The Coolest Person You Will Ever Meet

Marlene 🤟Some of you can call me marls.

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

intro post!!!

What up, it’s ya boy, Marlene 🤟🤟

She/her, lesbian (men can kill themselves for all I care), I am in possession of eighteen years of age, and yes I did have to look up how to spell 18, if you laugh at me that is homophobic and I will turn you in to the homophobe police which is in fact, me.

I’m Ukrainian!! So if the situation calls for it, I very well might cuss you out in Russian

I study criminology which I picked solely on the fact that it sounded cool, and now I realise you have to learn like in other subjects and they don’t teach you to be a criminal.

ANYWAYSSSSSSS, HERE ARE THE BITCHES I KNOW

Such a nerd, but I still love u : @permanentlibraryresident

Definition of emo boy: @regulus-in-the-stars

IF I WASNT GAY ID ALR BE MARRIED TO HIM: @seriouslyserioussirius

Childhood bestie <33: @basicwhiteboyname

MOTHER MARY(in no world is she abt to be a virgin one): @mary-has-no-farm

REM!!: @rjlupin-chocolatelover

Proof that hot girls are whimsical: @the-smarter-rosier

Xenooo: @str4nge-lov3r

ALICEEEEE IN WONDERLANDD: @asinthegirl-in-wonderland

Cissy (WHY AM I JUST MCKINNON IN UR INTRO POST IM SO OFFENDED): @black-daffodil

The rosier guy: @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies

chaotic fuck: @battybitch-jr

This Ted guy: @ted-ta1ks

This girl Charity: @charity-fucking-burbage

Meadowes.: @look-its-dorcas

THATS IT FOR NOW FOLKSSSSS, BUH BYE DONT MISS ME TOO MUCH

[permanentlibraryresident]

studious queen (they locked me in the library bc no one noticed i was here)

@marlene-is-the-coolest @regulus-in-the-stars @seriouslyserioussirius @basicwhiteboyname @the-smarter-rosier @str4nge-lov3r @mary-has-no-farm @battybitch-jr @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies @look-its-dorcas @black-daffodil @asinthegirl-in-wonderland @rjlupin-chocolatelover

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

girl what 😭😭

Do u want me to come get u, I don’t have anything going on

[permanentlibraryresident]

no thanks, i have tea! and lots of work to do, and tea!

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Darling I’m outside and I have bolt cutters, are you sure?

[permanentlibraryresident]

very sure

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Ok, suit yourself

[permanentlibraryresident]

studious queen (they locked me in the library bc no one noticed i was here)

@marlene-is-the-coolest @regulus-in-the-stars @seriouslyserioussirius @basicwhiteboyname @the-smarter-rosier @str4nge-lov3r @mary-has-no-farm @battybitch-jr @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies @look-its-dorcas @black-daffodil @asinthegirl-in-wonderland @rjlupin-chocolatelover

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

girl what 😭😭

Do u want me to come get u, I don’t have anything going on

[permanentlibraryresident]

no thanks, i have tea! and lots of work to do, and tea!

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Darling I’m outside and I have bolt cutters, are you sure?

[permanentlibraryresident]

studious queen (they locked me in the library bc no one noticed i was here)

@marlene-is-the-coolest @regulus-in-the-stars @seriouslyserioussirius @basicwhiteboyname @the-smarter-rosier @str4nge-lov3r @mary-has-no-farm @battybitch-jr @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies @look-its-dorcas @black-daffodil @asinthegirl-in-wonderland @rjlupin-chocolatelover

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

girl what 😭😭

Do u want me to come get u, I don’t have anything going on

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Girl I’m not being funny my prof for sociology is hot

Like have u fucking seen her??

@permanentlibraryresident @charity-fucking-burbage

SHES FUCKING GORGEOUS??

[permanentlibraryresident]

@marlene-is-the-coolest i’m bored and you’ve not given me any new gossip in ages

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Ok fair

SO BASIXALLY, RIGHT, THIS BITCH IN MY PSYCH CLASS HAD THE AUDACITY TO ASK ME FOR MY GORGEOUS, BEAUTIFUL, HARD-EARNED GEL PENS, PROMISING TO GIVE THEM BACK AND THEN KEEPS THEM FOR ALL ETERNITY, AND THEN HAVIBG THE ABSOLUTE WRETCHED UNABASHEDNESS OF ASKING ME FOR EVEN MORE NEXT CLASS. LIKE BITCH TF U THINK IMMA GIVE U EVEN MORE??? NAHHHHHHH

Anyway, that’s about the most of what’s going on in my life so far, how r u?

