The View From Here @marcella-the-shell - Tumblr Blog

~you are sent out~

Hey y’all!

I wanted to share a need with you today. As you know, I moved to Western North Carolina to be a part of a church plant. We believe that church is not just an event on Sunday, but the people of God, filled with the Spirit of God, sent on God’s mission. We do our best to live that out through our missional communities and serving our community. But this also means international mission.

Our church is just getting our toes wet in regards to sending. We want to send and to go ourselves. We have members of our church who have been on longterm mission that are committed to building a solid missions ministry. I get to be on our very first church trip to the Bay Area in Northern California!

So here’s what I need: your prayers. This is my church’s first mission trip, this is an opportunity to show our body that the gospel is a need not just in our community and around the world, but in other places in America.

Pray for our team; we are praying for unity, boldness, and bonding

Pray for the Bay Area; we are going to be in an area with a large Afghan population. Pray that the Lord works in the hearts of those we will meet while we’re over there

Pray for the team already there; there are a group of people who are committed to this area and population, working hard at relationships and gaining favor with these folks

Pray for me; the anniversary of my mom’s passing is during our trip. Each year, I become more and more aware of my behavior during this time, so pray for me and my team as we navigate through it this year. I pray that while the enemy might use it as a distraction, the Lord emboldens me to use it as a chance to bring honor and glory to his name!

Ron Weasley and the Battle of the Lies

Okay y’all, I’m going to share what I’ve been learning from the Lord and it is going to carry some very heavy Harry Potter themes and it contains some crucial Harry Potter spoilers. Basically I’m going to be quoting Harry Potter for this blog. Okay great, you’ve been warned so let’s get started.

Ron Weasley is Harry Potter’s best friend. He has five older brothers and one younger sister, all seem to have their lives more put together than Ron (according to Ron). Harry and Ron are also friends with Hermione, who Ron happens to have a massive crush on. Harry Potter happens to be the Boy Who Lived. Ron is often jealous of Harry. Harry gets special treatment, frequently gets himself into hairy situations (pun intended) and winds up saving the Wizarding World, is the youngest Quidditch player at Hogwarts in a century, and gets along with Hermione so easily.

In the very first book, Harry not-so-coincidentally stumbles upon this large mirror called the Mirror of Erised. The inscription on the mirror is written backwards but it says, “I show not your face, but your heart’s desire.” Harry looks in the mirror and sees his whole family, people he will never meet. Soon after, he brings Ron along so that he can share his family with his best friend. But they don’t realize it’s different for everyone who looks at it. Here’s what Ron sees:

“Look at me!” he [Ron] said. “Can you see all your family standing around you?” “No — I’m alone — and I look different — I look older — and I’m Head Boy!” “What?” “I am — I’m wearing the badge like Bill used to — and I’m holding the House Cup and the Quidditch Cup — I’m Quidditch captain, too!” Ron tore his eyes away from this splendid sight to look excitedly at Harry.

Ron’s greatest desire at 11 is to be loved and needed. He thinks he has to be a Quidditch star and champion and Head Boy in order to be loved by his family and the world. Throughout the rest of the books here’s what goes down: Harry, Ron, and Hermione get up to a bunch of dangerous, Wizarding-World-saving adventures, Ron and Harry fight over the glory and attention Harry receives in every book, Ron becomes Gryffindor Prefect over Harry, Ron lives a spectacular life. And yet, he feels like he hasn’t.

In the last book, things are building up for a great, climatic ending. Let me try to explain this for people who don’t read the books: the Golden Trio needs to collect and destroy Horcruxes, which are really powerful and dark items that hold pieces of He Who Must Not Be Named’s soul, in order to ultimately kill him. They spend a majority of the book camping while and wasting time until the big battle at the end and so in order to generate conflict, Ron’s seventh book jealousy-based tantrum ends in his leaving the campsite and his friends.

While we’re sad and while we miss Ron’s perfect comedic timing, Harry gets himself into serious danger while trying to obtain a sword that is powerful enough to destroy Horcruxes. Ron returns out of nowhere and saves Harry’s life. Harry opens the Horcrux so Ron can destroy it, but the Horcrux fights back. It begins to lie to him, saying how worthless he is, his parents don’t love him, Hermione doesn’t love him and all the while, Harry is telling Ron not to listen, to stab the Horcrux.

