hot bath. Favourite bubble bath. Soak. EXFOLIATE. When you get out put coconut oil all over your body.

15. Honey + white sugar - lip scrub Coconut oil + brown sugar - body exfoliator

16. Dry feet are nasty af. Soak feet in hot water for 10 minutes before using a pumice stone to get rid of dead skin.

17. For extra soft feet, do above and put on heavy duty lotion, socks and sleep.

18. To hide a hickey. Green concealer all over, foundation and powder. GONE.

19. To remove blackheads use charcoal based soap. And use natural beaded exfoliants

20. If you want your coochie to be BABY SOFT get yoni oil. Shit is magical.

21. If your hair is feeling lifeless massage coconut oil in every night + put in a bun. Wash out in the morning.

22. Put your undies in three categories. 1. I’m getting fucked tonight 2. I could be spontaneously fucked. 3. Getting none today

23. On the days leading up to and after your period use a pad on your fav undies to stop staining.

24. Eyebrows can be on fleek fucking in a forest. Get Anastasia dipbrow pomade. Lifesaver.

25. 6-10 green tea bags in a bath will help energise skin and refresh. Skin will glow and be soft.

26. If you’re about to get dicked down DON’T wear cotton undies. It will trap lint in the crevice of your thighs.

27. Chlorasceptic throat numbing medication helps with deep throating.

28. DRINK WATER. cliché af but keep coochie smelling good and brightens skin.

29. Lemon juice and baking soda will remove any cum stains from clothes. I got you 😏

30. It’s your body. Don’t fucking listen to anyone

31. Shave your coochie under water

32. Put baby oil in your bath - baby soft duck yeah

33. Have a special coochie cleaning day. You’ll not regret it

[kroutonwilcox]

ok this my list of hoe tips and life tips in general

- can’t get ur pussy smooth?? always prickly?? shave diagonally and horizontally instead of up and down, and always use a new blade

- can’t get ur pussy soft?? shave with hair conditioner and massage it in for like 30 seconds before. after u shave, massage with baby oil, and lotion after a shower

- EXFOLIATE. exfoliating is the key to life. mix used coffee grounds with a moisturizing oil (olive or coconut is best). rub that shit all over your legs before you shave until ur hands start to feel funny

- dry feet?? bih me too. rub a fuck ton of regular lotion (or foot cream if u fancy, even Vaseline works) all over your feet and put double socks (or fuzzy socks) on before bed. yass

- this one is the most basic but pls drink water. it’ll clear ur skin, flush out your kidneys to prevent bladder infections, and ur pussy gonna be wet asf

- salt, fat, caffeine, dairy, etc. r gonna make u taste all funky down there. fruits, veggies, and anything w high water content is gonna make u taste fresh/sweet

- smoking and drinking also gonna make u taste funky. and smoking is especially bad for u, so put out the cig babe

- using soap on ur pussy gonna fuck up ur pH bad. the vagina is a self cleaning device, and all u need is a really soft washcloth (or even a cotton shirt) and some water, let ur body do ur thing

- if ur used to wearing tampons and that’s what u find comfortable, use a menstrual cup! very sanitary and will save u a TON of money in the long run

- want a natural lip plumper?? mix a lil bit of cinnamon and honey, and gently rub it into your lips w a soft toothbrush n leave it on for a min. slather on some chapstick n ur plump n soft

- BUY A VIBRATOR. please do it. it will save ur fucking life

- cotton panties or no panties sis. ur kitty needs to breathe and cotton/no panties will prevent bacterial and fungal infection

- got hair on ur face? got rough skin? GURL SHAVE IT! wash your face as normal and pat dry, gently run a clean razor over any areas (cheeks, chin, neck). tone and moisturize like a motherfucker. smooth!

- pubic hair is healthy and good and keeps ur vag clean! don’t shave it unless YOU want to, don’t leave that decision up to ur nasty man

- allow urself junk in moderation. it’ll make making healthy choices easier if u allow urself a little treat every once in a while

- a simple equation for a good meal: vegetable + grain/carb, protein

- do ur fucking homework and do it on time

- rubbing a little bit of petroleum jelly on ur pressure points before spraying perfume will make it last longer

- hair holds onto scents v easily. wanna smell like a goddess????,,, spritz that hair

- kat von d everlasting liquid lipstick is blowjob proof. get messy n be on point!

- urban decay all nighter setting spray is gonna save ur life. it’ll keep ur shit in place when u getting dicked, if u cryin, chokin on dick, w/e u like to do

- if ur having trouble getting wet even after sufficient foreplay, a little bit of water based lube does WONDERS. also won’t deteriorate condoms (oil) or get gritty (silicone)

- need to stretch out ur shoes?? fill two ziploc bags with water and put them in ur shoes. put shoes in the freezer until water freezes solid, and dethaw with a hairdryer. especially effective on leather!

- having problems deepthroating? make sure ur throat is in line with ur mouth, if it’s not the dick won’t go down

- can’t deepthroat at all? cover ur teeth with ur top lip and press ur tongue to the roof of ur mouth while he thrusts. 10/10!

- communication w ur partner during sex will make it a trillion million times more satisfying

- frizzy hair? put conditioner on the tips of your hair (nape of the neck and down) and shampoo right on ur scalp. volumizes without frizzing!

- this one kinda weird but don’t hold ur pee unless u wanna mean bladder infection/UTI

- pee after u masturbate please. u never know what can shimmy up ur urethra, even when ur playin w the little man in the sailboat

- keep a pair of spare glasses with u for when ur contacts dry out. lifesaver

- always keep extra undies, an extra shirt, makeup remover, moisturizer, and comfy shoes in ur car/bag if u can fit all of it

- apply dry shampoo the night before ur gonna need it. it’ll soak up the oil before it sits on ur hair. reapply in the morning n style accordingly

- apple cider vinegar mixed with water works as a good toner if u ain’t got no moneyyyy

- castor oil on ur brows and lashes every night will make them thicker and longer. even just one day will help (bc they will be shiny and moisturized)

ill probs add onto this when i think of more!

[rechbetch-deactivated20220314]

In your 20s, you’re a snack.

In your 30s, you’re a bombshell.

In your 40s, you’re a vixen.

In your 50s+, you’re THAT bitch.

Don’t let gross men and the media make you believe beauty ends in your early twenties.