Analysis: 'To Sir Phillip with Love' What do Philoiseers love about Eloise x Phillip?
So on to the final part, what do we like so much about this pairing and this book? This book has the vibe of Persuasion by Jane Austen, Charlotte Heywood x Alexander Colbourne from Sanditon, or Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock in The Lakehouse.
This is for the late bloomers who thought they needed to give up because there was no chance of finding their match and ended up finding the love of their lives.
Eloise was a character I related to. From the strong personality, the rambling and the anxiety about life passing me by, to the prank war with the kids that eventually breaks the ice. I saw myself in her. Eloise is a character with a high opinion of herself but she is very aware that it's not a shared opinion. Which is isolating. Her family loves her but her brothers avoid her and her sisters don't share her interests. No one has the stamina to keep up with her. She's looking for peace and companionship over love.
But then she meets Phillip. He's isolated, has been mostly ignored and passed over most of his life. He is an untapped mine of humor, intellect, tenderness and love. He is desperate for help with his children and his life, it's true, but he is also touch starved and desperate for someone to talk to. he reaches out to Eloise because through their letters to each other he thinks they could find friendship and companionship. Ultimately they want the same things.
What they both end up getting is a champion in their corner who sees them, understands them and appreciates everything they bring. Phillip is a character who has never really had anyone take an interest in him or his interests. Eloise is a person who has always been told that she is too much, too pushy, too talkative. Neither of them are a good fit for society life.
It's the fact that Phillip loves listening to Eloise talk, and genuinely adores pretty much every aspect of her personality. He loves and values how bossy and opinionated she is, he loves how she expresses herself. He loves how intelligent and expressive she is, he loves how capable she is. He is not cowed or put off by these very strong parts of her personality. When her brothers make a joke at her expense he is the first to tell them to knock that shit off, despite the fact that they nearly killed him when they first meet. He loves the color and noise and energy she brings to his life and he nurtures it in her. This is something Eloise has never had with anyone else, not even her family.
For Phillip, Eloise is able to give him a clearer and healthier perspective on his life. The first time anyone tells him "No your father was a monster and I wish he was alive so I could thrash him." is Eloise. The first person to say "I don't think anyone or anything could have made Marina happy," which is a fact (it was beyond his ability as she was clinically depressed with severe postpartum depression) is Eloise. She is the first person he is able to talk to about his marriage and lift the weight of bearing it alone. Eloise is the first person to tell him his children need him and miss him because they love him.
It is something you think is obvious, but he legitimately doesn't realize it. If you look at his history, it makes sense that he would also see his children as people who are stuck with him because there was no one else. His life has also taught him that no matter how hard he tries, he will never be enough, never be what someone needs or wants. When he marries Eloise, he thinks he's gotten them the parent they always deserved, someone better than him. The idea that they genuinely want to be around him as well is not something he has considered.
His children, who are super clever but mischievous and adorable think Eloise hung the moon and basically agree to make her their leader.
Essentially, Phillip and Eloise both become more of themselves but better in a very supportive, loving, wildly passionate relationship. Like they are having sex on the regular. If you think Colin is obsessed with Penelope, buckle up because you haven't seen Phillip Crane. Their love story is the adage that 'everything about you the wrong person couldn't handle is the exact thing the right person has been waiting for'.
The critique I hear a lot is readers wanted Eloise with someone more exciting who challenges her. Phillip isn't a reformed rake with rogueish charm and toxic masculinity who needs a loving touch from the right ball buster to remind him to be human. And I can see the appeal for that kind of hero, especially for Eloise. But would that hero be a better match for Eloise, or is it simply a more entertaining story with a flashier hero for a flashy heroine?
The truth is Eloise is surrounded by people who challenge her. What she lacks is acceptance vs tolerance and genuine appreciation for what she's been told are flaws. Her brothers hate shooting with her because she's too good. Phillip doesn't care, he loves to see her be her awesome self. Her brothers find her too domineering, Phillip loves that she always has a plan and an opinion to share. Phillip isn't a pushover incapable of standing up to her. But he isn't going to fight or argue with her for the sake of it. He'd rather help her do what she wants to do and then make love to her all night afterwards.
Eloise is a person who is in constant battle with the world, with opinions and forces she cannot control but certainly would like to. Does she really need someone to challenge her at home or does she need someone who sees her as she is and accepts her fully, giving her a warm soft place to land? Does she need a sparring partner or a quiet champion who adores her, nurtures her, and is ready to step up to smooth her way when she needs it?
@whatsaweekend this is it!