And here’s the sweet part:

“After you left,” he [Harry] said in a low voice, grateful for the fact that Ron’s face was hidden, “she cried for a week. Probably longer, only she [Hermione] didn’t want me to see. There were loads of nights when we never even spoke to each other. With you gone...” He could not finish; it was only now that Ron was here again that Harry fully realized how much his absence had cost them.

Harry needs Ron! Harry loves this friend he has come to love as a brother. Ron apologizes and Harry responds:

“You sort of have made up for it tonight,” said Harry. “Getting the sword. Finishing off the Horcrux. Saving my life.” “That makes me sound a lot cooler than I was,” Ron mumbled.

I’m just like Ron. When the enemy lies to me and I believe it, I run away. I escape to Netflix where I can binge watch Gilmore Girls or the Office or Parks and Recreation until I’m blue in the face. I escape to Twitter to tweet something stupid and funny that will get favorited and grant me affirmation. I run to my idols. And my idols lie to me, too! I run to them and I love them and they tear me down. I escape even further. A vicious cycle. And so, for lent this year I gave up all of it. Unfortunately, it means that I can’t escape anymore. I have to face the lies, but I’m weak and I believe them. I lose sight of the Truth.

But the Lord had graciously pulled me out of my muck. I heard Him tell me to ask for prayer. I reached out to community. I dove into the Word harder than I already was, I needed Truth so badly, it felt like I would never hear it again. But I heard it and it was good, and my eyes are open again. I’m soaking in the Truth now. I got to go to a conference this weekend where Ellie Holcomb spoke and played music. She talked about lies. How wonderful! I’m reading a book that gets down to the true heart of worship. If you were to be asked, “What do you truly desire?” what would you say? I’d know what I should say, the Sunday school answer for that question has been ingrained into my very being. I think if we looked into the Mirror of Erised, we’d be shocked to see what we’d find.

Gosh, the Enemy can throw the same lies at us for years. I know that I’ve recently been uncovering different lies that I’ve been believing since middle school! Ron’s story is the perfect example of that. He had to physically destroy visual depictions of the lies he’s been believing his whole life in order to one, help save the Wizarding World and two, begin to believe in the truth: that he is loved and wonderful! It’s amazing that his own idols of success began to lie to him, he didn’t think that saving the world was enough. How often do we feel let down by our own idols?

But since we don’t live in a magical world where we can swing a Goblin-made sword that holds Basilisk venom within it at the Enemy, what can we do to fight the lies? Well, first and foremost you need to read the Word! Turn to the Word, which is a sword (Hebrews 4:12)! Swing the Bible at the Enemy. Read the truth of who God is, find those characteristics that directly refute the lie you’re believing. You also ought to be living in community, find people who will pray for you and speak the Truth to you. You were not created by God to be lied to by the Enemy. You were created in love by the Creator of the birds of the sky, the Grand Canyon, the universe!

You are strong enough to battle the lies, dear friend, you have the sword of Spirit on your hip and the power of the Lord on your side (Ephesians 6:17)!

Words in Action

“Preach the gospel daily. When necessary, use words.”

As I have come into ministry, I heard this Francis of Assisi quote a lot, and sometimes I think it’s true. But I’ve heard a lot of people say that the quote is a terrible model for ministry. I’m inclined to agree, especially when you take the meaning of the quote at surface level.

You see, it does imply that you don’t really need to ever use your mouth to preach the gospel. That you can spend your whole life sacrificially loving other people and that’s enough, or you spend your whole life just showing others that Christians are normal people, too. Except, y’all, that is bogus. When you act in those ways for someone who doesn’t know the gospel, how would they know you did that for them because Jesus did it for you? They literally won’t. There’s no foundation in their minds for what you did for them.

But Marcella, what about the platitude, “Actions speak louder than words?” you may ask. Well friends, I firmly believe that’s a true statement. I have been lied to by people whose actions directly contradicted their words and it sucks! So, that being said, let me tell you more about what I think about this Francis of Assisi quote (which, I recently learned was something he didn’t actually say, but was an ideal gleaned from his Franciscan legislation, so I guess I’ll call it the Francis of Assisi misquote).