[permanentlibraryresident]

when’s the wedding?

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

…that was a fast assumption

[permanentlibraryresident]

@marlene-is-the-coolest i’m bored and you’ve not given me any new gossip in ages

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Ok fair

SO BASIXALLY, RIGHT, THIS BITCH IN MY PSYCH CLASS HAD THE AUDACITY TO ASK ME FOR MY GORGEOUS, BEAUTIFUL, HARD-EARNED GEL PENS, PROMISING TO GIVE THEM BACK AND THEN KEEPS THEM FOR ALL ETERNITY, AND THEN HAVIBG THE ABSOLUTE WRETCHED UNABASHEDNESS OF ASKING ME FOR EVEN MORE NEXT CLASS. LIKE BITCH TF U THINK IMMA GIVE U EVEN MORE??? NAHHHHHHH

Anyway, that’s about the most of what’s going on in my life so far, how r u?

[charity-fucking-burbage]

@bitchwithaquill @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies @battybitch-jr @regulus-in-the-stars @the-smarter-rosier @black-daffodil @seriouslyserioussirius @basicwhiteboyname @permanentlibraryresident @marlene-is-the-coolest @mary-has-no-farm @str4nge-lov3r @asinthegirl-in-wonderland @rjlupin-chocolatelover

Guys, Aurora gave me a map of the constellations for seemingly no reason!!!

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Awww how’d she take it

[charity-fucking-burbage]

Idk, she just randomly gave this to me.

I'm scared.

Is she threatening me?

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Bet you anything she isn’t

[charity-fucking-burbage]

Guys, I bought myself a pet turtle!!!

Yes, I checked the rules and it is allowed

@bitchwithaquill @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies @battybitch-jr @regulus-in-the-stars @the-smarter-rosier @black-daffodil @seriouslyserioussirius @basicwhiteboyname @permanentlibraryresident @marlene-is-the-coolest @mary-has-no-farm @str4nge-lov3r @asinthegirl-in-wonderland @rjlupin-chocolatelover

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMFOMGOMG???????

WHAT ARE YOU GONNA CALL IT

[charity-fucking-burbage]

Apus!!!! I'm going to call him Apus!!!

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

GORGEOUS NAME, FITS HI SO WELL

[charity-fucking-burbage]

@bitchwithaquill @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies @battybitch-jr @regulus-in-the-stars @the-smarter-rosier @black-daffodil @seriouslyserioussirius @basicwhiteboyname @permanentlibraryresident @marlene-is-the-coolest @mary-has-no-farm @str4nge-lov3r @asinthegirl-in-wonderland @rjlupin-chocolatelover

Guys, Aurora gave me a map of the constellations for seemingly no reason!!!

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Awww how’d she take it

[charity-fucking-burbage]

Guys, I bought myself a pet turtle!!!

Yes, I checked the rules and it is allowed

@bitchwithaquill @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies @battybitch-jr @regulus-in-the-stars @the-smarter-rosier @black-daffodil @seriouslyserioussirius @basicwhiteboyname @permanentlibraryresident @marlene-is-the-coolest @mary-has-no-farm @str4nge-lov3r @asinthegirl-in-wonderland @rjlupin-chocolatelover

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMFOMGOMG???????

WHAT ARE YOU GONNA CALL IT

[charity-fucking-burbage]

@bitchwithaquill @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies @battybitch-jr @regulus-in-the-stars @the-smarter-rosier @black-daffodil @seriouslyserioussirius @basicwhiteboyname @permanentlibraryresident @marlene-is-the-coolest @mary-has-no-farm @str4nge-lov3r @asinthegirl-in-wonderland @rjlupin-chocolatelover

Okay, so you all know about the Aurora Sinistra girl that I told you all about???

I took Marlene's advice and I asked her what her favorite constellation and planet was and she glared at me for, like, five minutes before she told me that her favorite planet was Saturn and her favorite constellation was Canis Minor.

Are we friends now or what????

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Ok I guess she’s not a yapper

Idk ask her what kinds music she likes

U could be almost friends

I think

[charity-fucking-burbage]

There's a girl named Aurora Sinistra that I share my dorm with and she really likes Astronomy and I really really really want to be friends with her. WHAT DO I DO?!??!?!?

