garbage queen

a sideblog || main = betelgeusing

[dogpuppy]

[memento-meliora]

forced to say “it’s okay!” Instead of throwing a fucking chair at their head

[wateredwizard]

Why does your post have lingerie on

[memento-meliora]

God forbid a bitch be feeling herself while mentally ill in this economy 😢

[only-tiktoks]

[funny-tik-toks]

[ivy-saurs]

randomly remembered this tweet and had to stop myself from bursting out laughing

[skopostheorie]

[diamondeyes-deluxe]

I work with kids and sometimes we have to do safety lessons with them about like, not telling strangers on the internet your home address or something. And sometimes the kids wont understand why, so you have to impart upon them that, well, some adults want to hurt children. And thats kind of difficult to do, because you have to beat around the bush, both because you dont want to scare them (while still making them understand how serious it is) and because you might lose your job if you explain it too straight forward.

Luckily, for some reason, the villain of one of the most popular franchises with children for the last 10 years happens to be a serial child murderer. So when a kid asks why they shouldnt trust strangers, instead of hand wringing and humhawing my answer out, I can just say "we dont always know when a strange adult has good intentions with children, or when they are William Afton."

[bellossom]

on a tiktok about fanta btw

[dogpuppy]

[tiktoks-i-enjoyed]

[pjackk]

Before and after yep hes mustard gravy

Didnt smell good so i poured it down the drain without take a bite

[pjackk]

My plugs got a special strain i be buyin in bulk

[funstyle]

i tried to come out of my shell and fucked it up and now im kinda lodged in here all weird

[kristina100000]

how it feels to be slightly tipsy while someone explains the rules of a board game that takes months to understand

[internetgreatesthits]

[mono-red-menace]

[unknown-but-existing]

i feel like this is more funny

[dogpuppy]

[barrymccaulkinem]

when you use a word and wonder if you used it right and you check and you correctly pulled an uncommon 3rd or 4th definition

[wizardarchetypes]

it's so crazy too bc i'll be like "this phrase/practice is being touted as ancient knowledge with a secret unbroken lineage, but it was quite literally made up in the 20th century. like we can trace it back to its very inception in like 1961." and someone will be like "that can't be true because my grandmother taught it to me." and i'm like yes your grandmother was 20 in 1961.