I think we should focus on the word ‘necessary.’ “When necessary, use words.” Folks, it is always necessary to use words, especially when you “preach the gospel daily” for someone. Ministry is getting to know people and loving them so much that you share the gospel with them. You simply cannot just let people wonder why you just did something for them. If you do something for someone who doesn’t know the gospel and you just leave them to wonder, how the heck would they know what to do next? They literally won’t know what to do next because they have no context for your actions. Imagine someone googling, “My friend did something super nice for me, why?” Like, what? If you just love in action, you are not loving people. You are just doing nice things for people for no reason. But if you say, “Oh I did this because Jesus did this for me first,” that opens a conversation! That makes things so much more clear! It gives the person you’re loving something to respond to, it gives them a resource (you) in learning more about the gospel. That is love. Helping people understand the gospel is vital to ministry.

I’m going to end by saying that I cannot claim to be an expert in ministry. This whole idea is something that I’ve been recently convicted by. I’ve noticed others feeling that they don’t think it’s necessary to use words. I’ve noticed myself feeling like it’s not necessary to use words. Using words to preach the gospel is scary, I know. But we have the Lord behind us. So is it really that scary when we know that the Lord could use our words to incite a change in someone’s heart? Just a thought.

kirstengillibrand

All of Leslie’s compliments to Ann

The Best Two Hours of my Week

Missional Community tonight was an actual, genuine mess. There were 20 people in my two bedroom apartment. 8 of those people were under the age of 5. There was jumping, screaming, shrieking, giggling, running, eating, chatting, water spills, wrestling, sugar highs, bathroom breaks, and honestly everyone was there for less than two hours but it felt like a lifetime.

But when we managed to have a three minute conversation, our MC leader, my friend Brandon, said this, in a nutshell:

We get it into our heads that when we get together as a missional community, we need to accomplish something - whether that’s a study or a discussion or something “productive” to a Christian small group. But when we get together and eat and catch up and let the kids run wild and interrupt, that’s where Christ is working, that’s what life really is. We don’t need to spend our family dinners stressing over the perfect conversation, it should be light, enjoyable, and something to look forward to.

Y’all this is so important to our group because today we had another single person visit the group (as it stands, I am the only consistent single person in the group) and we talked about how our group is great birth control and that the fact that this woman visited was brave. But that is the whole point (well, not bravery and birth control)!!!!!!!!

The point of MC is to be an absolute mess. We had 20 people in my apartment tonight and the quintessential grumpy old man neighbor lives below me! We are doing life together and life is not neat and tidy, especially when children are involved. Life is messy and hard.

I get so much joy in seeing all of those little kids each week. Getting to know them is a treat, but even more so, getting to watch them get to know each other is so wonderful. Their parents are, if it’s possible, more awesome than the kids, and we have just accepted our fate as the MC with a lot of kids.

I can’t wait to see the Lord use our MC, He already has in so many unspeakable ways! I love that we don’t always get to have a group conversation, I’m getting to know everyone around me more and more and growing deeper with them. This is what we are called to do, open our homes to one another and be messy together.

I’m so thankful for this missional community and all of its imperfections. I would never trade to be in a group with people who are in the same stage of life as me, that would be boring.

I’ve gotten to a point in my life where I’m tired of being eloquent about MSA. In my brain, I say things like “MSA sucks” and I tell people that it’s a “poopy disease of horribleness.”

It’s a stupid disease that is full of terrible, bad, and ugly things. My favorite part about MSA is nothing, but if I had to choose something, it’s that my mom refused to let it get in the way of her life. She was a total boss. There’s a term that I want to use for her, but it’s got a few bad words in it.

It’s important to mention that there are people with MSA that think they have a disease like Parkinson’s. Robin Williams had a disease similar to Parkinson’s, but his diagnosis was far worse than MSA. I hate thinking that there are worse things out there than MSA because that means that those things are really terrible. Neurological disease is scary, most of them don’t have cures because there are so many of them. One little difference between two diseases means that they are totally different and separate from each other.

If I had millions of dollars, I’d give it all away to help find a cure for MSA. Heck, if we can’t reach a cure, I’d just like to be able to find out more about it and ways to treat it. It would be awesome to come up with something to care for family members of those with MSA.