@bitchwithaquill @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies @battybitch-jr @regulus-in-the-stars @the-smarter-rosier @black-daffodil @seriouslyserioussirius @basicwhiteboyname @permanentlibraryresident @marlene-is-the-coolest @mary-has-no-farm @str4nge-lov3r @asinthegirl-in-wonderland @rjlupin-chocolatelover

Marlene I'm HEAVILY relying on you for this, you're the girl expert.

Also, are Lily and Regulus together yet? Because if they aren't I'm shoving them in a broom closet and I'm not letting them out until they make out. ❤️

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Ok u alr share a dorm w her so like talk?

Also if she’s into astronomy, just ask her what her favourite constellation or planet is

Also I have no fucking clue what they’re doing, but I’m w u

[charity-fucking-burbage]

Okay, I'll do that!!!!

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Great tell me how it goes :))

[charity-fucking-burbage]

There's a girl named Aurora Sinistra that I share my dorm with and she really likes Astronomy and I really really really want to be friends with her. WHAT DO I DO?!??!?!?

@bitchwithaquill @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies @battybitch-jr @regulus-in-the-stars @the-smarter-rosier @black-daffodil @seriouslyserioussirius @basicwhiteboyname @permanentlibraryresident @marlene-is-the-coolest @mary-has-no-farm @str4nge-lov3r @asinthegirl-in-wonderland @rjlupin-chocolatelover

Marlene I'm HEAVILY relying on you for this, you're the girl expert.

Also, are Lily and Regulus together yet? Because if they aren't I'm shoving them in a broom closet and I'm not letting them out until they make out. ❤️

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Ok u alr share a dorm w her so like talk?

Also if she’s into astronomy, just ask her what her favourite constellation or planet is

Also I have no fucking clue what they’re doing, but I’m w u

[charity-fucking-burbage]

Help, there's this boy named Severus in my educational psychology class that I really want to be friends with! What do I do? Do I just start poking his arm over and over until he pays attention to me???

@bitchwithaquill @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies @battybitch-jr @regulus-in-the-stars @the-smarter-rosier @black-daffodil @seriouslyserioussirius @basicwhiteboyname @permanentlibraryresident @marlene-is-the-coolest @mary-has-no-farm @str4nge-lov3r @asinthegirl-in-wonderland @rjlupin-chocolatelover

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Wait that fucker?

Why would you wanna be friends with him, he looks like a right dickhead

But pop off Queen, I guess, so just talk to him?

Idk men aren’t rly my thing

[charity-fucking-burbage]

I'll make sure to ask you when I want to be friends with a girl, then.

But thank you for your advice anyways!

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Wait was that sarcasm?

If that’s sarcasm I will beat the fucking shit of you.

Ofccc np <333

[charity-fucking-burbage]

No, I wasn't be sarcastic, I am grateful for your advice :]

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

saw thank you so much

Dorcas needs to take notes

[charity-fucking-burbage]

Help, there's this boy named Severus in my educational psychology class that I really want to be friends with! What do I do? Do I just start poking his arm over and over until he pays attention to me???

@bitchwithaquill @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies @battybitch-jr @regulus-in-the-stars @the-smarter-rosier @black-daffodil @seriouslyserioussirius @basicwhiteboyname @permanentlibraryresident @marlene-is-the-coolest @mary-has-no-farm @str4nge-lov3r @asinthegirl-in-wonderland @rjlupin-chocolatelover

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Wait that fucker?

Why would you wanna be friends with him, he looks like a right dickhead

But pop off Queen, I guess, so just talk to him?

Idk men aren’t rly my thing

[charity-fucking-burbage]

I'll make sure to ask you when I want to be friends with a girl, then.

But thank you for your advice anyways!

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Wait was that sarcasm?

If that’s sarcasm I will beat the fucking shit of you.

Ofccc np <333

[charity-fucking-burbage]

Help, there's this boy named Severus in my educational psychology class that I really want to be friends with! What do I do? Do I just start poking his arm over and over until he pays attention to me???

@bitchwithaquill @rosie-pocket-full-of-posies @battybitch-jr @regulus-in-the-stars @the-smarter-rosier @black-daffodil @seriouslyserioussirius @basicwhiteboyname @permanentlibraryresident @marlene-is-the-coolest @mary-has-no-farm @str4nge-lov3r @asinthegirl-in-wonderland @rjlupin-chocolatelover

[marlene-is-the-coolest]

Wait that fucker?

Why would you wanna be friends with him, he looks like a right dickhead

But pop off Queen, I guess, so just talk to him?

Idk men aren’t rly my thing