There are a lot of wonderful places where you can give your money to. A lot of charities and groups who take care of people, a lot of organizations that research and learn about awful things. But I urge you to look into the MSA Coalition, this is what they say about MSA:

Because of the rarity and severity of the disorder, patients, their caregivers and family members can feel isolated and confused about how to deal with the condition. Likewise, the medical profession may have difficulty in dealing with the diagnosis and treatment of this rare illness. People affected by multiple system atrophy need a support system to help them deal with the many issues.

My family had an incredible network of caregivers, doctors, family members, friends, and pray-ers who took care of us. We were so blessed to have that. Many do not.

#MSA #msa awareness #Cure MSA #MSA sucks

On Spiritual Health

Y’all I have a confession: I have had a pretty rough September.

At some point early in the month, it sunk in that for the first time since 2012, I’m not living with four or five other women who are pointing me to Christ, I’m just living with one other woman that I rarely see. And it became really hard to consistently seek the Lord in Word and prayer. I lost my identity in Christ because my identity in Christ used to included a live-in community, but now my identity is just me.

So right now I’m in a transition. I’ve moved out of meltdown, crisis mode and moved into let’s discover who Christ has made me to be. It’s fun and it’s hard. It’s hard to read your Bible when no one knows that you’re reading your Bible. I’m learning spiritual health is a personal business, and it is not based off of what other people think of you.

Accountability is important, it’s necessary in order to become more like Christ. But it’s not everything. Having people around should not be the reason why you spend time with Christ. I want to be able to wake up every morning and need Jesus.

It’s awesome because I’ve been experiencing that in small doses. I’m not going to be healed overnight, but it is going to take time and effort in order to get back into seeking the Lord consistently. I’m really excited to grow in this season of my life and to seek help from the women around me. My accountability is going to require a lot more intentionality.

What I have to constantly remind myself is the gospel -- that grace has been extended to me and so I need to extend that grace to myself. I have to constantly remind myself that my identity is not in my community or my ministry, but it’s in me. The Lord created me for a purpose and to glorify Him.

This is just a tiny portion of the waterfall that I saw today. (at Triple Falls)

Church Today Was Shambles

Church today was shambles.

If you walked in to my church this morning, you might not have noticed that only five of the six colored lights were working, you may not have heard about how we couldn’t get our pastor’s mic to work in the first service, you might not have noticed the typos on the slides, and you might not have noticed that your chair was a little close to your neighbor’s.

So let me revise my statement: Church today, for me, was shambles.

I walked in and immediately started sweating, the A/C units were on but our space has 40′ ceilings. There was a lot of work to be done, and I had only ever been talked through the set up in this space, I haven’t had to lead people through the set up of the space yet. Last week, things got put away poorly and important items were missing this morning. When our presentation software literally crapped out on me and deleted a very lengthy sermon presentation with just minutes to go before the volunteer service (which is where we struggled with the microphone. We often say that what happens at the volunteer service doesn’t count, which isn’t 100% true, but it is mostly true), I might not have said the ~kindest~ words to the computer.

But y’all, when I finally calmed down (tbh, it happened in stages throughout the day, ending in this very moment) the first time, I remember our pastor’s words to the production and worship team minutes before the service, “Just have fun and worship God.” And now as I’m sitting here, a good 12 hours since a bulk of the shambles occurred for me, I realized that church today was not shambles for everyone else.

So no one probably noticed the lights (but y’all, you’ll never see them so jacked up again, mark my words), and hopefully no one noticed the typos or the fact that some songs are just hard to follow along with, no matter how many times we play them. Everyone noticed their brothers and sisters gathered to worship, to hear wisdom paired with some awesome truth and the gospel, and to witness three amazing women proclaim Jesus as their Savior through baptism (one, a sweet seven year old sister of mine).

I’m grateful to get to help make corporate worship happen. One day, someone who gets baptized at our church will have heard the gospel for the very first time sitting a chair I put out, that’s powerful stuff, y’all!

Who cares that I tripped and have a bump on my shin (and I broke something in the process)?????? NOT ME!!

Today, I forgot to celebrate the gospel. I pray that I will never forget again.